9. Amorette
AMORETTE
F or two hours, we’d been sitting in Andre’s living room, going over every insignificant detail.
The one thing that Lafe wouldn’t touch was how his father got him to leave the compound on his own.
I kept shooting inconspicuous looks at him, but he ignored me, choosing to sit on the far end of the couch and pretend like I didn’t exist.
Just like when I was trapped in his apartment before, he twitched and fidgeted. When he wasn’t doing that, he was completely motionless, with a hollow look in his stormy blue eyes.
I had a pretty good idea that he was reliving what happened in the past. I wasn’t sure of the details, but I wasn’t the first woman he’d tried to save. Somehow, that made me feel insignificant and proud and heartbroken all at the same time.
He wasn’t the bad man he tried to make himself out to be. And I was wrong for how I’d treated him. I needed to fix it, but I wasn’t sure he would let me.
As the guys continued to talk, I tried to pay attention. Except the longer I sat here, the more I pulled into myself. I knew I was doing it, and there wasn’t a damn thing I could do about it.
Any time I looked down at my hands, blood stained them.
It was so shocking, so I shoved them under my thighs to hide the view.
A weird noise came from the kitchen, and the sound of metal clanking against the tile rang in my head.
Parker would let out an exasperated sigh, and all I could hear was Manuel's pained and gasping breaths.
None of this was real, but I couldn’t escape it.
Manuel didn’t have to die, but Parker refused to let him live. As if his choice to cart me into the warehouse was his own doing.
I rubbed a hand over my face. Maybe it was. During my time with the brothers, I learned there were some choices that didn’t have a better option. There were just bad and worse to choose from. Then there were the choices they could make.
That man didn’t have to capture me. He didn’t have to carry me inside. If they’d only pretended they’d never seen me, Vicente would never have known I was there until we rushed through the front doors to save Lafe.
Manuel had a name; the least I could do was use it. Did that mean Manuel deserved death? Did he deserve the wounds I gave him?
I studied my palms again. I’d scrubbed them clean in the helicopter with the wipes one of the men had passed me.
Where the brothers were stuck in their own heads and hurt feelings, this one man looked at me with pity as he handed me the container of wipes.
They were bleach, leaving a strong, stringent odor on my hands, but they helped so much.
My hands were free of blood, but I still saw it. I could still feel how the knife sliced cleanly through his flesh. His screams coated my skin, and that, I couldn’t seem to get off.
The one thing I couldn’t bring myself to do, was regret it. Maikel and Vicente had still hurt Lafe. It was nothing, the wounds they left on him were superficial, but I have to believe I saved him from worse.
And because of that, I couldn’t feel guilty about my part.
Was I broken? Would it hit me in the night?
Or would I sleep like a baby knowing I’d given Lafe some of his self-worth back? I huffed out a laugh. I thought so highly of myself.
The old Amorette would have balked and shut down. Made them take me to the birdcages they loved so much. But…I had a compulsion I couldn’t ignore to be close to them. Like I needed to make sure with my own eyes they were okay.
At some point, the conversation stopped. I glanced up, and Grey’s dark green gaze heated my skin. He’d barely spoken to me since they’d arrived at the warehouse, but I couldn’t look at him without the urge to let my gaze slide away.
It was too much. Too intense.
Andre was watching me with a mixture of concern and anticipation.
Lafe wasn’t looking at me at all.
And Parker, his black eyes sparkled. So many thoughts were happening behind that expression, but I couldn’t even begin to understand what they were.
When I didn’t say anything, they went back to their conversation. Some were pointless, some went around in circles, and some were posturing. The one thing that none of them seemed to understand was how disjointed they were.
How had they made it this far without being on the same page?
A sharp word drew my attention back from my thoughts. Andre and Parker talked over each other, the conversation ratcheting in tension. But I couldn’t focus when I caught sight of the window, it was fully night.
I’d lost…hours. The last time I glanced outside, it was evening. Six or maybe seven. The sun hadn’t started setting. Yet, it seemed like just minutes ago.
“That’s enough,” Grey interjected on a growl.
Affronted, Andre glared at Grey. “Enough? E-fucking-nough?” He scoffed. “I find out that Danny Smith is about to start hunting me, and my brother won’t tell me why he fucking left the compound in the first place!”
“It doesn’t matter.” Grey shook his head, not rising to meet Andre’s ire. “It’s ten at night. I’m tired. We’re all over your bullshit of hashing this out. Nothing is going to happen tonight. Lafe and Amorette need a break. You can pick back up where we left off tomorrow.”
Andre opened his mouth, but Parker beat him to it.
"Grey’s right. There’s nothing else we can do now.”
Taking in the tired vibe in the room, Andre got to his feet and propped his hands on his hips, then used one hand to wipe his jaw. He didn’t want to give this argument up. It bothered him that Lafe left the compound.
“I can’t believe my fucking brothers are banding together against me.
” He turned to face the wall for a few seconds then whipped back around.
The light in his eyes was almost manic. “Just tell me why you left. I need to know. Once you tell me, I’ll let it go.
Just give me the reason why you would put yourself in danger like that.
You have to know we’d come for you—and put every single one of us in danger to do it.
” Andre sounded almost reasonable now. Pleading.
Lafe brought one knee up to his chest and wrapped his arm around it. He was tucked into the corner, not quite facing me, but not facing Andre either. Then he flicked his troubled gaze my way. “Let’s talk about this later. I’ll stay after they leave. We can have this conversation alone.”
Me. This had something to do with me, and he didn’t want to say what it was.
“I was here. You knew I was here…” I muttered to myself, pressing two fingers to my lips as I thought hard about what they could have said.
Lafe turned his face toward me, and his light blue eyes gave nothing away other than how much he didn’t want to answer.
With a sigh, Parker reached forward from where he was perched on the chair and snagged the burner phone from Lafe’s pocket. They both jumped up at the same time, but Andre darted forward to catch Lafe as Parker walked to the far side of the living room while he scrolled through the phone.
It didn’t take long. Only seconds before he glanced at me, and then at Lafe. His jaw worked hard as he ground his teeth. “We have a problem.”
“What?” Andre grunted as he struggled to hold Lafe back.
“You skitstovel !” Lafe growled as he sucker-punched Andre in the gut. But it didn’t work. Andre’s arms were like bands of steel as he trapped Lafe.
Grey moved his gaze through the room, his brows pulling low like he wasn’t sure he wanted to question Parker or help Andre.
“Vicente knows about Grace. That’s how he got Lafe to go to the warehouse alone.” Parker tossed Lafe’s phone back on the couch.
Before I could register what happened, I shot up from the couch.
It was like my body realized that my sister was in danger.
“We have to go back! I didn’t see her there.
I didn’t know she was there!” What came out of my mouth was almost a whine.
I started to go…I had no idea where I was going, but I had to do something.
Grey roped his arm around my waist and pulled me down into his lap. He seemed to have been waiting for this moment, where he could capture me and pin me to him.
“She wasn’t there,” Lafe rushed out as he finally pushed Andre back. He dropped to his knees before us and placed his palms on my thighs. His warm skin grounded me more than I thought possible. I stopped struggling against Grey and studied Lafe.
He was handsome. He always had been, and I’d go so far as to say beautiful. But right then, he was wrecked. Whether from the stress of the day, or something else, I wasn’t sure.
“I got the text that he had Grace,” he said her name like he knew her, but I knew he didn’t. “I know how much she means to you, Killer. We’ve already taken so much from you, I didn’t want you to lose her too. But it was a lie.”
Tears filled my eyes and he nudged closer until his stomach touched my leg.
“She wasn’t there. They told me straight-out it was a lie to get me to come.
That I was stupid for believing it in the first place, because whenever I’ve tried to save someone, I’ve always done more harm than good.
” He sneered at Andre over his shoulder.
“Is this what you wanted to hear? I knew you wouldn’t have gone to save her.
I went since you would have stopped me to protect us.
But Amorette is part of us now, whether you like it or not. ”
“I’ve been saying that since the beginning,” Parker remarked drily.
“Shut the fuck up.” Andre pointed at Parker. “The only reason you’re standing here with us now is because I can’t fucking trust you on your own. But this is your fault.” He threw out a hand to Lafe and me. “Their pain is your damn fault, and right now, Parker, I can’t even stand to look at you.”
Andre turned away from him and after a second, Parker punched the wall, leaving a hole in the plaster before he left. He didn’t say goodbye or spare anyone else a glance.
“That was harsh,” I whispered.