Chapter One #4
At only seventeen, Gaz didn’t lead the team, but my gaze fell on him nonetheless.
He was the tallest member of the patrol, and the low-hanging sun seemed to light up his golden skin so that it all but glowed.
He had the beginnings of a beard, and he looked so much like a man that, at first, I almost didn’t recognize him.
I had to press a hand to my belly to stop the fluttering, and when he passed, my head turned to follow him.
“Keep your tongue in your mouth, Mara,” my mother had said.
I hadn’t known she was beside me or I would have behaved more circumspectly. I almost retorted that she was one to talk, but I closed my lips tight and resolved not to be caught ogling Gaz or any other man again.
I was not my mother.
Remembering her words that day, I kept my gaze straight ahead, resisting the urge to catch a glimpse of Gaz now.
He’d shown no particular interest in me that day or any other.
He treated me just like all the other patrol members.
Just because he steadied me with a hand on my arm or a pat on the back, didn’t mean he was attracted to me.
My mother had bemoaned my lack of attractiveness since my growth spurt at the age of nine.
Not only did I lack the clear, dark eyes so desirable in our kingdom, I was taller than every woman and most men.
Earslehen men found short, athletic women attractive.
I was tall and slim and not nearly as muscular as many of my kinswomen.
I was often told I had a pretty face, and that seemed to be a consolation compliment to counter the drawback of my unfortunate height.
When I was younger, I hoped that pretty face might make up for my flaws, but no boys showed any interest in me.
I hadn’t been kissed, except in childish games, and I’d never been courted.
Not that I would have welcomed the attentions of the men eligible to court me. The male nobles who ranked high enough to marry a royal princess were older than my father.
“We do all take chances,” Gaz said. “That’s the nature of patrol, but you seem to take more than most.”
I sighed. “Is this to be another lecture on how impulsive I am? I didn’t act impulsively. Finnrey and I discussed it. The boy had to be dealt with. Honestly, it was far kinder than leaving him for hours while we found you two and went back.”
“But why did you have to do it?”
I opened my mouth and closed it again. I wouldn’t betray Finnrey by telling anyone about her reaction to the boy or how she feared she’d been bitten. “I just had to,” I said.
“You know,” Gaz said, his voice sounding sort of far away. I peeked at him and saw he was looking off into the distance. “Sometimes you make it really hard to protect you.”
“Protect me!” I stopped walking and my hands went to my hips. “I don’t need your protection Gaz of Westower. I can take care of myself. I’m two and twenty and have been doing patrols for ten years.” And then a thought occurred to me. “Did my father ask you to watch out for me?”
My father, King Wollem V, had been king for almost forty years.
I was but one of his many children. The current queen was his fourth wife, and I had half-brothers and sisters younger than me.
Finnrey and her siblings were the product of his union with the second queen.
My mother had been the third queen. She was also the sole queen to give him only one child—me.
And she was the queen known for her infidelity.
She’d been discovered in the bed of another man, and the king had divorced her that very afternoon.
I’d been about three at the time and very confused as to why we had to move out of the castle proper.
To the king’s credit, he made sure to keep me close.
I always knew he loved me as much as any of his other children.
And when he’d married his fourth wife, about eighteen years ago, he’d pulled me aside the day of the wedding and told me that my mother was the only woman he’d ever loved.
I’d wanted to ask him why he was marrying another woman then, but I didn’t dare. Besides, by then my mother had paired with her third partner, so it wasn’t as though she was available.
The king had never outright told me I was his favorite child, but as I said, he did once tell me my mother was the only woman he’d ever loved, and except for my unusual height, I looked a great deal like her.
The king had never tried to exempt me or any of his offspring from patrol duty, but it wouldn’t have surprised me if he’d told Gaz or one of the other patrols to keep an eye on me.
“Is that what this is about? The king promised you a handsome sum if you kept me safe?”
Gaz gave me a look I knew well. It said are-you-mad and here-we-go-again all wrapped together. I was immediately sorry I’d opened my big mouth. “Pay me no mind,” I said before he could answer. “I’m the one who’s a dusthead.”
“The king never said a word to me about you. He’s never said a word about protecting his daughters to anyone, that I know of.”
“Good.” I nodded brusquely. How much longer until we were back at camp? My cheeks burned, and I felt awkward.
“But he didn’t need to,” Gaz said.
I glanced at him, brow furrowed.
“I like watching out for you.”
I opened my mouth to say something, but my mind was a complete blank.
I had no idea what to say. Thankfully, I didn’t need a retort because Gaz stretched his long legs and caught up with Finnrey and Nize in three strides.
Nize put an arm around him, and the two started laughing.
I couldn’t help but stare at Gaz’s back.
I like watching out for you.
What did that mean?
I’d carried feelings for Gaz so long without any encouragement from him whatsoever that I’d long ago given up hoping he’d ever see me as anything more than a gangly girl from the castle, another princess.
Mayhap, sometimes, I wondered how we so often ended up in the same patrol team.
But then Finnrey and I were often on the same team too.
But now I began to think perhaps it wasn’t simply chance.
Had Gaz found a way to ensure we were on the same team?
Neither bribes nor favoritism were common in Earsleh where everyone felt honors should be earned.
But there were always some who could be bought.
If Gaz had bribed someone to pair us, why? Did he feel about me the way I felt about him? Did he—
“Cadet Mara! Cadet Finnrey!”
At the gravelly sound of Morll’s voice, my head jerked up and all romantic thoughts fled. “Sir!” I said. Finnrey answered the same, sparing me one quick look over her shoulder.
“We’ve been looking for you. There’s someone here from the castle to take you back.”
“What?” Finnrey said at the same time I said, “I don’t understand.”
“You don’t need to understand, cadets,” Morll said. “Get back to camp, pack up, and return to the castle.”
“But it’s almost dark,” Finnrey said, stating the obvious. Except in case of emergency, no one outside the castle walls traveled in the dark. Hollows seemed to prefer the dark to the light. Finnrey speculated that the sun hurt their eyes.
“Then you’d better hurry,” Morll all but growled. When we simply stood and stared at him, he clapped his hands, startling us. Finnrey and I started running, heading toward camp. I swore we heard Morll mutter, “Princesses” as we ran past him.
Back at camp everything was in disarray.
Normally this was a time when everyone gathered to eat and swap stories about the day.
I’d been dreading having to talk about killing the baby Hollow, but now I realized I wouldn’t have the chance.
A contingent of no less than a half dozen of the king’s soldiers stood at the edge of the camp, looking gruff and impatient.
I recognized one of them, a man who had been in my father’s service since before I was born, and approached him instead of arrowing for my tent like Finnrey did.
“Ecdra,” I said, panting from the exertion of my run. “What’s going on? Why are you here?”
“Good evening, my lady,” he said. “Orders from your father to bring you and Lady Finnrey back as soon as possible.” He was shorter than I, but he still managed to look at a spot over my head.
“Is something wrong? Is my father ill?”
“The king is fine.”
“Then his wife—”
“My lady,” Ecdra said, his voice sounding impatient. “I don’t know why you’ve been summoned. I’m following orders. We need to leave posthaste. If there’s anything here you want to take, get it now.”
“Fine.” I ran back to the tent I shared with Finnrey and stepped inside to find her stuffing everything she could into her pack. She looked over her shoulder at me.
“What did Ecdra tell you?”
“He says he doesn’t know anything.”
She snorted. “Ecdra knows everything. Even if Papa didn’t tell him what this is about, Ecdra has some idea.”
“Well, mayhap you can get it out of him. The only thing I’m sure of is that they’re in a hurry.”
Fortunately, we traveled light on patrol. I had a change of clothing, my bedroll, and a few personal items—my eating utensils, cup, and an extra blanket. I stuffed the clothes in my pack, doing such a poor job that I couldn’t fit anything else.
“Just leave the rest,” Finnrey said. “We can ask one of the others to bring it with them when they return. The patrol ends in a few days.”
I nodded. “Don’t you think it’s strange that Papa should call us back now when we’d be home in a few days anyway?”
Finnrey took my arm as we stepped outside. “Whatever this is about, it’s not good news.”
Morll and Ecdra were standing together at the edge of camp, their heads bent close.
“I wager Ecdra’s telling Morll what he wouldn’t tell you,” Finnrey muttered.
“I’m not taking that wager.”
Catastrophic scenarios played in my mind. The Barrier had been breached and millions of Hollows were spilling into the outerlands. Was that why we’d seen more of late? The Barrier had ruptured before, but that was years ago, and it had been reinforced since then...
I spotted Gaz and Nize coming into camp. Gaz caught my eye and gave me a questioning look. I shrugged and followed Finnrey to where Ecdra and the other soldiers waited. Morll stepped back. “Are you sure you don’t want me to send cadets with you?” Morll asked.
“You’ll already be down two,” Ecdra answered. “I won’t weaken you further. But we’re ready for anything, and I promise you we’ll be cautious.”
A couple of the patrol members stepped forward and offered food wrapped in linen cloth to the soldiers, Finnrey, and me.
The soldiers started eating immediately.
I wasn’t hungry, but I made myself nibble at it anyway.
It was several hours’ walk back to the castle.
I’d need nourishment to keep up my strength and stay on alert for Hollows, especially knowing some had been in the area recently.
“Move out!” Ecdra ordered, and Finnrey and I were quickly swallowed up by the soldiers who situated us in the middle, almost as though we were prisoners being escorted somewhere.
“I don’t like this,” Finnrey said under her breath so only I could hear.
“Neither do I.” But that wasn’t exactly true.
My sense of adventure, which caused me to be labeled impulsive, relished this turn of events.
Something new was happening. Something different.
Exhilaration coursed through me, making it difficult to keep pace with the others. I wanted to run back to the castle.
I turned and looked over my shoulder as we left the camp.
I was a little taller than the guards and could see over their heads.
The members of our team stood watching us go.
Morll stood in the center of the group, hands on his hips, wide, barrel chest heaving in and out.
Gaz was beside him. My gaze met his and he lifted one hand, made a fist and covered it with his other hand.
The common gesture meant be careful. When a mother made it to a child it meant I’m watching over you or I’ll cover you as represented by the open hand closing over the smaller fist.
But I’d also seen lovers make that gesture, and in that context it still meant be careful but there was the added meaning that the one making the gesture would give his or her body to protect the other.
“What’s wrong?” Finnrey asked.
Quickly, I turned back to face forward. “Nothing.”
Except now I’d spend the entire walk back wondering exactly what Gaz had been signaling.