Chapter Five #2
“I watched this weird alien movie with my grandma and it just scared me shitless. I didn’t sleep but for a few hours for a solid year.” I laugh at the memory. “Even now I don’t like to watch alien movies. The universe is so big…”
“Why would they want to abduct you of all people?”
I snort and pinch his side, laughing when he wiggles closer. “I’m extremely smart. They’ll want to experiment on me and dissect my brain.”
“Definitely,” Sully quickly agrees. He looks thoughtful for a moment, the creases around his eyes deepening. “I have an irrational fear of rabbits.”
“Not irrational. They have sharp teeth.”
Sully groans. “You’re not supposed to make it worse.”
I lean forward to kiss him because I need to taste his smile, taste his laugh.
Sully’s big hand presses against the small of my back, tugging me close enough that I forget where his body ends and mine begins.
Rubbing my bare foot along his calf, I tangle my fingers in the soft hair at the nape of his neck.
Time feels suspended in Sully’s arms. I wonder what would’ve happened had I found him back in Portland.
Would I have even given him a shot? Would I have let myself miss out on this perfect man that somehow sees me for me, wants me for me?
I wish distance wasn’t such a large divide.
It’s so easy to imagine a future unfurling before us as we date, discover each other, find out if we’re as good of a match as Tuscany has made us feel.
Sully’s lips slow, his body growing heavier against me.
I kiss him until his eyes stay shut, until I’ve realized he’s fallen asleep in my arms. My sweet Sully.
The temperature is too warm under the covers, so I toss them off of us.
Sully tugs me closer to him in his sleep, needing me close even in his dreams. I trail my fingers over his slight beard.
He looks good with it, and I like the way it feels against my skin as he kisses me.
Gives him a little bit of protection against beard burn from kissing me, too.
The damn scar between his eyebrows gnaws at me, bringing some emotion to the surface that I’m not sure I can name.
Maybe protectiveness, maybe anger that someone could treat little Sully with anything but tender care.
I don’t know. I can’t explain it. All I know is that Sully is safe in my arms tonight, safe in my bed, and safe in my care.
Sully is still asleep when I wake up the next morning.
I kiss his cheeks, kiss his closed eyes, kiss his nose, kiss him anywhere I can reach until his eyes are blinking open.
A sleepy smile tilts his lips up as he tugs me closer to him.
I tuck my head into his neck as we cuddle under the warm light of morning.
He smells like sleep and warmth, like everything good that he embodies.
“It’s the big day,” Sully says, voice still sleep-soft.
“It’ll be fun.”
“Yeah?”
I nod and kiss the warm skin under my lips. “We’ll make it fun.”
Sully nods. “I’ve got to get up. Best man duties call.”
“Alright.” I kiss the corner of Sully’s mouth before hopping out of the bed. “I can’t wait to see you in your suit. I know you’ll be so handsome. Most handsome man here.”
Sully lifts one eyebrow as he sits up halfway, looking like every fantasy I’ve had since I discovered fantasies as a teenage boy. “More handsome than the groom?”
I snort as I tug on my wrinkled pants. “Double more handsome than Bailey. That’s my future brother-in-law.”
Sully sighs. “Right. I’ll see you at the wedding, then?”
I nod, shoot him a grin, then open up the door to peek into the hallway. It’s clear. I sneak down the stairs toward the second floor, only to be caught by my father. He wears a grin and hands me a still steaming mug of coffee.
“Olivia was looking for you early this morning.”
“Shit,” I swear just before burning my tongue on the coffee.
Dad lays a heavy hand on my shoulder. “She figured you were up to something better and decided to leave you alone. Not an emergency. You doing okay, kid?”
I grimace slightly as I stare at the ground. “Better than I expected. I thought… thought I’d be thinking about my wedding. But I haven’t been.” I look up the stairs toward Sully’s room. “I’ve had a nice distraction.”
“Just a distraction?” Dad asks, his knowing eyes looking right through me.
“He’s younger… deserves better. Not someone as jaded as me.”
Dad laughs loudly, breaking through my momentary pity party. “You’re not jaded, Tate. You’ve been dealt a shitty hand, fell in love with the wrong person. Happens to the best of us, and it doesn’t mean that your second chance isn’t just around the corner.”
“Yeah?” I ask hopefully, wishing it was true.
“Yeah,” Dad agrees before slapping me hard on the back. He disappears down the stairs as I stare blankly into the coffee. Today is about Olivia, about her future, not mine, so I’m going to set it aside and worry about her today. Make it the best day I can.
Somehow my room still smells like Sully.
I close my eyes tight and take a deep breath, wishing I could hold on to it when I return back home to my empty townhouse, with sheets that only smell like dryer sheets.
I take an extra-long shower, feeling bad for myself, but doing my best to hype myself up.
I can do this! I can be the best big brother in the world.
Standing in front of the slightly foggy bathroom mirror, I adjust my silver tie. I don’t wear suits that often. The last time I wore one was probably for my own wedding day. But today I’m ten years older, salt and pepper slowly taking over my hair, but I’m still the same me.
I sneak down to the first floor where Olivia’s room is bustling with activity. Holding my hand over my eyes, I knock until the door opens, and I hear the soft chuckle of my stepmom.
“Silly boy.” Her warm fingers wrap around my wrist and tug me inside. “Olivia! Tate is here.”
“Tate!” Olivia screams just as I tug my hand away.
She looks gorgeous in her off-white wedding gown. A tight bodice, with flowing tulle that makes her look like the princess she’s always been. I kiss her cheek softly, not wanting to mess up her expertly done makeup.
“You look beautiful,” I tell her as tears gather in my eyes.
“Oh my god, not you too!” Olivia slaps my chest with the back of her hand. “Y’all are going to make me cry on my wedding day.”
I clear my throat and stand straighter, doing my best to yank the tears back in. “We can’t have that. Are you ready? Got your vows all memorized?”
“Yeah, Tate. I’m all set. Are you good?”
Her question puzzles me. “Yeah, Olivia, I’m great. Like always. I love you. I’m going to go see if anyone needs anything outside, help Dad, maybe. Okay?”
Before I can actually start crying and ruin her wedding, I flee the bride’s suite and head outside.
The grounds are fluttering with activity as the final touches are put on for the wedding.
Guests fill the chairs and are walking around the grounds.
So many people are here now, it's easier to get lost in the crowd, which is my favorite thing to do.
A few distant family members stop and talk to me, but I genuinely don’t care.
I keep looking around hoping to catch a glimpse of Sully.
But of course I don’t because he’s off somewhere with Bailey, doing groomsmen things.
One look at him would make my spiraling anxiety dampen just enough to get me through.
After shaking hands with some more family, I make my way up to the front to take my seat.
I close my eyes and take a deep breath of the warm breeze that blows over me.
When the music starts, I turn around to watch, but my eyes automatically seek out Sully.
It’s easy to spot him at the back, towering over everyone, even the other football players.
He’s smiling softly as he speaks with the maid of honor, her arm loosely wrapped around his.
Last night I slept with that arm wrapped around me.
Sully’s eyes catch mine and that’s when I feel it, that electricity that connects us to one another in some way I cannot explain.
Soul knowing soul. Sully grins that bashful smile of his, before focusing back on the girl on his arm to finish their journey to the altar.
I keep my head turned to wait for Olivia, because I can’t let my gaze linger on Sully, or I’ll start crying, maybe do something stupid like stand up and declare my love for him.
After days. What the hell is wrong with me?
Olivia looks gorgeous in her gown, her arm looped around our father’s.
I brush a tear from my cheek. Weddings always make me fucking cry.
I follow Olivia’s journey to the altar, smiling brightly when her gaze seeks out mine, before locking back on Bailey’s. The warmth of Sully’s gaze slides over me until I can’t help but find him behind Bailey.
Sully’s gaze is so intense, so needy, that my skin burns where it touches.
The weight of his stare threatens to undo me.
Just like at the rehearsal, we keep eye contact through the ceremony.
I should feel like a shitty big brother, but I can’t tear my gaze from Sully.
Can’t break whatever spell that’s over us.
Cheers erupt, and I shake myself to realize I missed the entire ceremony.
Olivia and Bailey are still kissing, then Bailey lifts their joined hands.
I stand and clap with everyone else so I don’t look suspicious.
Just like the previous day, the crowd slowly leaves for cocktail hour, and I wait for Sully to find me in the empty rows of chairs.
Sully holds his hand out again, giving me the strangest deja vu of my life. “Be my date?”
“How many dates are we going to have?” I ask softly as I take his hand.
Sully’s smile is soft and bright. “As many as you’ll give me.”
I’m lost. So lost.