Chapter 20
AREK
I stare at my phone, waiting for Kylen’s text. It’s not like I won’t know the moment he’s assigned a room. I will. I didn’t ask for those notifications to be turned off.
The idea that maybe he’ll forget to text me sits heavily in my gut. He won’t. I know that.
When I suggested we go back to Hush Anonymous this weekend for a little fun in the dark, I had something specific in mind.
Kylen struggles with exploration when he can see that I see him, even though I think he knows I’m not judging him at all.
Attention on him—even my attention—makes him self-conscious to the point where he doesn’t want to move.
I’m hoping that he’ll be able to explore a little more comfortably in the dark. Maybe he won’t be able to see where he’s touching, but he’ll be able to touch without hindrance because I can’t see him.
His text lights up my screen a second before the notification.
Kylen Whitaker
White
Van Doren
Kylen White 12:49
My shoulders relax. Clicking my screen off, I let it fall into my pocket and open the door to the middle foyer. The door to the right is where the next wave of men is gathered. I can hear their voices as they chat. The door to my left is the entrance to Hush Anonymous.
As I’m waiting there, Galen—one of the new pledges last year—joins me in the foyer. He stops short when he sees me and then smiles. “Hey, Van Doren.”
“Galen,” I return.
“Haven’t seen you here in a while.” He leans against the wall across from me.
“We’re taking it back to the basics. Reignite the flame and all that trash.”
He laughs. “Kylen’s here, huh?”
I nod. “Yep. Don’t take the white ribbon.”
Galen waves his hand. “No problem. You can go first.”
I was here first, so I was going to go first anyway. I will lose my shit if someone enters Kylen’s room, and it’s not me.
“Your first time here?” I ask.
“I’ve done Hush but not Hush Anonymous. I’m here for curiosity more than anything. The guy I partnered with on Hush says that HA is even more intense and, admittedly, I got curious.”
“It is,” I agree. “Removing your sense of sight means that your other senses are heightened, and you don’t realize how much sight plays into sex until it’s removed.”
“Huh,” Galen says thoughtfully. “I guess I hadn’t thought of that.”
“You don’t know where their hands are going. You don’t know how big their dick is. You can’t guess their intent because you can’t see their eyes.” I shrug.
A smile climbs his face. “You’re selling me.”
The door opens, and he shrugs off the wall. Toby is at the door, not looking the least bit surprised to see me. “Van Doren,” he greets before I manage to flash my Hush card at him. It’s not like he doesn’t know who I am.
“Toby,” I return.
Instead of offering me the basket, he hands me the key with the white ribbon before gesturing for me to go down the hall. Behind me, Galen laughs quietly. I’m kind of bypassing the purpose of HA. Whatever. I paid the fee for using the room.
Toby changes the red light to white long enough that I can see that the ribbon on the door is white before it turns red again. I unlock the door without another word passing between us and enter the room where I know Kylen waits for me. Naked. Spread out.
I’d already been half hard in anticipation of our meeting, but knowing that he’s waiting for me has my dick filling the rest of the way.
The door closes quietly behind me, and I reach blindly beside the door to find the hook for the key.
As always, I close my eyes to allow them time to adjust to the darkness of the room.
I can hear Kylen breathing. Even though he knows it’s me, I can practically feel his nervous energy vibrating in the air.
After a minute has passed, I open my eyes and familiarize myself with the illuminated dim lines throughout the room, noting where furniture is and its shape as I strip out of my clothes.
The only difference between this time and all the others is that I don’t grab supplies from the nightstand before climbing onto the bed. I told Kylen we should come back here for a little more exploration in the comfort of the dark, but I didn’t expand on what I had in mind.
As soon as my hand wraps around his wrist, Kylen lets out a breath in relief.
I slide my hand over his familiar soft skin, letting my pinky brush the head of his dick and enjoying his quiet gasp in response.
It’s just a small touch. Could be considered accidental.
I don’t linger. My hand continues up his smooth skin, feeling the way his muscles dance and tremble beneath my touch.
His heart jumps roughly in his chest. His Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows when I wrap my hand around his throat and give him a little squeeze.
Then my hand cups his face, thumb brushing his lips, his jaw, and down his trachea. Once again, Kylen sighs.
“Little kit,” I murmur before pressing my mouth to his, bringing my body down on his.
Kylen moans into my mouth, his legs wrapping around my waist as I settle our cocks together. For many long minutes, we kiss deeply, hungrily. Messily.
“You’re not fingering me,” he complains when I finally bring my mouth along his neck.
I grin. “I have something else in mind for today.”
“What’s that?”
With my arm securely around his waist, I roll us until our positions are reversed. Kylen laughs at the way we rolled.
“It’s not new for me to ride you,” he says.
I wouldn’t go so far as to say it’s old news, either. He likes riding, but it’s still too overwhelming for him to truly enjoy it. More often than not, he ends up collapsed on my chest while I fuck us both into orgasms.
“Today, you’re in charge. Touch me anywhere. Put your mouth anywhere. Put your dick anywhere. Put my hands, mouth, or dick anywhere.”
Kylen holds his breath. “What am I supposed to do?” he asks quietly.
“Whatever you want. That’s the point. In the dark, I can’t watch you and make you nervous.”
“I—but… I don’t know what to do.”
I slide my hands up his bare back until I can frame his face again. “Whatever you want,” I repeat. “There’s no right or wrong answer.”
Kylen shivers and presses his mouth to mine.
For a long time, he does nothing but kiss me.
After a while, I release his face and slide my hands along his thin frame, touching the places that I always mark him with bruises.
I glide my fingertips along the globes of his ass and down the backs of his thighs until I reach his knees.
Then I remove my hands entirely so he doesn’t feel like I’m pushing him in one direction or another.
He kisses me a little more fiercely. A little more desperately. Maybe a bit hysterical. I can practically taste his fear. His nerves and anxiety.
When he needs a breath, he lets his face rest in my neck, his lips along my collarbone. “What do you like?” he whispers after a while.
“There isn’t much I don’t like, and I doubt you’re going to even think of one of those. Don’t overthink, little kit. Touch my body. See what you like.”
He remains on top of me for a long time, his fingers touching my sides gently.
Kylen isn’t shy about touching me, but it’s always PG.
His arms wrap around me—my waist, my neck, my arm.
He only touches my dick when I have him ride me, and even then, it’s only long enough to stand me up into position.
The way his cheeks flame as red as a lobster in those moments tells me enough that I think I understand. Kylen has no confidence in touching someone else. I don’t think he has confidence in touching himself.
Kylen practically slinks off my body so he’s at my side, pressed against me, his leg still over mine. His head rests on my shoulder, and I wrap my arm around his lower back, making sure he feels secure and safe but not guiding him in one direction or another.
His hand shakes as he moves it over my chest. I feel the way it skims my pectorals.
He jerks when his fingers touch a nipple, and I smile into the dark.
He avoids my nipples for a while as he traces the shapes of my pecs, running his fingers along my sternum, pausing to feel the steady rhythm of my heart.
I think the even pattern calms him a bit. His muscles relax as he presses his hand to my heartbeat. I’m not sure it offers him confidence, but his hand slowly slides to my nipple, and his fingers play over it.
The way he touches me makes me wonder if he’s touched one at all. Including his own. In the dark, where I can’t see his face, I can imagine what he’s feeling better than I can when I see his expressions. Facial cues that I rarely read correctly.
His touch is a little jerky, stiff. He moves his finger around it before adding another and moving my pebbling nip between them. My dick jumps at his touch. My pulse picks up slightly. I’m not sure if he wants to feel my arousal or if that will interrupt his exploration, so I don’t say anything.
Kylen spends a lot of time on my nipples before his hand moves over my ribs. He shifts against me, pressing a soft kiss to my shoulder while his hand continues to smooth over my torso. It slows when he feels the hair trail on my stomach, and his fingers move through it.
With the way he’s pressed against me, I can feel his breath. I hear the hitch in his breathing when his fingers move through the hair there. He likes it. He finds it attractive.
I love that.
His wrist brushes the head of my dick, and he jerks his hand away. Then he releases a quiet, nervous laugh and apologizes.
“Stop saying you’re sorry,” I answer, pressing a kiss to the top of his head. “Not a single moment that you’ve apologized for requires an apology from you.”
He buries his face into my chest, but in the dark, he doesn’t know exactly where his face is, and his mouth touches my nipple. Once again, my cock twitches in excitement. His hot breath along the sensitive pebble has me struggling to lie still for him.
I don’t manage to hold the sounds in completely when his tongue flickers out of his mouth and over my nipple. My arm tightens momentarily around his waist before I force myself to relax and let him do whatever he wants without leading him.
That doesn’t mean he’s not paying attention. He isn’t an oblivious man. He heard and felt the way I enjoyed that. I’m really fucking proud of him when he licks my nipple again. Tentatively. Then he hesitantly does so a third time, more purposefully.
I’m not sure when he went from timidly licking my nipple to sucking on it, but I’m suddenly moaning under him and reach for my cock to give it a stroke before I can stop myself. Something Kylen must have felt because his hand moves along my arm and down to where I’m grasping my dick.
I still my hand as his fingers trace the shape of it. His mouth remains on my nipple, sometimes sucking and sometimes just there. As if his brain can’t concentrate on the two separate actions of his mouth and hand.
A thick bead of precum sits on my head, and I swipe it away with my thumb. His fingers trace the movement, and I struggle to swallow my moan. I don’t succeed completely, and Kylen shivers. Maybe he needs to hear how much he turns me on. Even from the littlest touch of his hand sliding over my slit.
Closing my eyes, I gently pull my hand from under his touch and remove it from my dick entirely. Kylen’s hand replaces it and tightens around my length. He gives an experimental squeeze and I grunt, dick jumping again.
His hand moves along my length in exploration while his mouth hovers over my nipple, loose, hot breath brushing the sensitive peak, and his tongue periodically flicking over it.
My hips jerk when he gives me a strong stroke. I force my body still as he continues to move his hand along my length. This is going to be a long test of my endurance. My discipline. A very long lesson in edging.
But it’s worth the struggle because the longer I lay open for him, Kylen gains confidence.
His touch becomes a little more sure. His mouth on my nipple becomes more purposeful.
I don’t think he’s doing anything with the intention of getting me off.
No, he’s learning what turns me on. He’s learning what feels good, what I feel like, and how to move around my body.
His hand dips down to my balls, and he spends a lot of time there. Playing with them. Squeezing them gently. Tugging on them a little more firmly. Moving them in his palm. His fingers press to my taint, and the groan I let out is far louder than anything I’ve filled the room with at this point.
I’m practically vibrating when his mouth moves from my nipple and down my stomach. He barely touches my frenulum with the tip of his tongue, and my cock weeps for him as I gasp. My hand is off the bed, nearly meeting the back of his head when I freeze.
No, Kylen has an issue with dicks and mouths. With dicks in general. I won’t do anything at all to make him feel forced to continue.
It takes an act of all the gods who may have existed at one point to force me to put both my hands behind my head while Kylen teaches himself how to lick and suck my dick. My balls. Bury is face between my legs until I’m fucking panting.
By the time the buzzer sounds, making Kylen practically jerk himself off the bed entirely before I catch him, I’m a shaking mess and need to get off.
“I want you to breed me,” he pants against my mouth.
We don’t have time for that, though. “Get dressed. Back to my room. I’ll breed you there.”
Kylen nods and stumbles from the bed as I do.
I’m fucking throbbing as I pull my clothes over me.
He practically runs from the room, and I only give him a ninety-second head start before I follow.
I catch him on the stairs to the third floor, sweep him off his feet, and race the rest of the way to my room, where I lock us in for the rest of the afternoon.