Chapter Eighteen
Roan
J ordy shoots me a sour look on the way to the parking lot, but doesn’t fight me. I told him I was hitching a ride with Hollis since we’re going to the same place. He didn’t want to give in. I could tell. But then Juno called.
I wanted to ask him what Juno wanted.
Instead, I gave him a look that said, “Be careful.”
Charlotte and Roux are sitting on the hood of Hollis’s Mustang talking to that damn boy again. As soon as Jordy sees him, he starts stalking toward him rather than his Explorer. The kid—Kayden—freezes when he sees all that wrath directed at him.
Jordy is like trying to tame a pissed off bull.
Impossible.
“Hey, Roux,” Jordy says, his voice a growl. “I’m leaving.”
Roux frowns, looking over at me before nodding at Jordy. “Okay. Bye.”
Kayden takes a few steps back, wise to put space between him and the bull.
“See you in the morning.” Jordy pulls her to him for a side hug. “You call me if anyone’s a dick to you.” He makes a point at glowering at Kayden. “Got it, Little Hornet?”
Her face is red from embarrassment. She likes this kid and Jordy is even more overbearing than me. “Yeah, fine. See ya.”
Jordy smirks at the kid and then fist bumps me on the way to his car. Hollis comes up behind me, hitting the fob on his Mustang.
“My car’s not a bench,” Hollis gripes.
Charlotte rolls her eyes at her brother. “Don’t be lame.”
Kayden snorts, but all it takes is a venomous look from me to have the kid retreating. “See you guys tomorrow.” He waves and then turns to take off trotting. Dumbass lanky motherfucker.
The girls pile into the backseat and I sit shotgun. Hollis fires up the engine. He fumbles with the music before turning on something I don’t recognize. It’s catchy, though. I like it. The girls must know it because they start singing along.
For so long I’ve been wound up so tight I sometimes think I might snap. But right here, in this moment, I feel relaxed. Freed. Like a teenager enjoying himself, not worrying about adult shit like custody of his sister or where his next meal will come from. I wish I were free enough to reach over the console and give Hollis’s muscular thigh a squeeze. To thank him for showing up and fucking shit up.
He shoots me a curious glance. I smile and wink at him. His pallid cheeks flood with color. I like when I turn the porcelain boy a pretty pink. It looks good on him. Makes him look alive. I especially like the purple hickey visible on his neck.
I gave him that mark.
Me.
A possessive part of me gets a thrill at seeing it. All through basketball practice, I kept staring at it. It took everything in me not to get a fucking hard-on. Coach was already annoyed with my playing. The last thing I needed was to give him something else to lose his head about.
When the girls start whispering about Kayden, I turn up the music to feign disinterest when really I’m listening hard.
“He likes you,” Charlotte murmurs.
“No,” Roux hisses. “He likes you.”
“No, dummy, he likes you. Have you seen how he smiles at you?”
Roux giggles. “I don’t think so.”
“I know so,” Charlotte argues.
“Shh,” Roux gripes.
They lower their voices. Even though I don’t care for this dipshit boy, I’m thankful for Charlotte. She’s the best thing to happen to Roux. My sister is coming out of her shell and laughs a whole lot more.
When I glance over at Hollis, a warm feeling washes over me. Maybe it’s not just Charlotte changing things around here. Maybe it’s her brother too.
He flashes me a wicked grin that sends heat burning straight down to my dick.
Fuck if I don’t feel thankful for him too.
This is torture.
I thought I’d get Hollis up in the attic alone with me and I don’t know…suck his face off. But his aunt has decided to come up here and nose around in the boxes. He keeps smirking at me, which only serves to make my dick even harder.
My life is chaos at the moment, and I don’t even care because this thing with Hollis is addictive. I want to explore it and see where it goes. It sucks I have to be careful, though. With Roux, I always have to be careful. I don’t ever want to do anything to fuck things up for us.
“I think that’s enough for one night, boys,” Ms. Frazier says. “The meatloaf should almost be done. Wash up and come on down.”
I’m already prowling Hollis’s way before she even makes it down the ladder. What stops me, though, is the sour look on his face. My hands grip his hips because I need to touch him, but I don’t kiss him like I want to.
“What’s wrong? Are you sick?” I demand, my eyes roaming over his features, looking for tells.
Dark bags under his eyes.
Pasty skin.
Trembling.
“Sit down,” I instruct, pulling him down to the attic floor.
We sit cross-legged and facing each other. His hands are shaking. I take them both in mine. He has smaller hands than me, but they’re still masculine. If you told me two weeks ago I’d be holding hands with a guy, I would’ve fucking laughed. Now, it just feels right.
“What’s going on with you?” My words crack with emotion.
He scowls. I don’t know why he’s so damn defensive about this shit.
“Nothing.”
“If you tell me nothing one more time, I’m going to drag you out back and beat you.” I give him a wide, wicked smile.
He rolls his eyes. “It’s fine. I just…certain foods make me sick.”
“Like?”
“Meatloaf,” he snaps angrily.
“So why do you eat it?”
“I don’t.”
“Why don’t you eat something else?”
He shrugs. “I don’t like to make waves. Mom and Aunt Karen are doing the best they can.”
“What foods don’t hurt?”
“Blander ones. It’s not a big deal.”
“Hollis, it is a big deal. You barely fucking eat. I’ve known you a little over a week and I’ve seen you consume less than I do in a day. It’s not healthy. Have you seen a doctor?”
“My dad is a doctor. I’m fine.”
God, he’s so damn stubborn.
“Come on.” I rise and help him to his feet. Our lips meet for a frenzied kiss, but someone hollering from downstairs has us reluctantly breaking apart. I go first down the ladder so I can catch his woozy ass if he passes out. Thankfully, it doesn’t come to that.
We head downstairs and I watch Hollis. He nearly turns green when he looks at the meatloaf. It’s a little chaotic as everyone loads food on their plates. Hollis piles on the mashed potatoes and green beans and then takes the thinnest slice of meatloaf known to man.
No one notices.
He hides his issues in plain sight.
The girls—Roux and Charlotte—are too into each other while Penny is obsessed with her iPad. Karen and Kelsey are busy with asking everyone about their day. No one notices Hollis. No one but me.
I sit beside him and squeeze his thigh under the table. When no one’s looking, I steal his tiny slab of meatloaf because he makes a face every time he looks at it. Once it’s on my plate, his shoulders relax and he mutters out a thanks.
“How are you liking work?” Hollis asks Kelsey. “Your boss still annoying?”
“Yes. Totally. But I made a friend named Beth. She’s like my chosen mom. Not by blood, but she’s just good people. Even lets me call her Momma Beth.” Kelsey chuckles. “Everyone needs a mom like her.”
“So she’s old?” Hollis teases.
“Hush you,” Kelsey says with a smile. “She’s a grandma. Has like nine grandkids and one on the way. Some of them are the girls’ ages.”
Penny perks up. “Can they come over?”
“Maybe one day. I don’t want to seem like a freak latching onto this woman, but I swear if she wasn’t there, I would’ve quit already. She keeps me sane and hooks me up with good romances. We’ve even gone to lunch a couple of times.”
“You look happy, Mom,” Hollis says. “I’m glad.”
They share a long, heavy look filled with love and I’m jealous. I’ve never had anyone look at me like that before.
And then it happens.
Her gaze turns my way and it’s still filled with pride and affection. “What about you, honey? Things better with Mike? Are you guys happy?”
“I, uh, yeah. We’re good.”
Her blond brow hikes up. “I can tell when I’m being avoided. Is he good to you? He doesn’t hurt you, does he?”
“Nah,” I say with a chuckle. “I could take Mike. He’s great.”
This relaxes Kelsey and she nods. “Good. Maybe we ought to invite him to supper on Wednesday. If there’s anything we can do to help make the transition easier, I want to help.”
“We don’t need help,” I bite out sharply.
Roux glowers at me. “Roan!”
Kelsey simply shakes her head. “Tough luck, kiddo. In this family, you don’t get a choice. We help whether you like it or not. Right, Hollis?”
He smirks at me. “Yep.”
It’s then I realize where he got his annoying do-gooder attitude. Hell, even Ms. Frazier is that way, offering to let me do jobs here to get tutoring for Roux. They’re all so nice. It’s a little jarring considering I haven’t been exposed to anything good in regard to family.
Roux is once again all smiles as she tells Kelsey about a test she aced. Kelsey and Karen both praise her. It warms me to my fucking soul to see Roux getting the attention she deserves.
It’s gonna hurt when all this goes away.
Good things always go away.
At least in Roux’s and my life they do.
“Hop in the shower. You smell like a barnyard animal,” I instruct Roux once we walk into our living room of our garage apartment.
“Punk,” Roux says with a huff. She obeys, though, and bounds off toward her room.
Fuck, she has a room.
I’m still blown away by that fact.
“I guess I’ll go,” Hollis murmurs from behind me. His mom asked if he’d run us home and he happily obliged. I was glad when she told Charlotte she couldn’t come along. I’d wanted a second alone with Hollis.
“I thought you were going to help me study,” I blurt out. “I mean, I don’t want to study, but you said I should.”
He chuckles, the sound deep and throaty. It makes my dick twitch. “You don’t want to study. But, yes, I think you should.” He kicks off his shoes and then plops down on the couch.
I find my backpack and pull out my homework assignment. Rather than make out, like I’d rather do, Hollis jumps right in and starts explaining the assignment to me. I like his voice, so I get lost in what he says. We’ve worked through nearly all the problems by the time Roux gets her ass out of the shower and comes to say good night. The last three problems are torture, but I pay extra attention so we can get finished and move on to other things.
“See, not so diffic—”
His words are cut off when I attack him with a kiss. He smiles against my lips and allows me to ease him down onto the sofa. I kiss him hard and eagerly, making sure to grind my hard dick against his. It escalates until we’re both breathy and stifling moans.
“Want to continue this in the bedroom?” I whisper against his lips.
His fingers slide into my hair. “You can’t fuck me tonight.”
I guess I hadn’t thought about fucking, but now that he’s suggested it, I want it. I’d just wanted to undress more and not worry about Roux coming in.
“Why not?” I challenge, because I live to fuck with him.
“Because it’s been a while since Lucas. And he was my first and only. We just need to…prepare.”
“Just fuck me then,” I offer, though I’m pretty sure that will hurt like hell.
His blue eyes flash with barely contained hungry lust. “You’re definitely not ready. Maybe one day we’ll get there.” He rewards me with an evil grin that makes my dick pulse. “I could suck you off, though.”
Holy fuck.
I’ve had my dick sucked plenty of times, but never by a guy. And never by someone who looks like they’d blow their load just for a taste. It’s a temptation I can’t ignore.
“Let’s go,” I growl out as I stand, pulling him up with me.
He bites back a laugh as I haul him to my room with me. As soon as I get the door closed and locked, I’m on him. I start tugging at his clothes, eager to see him naked. He’s just as greedy, ripping off my hoodie and shirt all at once. His fingertips slide down my abs, making me shiver, and then he’s frantically working at my belt. The moment his hands shove down my boxers, I lose all sense of reality.
I want him.
I want him so fucking bad.
“Lie down.” His voice is commanding and deep. Fuck if I don’t want to obey.
Dropping onto the bed on my back, I stare up at him, my dick weeping for attention and hard as stone. He pushes down his own boxers and fists his impressive cock. The sight of him is such a fucking turn on. Sure, he’s lean because he never eats a goddamn thing, but he’s also muscular from basketball. His chest hair is sparing and golden. It’s darker blond around his dick. I want to bury my nose there and inhale him.
What the hell has gotten into me?
Have I been into guys all along?
Is that why girls are just fucking meh to me?
All this time I thought I was broken inside. That I couldn’t love properly or be interested in another person. Truth is, I’ve been looking at the wrong sex. Because when I look at Hollis, I crave him like nothing I’ve ever wanted before. My mouth waters and my dick throbs. For him. Just a taste. To feel his skin on mine. Whatever he gives me.
“I like the reversal of power,” he says with a wicked glint in his blue eyes as he kneels on the bed.
“You’re the one who’s gonna suck my dick,” I tease back.
His smile becomes predatory. “You have a lot to learn, man. When your dick is in my mouth, I’m in charge.”
He spreads my thighs, making me feel ridiculously exposed. His eyes take in my twitching dick, heavy balls, and now my ass. A smile tugs at one side of his lips.
“You just going to look at it all day or do something about it?” I challenge, hating the bout of nerves that have suddenly consumed me.
His gaze softens as he grips my dick. “If you don’t like it or want to stop, just tell me. I won’t force you.”
Now I feel like an asshole.
I reach forward and run my thumb over his mouth. “I want it. I’m just…fuck, I’m nervous, okay?”
He bends, his blue eyes locking on mine. “I’ll take care of you.” With those words, he flicks out his pink tongue and licks the tip of my dick. I suck in a sharp breath of air.
“Holy fuck.”
He grins before taking me into his mouth. I’m staring down at a guy as he bobs up and down my length with better skills than any girl I’ve been with. My fingers latch onto his hair and I try desperately not to fuck his mouth. When he massages my balls, I nearly lose it.
“Jesus, Hollis,” I hiss out. “You’re going to kill me.”
He pops off and then sucks on his middle finger. “I’m about to. This shit will blow your mind.”