Chapter Three
Raven
My body turns into a statue as I gape at the guy standing a short distance away from me.
Kylen wears an unsure smile as his eyes take me in, starting at my hair that’s pulled into a ponytail and down my uniform, which I admit is a little wrinkly because I sometimes pass out on my bed while writing lyrics.
But his focus mostly remains on my face, like he can’t believe I’m in the same vicinity as him.
I don’t know how much time passes as we just stare at each other. But then Sophie pokes her elbow into my ribs, jostling me out of whatever trance I was in.
“Go say hi,” she hisses at me.
“What? Oh…right.”
I slide out of my chair and make my way to him, my heart rate spiking and pounding in my head.
After all this time, I can’t believe my body still reacts to his close proximity.
I tried so hard to avoid him all morning so I wouldn’t have to deal with the crazy emotions I know will ensue, but it looks like I have no choice but to make contact.
When he and I stand face to face, we once again just stare at each other. I knew he was good-looking when I peeked at him before math class, but he’s even more handsome up close. I still see the fifteen-year-old boy I met at camp, the boy who was so sweet and sensitive and kind. Or so I thought.
He rubs the back of his head before laughing sheepishly. “I guess I’ll be the first to break the awkward ice. Hey, Raven. It’s been a while. How are you?”
He sounds different, too. His voice is deeper and more mature. But it still carries the tone I’m used to.
I hug my upper arms as I force a smile, hoping my lips don’t shake. “Hi, Kylen. I’m good. I was surprised to see you here.”
“My old school burned down and they put me and three of my friends here.”
“I know. Principal Harrington announced it at the assembly.”
“Right.”
We’re engulfed in silence.
And even more silence.
When I glance at my friends and their boyfriends, I see that all six of their gazes are on us, full of curiosity. But when they catch me looking at them, they quickly twist away and start talking amongst themselves.
“Your friends, huh?” Kylen says, following my gaze.
“Yep.”
“The famous Sophie and Carly, the friends you made in ninth grade. I don’t know the other girl and the guys.”
“That’s Addie. We became friends with her a few months ago. And the guys are their boyfriends.”
“Their boyfriends?” he asks.
“What?”
“Nothing.” He bounces on the heels of his feet, crossing his arms over his chest. “They seem cool.”
“They’re the best.”
He nods.
Quiet again.
“I remember Beckham,” I tell him, nodding to where Beckham sits with the other two guys a few tables away.
Kylen smiles crookedly. “Who could ever forget Beck? The other two are Leo and Jasper.”
My heart flutters in my chest as I take in that crooked smile. How many nights did I obsess over it at camp? I won’t admit it to anyone, but I wrote a song about his crooked smile. I stayed up all night composing it.
We stand in awkward silence again, our gazes veering away from each other and then meeting back up a few seconds later, only to look away again.
“So I guess I’ll, um…” I gesture to my table, where my untouched food sits on my tray.
He nods, stepping back. “Yeah, me too. I heard the food here is awesome.”
I give him a tight smile before spinning around with stiff shoulders like a wooden doll and making my way back to my table. My heart is still racing throughout my body and I’m not sure my legs are working properly.
When I reach my table, all of my friends watch me with extreme curiosity shining in their eyes.
My head is a jumbled mess as I reach for my fork and stab it into my gourmet chicken dish. But there’s no way I can shove this down my throat, even though I’ve had it many times before and know it’s one of the best things in the world.
“Well?” Addie demands.
My eyes shift to hers. “Well what?”
“Are you going to tell us what that was about or are you going to let us have heart attacks here?” Carly practically shouts.
“Will you keep your voice down?” I yell-hiss at her as my eyes snap to Kylen’s table. It’s quite a distance from my table, but Carly might as well have used a megaphone.
As if he feels my gaze on him, he turns around and meets my eyes. I quickly yank mine away.
“We’re kind of on pins and needles here, too, Raven,” Ryder says with a chuckle. “We guys heard a lot about this mysterious Camp Lover Boy.”
“Agreed,” Caleb says, he too carrying intense intrigue in his eyes.
He used to be much more serious only a few months ago because he was hired to be Addie’s bodyguard when she just started attending HBA.
Her grandfather, Nathaniel Bradshaw, is one of the richest men in the world, and he had an enemy who wanted Addie dead after killing her parents.
Caleb saved her from a horrible fate. Now he lives like a normal teen and is the best boyfriend to Addie.
“I haven’t heard much,” Damian admits as he wraps an arm around Sophie and presses a quick kiss to her cheek. “There’s still a lot of catching up I need to do with you guys.”
“Well, you’re not missing much,” I inform him.
“Liar,” Carly says to me.
“You guys are the ones making a big deal about it. Actually, you guys were always making a big deal about it when I told you it wasn’t a big deal.”
“If it wasn’t a big deal, you wouldn’t keep it such a big secret,” Addie points out.
I frown, trying not to groan.
“What did he say, Raven?” Carly asks. “I’m seconds away from a heart attack.”
“I don’t really remember,” I finally say. “It’s kind of a blur.”
“Was it really that traumatizing?” Sophie asks with big, brown eyes.
“No. We just said hi.”
Addie narrows her eyes at me, studying me closely. “Are you sure you guys just said hi?”
“Stop looking into things that aren’t there, Addie.”
She scowls as she takes a bite from her chicken.
“Were things awkward?” Sophie asks. “You guys haven’t seen each other in so long.”
“Yeah, it was very awkward. I felt like ants were crawling over my skin.”
“Darn,” Addie mutters with a resigned look on her face. That fills me up with hope that maybe she’s finally getting the message that Kylen and I are history and there will never be a present or future of us again.
Thankfully, my friends decide to drop the topic and talk about the new teen fantasy TV show that aired last night.
I love fantasy shows, but I don’t add to the conversation because my head is still stuffed with thoughts of Kylen.
I don’t know why I have this pit in my stomach.
It’s different from the way I felt when I first saw him in the auditorium.
That was mostly dread for how our first interaction would go.
But now that we experienced it, I have a different kind of feeling.
I don’t know what it is, exactly. Maybe disappointment?
Why, though? It’s not like I thought I would ever see him again.
I internally sigh. Okay, that’s a lie. Of course I’ve imagined what it would be like if he and I met again one day.
But I guess a part of me always wondered—and maybe hoped—that he would gather me in his arms and confess his undying love for me.
That he regrets what happened at camp and wants to pick up from where we left off.
Or maybe start again. But that’s so silly.
He’s moved on with his life. As if he ever lies awake at night thinking about me.
“You good, Raven?” Carly asks.
I blink and force a smile. “Of course I am. Have you tasted this delicious chocolate cake?” I push my mostly-eaten chicken aside and yank my dessert plate closer. “It’s begging to be devoured.”
My friends smile and dig into their cakes as well.
The chefs here cook the most amazing food I’ve ever had.
Most of the kids come from super-wealthy families and are used to eating this kind of food.
But since my friends and I are scholarship students and come from middle-income families, every meal tastes like it was made for royalty.
And even though Addie is technically rich now, she didn’t grow up that way and still feels like she doesn’t belong in that world.
The bell rings just when I scoop up my last bit of cake. My friends and I dump our trays in the discard pile and then head to our classrooms. I settle down in my history class and take out my stuff, and just as I place my pen down, I feel a sudden chill in the air.
My gaze flits to the door and my stomach drops to my toes. Because Kylen stands in the doorway, staring down at his phone with a frown, as though he’s not sure he’s in the right room.
“Please be in the wrong room,” I whisper.
He asks a student if this is Mr. Lewis’s class, and after she confirms that it is, he smiles in relief and walks inside.
“Darn,” I grumble.
When he passes my desk, he freezes and glances at me, then slowly moves his eyes to the empty desk across from me. It used to be occupied by another student, but she transferred out a few weeks after the semester started and it’s been empty ever since. I’m not exactly popular here.
Kylen opens his mouth, but then he closes it with a shake of his head and continues to a vacant seat in the back.
My heart sinks. He didn’t want to sit next to me.
Seriously, why do I care? I don’t want him to sit next to me in history class. I don’t want to interact with him. I don’t want to be forced to see his face a few times a week.
But yet…it stings that he just walked away.
I shake my head, shoving any thought of him far, far away from my mind.