chapter twenty-one
noah
I can’t hold myself back any longer—the need to be buried deep inside her overcoming me. Rising to my feet, I spin her around, pressing her against the tile wall. She gasps but doesn’t fight it. It’s a fucking beautiful sight, her bent over for me, water cascading down her back.
Wasting no time, I grip her hip with one hand while I guide myself to her entrance. She presses back into me impatiently, making me want to delay it even longer. I tease her, sliding my cock over her slick folds.
“Noah,” she whimpers, rocking her hips into me.
The last thread of my control snaps with that plea, and I push all the way into her in one thrust. Letting out a low moan, her back arches into me. I fuck her slow at first, needing to savor every moment that I’m inside her.
I grip her jaw, forcing her to look over her shoulder at me. Her eyes widen with lust as our eyes meet, and she pushes herself onto me. A growl escapes my lips as I give her exactly what she wants. Reaching my hand in front of her, I circle her clit with my fingers as I fuck her. She feels like heaven as I pump into her. I can feel her squeezing me. I know it won’t be long before she falls apart for me.
“Fuck, Noah,” she moans, meeting me thrust for thrust.
Lacing my hand into her hair, I pull up so her back is pressed to my chest.
“That’s it, princess, you take it so well,” I whisper over her ear. “Now let go for me.”
And she fucking does. A mix between a scream and a moan comes out of her mouth as she tightens around my cock, almost immediately pulling me over the edge with her. A low groan rises from my chest as I lose myself in her. Our breathing is ragged as I pull her into me, not wanting to leave her body yet.
After our shower, we’re both exhausted. Kira decides it’s best if we sleep in our own rooms in case Jared comes home. I know it’s for the best, but it takes everything I have not to scoop her up and bring her to my bed.
Now that I’ve had more time to reflect on the events of tonight, the guilt is creeping in. I’m a horrible father. I could lie to myself and say that I didn’t know Jared’s feelings, but I knew something was happening. Anyone with eyes can see that he adores her.
He confessed his love for her tonight, and I took her home and fucked her. What dad does something like that? The situation is so messed up it’s almost comical, but for some reason, no matter how hard I try, I can’t stop. I can’t get her out of my head.
I’m pried from sleep by screams coming from down the hallway, and I’m at the door in seconds when I realize it’s coming from Kira’s room. My heart sinks. She’s having another nightmare. Rushing into her room, I pull her into my arms. Her body is trembling under my fingers, tears running down her face.
“Kira, baby, it’s just a dream. I’m here,” I soothe her, brushing my fingers over her cheek.
“No, leave her alone!” she shouts, fighting against my hold.
“Shh, Kira, it’s me,” I reassure, needing her to wake up. I hate seeing her like this, the twisted pain in her face as she fights against whatever is happening inside that beautiful mind of hers. How could someone do this to her? Uncontrollable rage stirs low in my chest as I think about what she told me.
I’m going to fucking kill him.
Her eyes snap open, and her muscles tense. Fear morphs into recognition and relief as she melts into my hold. She instinctively curls into me, and I pull her closer, brushing a stray hair out of her face as she climbs into my lap.
“I’ve got you.”
I can still feel her heart pounding against my chest, and it takes everything in me not to hunt that son of a bitch down tonight.
Kira needs me right now.
“I’m sorry,” she whispers, her breathing uneven. “I—I didn’t mean to wake you up.”
Reaching down, I lightly guide her chin up to make her look at me.
“Don’t do that. Don’t apologize.”
Her features soften. A tear slides down her cheek as she nods at me. Without thinking, I grip her thighs tighter and stand, keeping her wrapped around my waist. One thing is for sure. She’s not staying here alone. Eyebrows knitting together in confusion, Kira looks up at me.
“Noah...what are you doing?” she asks, accusation in her tone.
“Taking you where you should have been all along.”
After I assure her that Jared isn’t coming home tonight for the tenth time, she relaxes. He texted me soon after we left the party. He’s staying at Jake’s for a couple of nights, and that’s probably a good thing. I’m too angry with him right now to talk to him about any of this.
He fucking left her.
I push away the anger as Kira lays her head on my bare chest. It doesn’t take long before her breathing evens out, and I pull her tighter into me, placing a kiss on her forehead.
It’s early, the sun not yet up as Kira and I stand in the kitchen. She has to leave early for the studio, so I probably won’t see her again before my shift starts at the station tonight. I’m not going to lie. I don’t love the idea of her being home alone, but there’s not much I can do about it. That’s the downside of this job, and that’s what made it hard for Angie.
“How’s he doing?” she asks, gesturing at my phone.
Jared texted me this morning to ask if Kira had made it home okay. I didn’t respond. Part of me wanted him to worry. He never should have done that to her, but this morning, the other part of me—the one that loves my son to death—won out.
Noah: She’s home, and she’s okay.
I keep it short and straightforward. I don’t want to yell at him, but I don’t know what else to say. I understand that he’s hurting. I would be, too, but that doesn’t give him the right to treat her like that.
“He’ s fine.”
She nods and takes a sip of her coffee. Her eyes are focused out the window toward the lake, the early morning light casting a blue hue on her face.
“Do you think he’s ever going to forgive me?” she asks, her voice little more than a whisper.
I step toward her, wrapping my arms around her and pulling her back to my chest. Pressing my lips to the top of her head, I hold her tighter.
“He’ll get over it. You guys are too close for him to throw it away like this,” I say, doing my best to comfort her. I know this is hard. Even though she isn’t in love with him, she loves him. He is a massive part of her life.
Her hand brushes over my arm as she leans into me.
“I just feel bad, you know? This is his house, and he’s the one staying with a friend. I shouldn’t even be here.”
“Don’t say that. This is your home now, too. He made that choice. That’s on him. Kira, look at me.”
She does, tears welling in her eyes. One slips down over the freckles dotting her cheek, and I brush it away with my thumb.
“You belong here,” I say, holding her face in my palm. Her amber eyes don’t leave mine as I add, “With me.”
Another tear falls, and this time, I lower my lips to her cheek before brushing them over her mouth. Her fingers find the back of my head as she laces them into my hair, pulling me into her. The kiss is deep, tender, and full of emotion. She’s the one who brings us back to reality, her hand sliding from my neck down my chest.
“I need to leave, or I won’t have time to get anything done before my students come in,” she tells me, gently pushing me away.
I don’t want her to go, not yet. When I don’t move, she sneaks out from under my hold, setting her coffee mug in the sink.
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” she says with a small smile.
I follow her to the door, catching her wrist as she opens it. The chilled morning air envelopes us as I press my lips to hers once more. A giggle escapes her, and the sound sends warmth spreading throughout my chest.
“Drive safe, princess.”
I watch as she pulls out of the driveway and disappears down the road. The day warms up fast as I tend to chores around the house. I check my phone several times to see if Jared has responded, but he hasn’t.
I’m hopping into my truck to head to work when I see the gas gauge hovering above empty. I was already low last night before I drove to get Kira, and after that, getting gas was the last thing on my mind. It should be enough to get me to the gas station.
Pulling into the small station, I choose the only pump left. I’m grabbing the nozzle when I hear a yelp from across the parking lot.
My senses immediately sharpen, but it only takes a second to realize it was a shout of surprise rather than fear. A blonde girl who seems to be around the same age as Kira is hoisted into what I assume is her boyfriend’s arms. A couple of their friends flank them. She’s laughing as he holds her. They’re so happy and free.
My stomach knots.
Kira and I could never do that.
“Only a couple more weeks,” the girl chirps. “Then our lives officially start.”
“I know, I can’t wait!” another girl adds.
They must’ve just graduated with Kira. I don’t recognize their faces. Then again, I wasn’t there for them.
The excitement on their faces is evident, and I can’t help but picture Kira standing there with them. It’s like the universe is showing me what Kira could have, what she should have. She should be going off to college and living her life with an age-appropriate boyfriend who can hold her in public without worrying about the consequences.
Jesus, what am I doing?
I’ve known it the whole time, but I’ve been conveniently ignoring it as of late. Kira is only nineteen. She’s so young, and has so much more to experience in life, and she can’t do those things if she’s stuck here with me. Kira and I won’t work together. We can’t. She deserves so much more than what I can offer.
I may be frustrated with Jared, but he’s still my son, and the guilt of everything is weighing on me. He’s in pain, and I don’t want him to feel like he’s alone in this.
Noah: Do you want to talk about it?
I say a quick prayer to the universe that he says no. I want to help him, but I don’t know if I could talk to him about Kira right now, at least not in good conscience.
Jared: No offense, but I would rather get rejected again than talk to my dad about this.
I breathe a sigh of relief as I send him a thumbs up and spend the rest of my shift with a sinking feeling in my gut. There’s no way this can keep happening with Kira.
I refuse to be the reason she gets stuck in this town.