Forty-Eight
Nameless
“Fuck! He’ll kill me for this!”
Sunny’s words bounce off my brain, not heavy enough to penetrate the depths of the V-haze.
My orgasm is so close. I’m going to come on Bear’s face, the fork I embedded into his eye, the only thing I could find to fuck. I’m facing backwards so his nose rubs the front of my pussy. My hands are wrapped around his chin as I ride him hard. The fork moves inside his brain with every jerk of my hips, and his insides squelch as they squeeze up out of his socket.
The potion itself gives me a high, but the intensity of the orgasm is what I’m after. That moment where nothing else exists but the glorious feeling of pleasure, no pain.
No pain.
A rough hand grabs me on the bicep and wrenches me off the fork handle. I scream as I reach for the corpse, trying to find my way back to it. I need that release.
He grabs my other arm and shakes me. “Stop!”
“Just fuck me,”
I beg, reaching between us to pull at his clothes. I don’t need the fork if I have his cock in my hole.
“Shit. Tim! Get your fucking ass in here!”
He spins me around, trying to stop my groping hands. So I cup my own pussy. I don’t need the fork. I don’t need him. I just need the high.
As footsteps echo towards us, Sunny wraps both his arms around me, then grabs my wrists when that doesn’t stop me. He jerks my arms behind my back, and I cry out.
The newcomer stops in front of me and snickers. “Let her go. I want to see her do whatever she was doing to Bear.”
“Fuck off and get Terra.”
“You just told me to get in here,”
Sadist drawls. “Also, she specializes in diseases. She isn’t a healer.” He laughs coldly. “Eduardo’s due back with our Boss at any moment. You’re so fucked.”
Sunny’s grip tightens on my hands. “Help me with this,”
he says, “and I’ll tell you what happened to your brother.”
Even through my desperate need to get off, I can feel the tension exploding in the room. It gives me pause, a warning blare going off somewhere beneath the rubble of my soul. I still in Sunny’s grip, wondering if he’s using me as a shield.
All this time, Sadist has taken delight in hurting anyone around him. Like I’ve chased the V, he’s chased sadism, but there’s always been a selfish, indifferent air to his actions. A transfer of pain from him to his victims. That’s gone now.
It’s been replaced by a feral need that feels too much like hope. A tight voice that quivers. A tension that suffocates.
“You don’t know shit about him,”
he says. “He was gone long before you arrived.”
“I met him right before I was picked up. He was looking for you.”
“He’s still alive?”
he breathes.
“Yes.”
“If you’re lying to me –”
He cuts himself off, his voice shaking.
“You’ll kill me, I know.”
“No. No, death will be too fucking kind,”
he hisses. “Tell me where you saw him and when.”
“Help me with her –”
Sunny pivots behind me, jerking me with him, keeping me in front. I’m absolutely a shield. I push back against his hips, my hands groping for his cock. I do not fear death; I fear living.
I fear the voices in my head.
The choices I’ve made.
I can feel Sadist’s body heat right in front of me. Can feel the danger of his wrath. “Prove that you aren’t lying.”
Sunny talks low and fast. “He said you took his place in this program. And before that, you took the blows that were meant for him. You were always protecting him. He has a limp from where your dad beat him – and you gave yourself that same injury so when Antonio’s pack caught you, they thought they had him.”
“You could’ve found all this out –”
“How?”
There’s a moment of silence, Sadist vibrating with energy in front of me. I can almost feel his utter terror to believe in something that will break him if it’s false. Hope is such a terrible thing…
Tears burning my eyes, I try to get Sunny hard so I can escape this conversation, this world entirely, but he stays limp beneath my palm.
“Why have you never told me?”
Sadist finally asks.
Sunny laughs hollowly. “Because you’re a dick, and I’m an opportunist. Now help me with her because if Antonio comes back and finds out I’m the one who got her hooked on V, he’ll kill me, and you’ll never get your answers.”
He curses.
The next second, he’s down on his knees and lifting my legs over his shoulders.
“What are you doing?”
Sunny demands.
“She’s addicted. Unless you want her riding whatever she was of Bear’s, I suggest you help me calm her down.”
His lips press against me. His tongue strokes between my pussy, and I arch against his face on a cry. Sunny’s hands release my wrists, and I reach up behind me to grab a fistful of his hair with one hand, and the other, I slip into the fine strands of Sadist’s. Sunny massages my breasts from behind, playing with my nipples. His lips and tongue run across my neck, then sucks on the base, and I scream.
Sheer pleasure cascades over me, rushing through me like a broken dam. As I convulse between the two of them, they continue to kiss me in two separate places, forcing me to ride the tremors until I can’t feel anything other than this.
No pain.
No pain…
My legs drop to the ground. A hand grabs my chin, and a voice whispers in my ear, “If you want more V, you’ll agree with whatever we say. Do you understand me?”
I nod on a sigh.
Anything at all…
They toss me down onto the bed, and I laze out like a cat, burrowing my head into the pillows with a sigh. But just as I’m about to drift off into sleep, a dark cloud storms in on the horizon.
I tense, my breath catching as the air electrifies with an alpha’s presence. And he’s pissed.
My mind screams with danger.
Take shelter.
But there’s nowhere in here for me to hide.
“Antonio –”
Sunny starts, a hint of panic pitching his tone. “We didn’t know Bear was giving her V. He was the one taking care of her. We haven’t been –” he cuts himself off, and I can almost hear his swallow of nerves, my senses on high alert.
Run.
Run!
Run!
I try to struggle to my feet, but I can’t remember how to work my limbs. They feel so damn floaty, all the way up there on cloud nine.
“Check her,”
Antonio says, his voice a shock to my system. Terrible memories start to rise. “Heal her.”
“She’s coming with us.”
A little girl, too small to survive outside the womb, is held in the palm of his hand.
No!
I stumble to my feet. Arms grab me. I scream and kick, desperate to escape the nightmares shouting inside my head.
I need more V.
I need more V!
“She’s still carrying,”
Eduardo says as his hands push on my stomach, a warmth spreading inside me despite the chill of my marrow.
No! Don’t remind me something’s in there.
Get it out!
Get it out!
Get it out!
Screaming, I dig my nails into my stomach. They jerk my hands away. Antonio’s presence burns like the devil’s touch, a hot metal rod shoved straight into my heart.
“You killed her.”
I sag forward, held up only by their hands, my body shaking, my heart aching. I suck in giant gulps of air as my lungs struggle to process its arrival. I start to hyperventilate. I can’t breathe. My fractured mind shoves sharp shards of memories down my throat. Makes me choke on them. Makes me bleed.
“You killed her!”
I yell, lifting my head, feeling my rage. Grabbing hold of that instead of my grief.
His voice appears right in front of me. “Who?”
he says so casually, it’s like a slap across my face.
I lunge for him, trying to bite whatever I can reach. The men hold me tighter – until Antonio slams his head into mine, then they release me, and I stumble back a few steps. Pain explodes through my skull. Large, callous hands lock around my wrists as I start to fall. My legs are numb, my entire body feeling foreign, but he holds me steady.
Pulls me close.
“Did you even have a name for her?”
he murmurs with too much cruelty to bear.
I kick out, hitting one of his shins. Twisting me around, he shoves me forward. I stumble across the floor, then into a wall. My head aches from the sudden contact, a migraine of pain spreading down my face. He presses in close behind me, one hand pushing on the back of my head, the other twisting my right arm in pain.
My knees buckle as I sob in grief.
I call her Rafiki because it was the first name Varius offered, but we never agreed.
We never properly talked about it.
Just jokes and laughter.
We made jokes, and she died nameless.
Without ever knowing she belonged. That she was loved.
Because of him.
I struggle against him, my fury renewed, but he just waits for me to tire myself out. It doesn’t take long. I’ve been so used to being broken, feeling any other emotion is exhausting.
Collapsing against the wall, I cry myself dry.
His lips press against my left ear. Whispers so quietly, I almost miss it over my heaving sobs. “Well, I had names for mine.”