Chapter Nineteen
Hollis
I ’ve only ever been with one guy. Lucas. And he never looked at me the way Roan is looking at me right now.
His eyes are wide and trusting.
I can tell he’s nervous by the way he bites on one corner of his bottom lip, but he’s also aroused. The red blush on his cheeks and groans coming from him are evident of that. His taste is exactly how I’d imagined. Salty. Masculine. Unique. I’m going to suck him dry. Make him realize just what he’s been missing until he met me.
Taking him deeper in my throat, I make sure to keep my eyes locked on his golden-brown ones. With my wet fingertip, I tease at the puckered hole of his ass. He clenches, fear shining in his eyes.
I pull off his dick and smile. “I’m going to put my finger inside you.”
“Well, do it already.”
He’s grumpy because he’s afraid.
“Demanding,” I tease, licking at his tip. “I’m in charge right now. So lie there and hush.”
His scowl is somewhat playful until I take him deep into my throat. As soon as his hips thrust up, I push into his body. He lets out a string of strangled curse words, his ass tight around my finger. Slowly, I ease into him, seeking out his prostate. I know the moment I touch it because he cries out. Such a sweet, vulnerable sound from a hard, often mean boy.
My name is whimpered on his lips as his salty cum shoots abruptly into my mouth. I keep massaging his prostate until his dick ceases twitching, swallowing down each jet of cum. His hips stop flexing up and he lets out a ragged breath. I slip off his dick and grin.
“What do you think?” I waggle my brows at him.
He grabs my biceps and hauls me up to his mouth. His tongue is curious and probing as he kisses me, tasting his remnants on my tongue. We grind together as we kiss. He grows hard again, which feels good against my dick.
“Hollis,” he murmurs, fingers biting into my hips to urge me to move against him. “I like this. I like you.”
I nip at his bottom lip. “Me too.”
His dick is hot and still slick from my mouth, so it feels really damn good rubbing against it. The sounds coming from him are erotic and ones I want on repeat in my head. It only takes a few moments of our desperate kissing and rubbing for us both to come. We soak Roan’s chest, which makes him laugh.
“What sort of fucked up shit have you pulled me into?” he teases, his eyes hooded and smile lazy.
I relax against him, not at all concerned about the cum that’s slick between our chests. “You started it.”
“Me?” he scoffs. “I was fine until you rolled up being all peppy and shit.”
“Someone has to be the happy to your grumpy. Jordy sure as hell isn’t.”
His brows furl. “He’s going through some shit. Friday was…it won’t happen again.” His fingers stroke through my sweaty hair.
“I sure as hell hope not,” I mutter. “That river was fucking cold.”
“He’s stressed and overprotective of Roux and me. His lines got blurred.” His amber eyes sear into mine. “It’s not an excuse, just a reason. I’ll do a better job of keeping him in check.”
“He still hates me. You saw how he was at school today.”
“Jordy hates everyone pretty much.”
“Well, he’s going to have to get over his hate toward me,” I tell him with a grumble. “You’re mine now and he’s bound to learn that sooner or later.”
“Yours?” Roan laughs. “I barely know you and now you’re claiming me?”
“That’s my cum all over your stomach and I did just suck you dry.” I smirk at him. “By definition, I think I’ve claimed you properly.”
My phone starts ringing in my jeans, effectively killing the moment. He frowns as he watches me bolt to answer it.
“Hello?”
“Did you get lost?” Mom asks.
“Studying. Roan and I had an assignment due and he didn’t finish his.”
“Hey now,” he groans, tossing a pillow at me.
Mom, having heard him, chuckles. “Glad you’re having fun, but you should probably let them get to bed. It is a school night.”
I roll my eyes. “Sure thing. I’ll be home in a few.”
After hanging up, I let my eyes rake over Roan’s naked, muscular form. He looks like a Roman god sprawled out on his bed. A statue sculpted from granite painted to look real. His dick is flaccid but still fucking beautiful as it lies on his lower stomach that’s still wet from our cum. His bicep muscle bulges when he bends his arm and lays his head on it. I want to lick him. I want to crawl up his body and lick every salty inch. Even his armpit. The dark hair there is masculine, and I bet smells uniquely him.
He’s an addiction I’ll never break.
My stomach tightens with nerves and I tear my eyes from his. It’s going to kill me. Wanting him. Caring for him. Being with him. I feel it in my bones. The bed squeaks and then he pads over to me, a towel in his hand. He cleans me off and then himself before tossing it to the floor. It’s still damp, probably from his morning shower.
“You okay?” His voice is gritty and rough. Worried.
I tilt my head up to look at him. “Yeah.”
He grips my jaw and kisses me softly. “Just because I don’t want to talk about this thing between us to the school and everyone else for Roux’s sake doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy every second of it.”
“I get it.” And I do. I really do. It still stings, especially after Lucas and everything with my dad.
He pulls me to him for a hug. Being naked in his arms feels so damn right. “I’ll make it up to you.”
“How’s that?”
“I’ll take you out.”
My head snaps up to look at him. “Like on a date?”
“Don’t guys date?” he asks, frowning.
“I guess. I mean, I’d like that.” I chew on my bottom lip for a second. “Lucas and I never went on a date.”
His eyes flash with anger. “Lucas is a dumbass. I’m taking you out like he should have.”
“How come you never took Sidney out?”
He steps back and glowers at me before tossing my clothes at me. Pain stabs inside my stomach at his sudden mood change.
Why did I ask him that?
Because we’re in a relationship that involves dates. I thought we could talk about everything. Quickly, I dress while he puts on a pair of gray sweats and nothing else. If I weren’t feeling unwanted at the moment, I’d most definitely attack him with my mouth for looking like such a goddamn snack.
“Right, so bye,” I grit out, turning my back on him.
He stalks over to me, his arms going around my middle. I’m pulled against his chest as he nuzzles his nose in my hair.
“I don’t date. The girls I’ve been with were just for a night of fun. I didn’t like them. Not like I like you.”
Oh.
So I’m special to him.
That most certainly takes away the sting.
“I wasn’t trying to piss you off,” I tell him, my hands resting on his that are holding on to me. “She’s my friend and she’s got some self-esteem issues. I was just wondering.”
“I know.” He sighs. “I’m not used to this. Opening up to people. Jordy and the guys know me best, but even then, we don’t just openly talk about our feelings often. I feel…exposed.”
“Whatever we talk about is ours,” I murmur. “I’m safe to talk to.”
He twists me around and pins me to the door with his hips. In way of apology, he kisses me until I’m dizzy. It takes another worried phone call from Mom to tear us apart for good.
“Call me,” he growls. “When you get home. So I know you made it safe.”
I smirk at him. “You still owe me a breathy phone call. You couldn’t get out of that, even if you tried.”
“Go before I drag you back to my bed.”
“Don’t threaten me with a good time.”
His warning glare sends me on my way with a chuckle.
“What are you doing?”
Roan lets out a heavy sigh over the phone that goes straight to my dick. “Trying to figure out what to make besides grilled cheese. I’ve been told I’m a lame ass cook.”
“I know it’s not tutoring day with my aunt, but you could always come over here.”
“I wish,” he murmurs, “but I already promised the guys we’d hang out tonight. I need to check in on Jordy.”
It’s been three days since I blew him in his bed, and it’s been strained ever since. Not between us. The hiding. I can tell, at school, he wants to haul me to him, but he always refrains from doing what we both want. Plus, he’s worried about his best friend. Jordy hates me, so it’s not like I can even chill with them. So, for the time being, Roan and I have to keep our relationship a secret, even hiding it from his friends.
“I miss you,” I state, hating the whine in my voice. We’ve stolen kisses in the bathroom at school, and at my house on Wednesday when he and Roux were there. But other than that, we haven’t had another opportunity alone.
“Are you coming to Campfire Chaos tomorrow night?”
“I don’t want to.”
“I won’t let him hurt you. I swear, Hollis.”
I believe him. I would just rather have him to myself. If we go there, we’ll be separated. I’ll go off with Sidney and Gio while he and the Hornets hang together. It’ll be torture watching him all night and not getting to touch him.
“I know. We’ll see.”
“I can already tell when you’re pouting,” he teases.
“To be honest, I don’t want to see you all night and not get to touch you.”
“Who says you couldn’t touch me?”
“You’ll be with the Hornets.”
“So? You don’t think I’m going to tuck in early and drag you back to my tent?”
“How romantic.”
He laughs and the sound warms my heart. “Of course the first guy I decide to hook up with is high-maintenance as fuck.”
“Ha. Ha. Ha,” I deadpan. “And maybe I’ll be the only guy you ever decide to hook up with. I’m kind of a big deal. You won’t ever find anyone like me again.”
He’s quiet for a moment, which makes my nerves go haywire. My stomach aches something fierce until he gives me a reprieve, gifting me with a gravelly response.
“The only guy,” he confirms. “Come Friday night and then Saturday night we’ll go out just the two of us.”
“You play dirty.”
“The only way to play. Dirty is fun.”
“Fiiiiiiine,” I drawl out. “I’ll go, but if I end up in the river again, you owe me more than a date.”
“Hollis,” he growls. “You’re not going back in that river and Jordy won’t touch a hair on your goddamn head. I swear to you.”
I’m about to throw back a teasing remark when my phone beeps. Incoming call. From Dad.
“Fuck,” I mutter.
“What?”
“My dad is trying to reach me.”
“Your dad’s a real asshole, huh?”
“Yep.”
“So’s mine.”
He doesn’t give up much on his personal life, so when he does, I’m like a kid on Christmas morning, eager to open the present to learn more about him.
“I don’t know if your aunt told you, but my dad’s in prison.” His voice grows cold. “At least when he was around, Mom gave a shit.”
“I’m sorry.”
“It is what it is. We were given shitty dads. It’s our duty in life not to turn out like them.”
My dad may not be in prison, but he destroyed his son with his cruel, callous words and ability to cut me off based on my sexuality.
“My dad hates my being gay so much, he didn’t just give me up,” I say with a ragged sigh. “He gave them up. How could he do that to them?”
“And to you. To all of you, Hollis. Not just them.”
Tears burn at my eyes. I feel like I’m going to throw up, just like I always do when I think about my dad and what he did because of me. “I hate him.” And I hate how my voice cracks with emotion. That Dad still hurts me every day and he’s not even here.
“I hate mine too. At least your mom’s cool as shit.”
“Your mom is a bitch. You and Roux deserve someone who cares.”
“I’m okay,” he murmurs, his voice devoid of emotion. “It’s Roux I worry about.”
“Roux has you,” I remind him. “Better than your shitty parents combined.”
The line grows quiet, both of us lost in thought.
“You’ll have fun tonight with the guys,” I say. “They probably miss you.”
“I wish it were you coming over instead.” Big, mean Roan is pouting and I love it.
“Me too.”
“This weekend is all about us,” he tells me in a fierce tone. “I’m going to suck on your neck until it’s nice and purple, so no other fuck faces like Tyler Cuntingham will even think about flirting with you.”
Cunningham was flirting with me?
I think back to basketball practice this afternoon. He was being extra friendly, but I didn’t think he’d been flirting.
“Someone’s jealous,” I taunt, laughing at him.
“I’m not jealous.”
“You totally are. This is hilarious. Is he going to be at Campfire Chaos?”
“It’ll be his ass that ends up in the river,” Roan grumbles.
Liar.
He’s not like his psycho best friend.
“It’s cute you’re jealous.” I love poking this bear.
“Not jealous, rat.”
“Totally are, rat lover.”
“Don’t call me that.” His voice is filled with amusement and then it fades. “Dammit. They’re here. Tomorrow night. And if Cuntingham so much as looks at you at the game tomorrow, I’m tripping him. He can fall on his fucking face for all I care. Coach can kick me out of the game.”
“You’re so precious,” I tease. “Defending my honor.”
“Bye, fucker.”
“Bye, hero.”
He mumbles out a “fuck you” before hanging up.
My heart skips several times.
Roan Hirsch is jealous. Because he likes me. Really likes me. He’s possessive and doesn’t want other guys looking my way. I haven’t felt so overjoyed in as far back as I can remember. I’m still grinning when my phone rings.
Dad.
He sucks the joy right from me.