Chapter 33
Chapter Thirty-Three
Eclipsis
HAEL
Another two days had passed and every night I found myself at the cabin.
I shouldn’t be doing this. I should have stayed away the moment I brought her here, but I couldn’t. There was a tangible string between us, I could feel it now. Every time I left, it tugged tighter and tighter, pulling me back to her.
“Hi.” Her voice was soft the moment I opened the door. She was sitting on the couch again, her knees curled into her chest with a plate of cheese and fruit across her lap.
“Hey,” I said, closing the door at my back before unsheathing my sword, then the rest of my blades followed. The only one I kept on me was my dagger. “I’ll make you something.”
I propped my sword against the wood before walking into the kitchen.
“I have food,” she said, still not moving from the sofa.
“That doesn’t count as dinner.” I was very aware that she wasn’t eating proper meals. I had the icebox stocked before I brought her here and so far only the bread, fruits, and cheeses were taken.
She didn’t even go for the dried meats I prepared—I knew there was a possibility she didn’t know how to cook. Most of the people that lived in Moriann didn’t have a home, so I prepared some food for her, hoping she’d eat it.
It was only confirmation of my suspicion.
Nollie didn’t say anything as I started to cook, and I lost myself in the mindless task. Besides riding Aura, it was the only thing I enjoyed doing.
It brought me back to my childhood. Having no parents, I had to learn early to fend for myself.
Jaxs was the only person who talked to me prior to the Vargothi—before I fought, the entire village was convinced I was an outcast, that I wasn’t drakin.
It wasn’t until my Vinculum manifested that the rumors were finally put to rest. Everyone knew exactly where they came from, except for me.
I didn’t say anything else as I started cutting into the vegetables, and Nollie didn’t either, but I could feel her watching me.
“It’s ready,” I called, setting two bowls onto the table. Steam wafted around the kitchen, filling the air with the scent of spices.
I watched as she dragged herself from the sofa and sat down at the kitchen table before I realized I needed to do the same.
She filled a spoonful, pulling some carrots and potatoes into her mouth, and moaned. “It’s delicious. What is it?”
“It’s a boil,” I said, trying my best to ignore the sounds she was making, focusing on my own serving.
“There’s no meat in here,” she said after two more bites.
“I know.” I rolled my shoulders. “I left it out. You never ate any during the dinners with Elion, and you didn’t touch the dried meat I prepared…” My voice trailed off once I realized she set her spoon down and was staring at me, her mouth hanging open.
“I can quickly add some to the recipe,” I added. I would prefer it. I loved meat and the flavors weren’t the same without it. “It won’t take long.”
“No, no—this is perfect.” She picked her spoon back up. “Thank you.”
“Are you cold?” I asked. “I can start a fire.”
The cabin was warm, but somehow Nollie always wanted more heat. Ever since I brought her here, I barely saw her without a blanket wrapped around her shoulders, and even at Elion’s castle, she opted for clothing that didn’t quite fit the season.
“Yes, thank you.”
She grabbed the woven blanket that was draped over the sofa before sinking into the cushions.
I bent over the fireplace, stifling a wince as it pulled at my back.
Elion was furious when he found out Nollie was gone.
He didn’t want anyone knowing that she slipped through his fingers, so he made my punishment private.
But those were always worse than public ones.
He didn’t have to stop at ten lashes. He could do whatever the fuck he wanted.
“Where does Aura go when you’re apart?” she asked.
I turned to look at her just as the flames sparked to life.
“The dragon grounds are close to MonClem,” I said, walking toward the opposite end of the sofa. I knew I should leave, I shouldn’t sit down. I checked on her, I fed her, and now I needed to get the hell out of here. “She normally goes there, but she’s by one of the northern peaks while I’m here.”
“Can you not be far away from her?” she asked.
“Distance doesn’t affect anything for us.”
“Really?”
“Riders that have the Nullus bond tend to not separate as much,” I told her, knowing that Aura and I only could because of our Plenus.
I had my own magic, separate from being able to use hers.
She permanently gave me a piece of it during the formation of our bond, and although the pull to hers was still there, Aura gave me more than enough that I rarely had to use it.
“That’s because the rider can only use the dragon’s magic while with their dragon for the Nullus, right?”
I nodded.
“So why is Aura staying close?”
“In case I need to get back to the castle.”
“How does it work?”
“How does what work?”
“Everything. The bond. Can you talk to each other?”
“Not exactly. It’s more like a sense.”
“What do you mean?”
I laughed. “If you’re going to ask me a million questions again, you’ll have to answer some of mine too.”
She tucked her arms under her chest, pulling the blanket tighter around her. “Fine.”
“When you’re bonded, a dragon can fully read the rider’s mind.
All we have to do is think something and they’ll know, but it only works one way.
Riders get a sense of what their dragon wants, but it’s more feelings than actual words.
I can’t read Aura’s mind like she can mine, but I get an overall sense of her.
If she’s happy, mad, not trusting something.
The longer the bond, the better riders get at picking up on their dragon’s wants and needs. ”
She nodded, her head giving way under the firelight, reflecting off a thin scar cut horizontally across her neck. “How did you get that?” I asked, gesturing to it.
Nollie’s hand instinctively went up to cover it. She swallowed, her throat bobbing across her palm. “I made the mistake of taking a piece of bread out by one of the bridges in Moriann once.”
I went deathly quiet as I listened to her. She never opened up about her life in Moriann, and most of the time, I was too scared to ask. I didn’t want to rip open wounds she wasn’t ready to face.
“You mentioned before that all riders have wells,” she said, changing the subject, and I knew I wasn’t going to get more information about what happened. “Do dragons have the same well?”
“For Nullus and Semis bonds, yes,” I answered. “Only Plenus bonds work differently. I still get to pull from my dragon’s well, but I have my own too.”
“And do you know when it’s gone?”
I nodded. It was mandatory training Elion made us all do, and I fucking hated it.
Not that learning burnout wasn’t important, but his tactics for finding it were barbaric.
He didn’t care that it hurt our dragons, that it left everyone in the camp vulnerable.
“It’s called the burnout,” I said. “Every rider is trained to feel their own dragon’s bond when it’s gone. ”
“And what happens when you reach burnout?”
“Dragons go back to their home. If their well is at zero, it makes them fragile. If they pull past their well, they can die. Fleeing is their instinct to protect themselves. They come back to their riders once it starts refilling.”
“And what about your well? Will you die if you go past yours?”
“No. I physically can’t go past it. There’s just nothing to pull from once it’s gone. The only thing a rider can do is pull from their dragon, but they don’t do it when the magic is gone because it kills them.”
“Can a rider repeat the Vargothi, can they rebond with another dragon if that happens?”
I shook my head. “No. A bond is for life. You only get one dragon. What do you love?” I asked, taking my turn. I had a million questions I wanted to ask her, but I knew I had to take it slow.
“What do I love?” she repeated the question. “What do you mean?”
“What are your hobbies? What brings you joy?”
“I—” She started, then stopped. “I don’t know anymore. I used to love the ocean and just watching the waves crash against the shore was my favorite thing,” she said, “but barely anything you do in Moriann is for enjoyment. Every move is calculated.”
My jaw ground against my teeth as I had to fight to school my features.
Every time she mentioned Moriann, I hated it more and more.
Whatever she went through, whatever was haunting her past, I was going to change it.
I was going to make sure she could live for enjoyment, that she could figure out what makes her happy for no other reason than joy.
“Why did you try to get Jaxs to bring me here?”
I leaned back against the cushions, spreading my legs into a more comfortable position. “Two reasons,” I said, stifling a wince from the pressure on my back. “I wanted to get you out of there as soon as possible, and I couldn’t get to you until later.”
“And the second reason?” she asked, her voice barely audible.
“This,” I answered honestly. “I was terrified of this, terrified of what would happen if I spent more time with you. I can’t—” I paused. “I can’t control myself around you.”
My lips parted as she stared at me. I knew I should tell her, tell her why I was feeling this connection, why I swore she was starting to feel it too.
We had the Eclipsis Bond. They were so rare, supposedly extinct since the war, that I didn’t believe it at first. It wasn’t until Aura let Nollie ride on her back that I couldn’t deny it anymore.
Dragons only flew their rider and their mate—but mates weren’t a thing anymore.
Drakins and Wielders weren’t allowed to be together, not in any marital sense. Elion made sure of it, made laws that prohibited any sort of meaningful relationship between our two kinds by creating the Imassura.
I flew to Ryaranthia after I brought Nollie into MonClem, after Aura let her on her back. They had the world’s biggest library there, and being in Third Province, Elion didn’t visit enough to restrict the texts.
I still had to use my invisibility, still had to break into the section that wasn’t open to the public. It took hours before I found a single mention of Eclipsis.
Just one page, half torn. But it was enough for me to realize that the mating bond was supposed to be a blessing from all the Goddesses and Gods. It was the only time the Suns and Moons came together in unison.
And the last documented case was before the War of Two Kings.
And the part of the page that was ripped, the tiny glimpse I saw before the paper ended... it documented how to seal the bond.
“I should go,” I said, forcing myself to stand.
I didn’t trust myself enough to not want to finalize it.
This was dangerous.
I brought Nollie here to keep her safe, and if I forced a bond on her that she knew nothing about, it would only make her more of a target.
She called after me, but I kept walking and didn’t stop.
Not that it mattered. I knew I’d be back, knew I was too fucking weak, because the second I stepped out of the cabin, that string connecting us tugged tighter and tighter, wrapping around my lungs until I couldn’t breathe.