Chapter Thirteen
Hollis
T he crowd screams when I make my shot. Adrenaline races through my veins, chasing away every nervous or uneasy feeling. When I’m on the basketball court, I’m in my element. A few guys from the team slap my back in appreciation as they pass.
Not the Hornets.
Trey curls his lip up in disgust.
Cal’s nostrils flare.
Jordy shoots me glares filled with venom and hate.
Besides that, still feeling pretty good.
That is, until I catch Roan’s stare on the sidelines. He’s benched, just as he said, watching the game with furrowed brows and sadness gleaming in his eyes.
Someone from LHS rams into me, knocking me to a knee. Coach yells at me to pull my head out of my ass. Roan now smirks at me, satisfied.
Fucker.
“We wipe our asses with Horn River trash,” the Lebanon High kid mutters.
My eyes track the ball, ignoring this douchebag. He says something else, his attention diverted my way, and not on the play.
“And we embarrass Lebanon losers in front of all their friends and family,” I grunt as I dart around him, intercepting the ball that was meant for him.
The crowd screams again, numbing me with a pleasure you can only feel when everyone is rooting for your success. I storm down the court, sidestepping every LHS asshole along the way, before throwing the ball from the three-point line.
Swoosh!
Coach yells at me again, but this time he’s grinning. “Way to run the court, English!”
By half time, I’m starting to feel slightly woozy. The rush of adrenaline has sapped up the last of my energy. I knew I should have grabbed more than a protein shake. We’re all herded into the locker room so the cheerleaders can perform their halftime show. I get knocked along the wall a couple of times. Blindly, I reach out to steady myself. My palm wraps around Roan’s firm bicep.
Oh shit.
I should let go, but I can only stare at him, hating that he makes me feel even more lightheaded than before. He grips my wrist in a punishing hold, prying me from him. But, rather than letting go, he hauls me over to his locker.
“You’re going to pass out, rat,” he complains as he flings open his locker. “Coach won’t let me bail you out, so you’re going to have to figure your shit out and fast.”
Coach is rambling about kicking LHS’s ass, but I’m too focused on Roan to hear all the details of his gloating.
Roan pulls out a package of peanut butter crackers. My stomach recoils. His features darken when he notices my reaction. Before I can open my mouth to protest, he rips open the package and shoves a cracker at me.
“Eat this. Now.”
I shake my head. “I…”
“So help me, rat. Eat it or I’ll make you.”
Anger pulses deep inside me. It makes my gut clench hard and painfully like a fist. Rather than get into it with him, I snag the cracker and make a great, messy show of eating it. He smirks and hands me another one.
“Good little rodent.”
“Fuck off,” I grumble.
His eyes dart to my mouth, chasing away my irritation with a shot of heat. When he lifts his hand, I stop mid-chew. Oblivious to the chaos around us as Coach says something that makes everyone cheer, Roan lifts his thumb to my mouth. My breath catches in my throat.
“Crumbs.” He utters the word. I see it tumble past his lips more than I actually hear it over the noise. His thumb brushes along my bottom lip.
Time slows like molasses hanging thickly from an overturned jar.
The moment almost passes, but lingers.
Barely.
Seconds drag by, the heat of his thumb on my lip scarring me.
He pins me with a hot stare for what feels like an eternity. I’m no longer breathing. My heart doesn’t beat. I simply stare at him.
He kills the spell when he shoves the pack of crackers into my chest. “Eat so you don’t fuck up the game.”
With those words, he’s gone.
I’m left feeling even more fucked up than ever.
Why does Roan get inside me and strip me bare every damn time? Being so stupidly affected by him is becoming an issue. It’s overwhelming and exhausting.
And exhilarating.
Thrumming with adrenaline, this time the Roan induced kind, I run out of the locker room with the rest of the team to go kick some Lebanon loser ass.
“Keep kicking ass out there, English, and you might just lead this team to the state championship,” Coach says, slapping me on the back. “Awesome work out there.”
He turns to shower praise on a couple of other guys. I’m left grinning.
“You played so well!” Sidney exclaims as she bounds over to me. She throws her arms around my neck for a hug. “Ew, you stink.”
“I just ran my ass off,” I say with a chuckle, hugging her back. “You walked into this sweat trap.”
She pretends to look offended but makes no moves to peel herself from me. Gio walks up, winking at me.
“You two are so cute,” he teases, batting his lashes. “Future prom king and queen.”
“Pass,” I grumble.
Sidney pouts. “But we’d be such a cute couple.”
I manage to pull her away from me. “Yeah.”
“So convincing,” she groans. “Well, I can speak for everyone when I say we’d be adorable. Right, Gio? Back me up on this one.”
I smirk as he placates her in a teasing way. Gio clearly likes Sidney. From what I’ve gathered this week, she’s on a totally different social rung than him, but they get along great regardless. Maybe if she wasn’t so hell-bent on trying to date me, she’d give a guy like Gio a chance.
“Hello, Earth to new kid,” Sidney whines. “You’re always in your head. There’s a whole world out here with me in the center of it.”
Gio snorts. “Give him a break, Sid. He just scored most of the points for our team. I wouldn’t be surprised if he passed the hell out at any second.”
“Save the passing out for my tent later,” she whispers, fluttering her lashes at me. “You’re going, right? To Campfire Chaos? I’ve only begged all week.”
“I, uh,” I start but then snap my mouth shut when I feel an intense presence behind me.
“What’s happening?” Roan’s smooth rumble ripples down my spine and makes the hairs on my neck stand on end.
“We’re inviting Hollis to Campfire Chaos,” Sidney says bravely, staring past me with fiery challenge in her eyes.
“Me too,” Gio throws in. “Packaged deal.”
Sidney’s lips twitch. “Duh.”
“I don’t remember inviting the rat to the river,” Roan says in a menacing tone. “Do you?”
I don’t have to see them to feel three more guys flank Roan. Having them at my back makes me nervous, but knowing we’re in front of a shit ton of parents, students, and teachers helps.
“It’s fine,” I mutter.
Sidney’s face tightens with fury. She opens her mouth to speak when my mom pushes her way into the group to hug me.
“You did amazing, honey,” she praises, kissing my sweaty head. “I was so proud.”
I close my eyes, ignoring all the bullshit, and focus on my mom. So strong. So loving. So kind.
“Thanks, Mom.”
She pulls away to grin at everyone in the group. “Hi, Roan.” Her smile is sympathetic and motherly. Then, she regards the others. “I’m Kelsey.”
Roan sheds his asshole attitude and introduces his friends. Trey and Cal shake hands with my mother, both wearing matching good ol’ boy grins. Jordy grunts out a hello and manages to somewhat smile for her, which feels crazy to me since I’ve never seen him do it before. Gio hams it up for her when he introduces himself, making sure to kiss the back of her hand. I kick him in his ass, aiming for his balls, but he manages to thwart my attempt.
“I’m Sid. Hollis and I might go to prom together.”
Mom’s brows lift in amusement. She knows I’m not into Sid, but she plays along anyway. “That’s wonderful, sweetie.”
Sidney preens and then sidles up to my mother, her eyes flashing with victory. I don’t know what she thinks she’s won. That is, until she opens her mouth. “We invited Hollis to go camping with us. Cal’s dad owns a campground and in the winter, we basically have the place to ourselves. Everyone behaves. We cook hot dogs and tell ghost stories. Super fun and safe.”
Mom chuckles. “Wasn’t born yesterday. I know you’re giving me the G-rated version.”
Sidney’s face burns bright red. “I, uh, I…”
“It’s okay,” Mom assures her. “My son is eighteen. It’s good to see him going out and meeting new people. I trust you all to take care of him.” Her eyes settle on Roan, who’s now come to stand beside me, our shoulders brushing.
“I won’t be there.” His voice is gritty and raw. “I have to get back to Roux.”
Mom’s eyes light up. “About that. I was just coming over here to ask you if it would be okay for Roux to spend the night with us. She tells me you’re staying at the nice fireman’s house and that he lives close by. I promise we’ll take good care of her.” She reaches up and ruffles Roan’s hair. “I’ll take care of yours if you take care of mine.”
He’s stiff but when he catches sight of Roux and Charlotte talking nearby, his shoulders sag in defeat. “Okay.”
Jordy growls from behind me, but my mother doesn’t notice his rage.
“Wonderful. How about we all meet up at The Mushroom Hut? My treat. Everyone loves pizza, right?” Mom beams at us. “You boys better shower first, though.”
“We’ll totally be there, Mrs. English,” Sidney says, reaching over to take my hand. “Thanks for inviting us.”
“Right. Meet you there,” Roan grunts, pushing between Sidney and me, breaking our hands apart.
Mom tosses me a knowing wink, which I pretend I didn’t see. She has no idea how much this guy hates me. And she just invited all the Hornets for dinner. Fucking great.
“We’re almost there,” Sidney assures me and points. “Turn here.”
I’d wanted to drive alone, but Sidney hopped in my car when everyone left the pizza restaurant. The Hornets surprisingly hung out with Roux and Charlotte, ignoring us, while Sidney and Gio chattered my mom’s ear off. No fights broke out, so I consider dinner a success.
Even if I couldn’t stomach a single bite of the pizza.
I pull up to a snow-covered camp area, nestled in the woods, and shut off the car. Vehicles are parked already. It appears we’ve arrived later than most everyone. I’m about to open my door when Sidney runs her palm over my jean-clad thigh.
“I like your mom,” she says softly. “Much nicer than mine.”
“Thanks.”
Her palm slides higher. “We could be good together, you know. Really good.” She palms my cock through my jeans, making me hiss out.
Gripping her wrist, I pull it gently away. “No.”
Shock morphs her pretty features. Apparently Sidney isn’t used to being told no. For a brief moment, she seems tired. Used and abused and worn out. When she’s not smiling, she looks pretty fucking sad.
I hold her hand, threading my fingers with hers. “It’s not that kind of no. Not how you’re thinking. More like the fact that I couldn’t ever reciprocate.”
“I give good head,” she whispers. “I don’t need anything in return.”
“You should, Sidney,” I say firmly, pinning her with a hard stare. “You’re sweet and funny and fucking beautiful.”
Her lashes bat hard at her cheeks, but it’s because her eyes are watering and she’s trying desperately to hold back tears. “Why are you saying these things?” A tear leaks down her cheek.
I reach up and swipe it away. “Because they’re true. You’ll make some guy really happy. Just not this guy. And, for the love of God, stay away from the Hornets.”
“If I’m so funny and pretty, why doesn’t anyone want me?” Her bottom lip wobbles. “Not you. Not the Hornets.”
“I can’t speak for those assholes, though I’m almost positive it’s because they’re self-centered dickheads who only love themselves, but I can speak for me.” I give her a genuine smile. “Sid, I’m gay.”
She blinks at me as my words settle in. “What?”
“Gay. Not bi. Just gay. I like guys.”
“Oh.”
Leaning in, I kiss her wet cheek. “But if I were straight, you’d be my type. The serious girlfriend with marriage potential type. I hope you find someone who sees that because you deserve it.”
She hugs me and then cries softly into my neck. I stroke her silky hair, almost wishing I could be that person for her. I can barely be the person I need to be for me. Someone bangs on the window, making Sidney scream in surprise.
“Hey, lovebirds, save some kisses for me,” Gio says, pressing his mouth against the glass.
We both laugh at his antics.
“Yeah, yeah, we’re coming,” I grumble.
He walks off chuckling. I grab her hand and squeeze it.
“Listen,” I say with a sigh. “Since you’re my friend and all, I want to confide in you. While I’m gay, and I already came out in my old hometown, I’m not ready for that here. Not with the Hornets breathing down my neck and just getting on the basketball team. Can we keep it between us?”
“Can I at least tell Wendy? Gio? I need to tell someone. Please,” she begs. “You can’t give a girl such juicy information and tell her to zip her lips.”
“You can tell Gio,” I relent with a smile. “If you let him ask you out.”
She snorts. “Good one.”
“I’m being serious.”
“Have you seen him? He drives a van.”
“So?”
Her lips press together before she lets out a huff. “He’s Gio. I don’t know. I’m not attracted to him.”
“Because you’re attracted to assholes like the Hornets? How’s that working out for you?”
She rolls her eyes. “Ugh. They’re such dicks. Gio does make me laugh and he doesn’t ever try to stick his tongue down my throat or cop a feel.” Then, she stiffens. “What if he doesn’t want to ask me out?”
At this, I laugh. “Are you serious? That boy is obsessed with you. Show one ounce of interest and he’ll ask you out in a heartbeat.”
“Obsessed? Why? What did he say about me?”
I try to mimic Gio, which makes Sidney giggle. “She’s so sassy, Hollis. Her lips. Look at them. She’s running her head about the craziest shit and I can’t look away.”
“That asshole,” she shrieks, swatting at me. “I do not run my head.”
“You totally do, but it’s endearing.”
She lets out an exaggerated huff. “Fine.”
“Fine?”
“I won’t tell anyone but Gio and I’ll let him take me out if he asks.”
“He’ll ask.”