Chapter 26 #2
Dane’s phone proceeded to light up with more texts and messages from people who’d seen it. My phone then trilled. It was Jade, followed by Octavia.
Alison and Bennett were next to receive calls from friends who’d seen Evan’s broadcast.
Cayla spun round. ‘What’re you going to do now, Daisy?’
I stared at her. ‘You heard him. He’s going back to London in a few hours.’
Cayla rolled her eyes. ‘Duh. Yeah. Because he thinks you don’t feel the same about him. He thinks Fox will always be in the way.’
I blushed under my backcombed, elaborate updo. ‘He didn’t tell me the truth. I can’t see past that.’
‘But it wasn’t exactly a betrayal, was it?
’ piped up Dane, sounding serious and mature.
He waggled his mobile. ‘You heard him. He’s in love with you.
’ There was a flicker of something sad in Dane’s eyes.
‘He didn’t tell us about being Fox either.
He thought he was doing this for all the right reasons. ’
My head rattled.
Grandpa examined me. ‘Daisy, I echo what Cayla just asked you. What are you going to do now? Throw away a chance of being happy because of your hurt pride?’
Josie tutted as she approached. She patted me on the arm. ‘I can’t believe you’re still standing there.’
One self-conscious hand shot up to prod my hair.
Cayla sighed with exasperation. ‘What did you tell me when I said I was giving up on my acting? You told me to believe in myself and just go for it. Trying is better than not giving it a go in the first place. Don’t live with regret, you said.’
God, she was so annoying when she was right.
‘Do you love Evan?’
Dane’s voice made me jerk my head away from Cayla to look at him standing next to me. There was an element of melancholy acceptance in his words.
What Evan just did, his standing there in front of Loch Crawe, washed over me. What he said and the flickers of emotion in the way he said it; what he’d just given up and sacrificed to tell the truth. ‘Yes,’ I managed. ‘Yes, I am in love with him.’
‘Then go!’ ordered Alison, pointing towards the door to The Ramblings. ‘Now!’
My heart galloped in my chest. I let out an odd sound – a mixture of a laugh and a sob – and started yanking out the pins in my hair. It fell down in a messy tumble of curls.
‘Thank you,’ I choked. ‘All of you.’
‘Here,’ panted Cayla, reappearing and jangling my car keys and mobile phone in her hand. ‘You’ll need these. I got them from your handbag in your room.’
I hugged Cayla, planted a kiss on Dane’s cheek and gathered up my skirts as I raced towards the imposing double doors.
‘You’re still wearing your gown!’ pointed out Mindy.
‘Don’t have time to change,’ I called back. ‘I’ve got to get to Evan!’
I hitched up the hem of my dress, clattering down the stone steps in my ankle boots and towards Marlene, my hair flying loose behind me. God, it was a relief to get those hairgrips out and untighten my poor scalp.
I yanked open the driver side door, jumped in and fired up the engine.
I tried to call Evan on his mobile, but it was switched off.
I screeched away from The Ramblings, sending pink gravel spraying into the air, and headed for the main road.
I knew I had to get to Evan; to tell him I understood now why he’d done what he did, and how circumstances can overtake your plans. I had to tell him that I knew how exhilarating it was to become someone else, too, and that it was easy to lose your own identity.
He had become Fox for all the right reasons, and now I knew that. I also knew that we had a future together. I couldn’t imagine him not being there in my plans.
Evan had thrived on Fox’s anonymity, and now that he’d given that up, his life wouldn’t be the same again. And the reason he’d done that? Me.
I concentrated through the sun-splashed windscreen and gripped the steering wheel.
On the seat beside me, my phone erupted again. Jade’s name appeared. Moments later, Octavia tried to call me, too.
I fixed my attention on the road ahead, not taking any notice of the dusty country lanes and bustling hedgerows dotted with flowers. All I could focus on was getting to Loch Crawe. Thank goodness it wasn’t far.
Evan was Fox.
Evan was in love with me.
I was in love with him.
Confessions were catching.
Leon and his tainted memories had held me back and made me cautious.
Not anymore.
Relieved to see very little traffic, I put my foot down on the accelerator.
Loch Crawe unfolded to my right like a huge, oval mirror in the sunshine.
‘Please let him still be here,’ I pleaded out loud, looking to the picnic area on the left. It was deserted.
I slowed down and looked around, but there was no sign of him. Surely he must still be here somewhere?
I parked up near the picnic area and jumped out, calling his name over and over, but there was no answer.
I yanked up the hem of my gown and darted this way and that, calling his number again. Still no reply.
I was almost hoarse by this time, weaving amongst the stately trees at the picnic area and then crunching down by the loch shore.
I couldn’t see him anywhere.
I don’t know how long I trailed around looking for him or hoping to catch a glimpse of him. The hem of my dress caught on the shingle by the loch shore. My hair clamped itself to my cheeks.
With dejected tears springing down my face, I trudged back to Marlene and sank into the driver side seat. I rested my head on top of the steering wheel.
Evan was gone.
I did love him, but he thought I didn’t.
That hurt more than anything else in the world.