Chapter Seven #2
His eyes brightened. “Last month, I spent two weeks fixing Mrs. Weatherby’s roof.
She kept bringing me tea and biscuits, telling me about her late husband.
And young Patrick - he’s the blacksmith’s son - he’s been following me around asking questions, so I’ve been teaching him basic carpentry.
” A smile tugged at his mouth. “There’s something satisfying about taking something broken and making it work again. ”
“You really love it,” Darragh said.
“I do. It’s simple work, but it matters. When someone’s roof leaks and you fix it, you’ve made their life better in a tangible way. They’re warmer, drier, and safer. You can see the result of your effort immediately.”
“Being king isn’t like that.” Darragh wished it were. Life would be so much easier.
“No,” Finn agreed. “From what I understand, being king means making decisions that affect thousands of people, most of whom you’ll never meet.
The results could take years to see, and half the time you can’t be sure if what you did actually helped or if things would have turned out the same anyway. ”
“That’s exactly what it’s like.” Darragh cut into a roast potato. “It’s frustrating as hell sometimes. You make what seems like the right choice, think you’ve implemented a good policy, and then three years later you’re still not sure if it worked.”
“That can’t be easy. Do you like it? Being king?”
No one had ever asked Darragh that. They asked whether he was good at it, if he was ready for the responsibility, or if he was upholding his father’s legacy. But whether he actually enjoyed the role? That question never came up.
“Yes, I think I do,” Darragh said slowly.
“I like the challenge of it. I like knowing I can make a difference, even if I don’t always see the results.
I like the trade negotiations and the policy debates.
I can even tolerate the boring council meetings, even though sometimes I have to pinch my leg to stop myself from dozing off.
But I go because it matters. It all matters to the people of Safe Harbor. ” He paused. “But it’s lonely.”
Finn frowned. “That’s hard to believe, not that I’m suggesting you’re lying to me. But you have advisers and friends. The castle is full of people, from what I could see.”
“That’s true, yes, there are lots of people here, and I do have friends.
But even with people I consider my friends, there’s still a line they won’t cross, a place where the crown gets in the way of any real connection.
Even my closest friends remember I’m the king before they remember I’m Darragh. ”
Finn tilted his head, considering. “That makes sense. I can see how that would be lonely, especially if everyone treats you like a position instead of a person.”
“Exactly.” Darragh finished his wine. “That’s why, when it comes to finding a spouse, I am very determined to be with someone who won’t bore me, who could be honest even if no one else around would be, and most of all, I hope I could have someone in my life who sees me, not just the crown.”
Finn was silent for a moment. He was toying with the last of his potato on his plate, and Darragh wondered if he’d even speak. But then he said, “And you think I might be that person.”
Darragh looked up and met his eyes. “I think you might be, yes.”
Finn nodded – just a brief move, but it was enough. Darragh sincerely hoped they were still on the same page.
The meal continued, and Darragh found himself leaning forward, gesturing with his fork as he explained trade routes. Finn was listening, but not in a simpering way as if he was just waiting for a pause to agree, but more in that he seemed keen to learn.
“So when the northern delegation says they’re ‘concerned about tariff equity,’ they actually mean…”
“They want to pay less and sell more,” Darragh finished.
“Right.” Finn grinned. “And at the World Council summit, you’ll have to sit there and pretend that’s a reasonable opening position.”
“For freaking hours. You have no idea how long some of those windbags can talk.”
“Sounds excruciating.”
“It is.” Darragh refilled both their wine glasses. “But that’s the job.”
When the servants cleared the dishes and brought dessert - a freshly baked apple tart with cream - Finn looked at his plate and laughed.
“What’s funny? Don’t you like apple?” Darragh asked. “I can message the kitchen and get something else.”
“I love apple tart.” Finn shook his head.
“I was just thinking. It was only what…ten to twelve days ago, I think it was, when I was on a roof in Winrone, covered in tar and sweat, arguing with Trent about the best way to seal a chimney. Now I’m eating apple tart in a castle, discussing international relations with the king. ”
He didn’t seem upset about it, so Darragh grinned. “Life’s strange that way.”
“It really is.” Finn took a bite of tart. “This is excellent, by the way. Mrs. Weatherby makes something similar, but I think your cooks might have her beat.”
“Don’t tell her that.”
“I wouldn’t dare. She’d stop inviting me for dinner.”
After dessert, Darragh stood. “Do you want to take a walk with me?”
Finn groaned as he rubbed his stomach. “I think that’s a good idea. Where can we go?”
Darragh understood the subtext - where could they go where they wouldn’t be interrupted by other people. “The gardens. I need fresh air after being inside all day, and I want to show you something.”
They left the dining room and walked through the castle corridors. Darragh noticed Finn looking at everything - the paintings, the architecture, the way hallways connected. When they passed a section where the stone wall showed obvious repair work, Finn stopped.
“This is new construction, isn’t it?” he said, running his hand over the stone. “Recent, too. Maybe five years old?”
Finn had a keen eye. “Six. There was a fire in this wing. We had to rebuild the entire east section.”
Finn examined the repairs more closely. “The craftsmanship is good, but they didn’t match the mortar quite right. See how the color’s slightly off? In twenty years this repair will be obvious even from a distance.”
Darragh peered at where Finn was indicating. He’d never noticed. “Can it be fixed?”
“Sure. You’d need to repaint the joints with mortar that matches the original stone color. It’s tedious work but not difficult.” Finn stepped back. “Though I suppose the king has more important things to worry about than matching mortar.”
“The king does,” Darragh agreed. “But I don’t. I care about the castle and about maintaining it properly. If something’s wrong, I want to know about it.”
“Then you should have someone check all the repairs from that fire. If they used the wrong mortar here, they probably used it throughout the entire section.”
They continued walking, and Finn kept pointing out details - all little things, but areas where fixing was needed. There were places where water damage showed in the ceiling corners, a window frame that was starting to rot, and the stone steps that had worn unevenly from centuries of use.
“You see the building differently than most people,” Darragh observed. “Most people are complimenting the décor and the tapestries.”
“I can’t help it. I see what needs fixing,” Finn said as he shrugged. “Occupational hazard. I’m always looking for ways I can help.”
They reached the gardens, and Darragh led Finn down a path away from the formal flower beds toward a wilder section where trees grew thick and paths wound through natural growth.
“This is incredible,” Finn said, looking around. “The formal gardens are beautiful, but this feels real, as if the plants are just growing the way nature intended.”
“My mother designed this section. She said she needed somewhere that felt alive, not arranged.” Darragh walked along the path, Finn beside him. “I come here when I need to think.”
“It’s very peaceful.”
They walked in comfortable silence for a while.
The sun was setting, casting long shadows through the trees.
Darragh found himself very aware of Finn’s presence beside him - the way Finn moved confidently now that they were outside despite the unfamiliar territory – and the occasional brush of their shoulders when the path narrowed.
“Can I ask you something?” Finn asked eventually.
“Of course.” Darragh wanted Finn to know about him as much as he wanted to learn what made Finn smile.
“Why did you choose me? Out of all those candidates, all those people with court experience, political training, and proper backgrounds, why choose someone who has none of that?”
Darragh stopped walking and turned to face Finn. They stood close together on the narrow path, close enough that Darragh could see the exact shade of brown in Finn’s eyes.
“Because everyone else was performing,” Darragh said softly.
“They all had rehearsed speeches and tried to guess what type of behavior would suit me, without ever asking me first. They agreed with everything I said and presented perfect versions of themselves with all the right qualifications, but there was no personality at all.
“You need to know this. It’s been less than a week, and I’ve forgotten them all - they’re a mass of faces I have no wish to get to know better.
” He held Finn’s gaze. “You walked in and told me you’d be terrible at the job, discussed my kingdom’s reputation, and spoke your mind about policy.
You were real to me. I couldn’t stop thinking about you. ”
Finn’s face looked flushed, evident even with the shadow of the tree they were standing by. “And that’s what you want? Someone real?”
“That’s what I want and need,” Darragh corrected.
“I need someone who’ll tell me when I’m wrong, who’ll challenge my thinking, who won’t just smile and nod while I make mistakes.
” He took a breath. “And I want someone who doesn’t make me look for an exit when we’re in the same room together.
I want someone I actually like, not just someone I have to tolerate. ”
His head tilting slightly, Finn smiled. “You’d better be careful, or I’ll think you might like me.”
“I know I like you.” Darragh stepped slightly closer. “The question is whether you could like me. The real me, not the crown, or the position, or the political advantages. Just me.”
Finn’s expression softened. “I already do like you. That’s the problem.”
“How can that be a problem?” Darragh was thrilled Finn liked him back.
“Because liking you makes this harder. If I didn’t like you, I could just treat this week as an interesting experience and go home without regrets.
But I do like you, which means there’s a possibility this could work, which means I might actually end up as king consort, and that part of things terrifies me. ”
“It terrifies me too,” Darragh admitted. “But less than the alternative.”
“What alternative?”
“Going back to looking for someone suitable. Someone qualified and boring who I don’t want to spend time with.” Darragh reached out and touched Finn’s arm, just a brief contact. “I don’t want to do that. I want this. I want you.”
Finn looked at where Darragh’s hand rested on his arm, then back up to meet his eyes. “I’m truly worried about what might happen if I’m terrible at it? What if I embarrass you at the World Council summit, or insult an important guest, or break some crucial protocol?”
“Then we’ll deal with it together.” Darragh dropped his hand but didn’t step back. “I’m not looking for perfection, Finn. I’m looking for a partnership. Someone who’ll work with me, not just follow along behind looking decorative.”
His eyes widening, Finn said with a chuckle, “I can definitely promise I won’t look decorative.”
Darragh laughed. “You’re already doing that better than you think. Just in a different way than other’s might have expected.”
For a long moment they stood there on the path as twilight deepened around them, close enough to touch but not quite touching. The air between them felt charged with possibility, and Darragh wanted that. He wanted Finn. There was no doubt in his mind now.
“We should head back,” Darragh said finally. “Before it gets completely dark.”
“Good idea.” But Finn didn’t move immediately, and neither did Darragh. They just looked at each other in the fading light, and Darragh thought maybe, just maybe, his completely illogical choice might turn out to be the smartest decision he’d ever made.