11. Kristin
11
KRISTIN
G od bless poker night. The kids’ emotions had been all over the damn place for the last week, and I needed a reprieve.
The weekend had been hell. The inn was booked to capacity as tourists soaked up the last of the summer heat. The warm temperatures would last until October, but the nights were chilly, and currents were bringing in colder water from the Atlantic.
I loved the change of seasons in North Carolina—especially living on the coast. Our beaches didn’t look like those on palm tree and conch shell postcards. Instead, mangrove trees mixed with pines and oaks kept watch over our coastline. We could dig our toes in the warm sand and enjoy the vivid oranges and reds as the leaves changed.
The leaves wouldn’t change for almost another month and a half, but a girl could still get excited.
Call me basic, but I loved autumn. The North Carolina State Fair took place every October in Raleigh and going to it was a family tradition.
Even though I couldn’t buy the kids a lot of gifts for holidays, I did pinch pennies throughout the year so we could afford the fair. We would go on Can Day, bringing non-perishables that would be donated to charities in exchange for free entry to the fair.
On the fridge at home, we kept a countdown marking off the days until fair day. It was right around the corner, I could almost taste the massive smoked turkey legs and cobs of roasted corn slathered in butter.
The start of the week reminded me that Will would be checking out on Friday.
I missed seeing him today since I had the day off. Part of why I’d scheduled so much overtime lately had been to see him more often. But I was still human and needed time to recuperate.
Will texted me around lunchtime and asked if I was okay. Apparently, having another housekeeper checking on his room had been a cause for concern.
I tried to ignore the butterflies that stirred up. It disappointed me a little bit when he didn’t mention our hypothetical date like he usually did.
He probably decided I was too much trouble.
I didn’t play hard to get to be cruel. I just didn’t want to give him the impression this thing between us could go anywhere. We had a fun flirtationship and nothing more.
The room hummed with conversation as poker night got into full swing. Everyone had a drink in hand and something to eat.
We kept things casual with cheap pizza and disposable plates. Luca complained about it every single week. Apparently five dollar hot-and-ready pizzas didn’t compare to his boujee homemade version.
I was simply happy that I didn’t have to cook one night out of the week.
I didn’t bother getting a babysitter for poker nights. Logan and Kylie were old enough to hold down the fort for a few hours, and both had phones in case of an emergency. I never stayed out too late or too long.
Girls’ night was a different story. When I knew I would be tipsy, I made sure the kids had proper adult supervision.
Luca’s big, tattooed arm appeared in front of me. In his hand was a glass filled with something light pink and fruity. He offered it to me.
Ever since I stopped fangirling and had an actual conversation with him, Luca and I had sort of become pals. I looked at him like the big brother I never had. Apparently, my penchant for drinking three-dollar wine repulsed him. So, he had made it his mission to craft a cocktail that I loved.
I plucked the glass out of his hand and examined it. “What am I drinking tonight, DeRossi?”
Luca crossed his arms over his chest. “A watermelon cosmopolitan, extra lime, and a maraschino for some flair.”
I eyed his masterpiece. “I will admit, she’s a beautiful drink. I’m sorry that I’m going to down it in a quarter of the time it took you to make it.”
He started slaving away on the drink the moment I arrived at his and Maddie’s house, claiming it was going to be the winner.
“Bottom’s up, cupcake.” He grinned. “Tell me what you think.”
I clinked my martini glass against Hannah Jane’s old fashioned and took a sip.
S weet heavenly alcohols that was good.
“Well?” Luca asked, wearing a shit-eating grin.
I cocked an eyebrow and gave it a stern look. “It’s acceptable.”
Luca threw his head back and let loose a howl of laughter. “Come on, Kris! When are you gonna finally admit that I can make a damn good cocktail?”
I smiled and downed a healthy gulp. It was sweet and sour but still had a little bite. I could barely taste the alcohol, which seemed dangerous. “Can you make this by the gallon? ”
Luca beamed. “I knew you liked it, smart ass.”
I plucked the maraschino cherry from the glass and popped it in my mouth. “Might be my favorite one yet.” If he knew I wanted to bathe in this stuff, the custom drinks might stop coming.
“How are things going with Will?” Hannah Jane asked, draining the last drops of her old fashioned.
Without missing a beat, Isaac took her empty glass and slid a fresh drink into her hand. He then promptly retreated to the other side of the man cave, where the boys watched preseason football.
“Things with Will aren’t going at all,” I said, eyeing her over my cocktail. “He’s just a guest at the inn. Not to mention, he’ll be checking out in a few days.”
My stomach turned over at the thought. Sure, I’d grown fond of guests and families staying at the inn—like the Johnsons and their two little ones from two summers ago. But I never got attached. Not like this anyway. I didn’t usually miss guests when they left.
And I had missed Will all weekend. He wasn’t at the inn on Saturday when I cleaned his room. On Sunday, I was so busy with checkouts that I had to breeze through his room instead of spending extra time with him.
Hannah smirked. “Girl. I work there too, and I’m not blind. Will looks at you the way I look at shoes.”
Heat flooded my cheeks.
“Aww!” Mel cooed. “She’s blushing!”
I downed the rest of my drink and prayed Luca would be willing to make me another.
“See,” Hannah said, pointing at me. “This is why Isaac and I snuck around as long as we could.”
I snorted. “You sucked at being sneaky.”
“And you suck at pretending you’re not completely into Will.”
I pushed away from the couch and snagged a bottle of water from the fridge behind the bar. “He’s way too old for me. ”
“Oh, please,” Maddie said, rolling her eyes. “Age is just a number.”
“Yeah,” I snapped with more force than I intended. “And there are a bunch of numbers between our ages.”
From the corner of my eye, I noticed Bridget slipping out of the double doors that led to Maddie and Luca’s own personal beachfront.
A moment later, Chase got up from his seat in front of the television and tossed his paper plate in the trash. Without a word, he slipped between the French doors and followed Bridget outside.
No one else seemed to notice, so I kept my mouth shut. Chase and Bridget needed to talk things out. The tension between them was starting to spill over to the rest of us. Everyone walked around on eggshells. It needed to be resolved.
Bridget had begun wearing her engagement ring. I didn’t know whether it was because everyone finally knew or because Kyle caught her not wearing it.
I saw the kind of reactions girls had when it came to wedding things. Hell, all of Hannah’s brides seemed like they couldn’t wait to run down the aisle.
Bridget seemed unaffected. Indifferent. Almost disappointed.
Chase had been seeing a girl for a few months. According to him, things were casual. Layla would occasionally come around the bar with him but hadn’t been seen since the engagement ring incident.
The sound of footsteps from upstairs drew my attention to the door. A moment later, Steve and Erica came down and joined the group.
“You’re late,” Maddie said from behind the bar. She was busy cleaning up so we could start the first round of poker.
“Sorry,” Erica said, tossing her purse aside. “My parents are in town, and they’re watching Aly tonight. We had to make sure everything was settled. ”
Erica’s relationship with her parents had been rather testy over the years. They had put in the work to mend old fences after a few near-death experiences. I loved that for her, but her restored relationship with them reminded me that I would never let myself have that kind of reconciliation.
Aly was the luckiest little girl. She had four sets of grandparents doting on her. Tom and Evelyn Daniels, Steve’s former in-laws, spoiled the shit out of her as if she was their own granddaughter. It was a beautiful thing to watch.
Steve wrapped his arms around his wife and pulled her back against his chest. Erica looked up at him like he hung the moon and stars.
“DeRossi, Lawson,” Steve said, nodding in their direction. “Welcome back.”
Steve Pelham was a man of few words. Hell, that greeting alone was the most cordial he had been to Isaac, well, ever. His bride had softened him up.
Erica whispered something in his ear. He looked around and shook his head.
“Bee here yet?” Steve asked. “Where’s Chase? I saw his truck out front.”
The group looked around the room in confusion.
“I think Bridget stepped outside,” I said, feeling a sudden urge to buy them a few more seconds together.
Maddie and Hannah Jane shared a conspiratorial look.
“You mind tracking them down?” Maddie asked me, tossing her hair over her shoulder.
The back of my neck prickled as a wave of suspicion washed over me. They were up to something. The look they shared gave me the sneaking suspicion that they wanted to talk about something, but needed me out of the room.
Probably just them coordinating who would bring suspiciously timely “leftovers” to my house next .
Quietly, I slipped through the French doors, not bothering with my shoes. The air was crisp, but the sand under my feet was still warm. I looked around for Bridget, but I didn’t see her.
Moonlight glistened over the still water. The high tide left only a sliver of beach between the grass and where the water lapped the sand. There weren’t many places for Chase and Bridget to go.
Movement caught my attention. Beams of light from inside the house illuminated Chase’s broad shoulders. He was walking down the beach toward a figure sitting in the sand.
Bridget stood up when she saw him. She dusted the sand off the back of her faded jeans and wrapped her arms across her waist. She was still in her black and red Jokers tank top and had to be cold.
“Hey,” she said quietly. “Is it time for poker?”
Chase shrugged and stuffed his hands in his pockets. “I just figured I’d come find you. Haven’t seen you in a while…” He dug the toe of his work boots into the sand.
Bridget ran her fingers back through her honey blonde hair and tossed it to the side.
I almost turned around and went back inside, not wanting to intrude. Curiosity got the better of me.
“Are you really going to marry him?” Chase asked. His raspy words were laced with heartache.
Bridget didn’t say anything at first. She dropped her hands in front of her and clasped them together. “Yeah,” she whispered absently. “I am.”
Chase shook his head and turned away from her, walking until his boots hit the water. “So that’s it?” He laughed sarcastically, pulling his Carhartt ball cap up before running his hand over his short buzz of dark hair. “I don’t even get a chance?”
“What am I supposed to do, Chase?” Bridget sounded exasperated as she sided up to him. “Never get married? Is that what you’re saying? ”
Chase turned to her.
Do it, Chase! Kiss the hell out of her! I silently cheered for him to do what he should have done years ago.
But he didn’t.
Because sometimes, life is cruel and the good guy doesn’t get the girl.
“I’m saying I’m not okay with losing my best friend,” he choked out. The words barely made it through his gritted teeth.
Bridget shook her head. “Steve is?—”
“Don’t even start with that bullshit, darlin’,” Chase snapped. “I love Steve like a brother, but don’t pretend like you and I haven’t been best friends since we were kids.” He laughed at the black sky and shook his head. “But apparently, that doesn’t mean anything. You didn’t even have the guts to tell me your piece of shit boyfriend fucking proposed, and you said yes.”
“I love him,” Bridget whispered. Her voice was a little stronger—more resolved—as she added, “And this is the next step for us.”
Chase took a step forward, his boots hitting the toe of Bridget’s. “How can you possibly think that a jackass like that is worthy of someone like you?” Chase slid his hand onto her hip and rested his forehead on hers. “I would be good to you.”
His eleventh-hour confession was quiet. Only the crickets and frogs were there to witness it. And me.
I expected Bridget to push him away, but she didn’t. Instead, she rested her temple on his chest and closed her eyes. She swiped a stray tear off her cheek and swallowed. “What happened to you being happy for me?”
Chase wrapped his arms around her, cradling her head against his chest. He buried his nose in her hair. I could barely hear it when he asked, “Why do you want to marry someone like him?”
Silence lingered between them for a few moments.
I didn’t want Bridget to catch me lurking, so I stepped out of the shadow, dragging my feet so that I wouldn’t spook them .
Bridget pulled away from Chase’s hug and met my eyes.
“Time for poker?” she asked. Her voice was thin and her face had drained of color.
I nodded. “Yeah. They sent me out here to find y’all.”
With weary eyes and a vacant expression, Chase shoved his hands in his pockets and trudged back into the house. His shoulders sagged like they carried the weight of the world.
Back inside, everyone gathered around the poker table. Chase and Bridget sat with Mel between them rather than across from one another.
“So,” Steve said casually as he dealt the cards. He glanced to his left where Erica was sitting. “Erica and I, uh, have some news. Wanted to wait until everyone was here before we said anything.” He cut his eyes to Isaac and Luca.
They both knew they were being called out for traveling so much. Maddie and Hannah Jane seemed rather pleased with the admonition.
Steve finished dealing the cards and sat back. He draped his muscular arm across the back of Erica’s chair, mindlessly tracing his fingertips on her shoulder.
Everyone gathered their cards and waited with bated breath.
Erica beamed from ear-to-ear. “I’m pregnant again. We’re going to have another baby.” She let out a nervous giggle as everyone shared simultaneous gasps and peals of excitement.
Steve grinned behind that thick beard of his, staring at Erica with adoring eyes. He pulled her into his side and planted a kiss on top of her head.
For as long as I had known Steve and his first wife, Heather, he’d always wanted a big family. Aly would be a year old in a few months. And now, another one was on the way. My heart swelled at the sight of his and Erica’s happiness.
“Aww! You guys!” I cupped my hands over my mouth. “I’m so excited for y’all! I can’t believe it! ”
The girls practically exploded out of their seats and tackled Erica in a dog-pile hug.
Steve sat back, looking rather smug. He looked scary as fuck, but the man was a big teddy bear inside.
Chase punched Steve’s arm and grinned. “Look at you! So, that’s why Erica’s family is in town?”
Steve nodded. “Wanted to tell them in person.”
“Do you want a boy or a girl?” Mel asked as everyone settled down.
Erica shrugged and picked her cards back up, letting one hand rest absently on her belly. “I don’t have a preference. I can see Aly doing great with a brother or a sister.”
Maddie rolled her eyes. “Oh, please. Expectant mothers always say they don’t care if it's a boy or a girl. We all know you would pick if you could.”
Erica giggled. “I really don’t care.” She paused then looked up at Steve. “But I hope it's a boy.”
Steve looked rather pleased with himself.
Maddie snorted. “If anyone can make a boy” — she pointed toward Steve — “it’s that pile of testosterone right there. Way to knock her up, Pelham.”
Steve crossed his arms over his broad chest and smirked. “Fuck yeah, I put a baby in my woman.”
Erica rolled her eyes at his neanderthal antics, but I didn’t miss the way she wiggled into his side.
On their side of the table, Luca leaned over and whispered something in Maddie’s ear that made her laugh. He slid his hand over her flat stomach and let it linger as they whispered.
Holy shit, was she pregnant, too? I considered the possibility but noticed the glass of wine in her hand. Maddie was wild, but never irresponsible. Maybe they had started talking about having kids.
Married or not, how did someone even broach that big of a topic with someone else ?
“Y'all need anything?” I asked, suddenly feeling smothered by all the happiness. I placed my cards face down and slid my chair out from the table. “I’m gonna grab something to drink.”
No one spoke up, so I walked over to the bar and dug around the fridge, looking for something to take the edge off. Since I was driving myself home, I settled for a Coke.
I loved seeing my friends so happy. I wanted good things to rain down on them like a freaking hurricane. But when I looked over my shoulder at the group piled around the table, I couldn’t help but feel left behind.
In truth, I was being left behind. And it would be that way until Zoey was old enough to be on her own.
Life moved so quickly for everyone except me.
And babies… I saw the way Steve looked at Erica. It was possessive. Primal. Good men like that didn’t want a partner like me who had no interest in having children.
Before I got custody of the kids, I used to go on dates and mention that I wanted to start a family someday. The guys always ran for the hills. But go on a date and say you don’t want kids, and the reaction was the same. Apparently, not wanting to procreate was some kind of red flag.
My phone buzzed in my back pocket. I pulled it out and smiled at Will’s name on the screen.
Will
Thinking about you, Sunshine. Hope you’re having a good night. I’ll be up late, so in the event you think about calling me, I’ll definitely answer.
He was such a good man. My stomach lurched. I didn’t want to say the words out loud, but a good man at his stage in life would want a family. What interest would he possibly have in a twenty-five-year-old saddled with four kids and calloused emotional scars?