Chapter 57
Scarlett
Now that you’re here though, I feel like maybe I was always meant to be here, waiting for you.
Boy, Kenzie would have loved hearing that.
This man and I have been inseparable for months now but we’ve danced around any words of meaning.
Now, under the supervision of the stars, this man lays his heart bare in front of me.
I wait for the typical sarcastic voice to pop up and say something stupid like well, that sure was a waste of your time.
Or oof, should’ve picked someone better.
Or even, wow, that was dumb. But none of it comes.
For once, that cynical voice is quiet and all that shines is a glowing feeling of appreciation.
One time I had a first date with a guy who was absolutely perfect according to his dating profile.
He was tall, dark hair, a great job where he wore a suit to work, tattoos underneath those dress shirts.
I pictured all the billionaire fantasies I could play out with him.
Then I met him. He was living proof that you can curate an online profile to be anyone you want to be, but there’s usually no changing who you actually are.
By the end of the night I wondered if someone else made his profile without him contributing at all.
Sure, he was still tall with dark hair, tattoos, and a great job but his personality couldn’t have clashed harder with the profile.
He was the biggest golden retriever and while there’s nothing wrong with that, it just wasn’t what I thought I was walking into.
I played nice, I said all the right things but I made sure not to do anything that would lead him on.
When he walked me to his car I swiped my face to the left real quick to avoid a kiss on the lips.
He didn’t even seem phased by the fact that he landed on my cheek.
That man looked me dead in my eyes and said, “Do you want to get married?” I laughed out loud and said, “To you?” and then laughed harder.
To give him credit he did lose all of his golden retriever energy with that.
I had a hard time caring about how deflated he looked when he walked to his car because I just couldn’t get over how bizarre the whole thing was.
After months with Jake though, this feels like something out of one of Kenzie’s movies. The moment that changes the status of the relationship and brings the two main characters together. It’s not lost on me that this time I find it sweet rather than terrifying.
“You think you’ve been waiting for me?” I ask.
“Without really knowing what I was waiting for until now, yeah. I do.” The confidence in his voice bolsters mine.
“I think I might love you, but I haven’t really believed in love in a while so I’m having a hard time processing it.” It isn’t easy to be this vulnerable. I usually hate talking about my feelings but after Jake took the time to say what he did, it feels like I owe him honesty.
“That’s alright. I know I love you but I’ve been waiting to feel like you might be ready to hear it,” he says.
“And do you feel like I am?”
“Not quite yet, but I have a sneaking suspicion you’re getting closer.”
He sits quietly, his focus on the stars instead of me.
He’s giving me space to process, or else he’s inwardly not as calm and can’t handle looking at me.
I don’t know which one makes me like him even more.
I contort my body in the chair in order to lean over and lay my head on his shoulder.
The sun has been gone for a while and the chill in the air makes me shiver slightly.
“Come on, let’s go inside,” Jake whispers.
I take one last look at the stars, clouds slowly moving in to block the view and nod my head against his shoulder, agreeing to go inside.
We walk, wordlessly inside the sliding glass door and into my little cottage.
Another thing that I’ve become so proud to call mine.
Jake walks over to the freezer grabbing the two pint size tubs of ice cream I have in there.
He goes over to where he now knows I keep the spoons and grabs two of them.
When he looks back at me he catches me staring at him.
“What?” He says, acting a little self conscious. “Do I have something on my face?”
“No,” I say with a soft smile as I shake my head. “No, you’re perfect.”
He balances the ice cream tubs and the spoons and then leads me back to my bedroom.
I’m thrown off at first when he walks over to my side of the bed until I see him set down the rocky road ice cream on my night stand.
Carefully, he lays the spoon over the top of the lid and then pulls the covers down, patting the bed.
I laugh as he moves to what has become his side of the bed when he stays over and does the same routine, minus patting the bed.
He removes his shirt and his jeans, getting into bed in his black boxer briefs.
I stare at him, not moving until he pats the bed beside him again.
This adorable, wordless show of how our lives have slowly merged together is making me feel like I’ve opened my eyes for the first time.
In the past I would have felt like this was all a gross intrusion of my privacy.
But now? Now I want nothing more than to hop into bed next to this man.
I strip out of my jeans, throwing them haphazardly on the floor.
Pulling my shirt over my head, it lands in a pile on top of my jeans, my bra to join them next.
I debate on joining him in bed with just my panties on but decide against it and throw on yet another shirt I’ve acquired from Jake.
The feel of the fabric against my skin, the smell of Jake in my nose calms my nervous system and with a deep breath in, I join him in bed.
“Don’t forget the ice cream,” he says, lifting his spoonful of ice cream to show me how it’s done. When I’m finally settled with my ice cream opened he asks, “Twilight or Sweet Home Alabama?”
I gape at him. This man held me against his chest while I cried.
Didn’t rush me when I explained how I was feeling.
Practically told me he loved me but without expecting a response.
Brought me inside, seemingly without sex on his mind.
Got me ice cream and now wants to put on one of my comfort movies.
“Okay. I think I’m ready.”
“Ready for what? You didn’t tell me which movie.” That line between his eyebrows is there again and I attempt to wipe it away with my thumb.
“I’m ready for you to tell me,” I say, forcing bravery.
“Tell you what? That you’re the most amazing woman I’ve ever met?
That you are fiercely strong, sexier than should be legal, and the reason I wake up in the morning?
Is that what you want me to tell you?” He’s being coy with me, I bite the inside of my cheek and slowly shake my head no.
“Oh, is it how my favorite part of the day has become whichever part where you’re there?
How when I’m not with you I think about what you would be saying or doing if you were there with me?
How I’ve been secretly reading a book that I saw on your book shelf but you didn’t tell me to read because now you have me addicted to reading romance books of all things?
Is that it?” I feel the tears welling up in my eyes again as I shake my head from side to side once more.
“Okay, then it has to be this: I love you Scarlett. I love you like a man who has been going through life like a big ugly green ogre. I love you like a man who has had a hole inside of him. A puzzle piece missing in the shape of you. I love you more than I’ve known I’m capable of. ”
I set my ice cream down on the night stand next to me and as the beginning of Twilight plays in the background I climb on top of Jake, straddling my legs over his and kiss him.
I let the tears form and slide silently down my cheeks as Jake and I kiss slowly.
After breaking apart I sit back and gaze into his eyes. “I love you too, Jake.”