Chapter 15
He felt an overwhelming surge of protectiveness and love as he moved towards her.
She had never allowed him to touch her before.
And he had gotten used to it. Wrapping his arms around her, he inhaled her delicate scent, the cream she uses on her skin, the scent of her bath gel.
A shudder went through his body when she simply held on, her face pressed against his chest.
Everything they had done to each other, every painful word that had been spoken between them, just disappeared. She was ill. And she needed him. He had to be there for her. It mattered not how many times she had rejected him. Right here and now was all that counted.
As she clung to him, an unfamiliar warmth began to spread through her, slowly melting the icy barriers she had built over the years. The realization that she was not alone in this battle, that someone cared enough to stand by her when she was at her weakest, brought a flicker of hope to her heart.
They stayed like that, wrapped in each other's embrace, as the sunlight poured through the window, bathing the room in a gentle, golden glow. The silence was not oppressive, but comforting, filled with the unspoken promises and the newfound understanding between them.
When she finally lifted her head, her eyes met his, and she saw the depth of his concern and unwavering support. There were no more walls between them, no more distance created by past hurts and misunderstandings. They were united in this moment, ready to face whatever came next together.
"I'll be right here," he whispered, his voice steady and reassuring. "We'll get through this. Together."
For the first time in years, she felt a sense of peace. She knew the road ahead would be difficult, but with him by her side, she believed they could conquer anything.
Alarm shimmered through him when she simply burst into tears.
At first, he just sat there, staring at her.
He had never seen her cry before and her tears did something to him.
With a muttered oath, he scooped her into his arms and took her back to bed.
And spent several minutes just holding her, cradling her against him, his hands moving soothingly up and down her back.
She spoke and he listened.
"I told Julesa," she began. It shocked her that she did not feel an ounce of embarrassment.
The tears had cleansed her and made her feel empty and strangely peaceful.
"After I got word of the diagnosis, I called and asked to meet with her.
" Her fingers curled into the dampness of the shirt she had made with her emotional outbursts.
She never knew she had it in her. But apparently years of bottling things up had just burst through and she felt so much better.
"I told her I was ill." Her lips trembled.
"She told me how she felt, what I did to her and her family.
I am so ashamed, Harry." She whispered. "I have done so many things wrong – I haven't showed love to you, to my children.
I played with their lives. My daughters are trapped in unhappy marriages and you-" Tilting her head, she stared at him.
"You have affairs because I have turned you away.
" She sighed wearily, feeling the weight of depression cloaking her. "I don't know how to fix it."
He tilted her chin up, marveling that in this moment of vulnerability, she had never looked more beautiful. Her eyes were wet with tears, her face bare and naked. For the first time since they've been together, he saw the real Jacquline and realized that he loved her more than ever.
"It's not too late," he murmured. "And I am not accepting defeat. We're going to fight this."
She laughed bitterly. "I don't know if I have any fight left in me and I deserve this. For all the things I've done, this is what I deserve."
"Utter nonsense," his tone was brisk and bending his head, he brushed his lips over hers. When she did not jerk away, he deepened the kiss. Excitement crashed through him when she returned the kiss, her movements tentative. When he tried to move away, she clung and pressed her lips on his.
With a tortured groan, he gathered her against him and plundered her mouth.
*****
He insisted on them spending another day at the cabin.
He wanted that time with her before they had to go back to the real world.
They spent the day exploring the land, finding little pockets of delight.
Birds chirping in the trees, flowers blooming in hidden valleys, the quiet solitude.
She packed a picnic basket, and they had lunch by the stream and afterwards, he made love to her, right there on the blanket, with the feel of the spring breeze dancing over their flesh.
He whispered words of love, made promises to her that had her crying and clinging to him. There was no doubt of his devotion to her, no question of whether or not this was real. She wanted to freeze the moment, knowing that they were going back to reality.
"Ready?"
He came up behind her as she stood in the bedroom where they had explored each other with a thoroughness that left nothing hidden.
"It's so lovely here."
"We'll come back." He came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her narrow waist. It marveled him that he had the freedom to touch her like this.
Brushing back tendrils of hair from her neck, he nuzzled.
They had delayed the departure several times during the day with him making love to her in the shower and in the bedroom as he dried her off.
"Yes." But still she stood there and did not move. Placing her hands over his, she leaned her head back against his chest and closed her eyes. "I love you."
He felt the electric jolt straight through his entire being and wondered if he would ever get used to her saying that.
"Sweetheart-" He groaned, hands tightening around her waist. "If it's your intention to keep us here another hour or so, you're doing a good job of it."
An impish smile touched her lips as it occurred to her that there was power here.
The power of love, the power to make this wonderful man of hers do anything she wanted.
And it was not one sided. Turning in his arms, she allowed him to see the full force of her adoration for him.
The look of her, the message transmitting from her eyes had him going weak.
He was feeling the full force of her love, and it baffled as well as humbled him.
For a few pulsing seconds, all he could do was stand still and stare at her.
Then with a muttered oath, he crushed his lips to hers. "We can always leave later," he decided as he swept her into his arms and carried her back to bed.
*****
He wondered at the difference. Coming back here was so different.
He no longer felt the tightness and tension squeezing his heart or the discontentment that came with living here in this pile of brick and glass.
They had stopped at her aunt's place. Funny, he no longer thought of it as that.
It was now home. He had an office, done up in a purely masculine manner with soft tones of tan and quiet blues.
Furnishings had been sourced. Their offices were next to each other, he had insisted on that.
Hers was a pale shimmering green with gold undertones.
And she had gushed her approval, flinging her arms around his neck.
It was their home. They had several different residences of course. He had talked her into keeping the apartment in the city for when they wanted to get away to watch something on Broadway or go to a fancy restaurant or stroll through the galleries and museums.
They had found each other. Out of extreme adversity, they had somehow found something that was so precious, it took his breath away.
"Ready?"
Her soft voice had him turning his head to look at her.
She had gone for a simple cotton dress with yellow and white flowers sprinkled all over the cotton.
It had a nipped in waist that made her waist looked even smaller and her hair was loose, giving her an innocent look that made him think that he was robbing the cradle.
Sliding his gaze to their joined hands, he gave her a quick grin.
"I don't think they're going to evict me, darling. "
She rolled her eyes at him. He responded by snatching her up and kissing her until they were both breathless.
He kept his arm around her waist even when the doors swung open. Joani grinned at them, eyes twinkling. "I was on my way out. The family's in the blue and gold salon." Her eyes searched their faces, swinging back to Jordan's. "Good for you."
They found the entire family in the room. Jordan's hand tightened on hers as they stepped inside the elegant room.
"Thanks for coming," Jacquline said quietly, noticing the clasped hands that showcased them as a unit.
And she felt a settled sense of peace for the first time in her life.
Her husband was sitting next to her, one hand resting lightly on hers.
A faint blush stained her cheeks at the memories of what had happened between them last night.
The lovemaking had been tender and heartfelt. She was still vibrating from it.
Jordan drew his wife over to a single rose silk covered sofa and settled on the warmth of it, one hand braced at the back in an intimate gesture. His sisters were seated stiffly on a double sofa with their husbands sitting across from them. And they looked apprehensive as if bracing for the worse.
He realized he could look at them with sympathy for what they must be facing. He was happy and would have loved them to have even a tiny bit of what he had. But to his surprise, he also noticed the subtle difference between his parents and the fact that they were holding hands.
"Your mother-"
Jacquline squeezed his hand to stop him and turned to look at her children. "I called this meeting to discuss the state of my health."