Chapter 30 Rafael
Rafael
Another sheet of paper receives my wrath. Crumpling it into a ball inside my fist, I fire it across the room, gritting my teeth as it lands alongside a growing pile of identical ones beside the overflowing bin.
‘Should I call Greenpeace and tell them why deforestation has increased tenfold?’
‘Very funny,’ I huff, as Gabe leans against my office doorway. Benedict stands beside him like a furry little henchman, here to witness my demise.
‘Who is she?’ His lips curve into a knowing smile that I’d like to wipe off his face.
‘Who said it’s a woman?’
He lifts one shoulder and drops it. ‘What else can it be? You don’t sweat this much even when one of our biggest accounts is on the line.’
If only he knew how wrong he is.
He bends and scoops up a ball of paper, unscrewing it. His face falls as he reads it. ‘Brother?’ he groans. ‘Seriously?’ He screws the paper back into a ball and tosses it into the bin. ‘Does Dove know?’
‘Not yet,’ I grumble.
‘Tell her before she finds out another way.’
‘I was going to this afternoon . . . with Aurora,’ I say.
Just the sound of her name makes my chest hurt. I rub at the centre of it and Gabe looks at me in concern.
‘You oka—’
‘I’m fine,’ I grit out before he can make a big deal out of nothing. ‘Just a little indigestion.’
Bloody liar. My heart feels like it’s being wrung out like a wet rag, but I can’t tell my brother that.
He’ll assume there’s something wrong. Make me go for a check-up.
The only thing wrong with me is the fact I’m physically sick from the idea of Aurora meaning what she said.
That me and her are done. Her calling me jealous and insecure I’ll take.
She’s not wrong. I am bloody jealous of any bastard who’s touched her.
And my insecurities revolve around her walking out of my life. Which she did this morning.
‘Aurora . . . She’s everything I want, she’s . . . goddamn it . . . I need her, Gabe.’
His brows shoot up at my confession. He’s never heard me ever come close to saying anything like this about a woman before.
‘Do you love her?’ He looks at my miserable face and must see his answer. ‘Then what are you doing sitting here, trying to write apology letters, when we both know anything you come up with will sound like an illiterate mole wrote it?’
I snort. ‘Thanks for the vote of confidence.’
‘Aurora needs to hear it directly from you. You excel at face to face, Rafe. You’re good at having difficult conversations with people. It’s why you’re the best CEO this company has ever had.’
‘Don’t let our father hear you say that,’ I mutter.
I push my finger and thumb into my eye sockets and exhale.
My brother doesn’t know how wrong he is.
Sure, I’ve made Fairfax Guardian a tonne of money and brought in high-profile clients since I took over from our father.
But no one in the family knows the real reason we lost the Wyndham account.
None of them know it was my fault. That I fucked it up because I was weak.
None of them know just how screwed up I am.
‘I’d rather not look at your sour face for the rest of the afternoon. Go and sort it out with her. Then work out how you’re going to tell our sister that you’re in love with her best friend.’ He frowns. ‘I don’t bloody envy you that one.’
‘Thanks.’ I grimace, but Dove’s reaction is the least of my problems. Especially if I can’t get Aurora to forgive me.
Gabe shakes his head, giving me a withering look before he leaves, Benedict hot on his heels.
He’s right. I can’t fail. I promised myself after what happened with the Wyndham account that I’d never bloody fail at anything again.
And this is Aurora. There’s no way in hell I’m going to fail with her.
I drop my head into my hands. What have I done?
My phone chimes with an alert from my home security system, breaking into my dark well of self-pity. I open the connected app and select the camera in the hallway. Aurora’s stepping inside the front door, her eyes darting around like she’s checking I’m not home.
She’ll be coming to get her things. Erasing herself from my life.
I can’t just sit here like an idiot and watch, knowing I’m about to lose her. I have to do something. I have to convince her to stay.
I grab my car keys from my desk at the exact moment her lips move. I turn up the volume on the camera.
‘You had to ruin it, didn’t you? Just when I was starting to think you weren’t that bad,’ she mutters, wrapping her arms around herself like a shield.
I zoom in on her face, catching the wobble of her lower lip.
She’s upset.
Over me. Over us.
And as much as the sight of her hurting eats me alive, it also stokes the raging fire in my gut. It means she cares about what she’s losing. A dangerous boundary we’re getting too close to. I should let her get her things and walk away. It’s what needs to happen.
I rub at the centre of my chest, over where the healed line of skin sits beneath my shirt.
It’s what I should do.
The camera picks up the choking sound she makes, a mix between a held-back sob and a garbled cough, before she shakes her head like she’s chastising herself for caring.
The pain growing in my chest is greater than any I’ve ever felt before.
My office door hits the wall with a loud bang as I punch my way through it and storm towards the lifts.
I’m coming, Beauty.