37. Chapter Thirty-Seven
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Margot
I wake to Alex’s soft whisper in my ear. “Wake up, baby. We’re here.”
Blinking a few times, I give my brain time to adjust to what’s going on. Right, okay. Disastrous Thanksgiving dinner at Alex’s house, spontaneous trip to who knows where. Looking out the window, the first thing I see is black meaning it’s still nighttime, we must not have traveled too far, then. The next thing I see is an ocean and next to it, a little bed and breakfast called the Oceanside Inn. Oceanside, New Jersey?
“Where are we?” I ask, groggy from my car nap.
“We’re at the beach. My favorite place.” Alex unbuckles my seatbelt and I slide from the seat.
“That’s nice,” I say, still sleepy. Would it be bad if I just want to crawl into this B&B bed and sleep for twelve hours? Probably . After grabbing our bags from the back seat, Alex grabs my hand, leading me toward the door.
“Checking in for Prescott,” he says to the receptionist, his voice commanding. Sexy. The sound of it wakes me up a bit.
“Oh you late reservers!” The older lady croons. “I always like to pay close attention to the people who book the day of.” She taps a few keys on the keyboard then whispers dramatically toward us. “You’re not running from anything, are ya?”
Alex laughs. “No, ma’m. Just wanted a nice getaway for the weekend.”
“Well, you’ve come to the right place!” She cheers again. Her name tag says Susan.
“Thank you, Susan. We’re excited to be here,” I smile at her and she returns my grin. Susan tells us that we’re staying in room four and that breakfast starts promptly at nine am.
“And happy hour is at four, you don’t wanna miss that,” she winks at me and I hold in my giggle.
“We wouldn’t dream of it,” Alex says with full sincerity. I swear, the way he is with people makes me care for him more and more every day. He’s so genuine and kind. I have no idea how Alex turned out the way he did with his father in charge but I’m eternally grateful that he did.
After insisting three times that we can carry our bags, Susan shows us our room and wishes us a good night. When I turn the light on, the first thing I notice is the bed. A huge four-poster with a canopy and curtains rests in the middle of the room, taking up a large majority of it. The sheets are a pale pink that match the pink wall and pink towels on the dresser.
“Very…” Alex starts.
“Pink,” I finish. “How did you find this place?”
Alex sets our bags down and goes to investigate the bathroom. “A quick google search. I knew I wanted to come to Oceanside, I just didn’t know where to stay.”
Sitting on the bed, I feel the firmness of the mattress underneath me. “And why Oceanside?”
Alex pauses in the doorway from the bathroom. He leans against the wall, deep in thought. “When we were kids, we used to come on vacation here. Some of the best times of my life have been spent on this beach.” His mouth closes and I know the things he’s not saying. Some of the worst times too .
I walk across the room to meet him, shuffling over and placing my hands on his upper arms. “I’m excited for you to show me the beach tomorrow.” Reaching up on my tippy toes, I place a kiss on his nose.
Alex sighs against me, gripping my waist tightly. He rests his forehead against mine and breathes me in. “Did you know you smell like coconut? All the time?”
“Do I?”
Quickly, I mentally catalog all the skincare, hair care and body wash I use and none of them include coconut as an ingredient.
He takes another big whiff. “You smell like the beach.” Alex leans back and meets my eyes. Then he kisses me with a force I didn’t expect but am very welcome to. He moves his hands from my hips to circling my waist and he walks us backward toward the bed as his kiss deepens. When the back of my legs meet resistance, I know we’ve hit the mattress.
“Alex,” I say against his lips. “You know I—”
He stops immediately. “Of course, I’m sorry. I’ll slow down.” He starts to pull away but I grab him tighter, bringing his lips back to mine for a brief, heated moment.
“No, that didn’t mean stop. That meant: be gentle with me.”
He kisses me lighter this time and I can already tell he’s slipping away, wanting to stop this. But I don’t want to stop this. I want to keep going. I want to go all the way. I keep his lips against mine but open my mouth wider to allow his tongue access.
“Margot, wait,” he protests as I sit on the bed, pulling him down so he’s bending to reach me.
“No. No waiting.” Moving back more center onto the firm mattress, I motion for him to join me.
“Are you sure?”
In a moment of desperate vulnerability, I answer truthfully. “I’ve been sure about you for longer than I ever even admitted to myself.”
The tether that was holding Alex to his moral high ground snaps and he launches himself onto the bed, meeting our lips together again. I love the feeling of his full pout against mine. Like we were molded to fit each other.
Laying back, I take Alex’s t-shirt with me over his head and he makes quick work of the button down shirt I’m wearing, each button quicker than the next. I don’t want to think about how much practice he’s had with removing girl’s clothing. Or his expertise at every sex position known to man. Or the fact that his dick has been in—
“Here, baby.” Alex takes my chin in his hand and moves my face so our eyes are linked. “Get out of that beautiful head of yours and look right here.” He nods and I do, too. Once satisfied that I’m fully locked in, he continues to pepper my neck with kisses as he moves his body south down mine. With my buttoned shirt wide open, he has access to every inch of my torso not covered by my bra. And when he gets there…
“A front clasp? Nice,” he cheers, making quick work of that as well. I get no moment to be self-conscious of my bare breasts out on display as he immediately takes one in his mouth and massages the other. The feeling is like nothing I’ve ever felt before.
I throw my head back and bite my lip to keep the sounds from escaping. Alex pinches my chin to release my bottom lip.
“Oh, no. Let it out. I wanna hear you.”
I look down and see Alex’s body raised above mine. God, he is so hot. The type of hot you daydream about. Not the type you actually get to have. With a feral grin, I pull his face to mine and kiss the ever-loving daylights out of him. He moves to unbutton his jeans and slide them off as we kiss. My breath draws as he pulls away, grabbing the condom from this front pocket before throwing his jeans to the floor.
Alex sits back on his heels and looks at me. It takes everything I have not to cover up my chest. “You are so beautiful,” he says, placing a gentle kiss on my lips. “Are you sure about this?”
“Yes. I’m sure about you.”
Alex kisses me again and then makes quick work of my own pants and underwear. Once I’m laid out bare in front of him, it all becomes beautifully, terrifyingly real. I want this man more than I want my next breath but I’m also so scared of that feeling. The feeling of wanting something so badly.
Alex makes his way slowly down my body, kissing every inch of bare skin he comes in contact with. When he gets to that apex of my thighs, he stops. His breath is hot on my center and the feel of that alone almost causes me to be undone. He kisses me there and I see stars, planets, galaxies in my eyes. I’ve never known anything to feel so good. With his name on my lips, I explode into a supernova.
Quickly, as my heart rate softens down to above average, Alex fumbles with the condom. He places himself directly at my center and then props himself up with his hands on either side of my face. He places gentle kisses on my nose and then sighs deeply.
“You absolutely sur—”
Before he can finish the word, I thrust up, connecting our bodies in the ultimate way. Pain skyrockets through me and I stifle a yelp at the unknown intrusion.
“Woah, sunshine.” Alex says as he moves ever so slowly, keeping us connected and allowing my body to get used to the fullness.
Once the pain subsides into pleasure, I moan my reply, the sound furthering his enjoyment. Alex continues to thrust, the movements quickening, quickening until he stops suddenly, a groan rocking through him. He shifts one more time and then collapses to my right, landing on his side and immediately pulling me against him, nose to nose.
“Are you okay?”
“I’m more than okay.”
“You are incredible.”
A cheek-splitting grin forms on my face and Alex matches it. We lay like this, staring into each other’s eyes, for an unknown amount of time. It’s Alex who eventually breaks the silence.
“You need to pee.”
Narrowing my eyebrows, I reply, “How did you know that?”
He laughs, shifting us so that we’re ready to come off the bed. “No, I mean after sex. You need to pee or else you risk the chance of getting a UTI.”
“Look at you, sex expert.”
Sliding off the bed, I grab my shirt and underwear and head toward the bathroom.
“I’m not a sex expert,” Alex shouts from the other side of the door. When I come back inside, he’s disposing of the condom in the garbage before heading to the bathroom himself and completing the same task.
I button up my shirt, put my panties back on and sit on the bed. “How many people have you had sex with?” I ask Alex once he steps back in my line of sight.
He freezes, his hand half-way up to his face. “You really want to know that?”
No. Yes . “Yes.”
“Why? Is that important to you? I never claimed to be a saint before I met you.”
“I know that. I just want to know. I mean, you know mine.”
Alex chuckles and sits next to me on the bed. “I suppose that’s true.” He sighs before continuing. “I used to get a lot of attention from women. In high school. In college. I mean, I still do. And for a while, it was really hard to turn down. Losing a mom and having a dad that ignores you, I was begging for some attention and I would welcome it at every turn, even if it came from random girls that just wanted to get into my pants for the prestige of it all.
“So, yeah. It’s a high number. I’m not even sure I know the exact amount but let’s just say, it’s not something I’m particularly proud of.”
Grabbing his hand, I pull it to my mouth to place a kiss on his palm. “You are an incredible man. Anyone with half a brain would see that. Those people were lucky to have had anything to do with you. And now they’re unlucky since they’ll never get their chance again.”
“Is that so?” Alex laughs, pulling me onto his lap and wrapping his arms around my waist. I murmur in the affirmative but I’m starting to lose focus from the way his body feels under mine. He’s definitely hard again, that I can tell for sure but I am surprised by how ready I am too. He’s going to make me a sex maniac after all.
Rocking back and forth a bit on his lap, I rub his arms up and down for good measure.
Alex groans, “You, my sunshine, are going to be the death of me.”
A grin. “A very, very, very good death.” And then I attack.
The smell of salt water permeates my senses as Alex and I walk along the water. After spending much of the night wrapped in each other’s arms, we decided a morning walk along the beach would be nice. Obviously we bundled up since it was almost December and more than mildly freezing outside. The beach is empty though, so that is a plus.
“How often did you come here?” I ask as Alex snuck his fingers between mine.
“Not a whole lot. Mostly before Mom was gone. Dad never took us on any vacations after that.”
I squeeze his hand in mine. I wish I could go back in time and erase all the bad memories he’s lived through. I wish I could meet that little boy and tell him that one day he’s going to turn into an incredible man and that all the worries he has right now will fade away. I wish that were true but even still, Alex was still worried about Drew before himself. I doubt that feeling would ever go away for him. I wonder if that’s what Arden feels about me.
A melody drifts by us as we continue walking down the shore. A soft, jazz like rhythm. Looking to my left, I notice it’s coming from a speaker attached to a little cafe on the boardwalk.
“I know this song.” Alex shifts and before I know it, he’s pulled me in front of him, his hands at my waist, mine on his shoulders. “My dad used to sing it to my mom while she would cook.”
Alex sways us back and forth for a few beats before he starts humming the song along with the speaker. I start to recognize it. Dream a Little Dream of Me. Resting my head on his chest, I let him move us side to side. “He’d pull her in. Just like this.”
Alex tightens his hold on me, placing his chin on the crown of my head.
We probably look ridiculous, dancing on the beach in the middle of the morning, but I couldn’t care less. There’s no place on this entire planet where I’d rather be.
Once the song ends, Alex takes a step back and smiles, taking my breath away. For real. I have to catch myself for a moment before I can fall back into step with him. There’s something about his face and this place we’re in together. Something about the way that he’s taken care of me and shown up for me even when we were merely just co-hosts on a silly little podcast. The feeling burns deep inside my gut, in my heart, and I think I know what it is. But I don’t dare say it. How could I possibly? We only just started dating. There’s no way…
“Sunshine?” He asks as he looks back and notices I’ve stalled out on the beach. “You okay?”
I nod, quickly. Too quickly. I need to process all these emotions before I go and tell him what I’m feeling. What if he doesn’t feel the same way? He’s been with plenty of girls. He’s had feelings way more advanced and more often than me. He’ll probably think I’m a fool for feeling this way about him so fast.
Alex kisses my forehead. “Out with it. I can see the wheels turning in there.” He points to my head.
“It’s nothing,” I say as reassuringly as possible. “Just thinking about the breakfast. I hope they have french toast.”
Alex laughs and drapes his arm across my shoulders. “I hope so too, baby.”