Chapter 13
Chapter Thirteen
Days later, we were headed to the mountains. Levi had ordered a debit card to his bank account with my name on it, and he’d been with me nearly every day except when he was at work.
I hadn’t quite accepted my new roommate, but I couldn’t complain, considering he was helping me pick up from the last-second wedding.
For once, my house was clean when I left it, and I was finding that I didn’t mind the company. As time passed and we didn’t find anything petty to argue over, I realized that we meshed well together. I read, he read. And instead of constantly asking for my attention, we were able to sit in the same room and do our own thing.
And the fact that I had the honeymoon to look forward to helped as well.
I got excited at the first sight of the vast forest and tall mountains. The moment the car started climbing in elevation, I was home.
It was late winter, nearing spring. This wasn’t the best time to come, yet the Appalachians were still gorgeous, even when the trees were bare. They stood tall in the distance, making me feel surrounded in the safest way.
We pulled onto the Gatlinburg exit but continued heading up the mountain. We passed the tourist traps and all of the eateries I’d known since I was a kid. We’d spend some time in downtown, but not much. I wasn’t here to shop; I was here to enjoy the mountains.
It probably wasn’t the most romantic thing I could do, but after years of walking the same neighborhood and being too broke to see anything new, I was in the mood for adventure.
Isra had insisted on taking care of everything for the cabin, and I was too busy worrying about making my dwindling migraine medicine stretch to think too hard about where we would be staying.
But as we pulled up, I realized I should have given it more thought. This was a cabin, but it was an A-frame with one room.
“That . . . is small,” I said.
“It could be bigger on the inside.”
“I think that’s reserved for sci-fi shows,” I said. “We should have booked this ourselves.”
I got out of the car, grabbed my suitcase, and stared at the tiny cottage with concern. Levi went first and entered the code Isra had given him. When we walked in, my jaw clenched when I saw only one bed, a bathroom, and a kitchenette.
“So ... no privacy,” I said.
“Nope.”
“At least there’s a door for the bathroom.”
“I should have seen this coming,” Levi muttered. “But she usually goes overboard and gets places way too big.”
“Levi, she thinks we’re married.”
“She always got six-bedroom cabins anywhere we went. Since she said she knew this place, I thought ...”
My eyes trailed to the bed and widened. “Oh, she did go overboard.”
But in a very different way.
There were roses everywhere, along with a stack of porn DVDs and condoms.
“I’m gonna kill her.”
“On one hand, I’m glad your stepmom is sex positive, but on the other, this is my nightmare.”
Levi looked as horrified as I felt. As much as I would laugh about this if it were happening in my favorite book, this was not funny now.
All we had were open windows and a stall for a bathroom. To make things worse, there was a massive jetted tub out in the open with mirrors surrounding it.
The honeymoon special, I realized with horror.
“We can find something else,” he said. “I’m sure there’s some other hotel open.”
Rubbing my temples, I tried to think of a way out of this.
But then I looked out the windows that dominated the entire front of the cabin. I hadn’t even noticed it outside because I’d been far too horrified. But this? This was beyond my wildest dreams. I could see down the mountain and into the distance. When the sun set in a few hours, it was going to be gorgeous. Even now, we had a breathtaking view of the clouds in the sky. There were even windows on the other side too, where the back side of the cabin had a balcony, giving us a view of the sunrise in the morning.
“This is ... Oh my God. Look at these views.”
Levi turned and followed my line of sight. “That’s why she picked this place.”
“I’m staying,” I said.
“You’re what?”
“I’m staying here. You can find somewhere else if you want.”
“Do you really think I’m leaving my wife to stay in a cabin on the mountain by herself?”
“I’d be fine.”
“I don’t care. We aren’t testing that. What would you do if you saw a bear?”
“Probably the same thing I do with most crises in my life. Panic and hope it goes away.”
“That’s not a good bear plan.”
“So, if you’re staying, and I’m staying, then who’s getting the bed?”
His eyes went to the queen-sized mattress and then back to me.
“We could share it.”
“But aren’t you supposed to argue with me and offer to sleep on the couch?”
“What couch?” he asked. “And we all know how this ends. We’ll share the bed.”
“You know how this goes in romance novels, right? You’ll wake up with a boner and then we’ll have hot sex or something.”
“I’ve already seen your boobs and had no problems keeping myself contained.”
“Through a top , and we aren’t talking about that! Levi, what if I feel your hard, velvet rod and get horny?”
“Do you have to call it that?”
“What would you prefer? Disco stick? Tunnel penetrator?”
“Dick? Or penis? The normal terms.”
“You said you read romance novels.”
“I do, but I close the book the second it’s called a velvet rod. Can you imagine how disgusting velvet would be ...” He trailed off. “Never mind.”
“You’re not supposed to take it literally.”
“It’s how my brain works.”
“You’re really imagining a real velvet co?—"
“Let’s put any talk about velvet and rods away, please. ” He shook his head and set down his bag. “But the point stands, if you’re staying, I’m staying with you. Are you okay with that?”
“I’d be stuck in this tiny cabin any day. You’re just a bonus. Or a downside. It depends on how you act for the next three days.”
“I’ll be on my best behavior.”
“And I won’t. I have many behaviors, but none of them are my best.”
Levi chuckled, no evidence of surprise on his face. “I wouldn’t expect anything else. Now, what’s the first thing on your list of things to do?”
“First is dinner. Then I want to find whatever local bookstore is around here. And after, we can deal with the only-one-bed thing.”
A woman could get used to being spoiled. Or maybe that was just me. I usually avoided going out to eat, save for the special occasions when I’d find myself at a local eatery when I had the money. But the family business never paid me enough for luxuries, and I’d gone without for far too long.
The same didn’t go for Levi. He told me to order whatever I wanted and I intended to take him up on it.
The restaurant was somewhere I would have never been able to afford going to on my own. It was a Gatlinburg staple nestled in a log cabin. I’d always wanted to come here for the massive plates of delicious food alone, but it was considered a fancier place. The staff was dressed up and each table had a candle and flowers lit on its surface. Years ago, it had been way out of Gram’s and my budget. I couldn’t imagine what it cost now.
We were put in a back corner that was quiet, and I found myself wishing I’d packed one of my nice dresses rather than only leggings and T-shirts.
“Oh my God ,” I said when I opened my menu and saw the prices.
“What?” he asked.
“Nothing.” My voice was high. “Inflation is wild . Are you sure you don’t want a burrito out of a taco truck?”
“I only find the best for my wife, especially on our honeymoon.”
My cheeks heated as they always did when he called me his wife . He said it with such emphasis that it sounded so important to him. “You don’t have to call me that when it’s just the two of us.”
“On the contrary,” he said, “it’s what you are. Just like I’m your husband.”
“Yes, but I don’t call you that.”
“You should.”
“I prefer realism. Right now, you’re a pain in my ass.”
“I’m also your husband, which you seem to be avoiding saying.”
I rolled my eyes. “You’ve met me. I have no filter.”
“Then say it. Right now. Call me your husband.”
Was it possible for people to explode from embarrassment? “Y-you’re my husband.”
“Good,” he said. “But it still seems like we need practice.”
“Practice for what?”
“Being in love when we get back.” He said it like it was obvious. “Isra’s already asking if we’re okay. Apparently, we still seem stiff around each other, and we need to iron that out before we run into Calvin.”
“Right.” I nodded shallowly. “So more flirting. And more practice. You’re really dedicated to this, huh?”
“Perfection is my specialty.”
Yes. It was. And it drove Calvin crazy. Me, on the other hand? I would bask in his attention as long as I could, because when it was just us, I could forget about Levi and Calvin’s stupid rivalry. I could see a version of reality where he liked me.
Getting the chance to flirt with Levi would be fun. All of my flirting was found either in my imagination or on the page of a book. Real-life Amy was sorely out of practice.
Calvin would call it out the second he saw it, which further justified everything Levi had just brought up. Even if he didn’t figure out that this marriage was for revenge, he’d find any hole in our story.
But I couldn’t forget my conversation with Lily.
“It’s not too much to ask you not to break my heart, is it?”
His eyes softened. “I’ll do my best to never break your heart, Amy Willard.”
I nodded, but I didn’t know what he could do when he would eventually be done with this and I would be alone again. If I fully gave myself to our marriage, I would never want it to end.
I was distracted by the waiter coming to get our orders. Once we were done eating, we headed to our next destination: a bookstore.
When we walked in, I made a beeline for my favorite section.
Usually, I made these kinds of trips alone. If Lily was with me, she would linger in the romance section for a few minutes before disappearing into the fantasy one. This time, Levi went with me and immediately picked out a book from the shelf.
I reached for one with a blue cover that I’d seen before but couldn’t place.
“Nope. Not that one.” Levi took it out of my hands. “It doesn’t have a happy ending.”
“Wh—really?” I asked.
“Yes. One of them dies in the end, but the publisher decided to market it as romance. It got me good.”
I looked back at it. That was where I remembered it from. V had read it years ago and warned me.
A lot of people must have read this and been shocked.
“Thanks for the warning, then,” I mumbled and went for something else. It was obvious that Levi was well-versed in the section. There were a few that I wanted to read but they weren’t available at the library yet, so I grabbed those and smiled up at him.
“Does being a good husband mean you’ll buy me more books?”
He did a double take, his cheeks going pink. “Yes, of course.”
I should have married for money a long time ago. Who cared what it did for my morals? Buy me books and I’d instantly fold.
We both had a stack of them by the time we walked back out to the car.
“Okay, so we’ve done what I wanted to,” I said. “Is there anything you want out of this honeymoon?”
“I’ve never been here, so I have no idea what’s fun.”
“There’s putt-putt golf. Shopping. Movies?—”
“What about the SkyBridge?”
I froze. That hadn’t been a thing when I came here last. But “sky” and “bridge” were two things I didn’t love.
“Um, are you sure? There’re other things.”
“I like adventure. I can do it on my own if you’re scared of heights.”
I should have let him go by himself. I didn’t do heights. Even hiking in the mountains, I knew I would avoid any cliffs too high up. Anything less than the solid ground beneath me was a one-way ticket to a panic attack.
But I wasn’t about to admit that to him.
“No, I’ll be fine. But what if it’s busy?”
“Google says it’s slower than usual.”
Fuck.
“It’s far away.”
“It’s not far at all. But if you don’t want to?—”
“No,” I said, shaking my head. “No. I love the sky. And I love bridges. It sounds fun!”
It was not fun at all. To get to the SkyBridge, we had to go up the Gatlinburg ski lift. Luckily, there were sturdy safety attachments, or at least they looked sturdy. I’d never let Gram convince me to go up. Letting my feet dangle above a mountain in the dark was the last thing I wanted to do.
Levi didn’t seem bothered. He took pictures of the town’s skyline, which was lit with color. Meanwhile, I had a death grip on the metal in front of me that kept me in my seat. I hated that I couldn’t see below me.
“Are you okay?” Levi asked.
“Yep. Never better!” My voice came out far too loud, and I knew I sounded the furthest from normal.
His warm hand encased mine. “Amy. We don’t have to do this.”
“I’m fine.”
His grip tightened. “I care more about you than seeing a bridge. We can go back down.”
I didn’t doubt he would, but I wouldn’t ask him to. He’d done so much for me—too much, by my standards—and I wasn’t going to chicken out on the one thing he seemed interested in.
“I hate heights,” I said through gritted teeth. “But I’ll be fine.”
“Amy,” he warned.
“We’re almost there. The bridge won’t be worse than this.”
I had no idea what the bridge would be like, but his hand on mine made me think it would be okay. If he wasn’t worried, then I shouldn’t be either. The lift didn’t stop when we reached the top of the mountain, and my heart was in my throat as we leaped off onto the solid ground below.
“Oh my God,” I said, gulping in breaths of air. “I made it.”
“You did. You were very brave.”
I didn’t realize that I was gripping his arm like a lifeline until that moment, and I let go of him immediately. “Sorry. I’m actually gonna be brave now.”
“No need to on my account.”
I shook my head and my eyes roamed the gift shop. Thankfully, we were in a warm front, so the top of the mountain wasn’t snowy like it could have been any other time of the year. I was able to see the incredible view of the lights of Gatlinburg from the top of the mountain.
“I’m going over the bridge,” he said. “You can wait here.”
“What? I want to go.”
“This is a bridge over a mountain. I don’t think this is something you’ll enjoy.”
“But I want to!” It didn’t make sense that I did. All I knew was that I didn’t want him to see something like this without me. “Can I go?”
“Fine, but if you freak out?—”
“You can make fun of me like I deserve.”
“No, we’ll turn back.” His hand tightened. “Say the word, and we’ll make sure you feel safe.”
My mouth opened and closed, words failing me. It was such a simple thing to say, yet it shocked me speechless. All I could do was nod and let my hand fall into his.
I hated how much it felt like it should be there.
It wasn’t a long walk over to the bridge. I told myself the whole time that it would be fine and I would be brave.
All of that flew out the window when I got near the edge.
“Holy shit,” I said, grabbing Levi’s hand again. “Okay, remember how I said I hated heights? That was an understatement. A major one, actually. I’m terrified of heights.”
“I put that together.” He sounded way too calm for someone who was not only way higher up than any human should be, but also having his hand crushed to death by his wife. “Should we go back?”
I looked down and my heart clenched, but I shook my head. “No. I want to do this.”
“Are you sure?”
I could only nod.
“Okay, then we’re doing this.” He spun on his heel to face me, not the bridge. His other hand moved to mine. “Let’s take the first step.”
“I don’t know if I can move.”
“Look at me. Don’t look down.”
I did as I was told, my eyes meeting his. I took one step. “There’s no one behind me, right?”
“Who cares about other people? This is about you and me.” Levi pulled me to take another step.
I was now fully on the bridge, and I wanted nothing more than to peek over the edge to see the nothingness below.
“No,” Levi said as if he could read my mind. “Only look at me, darling. I’m the only one here.”
Our steps doubled and then tripled. Wind hit my face as Levi guided me further on. When gazing at him, falling to my death didn’t seem so bad.
“And we’re here. We’re in the middle of the bridge. Next is the glass part, but?—”
“I want to go. I want to do the whole thing.”
He didn’t miss a beat. “All right. Then keep looking at me.”
We slowly moved over the transparent ground. It was terrifying, but Levi’s hand was solid.
“I did it,” I said.
“You did.”
I slowly turned, seeing the entire skyline below. I could still feel the fear hitting like a ton of bricks, so I leaned into the one safe person I had.
With him near me, I could finally notice that the bridge was still lit in colorful holiday lights and that people were taking pictures of the scene around us.
“It’s beautiful up here.”
“Yes, it is.”
I glanced over at him and found him looking at me .
“Don’t miss out by making sure I’m okay.”
“Trust me, darling. I’m not missing out on a thing.”
My breath caught in my throat and I dragged my eyes away. Darling. I liked that nickname, and now that I wasn’t terrified, I could register that he’d now called me that twice .
“We should get a photo,” I said. “For Isra and Nancy.”
Levi got out his phone and positioned it above us. His long arms could get both us and the skyline. I leaned into his warmth, smiling for the camera. I didn’t expect it when he pressed a kiss to my hair.
This was intimate. This whole night had been, and I could already tell I was forgetting that this was fake.
Once the picture was captured, I stepped away. “I should get back before my bravery wanes. We still have to go down the ski lift.”
“I’ll come with you.”
“You should stay and enjoy the view.”
Levi’s eyes were still on me. “Don’t worry. I got all that I needed.”
Thankfully, the ski lift wasn’t as terrifying going down. I must have used up all of my available fear for the day because I enjoyed seeing everything below me.
As we got near the car, more of the adrenaline faded, and I finally felt the cold in my hands. It wasn’t a frigid night, but the mountain air, coupled with the wind, had taken a toll on my body, and all I could think about was the jetted tub back at the cabin.
I wasn’t sure if I could sneak a bath in while Levi was asleep, but I was willing to try.
“Where to next?” he asked.
“Back to the cabin. I need to warm up.”
Our drive wasn’t enough to fully get rid of the chill that had settled in my body, even though Levi turned up the heat in the car.
“So ... you must be tired from all of that driving,” I said as we pulled up.
He opened the door. “I’m fine. Did you have something else that you wanted to do?”
“No, of course not. I was just saying that if you wanted to call it an early night, I wouldn’t blame you.”
He paused, hand near the doorknob, and turned to me. “What are you planning?”
“I’m not planning anything. I’m being nice.”
“You’re heavily hinting that you want me to be asleep. And what for?”
“I don’t have to tell you.”
“Is it something embarrassing?”
“What could be embarrassing?”
“There is a stack of DVDs in there.”
My jaw dropped. “Levi, no . That’s not—I just want a bath!”
“A bath?”
“Yes. In the big tub in there? After being outside all day, it sounds nice. But I definitely don’t want you to see me, so you should be asleep.”
“But I’m not tired.”
“And you aren’t seeing anything. What happened to being a gentleman?”
“I am a gentleman. I’ll get the bath started while you get ready. And when you’re back, I’ll turn around.”
“And you won’t bother me?”
“If that’s what you want.”
“That’s a decent offer,” I said. “But I don’t know if I trust you.”
“You trusted me enough to go on that sky bridge with me.”
That was a good point. An unfairly good point.
And damn it, I also wanted a bath.
“Fine. But if you peek, I’m revisiting mariticide.”
He put up his hands in mock defense and then opened the door. I walked into the warm room and eyed the bath excitedly.
“Go get changed. I’ll have this ready for you.”
Before I even had the bathroom door shut, the water was running. I couldn’t help the small smile that bloomed on my face at him running a bath for me. I’d never let anyone get close enough to do something like this, even when I tried my hand at relationships.
And hearing the running water only proved to me that action was one of the sexiest things a guy could do.
I slowly peeled off my layers and grabbed at the cotton bathrobe on the back of the door. I wrapped it tightly around myself and walked back out.
“Okay, I’m—” I paused when I saw the bathtub. “Are those the rose petals from the bed?”
“They’re fresh. Did you really think I’d give you old ones?”
“I thought you were just running water, not making a romantic scene.”
I eyed the red rose petals floating in the water. Gentle bubbles simmered at the surface and the air smelled floral and sweet.
“It’s our honeymoon, after all. And you deserve the utmost relaxation after being so brave.”
I narrowed my eyes. “I can’t tell if you’re teasing me or not.”
“Does it matter if you get a hot bath out of it?”
Not really. The cold had gotten into my bones and the smell of the bath was enough to soothe any of my stresses.
“All right. Turn around. This bath is so nice that I have to get in now.”
Levi looked at me one last time before turning. I watched him for a good few seconds to make sure he stayed with his back to me before I took my robe off and settled into the steaming hot water.
I couldn’t help the moan that escaped my mouth as I sunk into pure heaven. This was the greatest bath I’d ever had in my life.
I checked on him again, but all I could see was the hard line of his shoulder. He was more tense than he had been a second ago.
“Don’t get too jealous. You can have a bath after me.”
“A bath isn’t what I need.” His voice was low.
I let out a puff of air and looked around for a book to read. That was the only way I could relax and forget that my fake husband was right there .
Only, I couldn’t see any. I sat up, crossed my arms over my boobs, and cursed when I saw the one I was after was sitting on the bed.
“What? Did I make the bath too hot?”
“No. I left my book on the bed.”
“I’ll grab it.”
I sank low into the water. “You’ll see.”
“I’ll cover my eyes and then go outside.”
“Okay,” I said quietly. “Thank you.”
Levi crossed the room, grabbed the paperback, and walked it over to me. I dried one of my hands and reached for it, checking once again to be sure he was truly covering his eyes.
And he was, so much so that he completely missed my hand. His other one reached down to grab it, right when I reached up, but as the book was safe from the water, I realized his eyes were open and he stared right at me.
Naked me.
His breath stuttered and I was pretty sure mine did the same.
Heat spread throughout my body, the kind that had nothing to do with the bath. His eyes didn’t leave any part of me and I wasn’t sure if I wanted him to look away or gaze at me forever.
But I had to diffuse the silence somehow or I would explode.
“Should I take your silence as an insult, or are you in awe?”
Levi’s throat worked and I realized I’d never seen him like this. “A-awe. Definitely awe.”
Shit. He was supposed to go along with the joke. “I ... You know, you were gonna have to see some of this anyway.”
“I’m not sure if I’m seeing enough .”
His voice was rough and I realized what he was propositioning. He wanted more .
And judging by the way my body reacted, I did too.
My heart thudded. I was so close to saying yes, but my last shred of sense told me that this was a terrible idea, one that would get me hurt in the end.
“I shouldn’t.” My voice was as thin as paper. “It would make things complicated.”
Levi’s lips pursed, but he took one step back. Then another.
And then he was outside.
“Fuck,” I said the second I was alone. My skin still tingled with the memory of a touch I’d turned down, and while I knew it was right , I wasn’t sure if it was what I wanted .
My eyes slipped closed. It was way too easy to imagine what could have happened.
He would have pulled me out of this bath and put me on the bed, his hands attached to the swell of my breasts. His mouth could have been anywhere, but I would have wanted it on mine, making that kiss on my back porch real all over again.
My hand slipped down my body before I could stop it.
Back in my fantasy, it was his hand caressing my wet flesh. He was the one circling my clit, expertly leading me to an orgasm. When I’d had one, two, three, or however many I wanted, he pulled out his cock and pressed it gently into me, making room for himself.
I let out a gasp as my hands did their best to replay what was going on behind my eyelids.
It was wrong to fantasize about this when I’d just turned him down, but I had to get my shit together. I was stuck with Levi for the next few days, and if I didn’t want to lose my last shred of sanity and jump him the second we were alone again, I needed to work out this tension.
And what he didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him.
Back in my own little world, he was fucking me with powerful thrusts. The whole bed moved with us, and all I could feel was the way his cock brushed against my sensitive G-spot.
I sank lower in the water, body going lax as my pleasure grew.
More, I’d beg of him. Give it all to me. Make me forget every other man.
He’d growl and do just that, plunging into me with new tenacity.
My body arched, fingers deep inside of me, and the taut string of my pleasure snapped, sending me over the edge of an intense orgasm.
“Y-yes, Levi.” I tried to keep my voice low, but the images flashing through me called his name, and I was powerless to stop it.
As the orgasm crested, I caught my breath and hoped that was enough to curb any desire I had going forward. But I could feel pressure simmering under my skin. My own fingers weren’t enough.
I wanted more .
“Fuck, that was stupid,” I muttered. I slowly stood and pulled the plug on the bathtub. I quickly grabbed for the robe and ran to the bathroom to get fully dressed before I had to face Levi again.
I threw on thick pajamas and then the other robe in the bathroom before I steeled myself to go outside.
“Hey,” I said quietly. “I’m decent now.”
“I’ll be in in a second.” He didn’t turn to face me, and I darted inside to give him his space.
Was he mad that I turned him down? Should I have?
I bit my lip as I climbed into bed. Maybe this was complicated either way I looked at it.
Maybe faking a marriage was harder than I thought.
The door opened and he walked inside.
Our eyes finally met, and his carried all of the heat they had when he’d left the room. All I could do was gulp and sink under the covers.
Levi’s footsteps were heavy as he went to his bag and then the bathroom, and I tried to think about what to say while he did whatever he needed to. When he came out, he was in a T-shirt and sweatpants, and the bed dipped under his weight.
“Amy,” he began, “I . . .”
“I’m sorry,” I said. “I just can’t—I didn’t want to ...”
“You don’t need to give me an explanation.”
“But you’ve done so much for me, so if you wanted to—I mean if you’re mad, then we can work something out.”
“What?”
“I’m offering sex.”
“Yeah, I figured that. I just don’t know why .”
“I’ve spent a lot of your money. And we’re stuck on the honeymoon together so?—”
“Stop. If you think I’m gonna do anything when you’re not one hundred percent willing, then you’re dead wrong. I want you to want me, not have sex with me because you think I want it or because you have to.”
“Then why did you sound like you did when you came in?”
He was silent for a long time. “That’s a me problem.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, I am. How little do you think of me?”
“I don’t think little of you. I just don’t think I should have all of this without some sort of reward for you.”
I couldn’t look at him, and it was easier not to.
“I’m getting all the reward I need.”
“But you can’t be.”
“Trust me, I am. You may not believe it, but this is exactly where I want to be. And maybe one day, when you believe my words, I’ll tell you why.”
“That doesn’t make sense.”
“I know it doesn’t, darling. But one day it will. Then all of it will be easy to understand.”
My eyes were wide. Was there some other thing he got out of this? Was there something I was missing?
Or did pissing off Calvin make him this happy?
“Go to sleep, Amy. Save figuring all of this out for tomorrow.”
Levi’s hand rested on my shoulder, his heat a reminder of what had happened in the bath.
Damn it. I wanted him, even if I didn’t understand him.
But I was an adult . I wasn’t going to let anything happen.
No matter how close he got.