Chapter 14
S tretching back, Celina soaked up as much sun as she could without falling off her log seat. “Mmm.”
Laughing, Rodric joined her. “If you lean much farther, you’re going to topple into the mud.”
“Shh! Don’t speak or the rain will return. I’m enjoying the sunshine while it lasts.”
Sitting next to Rodric on their long midday break, she basked in the warm glow. It had taken her a full day to dry out their gear after the river adventure, and three more before she finally felt completely warm again. Most of the warmth came from spending a full day in the sun for the first time in a while, but a little of the glow came from the hunter next to her.
Rustling in the woods nearby made its way to her ears a full second after Rodric was up and moving into a protective stance. She startled, nearly falling off the log as she quickly swung back up from her sunshine acrobatics.
A familiar snicker filled the air. “You know, he’s right, you’re bound to end up in the mud.”
Shock nearly bowled Celina at the unexpected arrival. “Cass! What are you doing here? How did you find us?”
Her longtime friend was leaning forward on her horse a few feet into the clearing.
Her deep green shirt was belted and open from the waist down over fitted black pants. Dark and alluring, the outfit allowed for unhindered movement and a host of hidden weapons. The combination of colors made her brown eyes seem even darker than usual as they met Celina’s.
Hopping down, Cass walked over to them just as Rodric sheathed his knife.
Lithe, powerful, and slightly wild, Cass moved with a sharp vitality and speed seemingly at odds with the extreme stillness that allowed her to disappear into the background with ease. Her energy was quietly amused as she assessed Celina.
Raising one eyebrow, Cass lifted a finger in the air. “One—don’t insult me, you know I’m an excellent tracker. The hunter may be nearly a ghost in the woods, but you are not.” She raised another finger, lips twitching into a smirk. “Two—Sam was happy to point me after you. For some reason, he thinks you need a chaperone.”
Blushing slightly, Celina glared at her friend and made quick introductions between the warrior and the hunter.
“I presume you’ll be joining us the rest of the way then?” Rodric asked after greeting Cass.
“Yes.”
“Glad to have an extra sword if we run into trouble.”
“Only hunters are wild enough to travel during these storms.” Cass smirked. “But I’ve got you.”
Turning to Celina, she ran through how she’d come to join them, her annoyance at being left behind abundantly clear.
“You were on assignment, and it was urgent,” Celina defended.
“You really thought I wouldn’t come after you?” Cass asked.
“Of course, I just—”
“You could have left a note. Instead, I heard a wild story from Cat and had to strong-arm Morgan into providing more details.”
“You’re right, I’m sorry.” Celina hugged her friend. “Thank you for coming after us.”
“You’re welcome.”
“I’m sure Morgan was happy to send you after us.”
“Yes. Especially when I pointed out that it was in his best interest if a Calderran warrior—no offense to Rodric—was keeping tabs on the matriarch of the royal family. Eventually there will be questions for both you and Morgan.”
“That’s true.” She had been concerned with what trouble Morgan might get in for assisting them.
Choking sounds came from Rodric, his tanned face lightening as he paled.
“Whoa, you okay?” Celina patted him on the back.
“Did she just say royal ?”
Cass chuckled. “How did you not know?”
“No one referred to her by any title other than Lady Blackwood. The royal last name is Muir. How was I supposed to know?” Standing, he paced a few feet away before turning to stare at Celina with wide eyes. She stared back with surprise at the unexpected response.
“Blackwood is the family name of the royal bloodline,” Cass said helpfully. “Muir is the name taken by the reigning queen’s family while in rule. It helps keep things separate since power doesn’t pass directly to her daughter, but potentially to another female in the bloodline.”
“That is not common knowledge outside the realm.”
“Wait.” Celina grabbed his arm as he paced past her. “Rodric, is this going to be a problem?”
“I… no. I don’t know…”
Concern came to life inside her. She’d thought his resistance to magic would be their main challenge. Everyone knew her history and heritage at home. It hadn’t occurred to her that it would be difficult for him to accept.
“The line of succession works differently in Calderre.” She squeezed his arm. “Politically, I’m just a noble with a bit more responsibility. Relatively similar to a lord’s standing in Eldridge.”
A loud cough interrupted her.
Celina rolled her eyes. “Okay, maybe a little higher than that. But still, I’ll never be considered to rule. My standing as matriarch makes me ineligible.”
He gave her an incredulous look that implied her statement didn’t quell his concern, the opposite in fact. Smoothing a hand down his face, he visibly tried to calm his emotions. After a moment, he dropped a light kiss on her lips.
“I’m not running away,” he said, referencing his disappearing habit. “But I am going to need a few moments.” With that, he strode into the woods.
Zora pulled up from where she was grazing as Rodric stalked off. Giving a short, abrupt screech, she trotted after him, turning to glare at Celina on her way. Great. Even his horse is upset with me. The two were so connected, it was no surprise the sassy mare followed him as he went to process the revelation.
Cass snickered. “So, when are you planning on telling him Cat’s odds of becoming queen?”
“Oh, hush. Let him be.” Celina shook her head, eyeing her best friend as she moved into the seat Rodric had vacated. “Cat told you she’s becoming an aspirant?”
“After she explained about your interesting interaction with Commander Varice, yes. She needs a purpose, Celina. If that’s what it takes, so be it. You could take a lesson from her.”
“Excuse me?”
“You heard me.” Cass raised her brow in challenge in a way only a best friend could. “You’ve been drifting for years. I understand not wanting to follow your mother’s path, but you need to make a choice. Become a full-time healer. Join the new refugee program council. Don’t. But you need to make peace with whatever you decide.”
Resigned to the conversation, Celina shifted into a more comfortable position on the log. The problem remained that she didn’t know her own heart in the matter. “Did Althea talk to you?”
“Morgan, actually. He recognized your mother’s dagger.” Cass nodded meaningfully to the sheathed weapon on her hip. “Why did you bring it?”
She touched the haunting object. “I hoped it would give me strength. Direction, maybe.”
“And has it?”
“Not yet,” Celina sighed, meeting her friend’s gaze. “You really think I’m meant to be on that council?”
Her best friend looked away, her hair ruffling in the light breeze. “Do you know why I joined the Wolflumen?”
Cass was rarely, if ever, willing to delve into her past.
“To learn to fight. So you wouldn’t be vulnerable again,” Celina answered.
“I’d lost everything. You were busy raising Cat, learning to heal. Morgan had warrior training. My entire family was gone. I needed someplace to belong.”
“Did you find it?”
“In some ways.” Cass stretched her legs out in front of her before finally turning back to meet Celina’s gaze. “They gave me a purpose. One I’m committed to, would die for. Becoming one of them transformed me into who I am now. Having a purpose gave me something to fight for. It helped heal me. You need that too, whether you want to admit it or not.”
The truth hurt. Even from a loving source. Maybe especially, because she couldn’t just wave Cass off and ignore her insights. “You forged a new path. I can’t escape mine. Or, my mother’s, rather.”
“Focusing on healing isn’t going to bring your parents back or vanquish the grief. I think you know that. Otherwise, you would have committed to it already.”
Celina stood and paced away from Cass, unable to deny it. Healing didn’t fill the void in her soul like it did when she was younger, as she hoped it would continue to do. It had worked for a time, but every year she became more unsettled, like she wasn’t doing what she was meant to. Wasn’t where she belonged.
“I don’t know if I can handle being a councilor like her,” she admitted.
“You won’t know until you try. You’re already an advocate, whether you realize it or not. And the new council will be different from the one your mother led since it won’t be headed by the military, that’s the whole point. Who else is going to lead them and shepherd the changes needed? Think about it. If not you, someone else will step into your mother’s shoes, and they won’t do it with the same spirit you would.”
Althea had said much the same, but Celina had yet to admit her real fear. “What if I can’t live up to everything she was? She lived and died saving them.” As a leader, she could fail them all rather than just a single individual she was called upon to heal.
“No, she didn’t.”
The strength of the statement knocked her out of her fearful thoughts. “What?”
“You’re a healer, Celina, and you think like one. Davina was a warrior. Your mother died because some unscrupulous, immoral fools were hunting children, trying to enforce their own beliefs on the rest of us. She believed in a different world, like Cat does, and she fought every day to bring it into being. She died fighting for our safety, our right to practice magic, and our future, like Connor is willing to do.”
“I never thought about it like that.”
“Well, you wouldn’t… you weren’t born with a sword in your hand.”
Celina’s breath caught in her throat, and she swallowed hard, wiping tears from her eyes. “True.”
She’d been honest with Rodric when she’d confessed that being at the Refugee Center was the hardest. Her mother’s presence infused the place, and Celina wanted nothing more than to carry that piece of her mother’s heart. Her passion had grown far beyond healing, but so much was at stake. So many people who could suffer for her choices.
“You have the same fire in you, Celina. I know you do. Your siblings aren’t the only ones who carry her spirit. You can do it as a healer, but I think you’d make an amazing leader for the refugee program. So does Morgan.”
“You really talked to him about that?”
“Yes. For the record, though, he brought it up.” She raised her hands in an I’m innocent motion. “I was just coercing him into telling me where you’d headed. I told him to stay out of it and mind his own business. And that I’d talk to you.”
Could she do it? Anxiety rose like a feared thunderstorm as she considered it. She’d known for a while that something was missing. Was she really ready to step past the fear? She couldn’t devote her entirety to answering that question until Connor was safe. But she was running out of time to join the council if that was where she was really called to be.
“I’ll consider it when we get back home,” Celina promised.
Cass nodded solemnly, and Celina shook her head, offering her friend the truce of a smile.
“Why is it that you insist on giving me reality checks?”
“I’m the honest friend, remember?”
“Well, that’s true.” Her brutal honesty may be harsh at times, but she was always astute.
“Also, because no one else will, powerful royal matriarch that you are.”
“Right,” Celina said, bumping Cass’s shoulder.
“Seriously. You’re more intimidating than you realize. Just not with a sword.” Cass winked. “That’s what I’m here for.”
“Thanks. For the sword and the advice. I appreciate both.”
“I swear, if everyone would just listen to me…” Cass laughed when Celina tried to push her off the log into the mud, her balance and quick reflexes keeping her from falling.
C elina was studying the map when Rodric returned. Responsive to touch, detailed imagery grew from the page as she ran his fingers over a particular area, holding still briefly before falling back into flat ink.
Standing behind her, Rodric rubbed his hands over her arms and shoulders. “Of all the magic-related things I’ve had to come to terms with, this has to be my favorite.”
“Oh, really?”
“Yes. I use maps constantly, and I’ve never had one this… real. It’s incredibly intricate.” He hesitated a moment before continuing. “How does he do it?”
Her brows rose in surprise. It was the first time he’d broached the topic of magic without her nudging the conversation that direction. Maybe Zora had knocked some sense into him on their walk in the woods.
“From what I know, he takes samples of earth from the area he wants to map and uses them as a foundation to draw the surrounding land. You should ask him to explain it when we return.”
“Maybe I will.”
A slow smile spread across her face. Small steps.
“Celina, about earlier…” He moved her hair away and stroked her neck. “Your heritage won’t stop what we’re building between us.”
“I hope not. But you’re dealing with a lot.”
“Running is a very old, ingrained habit. But I’m not running from the one good thing I’ve found. You.”
“Rodric—”
He shook his head. “My issues are my own. I have some lingering anger against our rulers in Eldridge and the hand they played… still play… in the devastation being wrought, the damage to our families and our people. The community turned on us, but the rulers set the tone everyone follows. It just hit a sore spot I’d forgotten about.”
“The group your mother and sister were part of—did you ever discover who turned them in? Who set the fire?”
“No.” He clenched his jaw, but his fingers stayed gentle on her neck. “My father wasn’t willing to let our name be damaged more than it already had been. He refused to investigate. I was too young to pursue it on my own. The only people I could have gone to for help—the Zafars—were being hunted themselves.”
“Not all of them perished. Brenna won’t either. We’ll fight for her. So will Cass.”
Rodric smiled, gratitude etched into the lines of his face. “Thank you.” He brushed his lips against hers in a sweet kiss.
Letting go of the map, she threaded her fingers through his hair, pulling his head closer. Heat zapped up her spine as she deepened the kiss, arching her back to accommodate the acrobatics of kissing him upside down. He met her need with more fire, tangling their tongues as he chased after her.
“Don’t make me throw water on you two,” Cass threatened as she re-entered the clearing. “I’m sure I can find some. You were supposed to be tracking Connor.”
“Right.” Celina cleared her throat as she refocused on the discarded map. “Tracking.” She smoothed the map, trying to ignore the soft flutter that stayed with her as Rodric combed her hair back away from her face. “I think he’s this direction.”
“How sure are you?” Cass asked.
“It’s not exact. More a pull in the general direction. I’ll need to check frequently to correct our course as we go. At least once a day, maybe more as we get closer.”
Keeping one hand on the sensitive spot between her neck and shoulder, Rodric leaned over her to study the map. The touch heated her even through the heavy layers of clothing.
“That makes sense.” Cass ran her finger over the area bordering the edge of Barrett’s Forest. “Morgan was able to find out that they were ambushed in this area.”
Celina’s heart stopped and restarted, making her lightheaded. She knew she’d been right, but it still felt earth-shattering to hear confirmation that her brother had been in the area they were headed. The same area Brenna had disappeared from. “You’re sure?”
Cass nodded.
Fear reawakened, flooding her with new worry. Connor’s lifeforce had been thready and nearly indeterminable for a time, causing her days of panic. But it had been gaining in strength recently. He was alive, somewhere. Hopefully, hidden from his attackers, who might still be searching for him.
“Do Lightning Teams get ambushed often?” Rodric asked.
“Rarely,” Cass said. “Something unusual must have taken place to catch an entire team off guard like that.”
“I just hope Connor knows where they would have taken Brenna.”
“His team does reconnaissance, not rescue, which actually works in our favor. He’ll have the most up-to-date information on that.”
Celina prayed it was the truth. They were getting closer to their goal, yet each day intensified the worry that something would go wrong.