Chapter 6
Six
“ O kay kiddos, it’s time to clean up!” Abby’s class helper, Mary Beth, called out across the room. The screams of twelve three-and-four-year-old kids filled the room and Abby winced as the noise made her head pound. She was well aware of the signs of an oncoming migraine, and they were all there that afternoon. It was her own fault. A lack of sleep from another nightmare, and a grueling two-hour run before work would definitely bring it on. And she hadn’t had her usual two cups of coffee either. The caffeine would have helped.
She’d been caught in a cycle of self-loathing all day, wanting nothing more than to crawl into her bed and wallow from embarrassing herself in front of John. He’d been flirting with her, there was no doubt about that in her mind. But then she’d tried to kiss him, and he’d rejected her. Heat crawled up her neck for the millionth time that day and she pulled at the edge of her shirt. She was so sick of wearing things to cover her scar.
The fluorescent lights in her classroom turned on and Abby shivered. At the beginning of the school year, she’d been very intentional about providing alternate lighting for her classroom. There was nothing she could do about the other areas in the school, but her classroom would not be a constant reminder of that night in the hospital.
“Classroom lights off, please, Genevieve.” Abby watched the little girl flip the switch back off.
“Sorry, Ms. Abby!” she called out as she went to get her backpack from the rack.
Shoot. Her eyes had been sensitive to the light streaming in her windows since lunchtime, but that jolt of brightness made the nausea simmering in her stomach roll with a vengeance.
The day was almost over. Abby just needed to get through her parent-pickup duties and then she could drive home and lay in the darkness until the pain passed. She tried to pull her shirt away from her neck, hoping to lessen the pressure, but it was no use. As soon as she let go, the shirt constricted her once again.
Maybe it was time to stop wearing them. But Abby hated how her scar looked, and she didn’t want to scare the children she taught. They were very observant, and very curious, and had absolutely no filter, which normally she loved. But her scar was too personal. It brought up the worst thing she’d ever lived through.
No, she needed to still keep it covered. Maybe a lightweight scarf would be better. It certainly would help her stop overheating.
“Alright everyone! Line up with your backpacks by the door and once everyone is calm and quiet, we’ll head out to the playground for parent pickup.”
“Good job, kiddos! I had so much fun in class with you today! Be sure to show your moms and dads the harvest pictures we colored today. I made sure they were all in your backpacks.”
Abby gripped the edge of her desk and tried to breathe through the throbbing pain.
“Are you okay?” Mary Beth asked, worry laced in her words.
“I’m fine. Just a headache. The kids were very energetic today.”
“God, weren’t they? ALEX! GET DOWN FROM THERE!”
Abby winced and Mary Beth slapped her hand to her forehead.
“Sorry, Abby. Do you want me to take over for you so you can get some rest?”
Yes. More than anything, please. “No. It’s really not that bad. I know you have book club tonight, right?”
“Yeah. I’m hosting this week. But I can scrap my dinner plans and just order a couple of pizzas for everyone.”
“No. I’m not letting work take from your stuff. You’re already here too many hours over what you get paid for.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes. But tell me again what book you read? I need something new to dive into.”
“Oh girl. First Sight by Amber Cassidy. It was…” She lifted her fingers to her lips and pulled them away with a kiss. “Absolute perfection.”
“Sounds like I’ve found my book for this weekend.”
“You’ll have to let me know what you think. I’ve got the second book in the series on the board for the next book club pick. You should join us!”
“I’ll definitely think about it. Now, go. And I can’t wait to hear about all the gossip you get tonight.”
“Don’t schedule any meetings during lunch tomorrow and I’ll fill you in on everything!”
Mary Beth waved goodbye as Abby took the kids out to the playground. Dismissal always felt like the longest part of the day, but it was especially painful on days when she was in charge of late pick-up. The only bright side was seeing John when he got Katy. But now even that would be awkward.
And just like she thought they would be, the next forty-five minutes were hell. Abby swayed, forcing herself to lean against the only tree in the playground. The shade was providing some relief from the pain the full blast of the sun was assaulting her eyes with.
The only kiddo left on the playground was Katy. Abby looked down at her watch and cringed. John was twenty minutes late. It wasn’t unusual if something came up with his work for him to arrange one of his siblings or his parents to pick Katy up, but he always communicated that with the school. And seeing as how her principal hadn’t gotten a hold of her to talk about a change in plans, she didn’t know what the delay could be. As much as she enjoyed getting to see him, all she wanted in that moment was for someone to get Katy before her head exploded.
She waved at Katy, who was looking at a small dandelion growing under the swing set, when a truck pulled into the parking lot and stopped just a few feet from the playground entrance.
“Daddy! Daddy! Look my hair!” Katy’s smile reached her ears and Abby couldn’t help but smile at the excitement. “Ms. Abby did my princess hair!”
“I see that beautiful girl. Why don’t you go grab your backpack while I talk to Ms. Abby?”
“Otay! Bye Ms. Abby! Tank you for my hair.”
“Anytime, Katy. Be good for your dad tonight.” The throbbing behind her eyes intensified, and she prayed John didn’t want to talk too long. She needed to get home, and into bed. Things were already at a desperate level.
Abby closed her eyes for a second, trying to clear her vision. A warm hand landed on her arm, and when she opened her eyes, she saw John watching her, concern etched on his face.
“I’m sorry I was late picking Katy up today.” She tried to focus on his face, but her blurry vision was getting worse. “You okay?”
She smiled. “Of course. It was just a busy day here. So, what did you want to talk about? I hope I didn’t overstep with Katy’s hair.”
“Not at all. I was just wondering how ‘princess hair’ came about. She’s usually okay with how I do it in the morning.”
Abby sighed. “Honey had her hair done in braids today. Katy asked her about them and Honey mentioned how her mommy always braids her hair. Katy got a little upset, thinking only moms could braid. I told her anyone can do it, and she asked me to do her hair.”
John scrubbed his hand across his face. “She’s been asking me when she’s going to get a mom. It breaks my heart.”
“Kids are great at spotting the differences in things. But you are more than enough for her. The love you and your family pour into Katy, it’s beautiful to see. And one day, whether she ever has a mom in her life or not, she will thank you for loving and protecting her.” She swallowed thickly as a wave of nausea washed over her. It was hard to concentrate on John’s voice as it grew more and more distant, while her heartbeat grew louder as it throbbed in her head.
“I used to think having a newborn was the hardest thing ever.” He laughed, and she tried to smile, but the playground was spinning around her and her heart was beating so fast the pain in her head was unbearable. “Are you sure you’re okay? You look a little pale.”
“Fine. I’m fine. I'm just ready for today to be over. You and Katy have a good night.”
“I was hoping to talk about this morning.” John touched her arm, but she pulled back.
“It’s really fine, I promise. I need to get going.” Something in her expression must have let John know that she was about to run, because his hand fell away as he nodded. Abby turned and tried to make her way to her car.
A blinding jolt darkened her vision and rolled her stomach. She was almost there. All she needed to do was unlock the damn door and she could get home. Abby fumbled for her keys inside her purse, gasping as the pain multiplied and her vision went completely dark.
“Abby?” John’s voice called out from across the parking lot, but she could already feel the school fading away.
Her head swam, and a cold numbness rolled through her body. The last thing she remembered was falling towards the ground.