Chapter 15
TARA
I’d loaded some white chocolate brownies into the oven early on Monday morning and was starting on the scones when a knock on the café door made me jump. I went to investigate and was surprised to see Carly outside, grinning and waving at me.
‘Sorry to turn up so early,’ she said after I let her in, ‘but I have news.’
‘You’ve found a venue?’
Carly and Liam had spent yesterday travelling round various wedding venues in the area with four back-to-back venue appointments lined up.
‘Yes. We’ve gone for your favourite – Fallowfield Grange.’
‘Aw, I’m so pleased.’
Fallowfield Grange was a manor house turned hotel not far from where Jed’s parents lived.
I’d never been there myself but I’d heard positive reviews.
After the Bay Trade meeting last Monday, Carly had come back to The Chocolate Pot for a hot chocolate and had taken me through the shortlist of venues online.
I’d thought it looked more suited to her and Liam than some of the bigger, grander venues.
‘Have you set a date?’ I asked.
Carly bit her lip and scrunched up her nose. ‘Provisionally. It’s a bit earlier than planned. It’s this year.’
Following Liam’s proposal in November, they hadn’t particularly wanted a long engagement but they knew they wouldn’t have time to look at venues until now so had anticipated getting married in September next year.
‘They had a cancellation,’ Carly continued, ‘but it’s in May. On your birthday.’
‘The 4th?’
‘Yes.’
I grinned at her. ‘How generous of you both to put on such a huge birthday celebration for me.’
‘It doesn’t bother you?’
‘Should it? It’s not like I’ve ever done anything to celebrate my birthday – well, not until you and Maria did your scheming.’
After realising I’d let all my birthdays in Whitsborough Bay pass by unnoticed, Carly and Maria had worked together to throw me the most amazing ‘half-birthday’ when I hit thirty-six-and-a-half last November. It had been a special and emotional day which would stay with me forever.
‘I know, but didn’t you keep your birthday quiet because that’s when you found out the truth about Garth?’
The penny finally dropped around her worried expression.
‘Aw, Carly, you’re the sweetest but there’s honestly no need to worry about it.
It wasn’t on my actual birthday when I found out and, even if it had been, it would be something to celebrate because it freed me.
I struggle with New Year because that was the start of it all, but my birthday weekend was my escape from him.
Get that wedding date booked before someone else swoops in and grabs it. ’
Carly hugged me. ‘I’m so relieved it doesn’t upset you. I’d never have booked it if it had. So, a question for you – will you be one of my bridesmaids?’
‘Oh, my God! Really? I’d love to be.’ It was my turn to hug her. I’d never been a bridesmaid before and it would be an honour to have a key role during Carly and Liam’s special day.
‘Are you crying?’ Carly asked, looking at me with concern.
I wiped my eyes, laughing. ‘I promise they’re happy tears.
I’m so happy for you both and I’m just a bit emotional thinking about how much closer we’ve got over the past year thanks to you encouraging me to have courage.
I’m so grateful to you for being the catalyst for so much positive change in my life and now I get to be your bridesmaid. I hope you know how much I love you.’
‘Aw, bless you!’ She drew me into another hug. ‘I love you too and you’re the one who gave me the courage to tell Liam how I felt so you’ve changed my life too.’
I needed to continue making the scones so Carly followed me into the kitchen and told me more about their wedding plans while I worked – to have a civil ceremony, that Liam wouldn’t be wearing his army uniform as he didn’t feel it appropriate now that he was no longer a serving member of the armed forces, and that they wanted a traditional but relaxed day.
‘Bethany’s going to be chief bridesmaid,’ she said. ‘I was hers so she’d kill me if she wasn’t mine, but I had a bit of a dilemma over the others. You were a definite but I started thinking of my other friends – Sarah, Lily, Ginny, Jemma, Charlee, Skye…’
We knew Skye from Bay Trade and the others were all business owners on Castle Street.
‘…and it was in danger of getting out of hand so I decided to keep it simple with Bethany, you and Liam’s sister, Kim. She can’t come dress shopping with being all the way down in Exeter but she’s really chilled – says she’s happy to go with whatever colour and style we choose.’
‘And do you have any colours in mind?’
‘Not yet. With aiming for a September wedding, I was originally thinking autumnal colours but that won’t work for spring so I need a rethink. I’m going to ask Ginny if she’ll do us an evening appointment one day later this week or early next week.’
After she left, I couldn’t stop smiling.
Carly had been in love with Liam since senior school and it transpired that he’d felt the same but neither of them had wanted to risk damaging the friendship by saying anything.
After so many years of longing to be together, I wasn’t surprised that they’d jumped at the opportunity to take a cancellation.
How lovely to have a wedding to look forward to and how adorable was Carly for considering my feelings regarding the date?
Even if I had been triggered by my birthday, I wouldn’t have dreamed of allowing her to postpone things for me.
I was dying to share the news with Jed but I was already behind with my schedule and needed to crack on with my baking.
I’d let him know later. As I mixed the ingredients together for a chocolate cake, I tried to imagine the style of wedding gown Carly would choose but couldn’t call it, although I was fairly certain she’d stick with the traditional ivory.
As I poured the cake mixture into baking tins a little later, my thoughts turned to what I’d wear when Jed and I got married.
It’d need to be something completely different to the style I’d worn when I married Garth – perhaps even a coloured gown – and…
I gasped and stopped what I was doing as I registered my train of thought.
When Jed and I got married – not if but when – as though it was a foregone conclusion.
As I washed the mixing bowl, my mind raced.
I hadn’t thought about marrying again but my wedding to Garth hadn’t been the ceremony or location I wanted and the marriage had been a four-and-a-half-month disaster so I couldn’t help but feel I’d been cheated first time round.
I did want to do it again with the right person and I had no doubt in my mind about that person being Jed but would he want to marry again?
Like me, he was divorced and once down the aisle might be enough for him.
It was a huge thing but, just like having more children, was it too early to mention it?
Suddenly it felt as though we’d raced forward with declarations of love and intentions to be there for each other forever but without exploring any details about what that would look like.
Drying the bowl, another thought struck me.
At some point, we’d need to move in together and we hadn’t talked about that either.
I knew that Jed living with his parents was temporary and that living in the flat above the gallery had never been his intention because, with just two bedrooms, it wasn’t big enough for him, Erin and Lucy.
Presumably he’d planned to buy a house once he knew the gallery was financially viable.
Would he invite me to move in with him and the girls then?
I had no doubts about living with him but my stomach lurched at the thought of leaving my beautiful flat to do so.
I loved it here and it was so practical just to walk down two flights of stairs for the early-morning baking.
Having Jed and the girls move in with me would be my strong preference but it wasn’t an option.
The flat was open plan and would have to be completely reconfigured to make bedrooms for the girls, taking away all the character I loved.
I tutted to myself. When had I turned into such an overthinker?
I was confident that my relationship with Jed was the real thing and everlasting but there was no need for me to get all het up about living arrangements, marriage and babies so early on in our relationship.
Jed was nothing like Garth. Garth had manipulated and controlled every aspect of my life but Jed was the sort of man who discussed things first. He understood what compromise meant, as did I, and we’d find the path that was right for us together at the right time.