Chapter 10
Chapter
Ten
EAT, SLEEP AND brEATHE SHIT
“Oh my god! How can this kid still be shitting?!” Bella complains while holding her nose.
“It’s because I had that Indian takeaway. I told you the Balti would come firing out,” I defend.
“I thought you meant you! Not Hope. I mean Jesus, she is like a pooping Mr. Whippy machine!” Bella gags as I hand her the filled nappy sack.
“Is Bella a silly poop head? Yes she is!” I coo to Hope making her smile.
Hope is four months old now and I’m not going to lie, it’s been tough.
The sleepless nights and breast feeding is anything but easy.
I swear at one point I thought my nipple was being ripped off.
The pain is unreal but I powered through, and probably bought shares in an expensive nipple cream with the amount I’ve been using.
The door goes and Bella smiles and practically runs to the door. It’s her new boyfriend and the pair of them are sickening together being all over each other. “Hi Neve,” he greets as he walks in.
“Hey Doctor Phil,” I greet.
He sighs. “You don’t need to keep calling me Doctor,” he states, like he does every time I call him that.
“I know but you’ve had your hands inside my body after all, plus it sounds funny.” I shrug.
He shakes his head while smiling at Hope. Yes Bella got together with the doctor that performed my c-section. He is a nice guy and they are sickly cute together.
“We are heading off, are you sure you are going to be okay?” Bella asks.
“Yes of course, please piss off. Have a lovely time and bring me back a present,” I add.
Bella and Doctor Phil are off on their first weekend away together. I expect they won’t step out of the bedroom much, so if I do get a gift, I expect it to be the free hotel shower gel.
“Okay, let’s go! Bye Hope!” Bella calls out, blowing kisses at Hope as she leaves.
“Well kid, I guess it’s just you and me. You’ve done a poop so what else would you like to do today?” I ask Hope. The response I get is the sound of her filling up her nappy again. “Well, I guess that answers that question.” I sigh.
Idecided to take Hope for a walk in the park just down the road from us; the sun was shining and well, I needed to shift some of this baby weight.
Did I look like a bag of shit? Yes I did, I had on my comfy sweats, a baggy t-shirt which I am pretty sure hasn’t been washed in over a week and is currently decorated with sick and possible poop stains and my hair is piled in a messy bun on top of my head, not the cute purposefully messy buns girls wear.
It is just a mess. But I don’t care. I am currently surviving on a maximum of four hours sleep a night and holding my shit together pretty well considering.
I may have only had a hormonal meltdown once or twice since Hope has been born, so I was calling that a win.
I take a seat on a bench and close my eyes, enjoying the feel of the warm sun beaming down on my face.
“Neve?” a voice calls. I know immediately who it is, even though I am praying it isn’t him.
I open my eyes, yeah Dylan. Protectively I stand in front of the pram.
His eyes sweep my body and I don’t miss the look of disgust on his face. “Dylan,” I grit through my teeth.
“You er, look. Um.” He stutters.
“I look like shit Dylan. I know this there is no need for more bullshit,” I snap.
“More bullshit?” he questions.
I roll my eyes. “Yes more bullshit, like oh I don’t know, that you were staying in your brothers flat, or that you went away to sell some shit I don’t remember.
How about the truth – that you were in fact squatting there, and everything that came out of your mouth was a lie?
” I shout loudly which disturbs Hope, making her cry.
I turn and get her out of the pram to comfort her, not caring about Dylan or his reaction.
His eyes are wide and he looks like he’s seen a ghost. “Is that, is it mine?” he asks.
I stamp down my anger. “Yes she is yours and you would have known sooner if you didn’t fuck off leaving me no way of contacting you.” He runs his hands through his hair, his eyes darting around as if looking for an escape. “Calm yourself Dylan, I don’t expect or want anything from you,” I state.
He breathes a sigh of relief, which makes me even more pissed off. He should be honoured to have Hope in his life. “Thanks, I um, that’s great. I mean, I am just not in the right place you know. I don’t think I’m father material,” he rambles.
“Dylan!” a woman calls as she runs over in tight Lycra gym leggings and a cropped top that barely covered her plastic tits.
How do I know they’re plastic? Because the bitch is running and nothing is moving, not even the slightest jiggle.
She reaches him and he wraps his arm around her affectionately. “Hi, I’m Susie,” she greets.
“Hi,” I greet sharply, looking at Dylan with my best evil glare.
“Listen, we better go, lots to do,” Dylan rushes out awkwardly.
“Yeah we do, we have the wedding planner coming over at 4 pm,” Susie adds.
“Wedding planner?” I ask in disbelief. Even Dylan has the decency to wince.
I laugh and shake my head. “Fucking hell, well clearly you’re definitely not in the right place.
” Susie looks confused and Dylan looks like he wants the ground to swallow him up.
“You know what, I wish you all the best Susie.” I smile at her. “And Dylan, you can go fuck yourself.”