49. The Punishment
Chapter forty-nine
The Punishment
Astoria
I wake up to him checking my pulse. "How long have I been out?"
"Two days."
“I want it now, Julian. Whatever it is you’re gonna do to me, burn me alive, skin me, just get it over with.”
Julian lifts his eyebrows and stares at me, silently asking me if I’m sure, but I don’t change my resolve.
“Fine,” he says and after a few seconds of staring at each other, he grabs the low neck of my nightgown and rips it all the way while releasing a roar so loud and full of rage that it hurts my ears.
“Let’s go then.” I sound so brave, but as I walk, my knees are almost giving out.
He takes me by the chain. The protective denial wears down when we stop walking at the end of a narrow hallway. He opens a door, and there’s nothing but darkness inside. The chilly air makes me shake, or maybe it’s my phobia. I look down, then back at him. With my eyes, I beg him from the pit of my soul not to take me down there. I swallow deep and back away.
“Come on,” he says, pulling on the chain a bit.
My lip trembles as the phobia erases everything. I'm not present when I run away so fast that I end up falling. The chain is fully extended and there's nowhere for me to go, but I pull as hard as I can with all my weight, trying to crawl away. The collar digs into my trachea and esophagus. It hurts but not as much as being left in the dark until I nearly lose my mind. Choking sounds fill the hall but it's distant to me. All I know is that I need to run.
Julian drags me back by wrapping the chain around his arm, over and over again, until I’m right up against him. I’m not aware when I try to push him away, or when he picks me up and I hold on to him like a monkey, begging and crying for him not to do this.
“Come on, little bird, you know you need this. Hopefully, this time, you learn where your home is.”
“Julian, please don’t do this. I know where my home is. I promise. I know where it is."
He chuckles while carrying me and walking into the pit of hell. “You’re funny, Astoria. You were so brave just minutes ago. You always say the same things when trying to avoid consequences.”
“I told you I would do anything… please Julian, forgive me.”
“I already forgave you. That’s why you’re still alive.”
I hang onto him with increasing determination as he descends into the darkness, wanting for my body to become a part of his skin so that he will not leave me in the dark. I commit the mistake of opening my eyes and blubber on his shoulder as the chilly darkness consumes us. My entire body quakes. The sound of my teeth chattering, my heavy, trembling breathing and hammering heart deafen me. We reach the bottom of the long stairs and walk through a tunnel to a large low ceiling room where he turns on a dim orange light. It's happening all over again. The dread is so thick in my veins. There are three iron doors. Getting me off him turns out to be like fighting off an octopus, once he unravels one of my limbs I snap on another.
“Get off me, Astoria.”The anger is now rising in his tone.
What can I do? I shake my head, with boogers and tears running down my face. With a whiny cowardly whisper I beg, “No.”
“We’re already here. Get off me!” The dirt doesn't soften the blow to my head when he pushes me off him. He opens one door to what I assume is my new cell.
Inside the room, there's a weird contraption I’ve never seen. It has wooden pallets that he forces me to kneel on. He secures my legs to it with tight leather restraints on my calves, and on my thighs. My waist bends over another flat pallet. He ties more restraints around my waist and replaces the collar with straps. I’m on all fours over a wood slab that runs from my chest to my belly. I assume this is for him to fuck me. He takes both my arms and ties them behind me. My tits hang over each side of the contraction. He secures a gag ball into my mouth. Already, I’m hyperventilating.
I can do this. I can do this. I keep lying to myself.
Julian walks out of the room. The door slams shut. Pitch blackness swallows me. I can't calm myself. The longer he’s not here, the more I want it to be over, and the more I wish he would’ve killed me. Why didn’t he? I don’t know how long it’s been when the door opens. What used to be a dim light, now blinds me. He doesn’t say a word, but pushes something extremely cold under my right butt cheek. Within seconds, it’s so hot, I scream and try with all my might to get off the contraption or to topple it over. I pull forward so hard the restraint on my neck cuts into my skin and I’m sure I’m going to break my own neck. Even with my mouth completely full, the scream echoes. I want to bite down on the gag so badly that my jaw hurts. My nails bury into my clenched, sweaty palms past the first layer of skin.
What was sticking to my thigh finally lifts off, but now it’s a different type of throbbing pain, and another wail runs out of me, followed by endless wracking, quaking sobs. Although I can’t process it, I know what he has done to me. The smell of cooking meat fills my nostrils doesn't allow me to deny it though, he has branded me.
“It’s over, pretty bird. You were such a brave, good girl. Shh…”
It hurts so much I can't calm my hysteria, the screaming. His palm gently caresses my back.
The burning sensation on my thigh intensifies and wakes me. I can’t take the pain. The silence is replaced by my whimpering and rushed breathing then my wailing. I hear him moving, then feel his fingers applying something to the burn. The acute pain pulls hysterical screams out of me that end in sobs. I'll do anything for it to stop hurting.
He blows cold air on it, but it doesn’t alleviate the torture. “Try to calm down, little bird. You’re only increasing your circulation which intensifies the pain. It’s over. I promise,” he says as he places a gauze bandage over it.
But it’s not over. I can’t take the scorching anguish. This means I can’t stop screeching and crying.
“How many times did you fuck him, little bird?” His voice wakes me. The first thing I feel is the throbbing, scorching agony on my thigh. The second thing I feel is something filling, stretching my ass, and another entering my pussy. Dildos. A machine makes a rotating sound and the dildos enter me again and again. My eyes roll back in pleasure.
Julian walks closer to my face and whispers in my ear, “However many days you went to his house and let him fuck you, that’s how many days you’ll spend down here.”
I push his words away, not wanting to process them. His fingers at the back of my head unlock and remove the gag. I take several big gulps of air through my mouth. “Julian–”
“Shhh… don’t talk, little bird. You’ll just piss me off even more. Here, drink.” A straw touches my lips. I suck it and drink as much water as I can before he takes it away. A sob escapes me.
“That's it, pretty bird. You always look so fucking beautiful when you cry for me. Shh. Don't worry. I’m going to fill every hole in your body with my come. It’s coming, little bird… be patient.”
He cups my face with both his hands and the tip of his cock slides across my lips, wetting them with his juices. I lick my lips, tasting him for the first time in too long then stick my tongue out, licking the tip of him, enjoying the feel of him.
“Here you go.”
I open my mouth for it and while holding my head up with his palms on both my temples, he fucks me. He mimics the speed at which the dildos are entering me. As they speed up, so does he. I cry at my miserable, disgusting existence, but as the speed increases, just like always, my body melts from the stimulation. What I don’t expect is that just as my body constricts, a vibrator presses against my clit. I try with all my might to pull forward every time, but the pain from my thigh shoots through me, pulling a harrowing screech from me. My throat closes and I can’t help but bite him.
He stops, bends down, and warns, “Bite me again and you’ll beg me for death, Astoria.”
“I can’t hel–” His cock filling my throat interrupts my explanation. For what seems like the next century, I focus all of my energy on not biting Julian’s cock for fear of what he might do to me. I don’t notice how loud I’m screaming and how violently I’m jolting as orgasm after orgasm rolls through my body. With every one of them, the speed of the machine increases and I think this is the way he will kill me after all.
All the weight of my head hangs from his hands and my mouth is only open because his thrusting cock keeps it that way. I’m too exhausted.
“Come on, little bird, you can take it. I know you can.”
How is it he hasn’t come yet? My jaw hurts almost as much as my thigh. He’s never lasted this long. Or maybe having two dildos and a vibrator whose activity I can’t predict is too much for me to handle.
The machine stops and he pulls out of me. I wheeze on the verge of falling asleep as he pulls the dildos out as well. Both my holes throb at the rhythm with which they were fucked and miss being filled and massaged. It doesn’t take long at all before another, thicker dildo slips deep into my pussy. He spreads my butt cheeks, spits, and my eyes flutter shut as he slips into my ass, slowly filling me. He forces his way in, breaking my insides, pulling cries out of me. I squeeze the rope around my wrists so hard I’m sure it’s breaking skin.
“Oh.” It escapes me when I feel his balls against my cheeks. Julian moans. I’m too stretched out.
He slips in and out of me. “Fuck!” he cusses at the same time I call his name, “Julian.”
It’s too intense, too good and I fear I’m going to come soon.
“It’s been too long hasn’t it?” he asks me and although he doesn’t specify, I know he’s asking me about his dick being inside my ass. Yes, Julian, it’s been too long. I gasp as my walls thank him for the slow massage and stretching that comes with each of his thrusts.
“That’s it, little bird, squeeze me.” He spreads my cheeks and slams deeper, pulling a whimper out of me. “You missed it.”
“Yes.”
“You want more?”
“Yes.”
He fucks me harder, each penetration pulling a scream out of me until it becomes too good, too intense. My clit throbs for him, for more. My entire body coils around his slippery, thick, long cock. I can’t still it. It slams into me as it pleases while massaging, stretching, and breaking me. I bite down on my bottom lip, resisting coming, not breathing, violently shaking.
“Fuck yeah, that’s it, that’s it. Come!”
No! I don’t want to because I know he’ll keep fucking me and it will be torturous. I resist.
“Now!” he demands.
I explode at the same time the dildo in my pussy starts moving, fast.
"Oh fuck!" My screams followed by wailing overfill the cell.
“Fuck! Yes!” he yells and pummels my spasming ass. The intensity turns into torture, pulling violent wailings out of me. But their speed only increases.
“Julian!” I screech.
“Sing for me, pretty bird. I can’t come unless you sing for me. You know that.”
His voice sounds helpless, sending a heat through me. Despite him tying me up and torturing me like this, he still needs me to do something for him, to alleviate his cravings. His desperate tone in combination with the consistent, fast, hard penetration makes my pussy gush. I’m squirting for the longest time ever. My ass convulses on his dick again.
“God, I forgot how good your ass is at milking cock.”
My sobbing comes out in a long moan as if I were humming a song. “Daddy–” I whisper, desperate for him to finish.
Both he and the machine fuck me faster, harder and I can’t help but tighten and shake, my butt moving from side to side, my thigh still sending shooting, scorching pain. “Ahh!”
“Sing little bird, now.”
“Daddy, please come. Please. Daddy–!” The desperation in my echoing scream is deafening. I know Julian thrives on that. “Daddy. Come inside my ass, please. Please.”
“You really want it, pretty bird?”
Pretty bird… I needed to hear him call me that. His voice vocalizing the nickname melts my heart. Suddenly the excruciating intensity becomes delicious and I want nothing more than to please him, to hear him say it again. My eyes roll back as another orgasm tightens my insides.
“Julian!” I scream, desperate, not wanting to come again.
“Give it to me, pretty bird. Give it to me.”
I pant. “Julian, please come. Come, please. Please–”
Why isn't it working? Usually, when I beg him like this he finishes? I can't take it anymore. His moans become whimpers that send electric currents through me. I unwillingly tighten, the orgasm approaching. This time instead of screaming, I sob. Feeling defeated. There's no end in sight to this psychotic depravity.
“Daddy… please. I want your come… in my ass, please. Plea–se!”
His cock engorges, then jolts inside me and his hot come comforts me by warming and filling me, and letting me know it’s over. But Julian never stops until his dick is dead, so for a few excruciating seconds, I have to endure the tearing of my asshole while listening to the churning of his come with his last savage, incoherent thrusts. Holding my ass cheeks wide open, he pulls out while his come leaks out of me with every spasm. I’m gasping, and shaking, missing him inside me and wanting to die before he does it again.
Please, God, don’t let him do it again.
My entire body hurts, especially the branding, but what has me the most desperate for him now is that it’s been too long since I last went to the bathroom. I feel like a fishbowl holding all my urine in my bladder. It hurts so much I can’t help but weep.
“Julian!” I know he probably can’t hear me. “I need to pee. Please.” A few minutes pass before I hear the distant iron door, then his steps.
“Please. I need to pee. ”
He unties me and has to carry me to the tiny bathroom where he turns on a candle. I barely make it. The urine gushes out of me with such force a cry escapes me, and I lean my head on his legs right in front of me.
"C-can you give me some privacy? Please.."
He walks out of the bathroom but there's no door. After, when he returns, he turns on the shower and cleans me. The warm water is my only thread to sanity. The entire time, he has to help me stand. I keep staring at his eyes, wanting to tell him the truth. I love you. I missed you. You took too long to come back to me. It's why I wanted to get the punishment over with, because I know he won't believe me until it's over. He'll judge anything I say now as an attempt to manipulate him.
Once he dries me with a towel, my heart and breath hurry when I realize he's leading me right back to the contraption. He pauses in his step, our gazes meet, and I can tell what he’s asking me. Is this going to be a problem? I decide not to fight him. He ties me up, and just like all the other times, he covers the branding with new gauze, comes in my mouth and in my ass, then leaves without a word.
I grow so desperate for him to return, needing to feel, hear, and smell him that I start sobbing every time I wake, calling his name, begging for him. When I hear his footsteps just outside my door, the weeping becomes that of joy and gratitude. My walls and clit throb for him, dripping. I take his cock in my mouth, sucking him with a desperation that pulls moans and panting out of him.
“Fucking perfect.”
His words warm me. I don’t exist without them. The taste of him calms me. He’s really here, enjoying me. I’m pleasing him. My other holes scream for him. This means the minute he slips into me, I’ll come. It has happened so many times that he laughs at me. I feel no shame. I need it. I can’t wait.
He fists my hair, slamming his cock into my throat, making me gag. The warm salty come fills my throat and I swallow it. “Julian, don’t leave me. Please,” I whisper.
He kneels near my chest, and his lips bless my nipple by sucking on it. This is the first time he’s done this and because of that, it feels like heaven. “Yes. Oh yes. Please. Yes,” I can’t stop repeating as he pulls on it harder and harder, sending electric currents. I crave him inside me even more. “Please, fuck my ass. Please. I need it. Julian.” I moan, my need for him is so blatant I almost feel ashamed but there’s no room in me for any emotion except my addiction to him, and whatever happy hormones fill me when he fucks me.
His saliva drips from my nipple by the time he stops. I still feel the ghost of his sucking when he walks behind me. I’m dying for the filling, but then lose my breath when I feel it; it’s too much this time. Two dildos slip deep into my wet pussy. They alternate, one slipping deeper while the other almost comes out of me.
It’s too much, too deep. I have no more space. Then it stops, and that’s when Julian spreads my cheeks and the tip of his cock enters me. I gasp at the overstretching and can't find a way to breathe. I don’t want this.
“W-what are you doing? What are you–Jul-it hurts. O–w!” I scream as he pushes in, only feeling relief when his cock pops back out. But he doesn’t give up and when his cock fills my hole, tears slide out of me. I hold my breath at the pain. There’s no pleasure.I had forgotten this was supposed to be a punishment. The machine restarts. I can’t take it, but there’s nowhere for me to go, no way to escape. Julian groans with every penetration while I can only take short puffs of breaths.
“You like that, don’t you? How many dicks do you need, Astoria?”
“I’m… sor–”
“Come for me like this.”He moans.
“I c-can’t–” I can only puff a breath here and there. “It's too… much...”
“Take it!” he yells through his teeth. His speed and aggressiveness increase. I grimace at the stretching. If I could breathe I would be sobbing.
“This is what you wanted–”
“No.”
“Yes. This is what you wanted. Go ahead... show me how you wanted to be fucked by both of us.”
I gasp and whimper as my body tightens.
“Come!” His furious yelling demands it of me, so I climax, squirting hard.
Both the machine and he fuck me harder and I lose consciousness only to wake to him inside me, his thrusts are psychotic. The only thing that calms me is his warm come, coating my broken insides. At this point I doubt he will ever let me out of here. The hopelessness pushes me to cry silently.
I've been in a different world for a few days now. One where I can hardly hear him. When he speaks to me, forcing me to return, I only have tears to offer him. He has broken me. As he loosens the restraints, I don't move, speak, or even look at him. I am not here.
Hands lift my limbs, but I’ve been in the same position for so long that they have no strength. He carries me, his arms under the back of my neck and my knees. I'm dead weight, not moving at all. I know the agony he reigned upon me has only glued my soul to his even more.
Some couples bond through love, but Julian and I only bond through sex, and him torturing me.
The soft mattress feels like heaven beneath me. He turns me on my side and gently releases my legs. The searing hot pain from the branding forces me to wake from my world and I whimper, preferring death. Once again, my heart is pushing at my ribcage and my lungs are tired from pumping so much air so fast. Julian kneels beside the bed, our faces so near.
“Shh… I already told you it’s over, pretty bird. I’m proud of you. You were so sweet, so brave. Such a good girl.” He pushes away the hair sticking to my face while I sob and my breath trembles, puffing out of me. His middle and forefinger push down on my wrist, which I know by now means he’s checking my pulse. It has become a small action that means so much to me. It's fooled me into believing he cares. We stare at each other.
His eyes are the first to break the gaze and my heart breaks. I take a hold of his hand. “J-J-Julian, d-don’t leave. Please.”
“Keep being my good girl and go to sleep.”
“Th-there’s something y-you don’t know.” I love you. I missed you. I'm so sorry. Tell me how to fix this.
“You can tell me after your nap. You really need to rest, little bird.”
Little bird… he's not happy with me. He hasn't forgiven me. “Julian, I didn’t–”
The exhaustion takes over, making my eyelids too heavy for me to open. Although I feel him pull his hand away and lay mine on the bed, I can’t move or say anything. It’s dead silent for a while, but even in my deep sleep, I know and feel when Julian leaves. Even in the exhausted deep slumber I'm in, his absence stabs my heart.