25. Jordan
Chapter twenty-five
Vickasaurous Rex
Are you sure you're okay with it?
I take stock of my body, of how I'm feeling as I throw my head back on the massage chair. With everything that has been going on lately, Icarus sent me out this morning for a spa day. I've already had a massage and facial, and now I'm getting a pedicure. It's been a calm, relaxing day, and the smell they pump through the facility reminds me of my Alpha.
When he texted me to tell me Cyrus was there and he wanted to go to coffee with him, my anxiety spiked, and I knew he could feel it through the bond. I can't keep him from his packmates, though. If he wants to give them a chance, I owe it to him to allow him to do that. It doesn't mean I have to.
Or, that's what I tell myself.
Yeah, it's okay. I should probably be able to contact them in case I get sick.
I just wish this was easier, Vick. Why did it have to be them?
Because you always knew it would be.
You know your body and your mind despite the fact that so many told you you didn't.
I know. Doesn't make it any easier.
"Is that the color you want?" The blonde woman at my feet asks me while gesturing at the bright orange polish I'm gripping in my palm. It takes a moment for me to register her words.
"Oh, yeah, yeah, here." I hand her the bottle just as my phone buzzes again.
You have been added to the group chat "Pack Stargazer"
Unknown Number
Hey, Jay, it's Cyrus.
Simon
Peaches, hey
Unknown Number
Do I need to also throw a nickname out there so you know it's me, Jordy?
My stomach tightens. All three of them. In one chat. I'm not sure why I didn't expect this. Why did I think it would just be Cyrus reaching out? Of course, he's going to share everything with his packmates.
I stare at my phone for too long, unsure how to respond. After storing Cyrus and Rafe's numbers in my contacts, since I already had Simon's despite ignoring it for days, I bite the bullet.
Hey.
There we go—just the one word. With a period, so they know I'm pissed.
Cyrus
I know we're not exactly your favorite people in the world. But we just wanted to talk. Please.
So talk, Cyrus.
Simon
Could we meet in person? Stuff gets lost in translation through text.
Rafe
Plus, I haven't gotten to see you.
I'm not comfortable with that at this moment. If you want to talk, it'll have to be through text.
Simon
What about a video call?
Ah, yes, that was such a positive experience for me last time.
Cyrus
Okay, fair enough.
It's almost impossible to express how wrong we were and how sorry we are over text.
Rafe
But not entirely impossible
We fucked up Jordy
Like, big time
Simon
And we could try to explain it away, but it's not going to go away like that
so we can save that for when you're ready to talk to us
but we're worried, peaches
Cyrus
We don't want you to get sick
I'm fine.
I'm not your problem to worry about. You made sure of that.
Okay, that may have been a little too harsh, but being in a group chat with them and seeing all three of their names pop up on my screen like that makes me feel nineteen again. It makes me feel like, at any moment, they're going to toss me into the trash on the day after pickup and leave me to fester.
Rafe
We deserve that ire
And more, of course.
But can't you give us a chance?
Like you gave me a chance to present?
I fucking knew, guys. And I told you I knew. And you tossed me aside like a broken toy.
And then somehow, on the day I present, one of you finds me, and now you're trying to claim me? After ignoring me for thirteen years?
Disrespectfully, fuck you
I huff and toss my phone onto the table beside the chair. The woman working on my toes looks up at me with a smile. "Alpha trouble?"
"You could say that."
"Wanna talk about it?" Her gentle voice and clear, trustworthy eyes make me want to spill my life story to her.
So fuck it, I do.
When I finish, she clicks her tongue and shakes her head as she slides the LED light over my toes. "What a right mess those boys made."
"Right?" I say, burying my face in my hands. "And what am I supposed to do? They are my Alphas, and I could legitimately get sick. But I don't want them in my life anymore."
"Is that truth, though?" She leans back on the stool, adjusting her black wrap top. "Do you want nothing to do with them, or do you want them to have never hurt you?"
"I-" I cut myself off and take a second to think about the question she asked. But it doesn't take long. The answer is clear. "I want them never to have hurt me. I dreamt about them being my Alphas for years. It broke me when I heard they found their Omega, even if it was a lie." They haven't fully confirmed it was a lie to me, but Cyrus did to Vick, so I feel confident in my assumption now.
"And you can never go back and be unhurt. But it sounds like these guys made a damn stupid decision, and now they're trying to pretend like it never happened and step into your life." She switches the light to cure the polish on my other foot. "And you can't let them do that."
"So what do I do?"
"Make them grovel, girl." She chuckles and crosses her arms over her chest. "I read this book where these three guys told their girl an offensive, stupid lie and broke things off with her, and then when they tried to get her back, she made those morons earn her attention back. Made them beg for forgiveness."
The pedicurist removes the LED light and slips my sandals back onto my feet, giving me a conspiratorial grin. "An Alpha would look real good on his knees, no?"
The guys were surprisingly chill in their messages after my blowoff. They also didn't blow me up all evening—just one-off texts giving me insight into their lives.
I'm sitting across from Lanie at Sunday brunch when one of those texts comes in.
Simon
Hey, peaches. Are you at brunch?
Yeah, how'd you know?
You've always loved brunch.
Bloody Mary or mimosa?
Mimosa, for sure
Why not a bellini?
That wasn't the question.
But they don't have them at most places, unfortunately.
What about you?
Neither. Spiked coffee all the way
"Uh, hello, Earth to Jordan," Lanie grins. "Who are you texting?"
For some reason, I don't want her to know I'm talking to someone from Pack Stargazer. I still haven't entirely forgiven her for letting Cyrus blindside me.
But she's my best friend, so I am assuming positive intent.
"It's just Vick," I say, putting my phone back in my purse since my sundress doesn't have pockets, which is a travesty. "Just shoring up plans for after brunch."
"Wow, so eager to get away from me that you're already making plans?" she snarks. "I see how it is."
"You know it's not like that, Lanie." I look around the restaurant. It's crowded but not overwhelming, but we had to sit inside today because of the weather. It's not raining per se, but it's muggy and overcast, and there is that charge in the air that promises something gross coming. We didn't want to take the risk.
The interior is cute, with black-and-white elements that give it an upscale diner vibe. The food is also excellent.
Our server, a cute Beta with hair so blonde it's almost white, shows up with our plates. They set down a Greek omelet in front of Lanie and a slice of quiche Lorraine for me.
"Quiche?" Lanie asks, cutting into her omelet. "That's new for you. Isn't that made with like, a lot of cream?"
I blink at the offending dish and then back up at my friend. "I don't know. I just thought it sounded good."
"Mmm," she hums around her food. She doesn't say anything more, but I can't shake a weird feeling as we eat silently. My phone buzzes again. Since Lanie doesn't seem to want to talk, I don't feel bad at all when I pull my phone out.
Rafe
Did you know that hummingbirds can fly backward?
I nearly drop my phone.
What?
I cannot even begin to guess what is happening in Rafe's head right now.
Uh… no?
Why do you ask?
Hummingbirds can go backward, but I can't
So I was hoping we could go forward together.
I sputter out a laugh so unattractive that Lanie looks up from her plate with a grimace. "Sorry," I say, shaking my head. "Vick just said something funny." She doesn't say anything; she takes a big swig of her mimosa and rolls her eyes.
I don't know what her deal is this morning. I shoot off a quick response to Rafe.
That was so corny
Like, wow
But I'm at brunch with a friend. Maybe I'll call you later?
I store my phone and level Lanie with a soft look. "Is everything okay, Lanie?"
"With me? Yes." She sets her fork down over her half-finished plate. "But with you? I don't think so."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"Ugh, don't make me state the obvious, Jordan." My face must looked confused and empty because she groans. "You've changed so much since you became an Omega."
"I've always been an Omega, Lanie."
"You know what I mean!" She polishes off her mimosa before continuing. "You missed a lot of work because you went into heat, you're always distracted, and you were so unprofessional with the Alphamatic meeting."
"Well, hold on, that's unfair. You knew about Cyrus, and you let me be blindsided!"
She levels me with a scathing glare. "You're a professional, Jordan. You should be able to be professional no matter what."
I shove a bite of my quiche into my mouth so I don't say something I regret. Lanie is being a bitch right now. As my friend, I thought she'd understand everything I'm going through and the massive change I've experienced in such a short amount of time.
Instead, she's throwing it all in my face.
"I just worry about you, Jay, that's all," she says placatingly. "It seems like you're struggling to balance your old life with your new one. I would hate for it to affect people's perception of you."
"I appreciate that you're looking out for me, Lanie," I say slowly, folding my napkin and placing it over my empty plate. "But being an Omega doesn't mean I am unable to do my job. Things are a little weird for me right now, but I am the same person I always was. I am still the best in the business."
"I'm not saying you're not." She reaches across the table to grab my hand. "I just thought you should know how you're being perceived, is all."
I yank my hand back. "Perceived by who? Mr. Woods?"
She waves her hand dismissively. "Oh no, of course not. No one major. I care about you, Jords. I've got your best interests at heart."
My shoulders relax. "I know you do, Lanie. This is a weird transitory time, but I'll keep it together."
"I know you will. And I'm here to support you however you need, you know that." She pats the top of my hand softly. "And if you need to lean on me and have me do a little extra, just let me know, okay? Lean on me."
"Thanks, Lanie. You're a good friend."
We finish brunch in relative silence, and I do my best not to linger on her words. After we part ways, I pull my phone out and am surprised to see a text from Cyrus taking up the screen.
Cyrus
It's a waning crescent tonight
Something in the back of my mind tickles at the phrase, but I can't place it. I could search the term on the internet. I should search the term, and not engage the grumpy Alpha.
But I am weak.
Am I supposed to know what that is?
I kept my drinking to a minimum today so I wouldn't have to walk home in this dreary weather. Sitting behind the wheel of my car, I know I should drive home before the sky falls, but instead, I clutch my phone, watching those three dots as he types.
Otherwise known as the Omega moon.
It's been a long time since I went stargazing
It's hard not to look up and think of my Luna