Chapter 6
six
I’m poking the fire to death.
Hoping that if I move the logs long enough, I’ll no longer see the spot where I threw the scrap of fabric that read “Mrs. Fischer” that clung to her thigh.
I have no reason to be this irrationally upset. I got dressed this morning knowing I would be attending her wedding. That I’d have to see her in a white dress. And that she’d walk down the aisle to a man who didn’t deserve her.
It killed me knowing that she was going to marry him.
Still stings now that she hasn’t taken off his ring.
But when I had her standing practically naked in front of me, all smooth skin and the soft curves I’ve dreamed about, I felt like I had died and gone to heaven. Only to be dropped into the pits of hell when I saw his last name wrapped around her skin.
The thought of her almost taking his name had me raging hotter than this fire pit before me.
So yes, for a split second there, I lost my goddamn mind and tore it off her body. And since I’d already lost all sense of reasoning, I tossed it into the fire.
After I was sure the coast was clear and she was locked in my bathroom, I snuck back into the house and placed a pair of thick wool socks and a couple of Band-Aids on top of the kitchen island, hoping she would see them.
I’d made a mental note to give them to her as soon as I saw that her feet were hurting, but I’d gotten sidetracked when she begged me to undress her in the middle of my home.
The same home I’d planned on spending the weekend in, drowning my sorrows in beers and frozen pizzas while Daisy was supposed to be prancing around in a bikini on her honeymoon.
My mind still has trouble catching up on how we got here.
Specifically the part where Daisy was standing naked in front of me. And thank God she wasn’t facing me, because after years of barely using most of my facial muscles and learning how to keep my emotions locked up tight, I somehow forgot how to close my jaw and keep my eyes above ass level.
For the last fifteen minutes, I’ve given myself the harshest pep talk known to man, the kind that would make some of my players cry if I unleashed on them, which I try not to do too often.
I’m supposed to be her friend.
She’s fucking losing her mind over the stunt she pulled today. And I can’t get my cock to stop stirring at the memory of her soft curves beneath my fingertips or the way she got goose bumps when I ran my thumb over an angry-looking mark on her skin.
Fuck.
Here I go again.
If I don’t wrap my head around the fact that Daisy is off limits, and fast, I’m going to have to toss myself into the fire. Otherwise, I risk doing something stupid and hurting her.
I have my demons, and it’s only a matter of time before the skeletons in my closet come back out to haunt me. And there is no way in hell I’d let any of that mess spill over onto Daisy, especially after what she’s gone through.
I contemplate our next steps as I sit here, engaging in a one-sided fight with a small fire, trying to figure out if I should act as if nothing happened or get it out in the open and then convince her it wasn’t a big deal.
Maybe I saw a bug on her garter and wanted to make sure she didn’t get bit?
Surely she’s not used to the critters up here and wouldn’t question my actions too thoroughly, right?
Time ticks on, and I’m starting to wonder if she’s come to her senses and driven off in my truck, having come too close to feeling like she was starring in her own true crime podcast with a caveman as a roommate.
But then I see her.
Coming out through the sliding door, wearing a graphic T-shirt and black leggings.
She’s also wearing the socks I left for her, and somehow the sight has the tension in my chest easing.
She dangles two beers in her hands as she makes her way toward me. “This seat taken?” She points at the empty Adirondack chair next to mine.
“It’s gonna cost ya.” I nod at one of the uncapped beers.
Knowing that she walked through my kitchen and made herself at home makes me feel like she’s not planning to make a run for it. At least tonight.
She hands me a beer before she takes a seat and makes herself comfortable.
“So… I know I’ve been a complete basket case, and you’re probably questioning why you ever made conversation with the weird, quiet girl at work.
So I’m going to make things easier and fly out of here early tomorrow morning.
I thought it over in the shower and decided that as soon as I can get a signal on my phone, I’ll text Nick and let him know that he can ship me off to one of his houses.
He’s probably got one or two I don’t even know about,” she finishes in a rush.
“You want to leave?” I manage to keep the panic out of my voice somehow.
Her eyebrows furrow. “Well, no—I mean—” She closes her eyes, sighing deeply as she sinks farther into her chair.
“Luke, I’m a mess. You’re a good friend, but I don’t want to dump all of my mistakes on your doorstep.
You deserve to enjoy your time off without having to worry about me begging you to rip my clothes off. ” Her eyes snap open and look my way.
My eyebrows must hit my hairline and her mouth gapes open as she realizes what she said and how it sounded.
“I didn’t mean it like that. Of course you wouldn’t want to—and that’s not, err—” She releases a frustrated cry as she buries her head in her hands.
“Ugh, I’m doing it again. I’m hazardous to be around right now.
It’s as if I reset my personal factory settings and now my brain doesn’t know the proper way to compute.
If you want, I can ask Nick to send someone for me tonight. I’ve already made a fool—”
“Daisy,” I interrupt, then wait until she lifts her head and rests her defeated eyes on me. “What do you want?”
Confusion mars her face. “What do you mean?”
I exhale slowly, trying my best to not influence her. “It’s simple: what do you want? Do you want to leave, or do you want to stay?”
She shakes her head. “I’m imposing. You should be—”
“Not what I asked, Daze. I’ll stay here all night until I get an answer.
And before you start worrying about something I haven’t voiced, let me be very clear here.
You are not imposing. You have not made a fool of yourself.
And every negative thought you’ve had about yourself tonight is flat-out wrong.
So with that cleared up, I’ll ask again. What do you want?”
She stares at me, and I can see her trying to put together the puzzle pieces where there are none.
“It’s simple, Daisy. Stay here with me or go. What do you want?”
She stares off into the lake. “Making decisions has never been simple for me,” she whispers.
“If you stay, it should be because you feel safe and comfortable here. Not because you think you’ll be hurting my feelings if you leave.
If you go, it’s because you know there is somewhere that can give you exactly what you need right now.
Take your time. You have options. You always have options.
So when you’re ready, tell me what you want. ”
She looks up at the sky lit up with stars, the kind that would be impossible to see in the city. She takes a sip of her beer and lolls her head to the side, facing me. “I want to stay.”
I want to punch the air in excitement like I do when my team is on a winning streak. But I keep my body lax as I ask, “Are you sure? I promise you there is no wrong answer. This is about you and what you need. I only want to be the person who helps you get whatever it is you want.”
She takes a longer sip of her beer, this time nodding along as she considers something. “There is one thing I need from you.”
“Name it,” I say far too quickly.
She starts to peel the label off the beer bottle. “What are the chances of you having complete memory loss after seeing my ass? And does drinking this beer help move along that process?”
I groan as I tip my head back and run my free hand over my eyes. I didn’t expect her to bring it up tonight, much less erupt into giggles.
“I promise to keep myself fully clothed from here on out. I know I scarred you for life back there.” She smiles as she scoots her socked feet under her legs and looks into the fire.
I remain quiet until the silence stretches long enough for her eyes to find mine over the crackling fire pit.
“Scarring me? Daisy, trust me. I have many feelings about what I saw back inside my house, but scarred, sure as hell ain’t one of them.”
The easy-going smile slips off her face as her cheeks turn rosy.
She turns her attention back to the fire.
“So, um, what now? I saw a pizza in the freezer. We could throw it in the oven. Unless you’re not hungry.
Although you’re always hungry. Not that it’s a bad thing.
You are still training like an athlete, and you… ”
She continues to ramble as I take a long pull of my beer, but my attention is shot when I notice her nipples are hard under her shirt. Fuck, she’s not wearing a bra.
It’s going to be a long fucking night.
I clear my throat. “Pizza sounds good. How about you get that going while I put out this fire? We can watch a movie while we eat. Sound like a plan?”
The relieved look on her face answers before she does.
“Perfect.” She stands, and I bite the inside of my cheek when she turns and looks around, most likely searching for something to tidy up like she usually does.
But all she’s doing is giving me a view of her ass in those curve-hugging leggings and bringing back the memory I will in fact never forget.
“Need any help putting out that fire before I go?” She smiles, knowing damn well she has no clue how to do so, but in true Daisy fashion, she would find a way if I actually needed help.
Little does she know that between her leggings and her thin T-shirt, she’s only stoking the fires of my desire for her, which is doing the exact opposite of helping.
“All good. Let me know if you need help with the oven.” I tip my beer in the direction of the house.
She rolls her eyes and smiles, then makes her way up the few steps onto the deck and finally inside my home.
I’ll have to wait a few minutes before I get to work on putting out this fire.
Because if I stand now and Daisy looks out here, she’ll know that I’m a terrible friend.
Because friends don’t get hard when told not to think of their friends’ naked bodies.
Or when thinking about how they’ll be alone under the same roof for the first time ever.
No, no they don’t.
So I sit back and allow myself to finally come to terms with the truth I’ve suppressed since the moment I laid eyes on Daisy.
I want to be much more than just her friend.