Chapter 16
Chapter Sixteen
“You’re a virgin?”
Jake couldn’t believe what he was hearing out of this gorgeous, kickass woman’s mouth. His dick had gone rock hard. He was trying to deal with it, but the idea that no man had ever touched her….
Christ.
She shifted on her feet, clearly uncomfortable. “Well… yes. I know that’s hard to believe. But it’s the truth.”
It was hard to believe—and yet he didn’t doubt her. “I believe you… But why, Eva? Why didn’t you ever find anyone you could be with?”
She let out a breath. “Do you mind if I put my jeans on. I can’t very well stand here and talk to you about this subject while half-naked.”
Probably a good idea since he was fighting a monster hard-on. He got to his feet and handed her the blanket he’d been using. “Here, put this around you. Unless you want your jeans.”
She took the blanket and wrapped it around her body. “This is good. Thanks.”
“You’re welcome.”
She let out a breath. “I don’t think not finding anyone was on purpose, really.
It’s just… After Heather died, my mother got sick.
It wasn’t a sickness that should have killed her, but I think she lost the will to live.
Just stayed in bed and wouldn’t get out of it except to go to the bathroom.
She lay there for months, barely eating, refusing to go out.
And then one morning she was gone. Just like that.
I went to check on her, and she was dead. Her heart gave out.”
Jesus. “I’m really sorry, Eva.”
He didn’t know what it was like to lose a parent. He knew what it was not to have any parents in the first place, to be shuttled through the foster care system until you just didn’t care about anything anymore.
It was how the Brothers got their hooks in him. They’d seemed to care about him when nobody else had. They’d given him a sense of family and belonging that had always been missing. It hadn’t been real, though.
“Thank you. I appreciate that.” She was silent a moment.
“After she died, I was alone. Well, my aunt and uncle were still around, but I was eighteen. I kept seeing Brandon and the Brothers ride through town, kept thinking how Mama and Heather would still be alive if not for them—and I made a plan. I decided to turn myself into the kind of woman who could get close to them. And not just close, but someone they would value in their own way. Someone they wouldn’t view as a complete outsider.
Maybe fucking my way in would have been easier.
But I couldn’t do it. I did think about it, not gonna lie.
But my skin crawled and I felt like I’d puke if I went through with it.
I didn’t want any of them to touch me. Ever. ”
“And you were so focused on what you needed to do to get inside that you didn’t spend any time having fun or being yourself.”
She nodded. “Right. There was no time for men. What was I supposed to do? Date some guy and then disappear when it was time to make my move on the club? That wasn’t going to happen.
Besides, it takes time to get good at tattooing.
I spent years studying with some of the best. I came back to town six months ago and I’ve been working since. ”
Jake could only admire her. She stunned him.
Eva Gray had the mindset it took to be a Special Ops warrior.
Give her some training and focus, and he had no doubt she’d conquer the challenge.
That was the kind of single-minded purpose you wanted in an operator.
Someone who kept her eyes on the goal and didn’t let anything get between her and accomplishing it.
“Damn, Eva. Who knew all that grit was lurking under those glasses and shy smile of Evelyn’s, huh?”
She laughed. “No one, apparently. Not even me. Sometimes I thought it was impossible. But I kept going anyway.”
“I remember you said you wanted to be an interior designer once. Do you still want to do that?”
She shrugged. “Maybe. But I like tattooing. I didn’t know I would when I started, but I really do.
I love doing a tattoo for someone and then they’re so stoked to wear it.
They go away with my art on their bodies.
I love that.” She sighed and he heard the sadness in it.
“I’ve lost my portfolio and machines. I can replace the machines and ink—but all the pictures of what I’ve done, the sketches. I can’t replace those.”
It wasn’t an important thing when lives were at stake, and yet he understood what she must be feeling to lose something valuable to her. “It’s not over yet, honey. Don’t give up hope.”
“It’s silly, right? They’re just pictures, and this is so much more important. But I feel like my life is in there, like it’s the story of me. I guess that doesn’t make a lot of sense.”
“It makes sense.” Because the story of him was told in the missions he’d been on, in the camaraderie with his team, and in the knowledge that he made a difference in this world. That he hadn’t turned into a waste of space after all.
“Thanks for understanding.” She unwrapped the blanket from her body and handed it to him. He tried not to look down at her legs, at the dark vee of pubic hair behind her white panties, or the curves of her waist and high mounds of her breasts. Now was not the time.
But his dick ached and his gut churned and he wanted so much to reach out and touch her. He wouldn’t, but he wanted to.
“I think I should try to sleep now,” she said. “Who knows what tomorrow will bring, right?”
Despite himself, he caught her hand and pressed a kiss to the back of it before letting her go. “You’re right. You’re also pretty amazing, you know. Get some sleep, beautiful.”
She hesitated for a moment—and then she stood on tiptoe and pressed a kiss to his cheek. “You’re pretty amazing yourself, Jake Ryan.”
She marched into the bedroom, closing the door behind her. He lay down on the couch and pulled the blanket up. The blanket that now smelled like her.
Yeah, it was gonna be a long-ass night.