Chapter Thirty-Five
Bowie
Bowie had lots on his mind when he got home after his afternoon with his friends.
Isley and Lennon made it easy to act like nothing had changed, even though everything had, because they knew his secret.
He was still trying to figure out how to tell Kari about the conversation in the car, meaning it had taken a minute or two to notice Kari wasn’t home.
The worry then kicked in at finding no note to say where Kari was.
All the doubts had sent him into a tailspin of despair while he’d waited, repeatedly checking his phone, thinking about the reasons Kari was acting differently.
As the hours ticked by, Bowie had blocked his animal side, which was convinced everything was going to be fine, and had hidden under the covers, crying and desperate to pretend his world wasn’t falling apart.
See, you should have listened to me!
Bowie, staring at Kari, now acknowledged his past was encroaching on his present, and if he wanted what Kari was so willingly offering, then he had to work on accepting what Kari believed.
He was worthy of being loved by this man.
Presented with Kari’s own fears, he could see that by not trusting Kari, he’d hurt him.
That was something he had never wanted to do.
During those fearful hours, he’d gone over what Kari had talked about and how he wanted to be Bowie’s mate. Bowie wanted that, he did. Could he be daring and ask for what he wanted for himself?
Bowie reached up to stroke Kari’s cheeks, feeling the day’s beard growth, searching his gaze. “You mentioned mating with me… do you think we could do that first?”
Kari blinked, gulped noisily and said nothing.
Have I got it wrong?
I’m telling you right now to stop this nonsense and give him the time he gave you to think. Look at his eyes, he’s in shock.
His hands trembled while Bowie accepted what his animal was saying. It took effort not to slip into his old habit and hide when it was what he always did to protect himself.
When Kari pressed his forehead against Bowie’s, air hissed from between his teeth in utter relief at the love he could see. “Is this really what you want?”
Unmistakable need. Bowie couldn’t quite catch his breath. Would they do it now? He nodded, licking his lips, working on finding his voice. “Yes,” he croaked out. “Now?”
The deep chuckle came with a wide grin. “You in a rush, Babycakes?”
Yes, we are, his animal side insisted, tell him.
Kari’s earlier confession was a bucket of icy water hitting his skin and a warm blanket wrapping around him.
The two opposing feelings had his animal side easily pointing out how silly he’d been for doubting Kari.
He could see that easily now that he understood Kari’s behavior.
Would him eagerly saying yes appear to be a knee jerk reaction to Kari’s upset at him hiding, when he still wasn’t quite ready to let everyone know what Kari was to him?
“You’re overthinking.” Kari, who’d moved, tapped at the side of Bowie’s temple. “How about this, we have the entire weekend to ourselves, let me use it. Take my time and romance you the way I want to. Make this special, not something rushed. Will that work for you?”
How had the terror that had lived inside Bowie, turned to this lightness? The man currently looking at him with such adoration, such love…that was why. Pulse skipping away, Bowie released a shaky exhale. “Yes, Daddy.”
“Good.” Kari came forward and brushed their lips together. A mere touch that held a world of promise. “Have you eaten this evening?”
The very idea of food had made him feel ill earlier, and Bowie dropped his gaze, not wanting to share that.
“I’ll take that as a no.” Kari kissed the top of his head. “Let’s fix that.”
The scent of pancakes roused Bowie, and he sat up groggily, rubbing at his eyes.
The blinds were partially open, so a quick glance about the empty bedroom hinted at late morning.
He rarely slept past eight in the morning on weekends.
The upheaval of the day before was to blame in part.
Emotional outbursts always made him tired, and sleep had been difficult, when it came, with his mind going in ten different directions at how he’d ended up here, with this man.
Around two am he’d come to a realization Kari had changed something inside him.
His animal, that fateful day all those years ago, had become his biggest cheerleader, but somewhere along the way Kari had taken away the need to rely on it.
Had given Bowie the strength to be his own cheerleader.
Yes, he could slip back into old habits of believing he was at fault.
It was far easier to do when the loss of his family had been so devastating.
What he understood at two am was that losing Kari was something he’d never recover from.
The love Kari offered freely had none of the strings his family had tied around him.
It was why Kari had gotten hurt, because he’d put Bowie’s needs above his own.
It was liberating to understand he didn’t need to be anything more than himself to be enough.
Love, he needed to give that to himself before he could give it to anyone else. He could see that clearly now.
That’s all great and wonderful. I appreciate the acknowledgement. I do, but let’s focus on what is going to happen.
I’m going to be mated.
We’re going to be mated, his animal stated, loud enough to make Bowie’s ears ring.
Do you need to shout?
Sorry, I’m excited, and you’ve just said how much of a support I was. This is me being supportive.
Me too, but you’ll make me nervous if you keep going on about it.
There was a huff and a grumble, then his animal went silent.
Bowie pushed the covers off him and rolled out of bed, naked. He didn’t think about clothes when his stomach rumbled noisily at the smells Kari was creating in the kitchen.
Dressed casually in navy sweats, which did something for Kari’s ass and highlighted its pertness, and a loose powder blue T-shirt, Kari hummed along to the tune playing on low from the docked iPhone.
He was at the stove, a plate piled with pancakes resting on the counter at his elbow.
A familiar sight, yet it left Bowie swamped with feelings of love.
He must have made a sound as Kari’s head twisted to look over his shoulder, a slow smile spreading over his gorgeous face.
“There’s my sweet boy.” Kari’s gaze roamed over Bowie, and his body reacted to the heat of desire in those expressive blue eyes. “As much as I love the view, clothes are needed to stop derailing Daddy’s plans for the day.”
Bowie didn’t move. “Plans, Daddy?”
“Yep.” Kari returned his attention to the pan in front of him, flipping the pancake. “Go get dressed. I’ll tell you all about them when you come back.”
Bowie hustled off to the sounds of Kari’s chuckles.
It took him less than five minutes to wash his face and brush his teeth after throwing on jeans and a sweater, leaving his feet bare in his haste to find out what Kari wanted to do.
By the time he came back into the kitchen, Kari had set the table, with the pancakes in the center.
There was a dish of fruit all chopped up, along with syrups and pouring cream.
“Someone is an eager boy.” Kari took the empty plate in front of Bowie as he sat down and put two pancakes on it, along with a side helping of fruit.
Bowie eyed the chocolate syrup when Kari placed the food in front of him and kissed the top of his head. Another chuckle and Kari nudged it towards him. “Not too much. Remember last time you swamped them, you didn’t like it.”
Bowie had the tip of his tongue between his teeth as he carefully added the chocolate to the side of his plate.
“Good boy,” Kari murmured, taking his seat next to Bowie and plating his own breakfast.
Bowie demolished the first two pancakes, eyeing the stack with longing, then side eyeing Kari.
“Eat the fruit first, then you can have some more pancakes,” Kari said, answering his unspoken request.
A sigh slipped out as he reached for his spoon.
“Fruit is good for you.”
Bowie didn’t argue when that could result in no more pancakes. It had happened before. Kari liked him to eat a balanced meal and had explained in detail the benefits of doing this when it came with extra energy. So, he ate the fruit.
“Do you own a suit?”
Bowie blinked in confusion. “A suit?” Why would he need a suit for mating?
“Yes, a suit,” replied Kari with amusement.
Bowie didn’t wear a suit to work like Hollis.
He didn’t like how restrictive it felt to wear a suit jacket all day.
He’d only done it once and decided it wasn’t for him.
The contract requirements for work meant no jeans or T-shirts, shirts and smart slacks were perfectly acceptable. This was what Bowie chose.
“I have one, I’m not sure if it still fits. I haven’t worn it in years.”
“Then that’s first on the agenda after breakfast, we’ll be going shopping for a suit.”
Bowie’s focus shifted from his breakfast to why he’d need to shop for a suit.
Was a suit a requirement for mating? He’d never heard of such a thing, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t the case.
Frey hadn’t mentioned anything, however Bowie had not been silly enough to ask either.
Frey had, on more than one occasion, over-shared what he and Booker got up to.
“Do I need a suit for mating?” The question came out as a distraction against thoughts of Frey.
“I’ve booked a table for dinner tonight at L’Experience. Remember, Daddy wants to romance you, too.”
“Ohhh.” Bowie got all hot and bothered, fidgeting on his seat as Kari added more pancakes to his plate, ones Bowie now wasn’t sure he could eat with the level of eagerness building inside him.
He’d heard L’Experience was one of the poshest restaurants in Hazardville.
He’d never been, and from what he’d heard, it was very pricey.
We’ll be treated like princes.