Chapter 36
THIRTY-SIX
My heart has been racing since I climbed into this tractor early this morning, and now it hammers so hard I think it might beat right out of my chest.
I watch the seed population drop on the monitor as the planter rolls across the stress zone of the hollow heart field and take a deep breath. But this is exactly what it’s supposed to do. This is what Levi says it needs to do, so I know this is right.
He spent two full days building the prescription for this field, going through every piece of data he had. Now I’m planting it and watching the system carry out what he designed. And I feel good about it. Because I actually understand it.
We’re not fixing the field. Nothing about it needs fixing. Instead, we’re managing the stress zone.
Levi built a variable-rate planting program that directly targets the cause of hollow heart, spreading the seeds further apart beneath the soil, so the plant roots have more room instead of fighting each other underground. Because that’s the whole issue with hollow heart.
When the plants are pushed through stress first, such as cold soil or shifting moisture, growth slows. And the moment conditions improve, the plants surge, tubers expand faster than they should, and they split open inside.
But he wrote the prescription so that surge never happens. Fewer plants means less competition in the soil, which steadies the growth instead of letting everything rush forward when the pressure eases. The crop keeps moving at a pace the potatoes can actually handle.
And now, it feels like this part of the field is finally understood.
I watch the seeding rate stay steady as I cross into the second half of the strip that used to appear as a separate zone on the map. But now it reads the entire section as the same zone. And I can’t help but smile.
Two zones that have so many differences, yet they share the same stress. They just needed to be brought together and seen as one.
I shift my gaze across the field behind me at the rows I’ve already planted, and my pulse slows. This will work. It has to work.
Everything we talked about and planned runs through my head like a checklist, which I’ve been doing nonstop today.
Besides the planting adjustments, we’ll start irrigating this zone earlier and more gradually, so the soil moisture stays consistent instead of flipping between dry and saturated.
Levi also caught a pattern in the data that shows uneven nitrogen uptake whenever the crop recovers from stress, so we’ll cut back the fertilizer rate and shift the timing.
And we’ll harvest this section earlier than the rest of the field to reduce the window where hollow heart tends to develop.
I nod to myself as I finish reviewing the plan in my head for the hundredth time just today and release a long breath. In a few months, we’ll know if we’re right.
And if we are, it will confirm that the field itself isn’t the issue. It’s the pressure on it.
Which feels true in other areas as well.
Sometimes, it’s just a bad season. But there’s always a fix for a bad season.
By the time I finish planting, the sun hangs low over the horizon, and the sky burns with streaks of orange and gold that spill across the entire field. The light stretches over the wide-open space, bathing everything in a soft, rich glow that highlights the freshly planted rows.
As I turn the tractor to head back to the farm, I see Levi standing at the edge of the field, hands in his pockets as he looks out at the rows.
I bring the tractor to a stop when I reach him and shut off the engine, the sudden quiet settling over me as I climb down from the cab. My eyes immediately lock onto his as he smiles at me, and I can’t help but pause and just take him in.
He’s wearing a crewneck and jeans, looking relaxed and easy with his sleeves pushed up his forearms, and the breeze gently blowing his dark hair over his forehead.
The soft orange glow of the setting sun washes over him, and standing out here surrounded by farmland, he looks exactly like the boy I grew up with.
He’s beautiful.
He looks out across the field, and I draw in a breath before stepping closer to stand beside him.
“It’s going to work,” he says.
My eyes travel across the rows in the middle stretch of the field, and I nod, feeling it deep in my bones that he’s right. “It is.”
We stand in silence as we observe the freshly planted rows, and my mind wanders to the thing I’ve been trying not to focus on too much the past few days. Which I haven’t been very successful with.
We’ve both shifted our focus and interactions onto this field, and neither of us have brought up the fact that we kissed.
I’ve been spending all my time maintaining equipment, loading seed, and preparing everything to plant, while Levi was buried in maps and data, building the prescription for this field.
Any time we spoke, it was about work and what we needed to do.
But it’s done now.
The field is planted, and now we let the crop grow and manage the conditions around it.
So now… we have to figure this out.
But as I stand here with him, looking out over this field I held so close to my chest and struggled with for so long, a small smile tugs at the corner of my lips. It only got better when I let him in.
My life is better when he stands beside me. I’m better when he stands beside me.
I need him with me. I always have.
I love him. I always have.
And when I think about that kiss… I realize just how much I liked it.
And the fact that I’m not mad, anxious, or running away means something. I still want to run to him, even when things feel confusing.
Maybe that means it’s not confusing at all.
“So,” Levi says, shifting his weight slightly on his feet. “I think we should probably talk…”
I turn my head towards him at the same time he turns towards me.
The sunset catches in his eyes, drawing out the gold and amber flecks that always hide in them, and I simply stare into them while everything in my head settles into place.
The thoughts that have been circling for days finally stop moving, and suddenly, everything is crystal clear.
“I’m sorry for… kissing you,” Levi says, his eyes moving between mine as if he’s trying to read my thoughts.
I nod slowly while my gaze moves across his features, taking in the strands of dark hair blowing gently in the breeze and the way his jaw tightens as he bites the inside of his lip.
“Did you like it?” I ask.
His brows lift slightly, and his chest rises with a breath. He pauses for a moment before he releases it and nods. “Yes.”
The corner of my lips tilts up, and his eyes immediately drop to my mouth. And my stomach flips at the sight.
“Me too,” I say.
His eyes fly back up to mine and widen.
My heart thumps hard as I take the single step forward to close the space between us, and lift my hand to the side of his face while I press my lips to his.
His body stiffens for a moment, and a flicker of panic rushes through me as I think I made a mistake. But then his hands slide up my back and pull me closer, and any doubt I had fades away.
I have no idea where the courage to do this is coming from, or why it feels so… right. But I don’t care. Because it does feel right. It feels like this is exactly where I’m supposed to be.
His lips part, and the moment my tongue meets his, heat runs up my spine, and I tighten my grip on him.
I’m kissing Levi.
I’m kissing Levi.
I like kissing Levi.
My best friend.
His hands press into my back as our kiss deepens, and we stand together in the warmth and soft glow of the setting sun, at the edge of the field that brought us back together.
The field I held on to when everyone wanted to throw it away.
The field that brought Levi back into my life and showed me we’re not broken. We were just under pressure.
My hand falls from the side of his face as I run both of my hands down his sides, feeling the tight, defined muscles under his shirt, and the strength he carries in him.
It surrounds me like something comforting and protective, making me feel safe, even in this unfamiliar territory we’ve found ourselves in.
Eventually, our kiss slows, and when our lips part, we remain close enough that I can feel the warmth of his breath across my lips as he releases a light chuckle.
“I had no idea how you felt about any of this,” he says.
I smile. “I didn’t either.” Then I slide my gaze out to the field. “But whatever this is… it seems to work.”
Levi’s hands slide down my back until they reach my hips, and I bring my attention back to him, seeing the pure joy dancing in his eyes.
“This is kinda fucked up,” he says with a soft laugh.
“Really fucked up,” I agree. “But… it’s always been you and me, Vi.”
A slow smile spreads over his lips, and he nods, tugging me closer to brush his lips over mine.
“You and me, Si.”