Chapter Twelve
November 2014, Canterbury, Kent, England
Molly strode off the train and over the bridge onto the platform the other side. She swiped her ticket through the barrier and walked to her car. In the dark car park, she felt a thump on her arm. She struggled as the hooded figure tried to grab her bag, before hitting her in the face. She screamed at him, but no sound came out. He pulled the bag from her shoulder, shoving her onto the cold ground. Shards of gravel scratched her palms as she tried to stop herself from falling onto her face. Clutching her bleeding hands, she screamed again but the man was already gone. She ran to her car crying, fumbling in her pocket for her car keys. A voice was calling her name, but she couldn’t see where it was coming from.
With a thump she woke up. She was laying on her bedroom floor, and her duvet was in a heap next to her, along with her pillow.
‘Molly, are you OK? What happened?’ Chris was standing in her doorway, his eyes bleary, his hair sticking up. The light from the moon shone through the window, illuminating them both.
She groaned. ‘A nightmare. It happens sometimes.’
He walked over to her, and held out his hand, pulling her to her feet before helping her put the duvet back on her bed.
‘It’s usually worse when I’m tired, but I keep getting mugged over and over again in my sleep.’ She picked up the glass of water from her bedside table and took a sip.
‘Will you be alright now? Do you want me to stay?’ He leant against the doorframe; his brow furrowed with concern.
‘No, it’s fine. I”ll go right back to sleep.’ She sat down on the bed and rubbed her face.
He nodded to the heavy velvet curtains. ‘I don”t pull my curtains either.’
She yawned. ‘I like to look at the stars.’
‘Me too.’ He walked over to the window. ‘The view from here is stunning.’
She felt like she was still dreaming. Chris was bathed in the moonlight, staring out of her window. Her heart was still beating so fast she thought it would fly out of her chest, and she took some deep breaths. Every time she closed her eyes, she was back in the station car park, the gravel scratching her face.
‘Chris,’ she whispered. ‘I’m scared.’
‘I’m right here,’ he said. ‘Do you want me to stay?’
‘Yes,’ she replied, unable to fight any longer. She needed him. Her eyes felt heavy, but she was afraid to close them.
‘Sure. I can do that.’ He climbed onto the other side of the bed, and shuffled the pillow so that he could sit up, leaning against the headboard.
‘Thank you.’ She lay down, closing her eyes and listening to the rhythm of his breathing. ‘Night.’
***
Molly woke up in the morning and stretched her legs. She rolled over and came face to face with a sleeping Chris. ‘Shit!’ she squeaked.
It came flooding back to her. The nightmare, his calm, patient tone, his reluctance to leave her. He hadn’t got into the duvet; instead, he was laying on top of it, his tracksuit trousers and T-shirt crumpled. Her breath caught in her throat. After last night, she wasn’t sure if she saw him as a friend anymore, or if she ever had. Her heart skipped happily as his eyes opened and he smiled at her.
‘Morning,’ he said, sleepily. ‘How are you doing?’ His brow creased with concern.
‘I’m fine,’ she said, and a pang of guilt and embarrassment washed over her. ‘I’m so sorry about last night. Did you get any sleep?’
‘Yeah, I slept really well.’ He climbed off the bed. ‘I should uh, let you get dressed.’
‘Let me get you a towel, so you can take a shower.’ She hurried down the hall to the bathroom and pulled a large towel out of the airing cupboard, hanging it on the heated towel rail and then went back into the bedroom. ‘I’ve put a towel out on the rail to heat up for you. Help yourself to whatever you need in there.’
‘I’ve got shower gel and a change of clothes in my gym bag; I’ll just go and grab them. Are you sure you don’t want a shower first?’ he asked as he climbed off the bed.
She shook her head. ‘No, I’m good. Help yourself.’
The quicker she could get him out of her bedroom, the better. His aftershave lingered in her hair and on her skin, and she couldn’t stop staring at his toned arms, imagining them wrapped around her.
While Chris showered, Molly went downstairs, and cleaned and tidied every bit of the kitchen , trying to distract herself from the embarrassment she felt about the previous night. When she heard the shower switch off, she put the kettle on. She got two mugs out of the cupboard, just as Chris walked into the kitchen.
‘Hey,’ she said. ‘Did you enjoy the pink bathroom?’
‘Yeah,’ he said, ‘it was like showering in Barbie’s dream house. It’s cool.’
She laughed. ‘It is cool. I love it. Do you want a tea, coffee, some breakfast?’
‘I could definitely go for one of those rooibos teas again,’ he said. ‘It’s Saturday, right? You said you make poached eggs for Saskia on a Saturday. Would you let me do that for you?’
She filled the kettle and put a teabag into each mug. ‘You don’t have to do that. I invited you over here and ruined your sleep.’
‘I slept just fine,’ he said gently. ‘Don’t worry about me. You had a rough night. Why don’t you let me do this for you?’
It had been a long time since anyone had taken care of her, and the kindness of his gesture took her by surprise. She poured the hot water and a slosh of milk into their tea and handed him a mug.
‘I’d like that,’ she said. ‘Shall I show you where everything is?’
‘Sure,’ he said, looking around. ‘I get the feeling that everything has its place in this kitchen.’
‘You would be right,’ she replied and pulled out a frying pan from a large drawer under the hob.
As Chris cooked the poached eggs - a lot more expertly than she ever could - her embarrassment dissipated. He was funny, and down to earth, and he made her feel relaxed.
‘We’re good to go,’ he said, carefully putting the poached eggs on top of the toast. ‘Where’s the cutlery?’
‘I’ll get it,’ she replied and pulled some cutlery out of the drawer, as he took the plates to the dining table. ‘Thank you so much for this,’ she said as she sat down opposite him. She cut into the egg, the yolk running down over her toast.
‘Wow, these are miles better than the ones I make Saskia.’
‘I’ve had a lot of practice. Scott likes poached eggs too.’ He cut into his own eggs, nodding approvingly. ‘These are decent actually. I’ve had a lot of disasters.’
‘Me too.’ she shook her head. ‘We usually just laugh it off and try again.’
‘Same!’ He smiled at her.
‘Thank you for last night, I must have scared the life out of you.’ She winced. ‘My bedroom’s right above the living room as you probably gathered.’
‘It’s not a problem.’ His eyes locked onto hers. ‘I couldn’t have left you. I was worried about you.’
Her chest tightened. He was worried about her. He cared about her. And that was…confusing.
‘I appreciate you staying. I was so scared to go back to sleep.’
‘You’ve gone through a rough patch and it’s something that will take time to get over.’ He dipped some toast into the runny egg yolk. ‘If I can make it easier in any way, then I will.’
‘You’re so selfless,’ she said, her heart pounding.
Even though they were fully clothed, being sat here with him felt very intimate. They both had casual clothes on, they’d spent the night in the same bed and he’d cooked for her. Alarm bells started ringing in her head, but she ignored them.
‘Not always,’ he replied, ‘but I like you and I knew you needed someone to look out for you last night.’
‘Why isn’t it awkward between us?’ she asked. ‘It’s like we already knew each other.’
‘I feel the same way,’ he replied. ‘I felt comfortable with you from the moment I met you.’
She held his gaze for just a second, admiring the flecks of blue in his eyes. She still thought he was hot, but now that she actually knew him, his good looks weren’t the only thing that was drawing him to her. Frightened by her feelings, she picked up Chris’s empty plate and stacked it on top of hers.
‘When I spoke to Saskia last night, she wasn’t even surprised that you were here. I would never ask anyone to come over ordinarily. I’d just pretend I was fine, even if I wasn’t.’
‘You don’t have to pretend with me,’ he said.
‘I don’t feel the need to pretend with you,’ she said, and she knew immediately why. ‘You listen to me, rather than telling me to get over it.’
‘Anyone who does that isn’t worth your time or energy, Molly,’ he said. ‘I’d never treat you like that.’
The look in his eyes unnerved her. They had darkened, as if he was angry with someone, and his need to protect, or shield her, made her heart skip a beat. But he wasn’t hers, and she wasn’t his. ‘I know you wouldn’t,’ she said, unable to tear her gaze away from him.
He finished the last of his tea. ‘Can I help you clear up?’
She shook her head. ‘Thank you, but that’s my favourite part. I might hate cooking, but I love cleaning.’
‘Why doesn’t that surprise me?’ He laughed. ‘I’m gonna go, but if you want me to come back later, I can.’
‘Don’t feel like you have to,’ she said. ‘I’m gonna clean the house, go to the supermarket, you know, all the boring stuff that Saskia doesn’t like doing.’
He smiled. ‘That sounds familiar. Scott seems to think that food should just appear in the fridge.’ He paused. ‘Do you want go out for a drink tonight?’
She considered it for a second. ‘Yes,’ she said. ‘Yes, I want to go out. I’m sick of being afraid to do anything. I’ve not been out for a drink since Halloween.’
‘Right.’ He sipped his tea. ‘That was an interesting night.’
‘I don’t want to get that drunk.’ She wrinkled her nose.
It had taken her far too long to get over that night and she’d also further embarrassed herself with Chris while dressed in her slinky costume.
‘You don’t have to drink anything,’ he replied. ‘We can go to Mimosa if you want. Alex messaged me earlier asking to meet up tonight.’
‘I don’t want to gate crash,’ she said cautiously.
He shook his head. ‘No, it’s fine. Kate’s coming too. If you’d rather do something else – or nothing – that’s also fine, obviously.’
She stared into his slate grey eyes. ‘No, I’d like to come, that sounds good.’ She would just keep her distance from him.
He put his empty mug down on the table. ‘Do you want to get dinner too, or just go straight to Mimosa?’
She bit her lip. The city would be full of people, and it would be dark, and cold, but she wouldn’t be alone. She would be with someone who would protect her.
‘I think we should get dinner too.’
‘Great, he said, then paused. ‘Do you want to book somewhere? I’ll eat anything. I’m not fussy.’
‘Me neither,’ Molly said. ‘We always go to the Thai restaurant, so I’ll pick somewhere different.’
‘Sounds great,’ he said and walked out into the hall, picking up his bag. ‘Let me know what time to come over.’
‘I’ll see you later,’ she said. ‘If you get a better offer for tonight, don’t worry, I’ve got a ton of films to watch.’
‘I’ve made plans with you.’ He put on his jacket. ‘Even if I was inundated with offers – which I’m not - I’ve said we’ll go out and I always keep my promises.’
I bet you do, she thought to herself. She knew him. He was honest, kind, and good. As he opened the front door, the sun’s rays streamed in, bathing him in a golden glow. She sighed. It was fitting. He was her guardian angel.
‘I’ll see you later.’
She waved him off and shut the door, walking into the living room, and flopping onto the sofa, which still smelt of his aftershave.
She picked up her phone and rang Saskia, wondering if she was awake.
Saskia answered, a mumbled hello. ‘Morning Mole, how are you doing today? How was last night?’
Molly could imagine her sister wiggling her eyebrows suggestively.
‘It was nice. We watched a couple of films, he fell asleep on the sofa, and he’s just left.’
She didn’t tell Saskia about her nightmare. Last night’s one was the worst one she’d had so far. She’d never thrown herself out of bed before.
‘How boring. I was hoping you were going to tell me you lured him into your bedroom and had your wicked way with him.’
‘Saskia! We’re friends.’ This was a blatant lie, but Saskia couldn’t see Molly’s face and so she hoped she would get away with it.
‘Hmmm. Are you though?’ Saskia’s reply was blunt as usual.
‘Yes. We’re friends. He’s funny and kind and we just get on.’ Molly kept her tone as neutral as possible.
‘What have you got planned tonight?’ Saskia asked. ‘We’re going out for drinks after the rehearsal and getting sushi.’
‘That sounds brilliant! I’m going out for dinner with Chris, then meeting Kate and Alex at Mimosa,’ Molly replied.
‘Oh man! That means you’ll get to see Scott,’ Saskia said, her voice heavy with sadness. ‘Can you give him a squeeze and a kiss from me. No tongues though.’
‘Hilarious. Of course I will.’ Molly smiled. ‘Have a great time. I’ll come up for a night out once you’re settled in.’
‘Yes, Mole! You’ll love it.’ Saskia squealed. ‘Caro is desperate to get to know you. We’ve hit it off big time. We’re so similar. I think she’s actually more chaotic than me.’
‘I’m so glad,’ Molly replied, feeling a pang of jealousy. She and Saskia had always been inseparable; but they were nothing alike. ‘Count me in. I’ll speak to you tomorrow. Love you.’
‘Love you.’ Saskia paused. ‘Be careful.’
‘Same.’ Molly smiled. ‘Be careful too.’
***
Chris left Molly”s and drove straight to his parents” house. He parked on the gravel drive and walked up to the front door. The bricks were old and faded, and a honeysuckle bush curved into an arch around the porch. The front door swung open just as he reached it.
‘Hello mate, I saw your car. How are you?’ His dad, Bill, ran a hand through his light grey hair as he let Chris into the house.
‘Have you been to the gym?’ Bill asked, eyeing Chris’s crumpled tracksuit.
‘Uh…yes,’ Chris said.
He didn’t like lying to his parents, but the truth was too complicated.
Bill shook his head. ‘So predictable.’
If only you knew,Chris thought to himself. He walked into the living room.
‘Hi, Mum.’
‘Morning, darling!’
His mum, Anne, was sat on the rug in front of the fireplace, doing a jigsaw puzzle on a wooden board.
‘I’m still stuck on your birthday present.’
‘Good.’ Chris grinned and sat down next to her. ‘I thought it would keep you out of trouble.’
‘You were right.’ She leant over and gave Chris a kiss on the cheek, her dark brown curls brushing against his face. She turned to Bill. ‘Are you going to help me with this jigsaw?’
He wrinkled his nose. ‘I need to find my glasses first.’ He walked out of the room, just as Scott came in.
‘Alright mate,’ he said, grinning at Chris.
Chris shook his head. ‘What are you doing here?’
‘Brought some beer samples up here for Dad.’ Scott sat down on the sofa. ‘And he made me breakfast.’ He gestured to the plate of toast he was holding, then sat down on the sofa. ‘Did you eat at Molly’s, or do you want some breakfast?’
Anne looked up from her jigsaw. ‘Why did you stay at Molly’s?’ She raised her eyebrow.
Scott gave Chris a meaningful look, then took a bite of his toast.
‘She…uh, she needed a friend. Saskia’s gone and she’s still pretty vulnerable.’
Chris and Scott had both told their parents about Molly and Saskia, and while Chris had made it clear that he and Molly were just friends, he got the impression they didn’t believe him. He’d sent Scott a message before he went to bed last night, letting him know where he was, and he regretted that too. With his parents and his brother, his private life never stayed private.
‘She’s lucky to have such a good friend,’ Anne said.
Chris wasn’t fooled. He knew her words weren’t as innocent as they seemed.
‘Yes, and so am I. She made me some awesome rocky road and we watched an old film. High Society. Do you know it?’
‘Oh yes.’ Anne nodded. ‘Seems pretty apt if you ask me. I’ll go and put the kettle on.’
Chris groaned and turned to Scott. ‘Why are you trying to make my life harder? I don’t want Mum knowing about Molly and me.’
‘So there is a Molly and you, is there?’ Scott raised his eyebrow. ‘Has she split up with her boyfriend?’
‘I didn’t mean it like that,’ Chris said. ‘I meant I don’t want them interfering. They won’t understand and they’ll think there’s more to it than there actually is.’
‘I’m going to ask you one question.’ Scott folded his arms. ‘Where did you sleep last night?’
Chris ran a hand through his hair. He couldn’t lie to Scott. He never had. But telling the truth would provoke a lot more questions.
‘I slept on her bed. I was asleep on her sofa, then she had a nightmare and fell out of bed, which woke me up. When I went upstairs, she looked terrified so I stayed with her and slept on her bed.’
Scott nodded. ‘You want to look after her. It’s what you do. I don’t want you to get hurt. You’ve always been there for me. I’m trying to do the same thing for you.’
Chris nodded. ‘I appreciate it, but there’s nothing to worry about. Molly’s having a hard time right now and she needs a friend.’
‘She’s got a boyfriend.’ Scott blurted out. ‘I’m worried about you.’
‘You don’t need to worry about me,’ Chris said, just as his mum walked back into the room.
Anne eyed them with suspicion. ‘Well, this is a lovely, tense atmosphere. What’s going on?’
‘I feel like I’m watching a train crash happening right in front of me.’ Scott turned to Chris. ‘This isn’t like you. Molly has a boyfriend, and you are far too involved in her life.’
‘Yes, and he isn’t.’ Chris said through gritted teeth. ‘He’s never there for her. I am. I make her feel safe. She needs me. I can’t get hurt if she never finds out how I feel.’
Swallowing his feelings for her was painful, but he would do it because she needed him to.
Anne’s bright blue eyes locked onto Chris’s. ‘Darling, is this what you want? You deserve to be happy, not breaking your heart over someone you can’t have.’
It’s too late, he thought to himself.
‘It doesn’t matter how I feel about her because she can’t ever know.’
‘Do you think she’s got feelings for you?’ Scott asked.
‘I don’t know.’ Chris shrugged.
He had a feeling that Molly felt the same way, but he was too scared to consider what that might mean.
‘I know what I’m doing.’
This was a complete lie. He’d never felt so out of control in his life.
‘I should be keeping out of this,’ Anne said, ‘but I just want to say that relationships are complicated, and sometimes the lines between friends and lovers become blurred before you even realise it. You might know what you’re doing, but does Molly?’
‘Look, I know she has a boyfriend and I wouldn’t do anything to jeopardise that relationship,’ Chris said. ‘Last night we watched a film and fell asleep on her sofa. It was all totally above board.’
Apart from the thoughts he’d had of pulling her into his arms and holding her so tightly she forgot her fears.
‘Fine.’ Scott sighed. ‘I won’t say anything else. Are you coming out tonight? Alex messaged me earlier. Has he contacted you?’
Chris nodded. ‘Yeah, I’ll be out. I’m getting some dinner with Molly first, then we’ll come to the bar.’
Scott put his head in his hands. ‘This is such a dangerous game you’re playing mate. I hope you know that.’