Chapter 4 #2
He could throttle Emmett for sticking his nose into things. He could also kiss him for it. If Benji had shown up while he and Van were getting down, things could have gone a whole lot worse.
Worse than breaking up?
Joshua: If it helps, we broke up.
Van’s next reply took longer: Why?
Joshua: Complicated. I’d like to talk to you about it. Need an unbiased, outside opinion on everything that’s happened.
Van: No other friends?
Joshua: Sadly no. My friends are Benji’s friends. I’m a recovering workaholic badly in need of making my own friends. Interested?
Van’s reply was an address and 3:00 p.m. Joshua put the address into his GPS. Not too far, maybe a few blocks. Van hadn’t outright said, “Yeah, sure, let’s be buddies,” but this was a start. A chance to meet and talk, without a bar top between them.
Despite the connection he’d felt with Van during that initial handshake, Joshua’s breakup with Benji was still painfully fresh, and he truly wanted nothing more out of Van than friendship.
And with his declaration of Joshua’s love life as “too complicated,” he was fairly certain Van was on the same page.
He hoped.
“For a man who avoids complications like the plague, you’re seriously about to step into someone else’s complicated love life?
On purpose?” Melody Thompson asked. She had enough sass in her voice to make Van stop and listen, rather than dismiss her objections.
He adored his temporary roommate for her blunt nature and big heart, but sometimes both things got her in trouble.
“I’m not stepping into his love life,” Van said. He kind of regretted ever mentioning his aborted Thursday night hookup, and he definitely regretted mentioning who he’d started texting with obsessively during their shared Saturday morning brunch. Then she’d started reading over his shoulder.
“Meeting to talk about it is definitely stepping into it. You’re inviting him willingly into your personal space to chat about his ex-boyfriend.”
“Aren’t you the one always haranguing me about making friends? You and Bea both.”
“We harangue because we love you.” Melody settled into her own chair at the small dinette in Van’s apartment, then scooped more fruit salad onto her plate. “And speaking of loving you, you have been such a good influence on me since I started staying here. I never used to eat this good.”
Van snickered. “It’s called clean eating, Mel. Everyone should try it.” He ate another spoonful of his hemp milk-soaked muesli, then made obnoxious lip-smacking noises that had her laughing.
“I still can’t believe you drive two hours to a grocery store every month. You’re nuts.”
“I don’t trust the Internet, and I wouldn’t have to drive two hours if there was a Whole Foods closer.
” He pointed at her plate of Ezekiel Bread toast with fresh strawberry spread and side of fruit salad.
“You complimented me on getting you to eat better, and now you’re making fun of my shopping habits? ” He pretended to sulk.
Melody rolled her eyes. “Yes. I am.”
“Whatever. Eat my food, sleep on my sofa bed, make fun of me. I see how it is.”
“Your sofa bed is hard.”
Van laughed out loud at her deadpan delivery.
They had a version of this conversation every other day, just like they had in the month and a half since Melody ditched her old place and started camping out at his.
She’d been too scared to live there anymore after a date didn’t like the word no, beat her up, and then dropped her off at the old motel where she rented a room.
She was terrified he’d come back and actually kill her, and Van wanted her safe.
They hadn’t been friends very long, but he had a difficult time trusting other people enough to let them into his life, so he cherished the few friends he had.
He’d kill to protect her from anyone who meant her harm.
His place was tiny, one of three apartments carved out of the second floor of a four-story beach house that had been converted back in the seventies, but he was happy to have her.
She speared a piece of cut apple. “So back to this Joshua guy. Why do you care so much? You flirted for like two minutes.”
Van couldn’t explain it to himself, much less to Melody.
He’d felt something strange with Joshua, a connection he rarely had with other people.
Joshua had a take-charge nature that appealed to him.
He wanted Van, and he wasn’t subtle about saying so.
He’d just forgotten to mention a very big detail: boyfriend.
Ex-boyfriend. Whatever.
“Who says I care?” Van said, going for flip instead of honest. “Maybe I still want to get into his pants, and now that the boyfriend is an ex, all systems are go.”
“Except you aren’t that kind of asshole.”
No, he wasn’t. As attracted as he was to Joshua, he’d go and do what he’d agreed to do, which was try and be an unbiased sounding board for Joshua’s relationship issues. Hands off. No significant looks. Light flirting only.
Except that ass, walking away in those jeans.
No. No hot ass. Talking only.
“It’s also a good thing you aren’t that kind of asshole,” Melody added.
“Yeah, I’m a real stand up guy.”
“You’re kind, Van. People don’t get enough credit for being kind.”
Van didn’t think he was particularly kind, but he also tended to be his own worst critic.
Never good enough, always trying to make up for the mistakes of his youth.
Awful, life-changing mistakes he’d never truly reconciled with his present.
Ignoring that part of his life was easier than trying to unpack all of it.
“You keep calling me kind, and I’ll make you start paying rent,” Van said.
Melody saluted him with her fork and kept eating.
After brunch was cleaned up, he had time to kill before meeting Joshua.
He settled in with his tablet to binge a few more episodes of Glee.
Old high school-based television shows weren’t usually his thing, but Melody had turned him onto the show, and now he was addicted.
Plus, the songs were awesome and the eye candy was a nice bonus.
He might have liked school more if he’d had a Mr. Shue.
They were meeting at one of Van’s favorite local hangouts—a dark, dingy hole in the wall that served the best raw oysters in town.
The rainbow flag above the door always made him feel welcome.
He arrived a little early and told Jen, the purple-haired hostess, that someone was meeting him before settling into a booth near the back.
The place only had six booths, four tables, and one long bar, and he’d once seen a fire code capacity of sixty.
He fucking loved odd little joints like this. It was why he loved Off Beat so much.
A boy wearing tight jeans under his green apron sauntered over to take his order. Van put in for a platter of oysters and a seltzer water with two lemon slices. This wasn’t a date, so Joshua could order whatever he wanted when he arrived.
His seltzer appeared first. A few minutes after three, tall, dark, and handsome strode into the place.
Joshua’s laser-focused gaze found him right away, and Van kind of hated how his heart gave a little kick.
Joshua sauntered over, hands inside of khaki shorts that showed off toned legs dusted with the same dark hair as on his head.
“I think I’m a few minutes late,” Joshua said as he slid into the booth opposite Van. “The entrance was tricky to find.”
“Keeps the tourists out.” Van used enough inflection to indicate he lumped Joshua into that tourist category, and it wasn’t a compliment. Might as well set the tone.
Joshua seemed totally unruffled, despite the general puffiness around his eyes. “So, I take it you know the place. What do you recommend?”
“I always get the raw oysters. I don’t know their supplier, but they’re the best oysters you can get that you didn’t harvest yourself.”
Joshua pulled a face. “No thanks. I don’t do raw fish.”
“No? You seem like a sushi kind of guy to me.”
“I’ve tried different kinds without the raw fish, but sushi doesn’t do it for me.” Joshua shrugged.
Van was usually good at figuring people out. Good bartending skill. “So what are you into?”
Joshua’s lips twitched at the intentional phrasing. “Nothing too crazy, but nothing too boring, either.”
“Try the beer-battered fish sandwich.”
“Sounds closer to boring.”
Van tugged the menu out of reach, then grinned. “Wait until you taste it.”
“Fine. Challenge accepted.”
When the waiter returned with Van’s oysters, Joshua ordered the sandwich, as well as two Cap and Cokes. At Van’s raised eyebrows, Joshua shrugged. “It’s been a fucking shitty two days.”
“Right. We are here to talk about that.” Van squeezed a bit of lemon juice over an oyster, then slid it down the hatch. Salty-sea perfection.
Joshua grimaced. “Look, I’m sorry I didn’t mention Benji the other night. Our agreement is—was once and done with other people, no repeats. Most of the time, it doesn’t come up with a guy or girl. We have sex and then go our separate ways.”
“Guy or girl?”
“Bi guy here.” Joshua’s frown deepened, as if expecting Van to make an issue of it.
Van shrugged. “Pan guy here, nice to meet you.”
Joshua visibly relaxed into the booth. “Anyway, it’s been that way since Benji and I started dating, and so far it’s worked.
At least, I thought it was working. It’s not like I was hooking up every other day.
Once or twice a month, maybe, especially if we were apart for a long time.
Obviously you know Ben is a musician, and I traveled all over for my job, so it left us free to get off when we were apart. ”
Van ate another oyster, surprisingly intrigued by these details of Joshua’s love life. “You said you thought the agreement was working?”
“Yeah.” His two drinks arrived, and Joshua took a long gulp from one glass. “Don’t judge me, I walked here.”
“Sitting here not judging.”
“Sorry.”
“Dude, you’re the one who’s had a major emotional crisis this weekend, not me. Drink away.”