Chapter 2 #2
Jo shifted a little, her fingers lightly brushing the inside of Amelia’s wrist. “Thank you,” Jo whispered, unaware of who she’d given herself to. “I really mean that.”
A deep ache settled in Amelia’s chest. She had spent the last six months wondering if she could confess everything, and even now, she still didn’t know the answers.
Instead, she pressed a kiss to Jo’s hair, lingering as she inhaled her scent.
God, she’d craved a moment like this. “You’re so beautiful. ”
She recalled the years she’d known Jo, watching her in the kitchen with Callum.
She had always seemed so bright and full of life.
Amelia had told herself it was only admiration, that what she felt was some strange maternal pride along with happiness for the woman her son had chosen to be with, but when the breakup came—so ugly and desperately sad—Amelia had mourned the loss of Jo in her daily life far more than she cared to admit.
Yes, they still met up now and then for coffee, but this was where she wanted to be with Jo.
If she couldn’t have anything deep and meaningful with her, then she would allow herself this.
Jo sat up a little, and though Amelia couldn’t see her face, she knew she was smiling. “Can I take off the blindfold now?”
Panic rose throughout Amelia. She had been coming into this room for many years now, so why did she wonder if Jo would be able to make out her facial features? She couldn’t, it wasn’t even possible to see a hand in front of her face, but the darkness had a funny way of playing tricks with you.
“Of course.” Amelia was careful to keep the tone of voice she’d used when Jo entered the room. It was clear she hadn’t realised who it was speaking, and if that kept the mystery for a while longer, then Amelia would do whatever she could to maintain this…alter ego. “This is your first time here?”
“It is,” Jo said into the darkness, her voice as soft as ever. “I couldn’t have picked anyone better to experience my first time here with.”
Amelia let her hand wander over Jo’s bare thigh, her skin still hot to the touch. For a moment, she allowed herself to pretend that this was okay. That Jo was hers, no lines had been crossed, and no consequences were on the horizon.
But reality quickly set in again. Amelia had always been the careful one.
The quiet one. She’d watched Jo fall in love with her son, and then she’d watched him break her heart, never daring to be forthcoming with how she felt.
But here, in the darkness, she found Jo’s lips again.
The kiss was gentle, lingering…and Amelia was savouring what she knew she may never have again.
This impossible moment with Jo Bleasdale.
Jo pressed closer, her hand wrapped around the back of Amelia’s neck as she kissed her with a little more fire this time. When she drew back, she whispered, “I feel like I know you.” God, that voice…those lips. Could Amelia be honest? Jo sighed. “Even though I don’t.”
Maybe you do, Amelia wanted to speak that out loud, but the consequences remained firm in her mind. If she did come clean, Jo would probably cut contact with her. Lately, coffee with Jo was the only thing she looked forward to. “Will you be here again?”
Jo smiled against Amelia’s lips and said, “What do you think?”
She enjoyed it more than I thought she would.
Amelia didn’t know what to do with that information.
Would Jo be back here solely for her again, or was she happy to give herself to anyone who was in this room?
Jo didn’t seem like that kind of person, but what did Amelia know?
She had only been the woman who had admired her from afar for several years. “I’d like to see you in here again…”
Silence settled over them as they held one another, wrapped up in the shadows…
and now secrets. Amelia memorised the feel of Jo’s body against her, the taste of her skin, the tightening of her walls as she came undone around Amelia’s fingers.
A shiver ghosted up her spine, and then came the disconnection as Jo slipped out of Amelia’s arms. “Maybe you will.”
And just like that…Jo was gone, walking out of the curtain and leaving Amelia alone in the dark. Only this time, the room seemed darker and far lonelier than it ever had before. If she closed her eyes and focused, Amelia could still hear Jo’s breathy moans as she writhed and arched beneath her.
Amelia sat painfully still, letting the cool air in the room brush over her flushed skin.
She wished she’d said what she wanted to say.
What she needed to say. She lifted a trembling hand and touched her lips to where Jo had just kissed her.
She could still taste her. She could still feel the sensation of Jo’s arms wrapped around her in the dark.
So many years of wanting her, pushing it down, hiding it all away… it had just grown exponentially.
Tonight had been reckless, and to many, it would have been unforgiveable.
But Amelia hadn’t been able to stop herself the moment Jo shivered under the touch of her fingertips.
She knew what Jo had been going through since the split, and she had wanted to comfort her.
To remind her that she was beautiful, and that Callum had never known what he had when he was with Jo.
She’d wanted to make her feel cherished and wanted.
Amelia had also selfishly wanted to take something for herself, too.
And Jo had given it so freely. She had put her trust in the person behind the curtain.
Amelia pressed the heels of her hands to her eyes, willing her tears to remain at bay.
It would be the easiest thing in the world to rush out after Jo, to stand before her and tell her it had been Amelia in this room.
To say…I wanted you, and I always have. But that would shatter everything between them, and Amelia wasn’t willing to risk it.
It had been a fantasy for Jo, the unknown of the dark room in the club, and Amelia would be wise to remember that.
Above all else, Jo was vulnerable. She was hurting. The last thing Amelia wanted was to confuse her and make her question what had happened in the room. To…question herself. None of that was necessary. Not right now.
And so, Amelia had decided. She wouldn’t tell Jo.
Not yet, and maybe not ever. Jo was on a journey of discovering a new life for herself, and Amelia owed her the space to find what she was looking for.
Tonight was a secret she would keep close to her chest. But even as she tried to convince herself, Amelia knew she would replay every moment of this night for a long time to come.
Every touch, every gasp, every whispered word.
She rose to her feet and dressed in silence, moving slowly as she mulled over everything in her mind.
When she finally stepped out into the hallway, choosing to exit via a side door, the cold immediately gave her some kind of clarity.
She felt lighter as the cool air brushed her face, her clammy palms beginning to settle down.
And as she turned for the direction of home, she promised herself that she would keep Jo safe from this secret. At least…for now.