Chapter 44
FORTY-FOUR
The barber pushes my head back, dragging the straight razor down my throat.
I needed this. This is better pampering than a bath bomb could ever be. They’re surprisingly close, though.
After the barber cleans me up and I pay, I head to the coffee shop next door to meet up with Will. This will be the first time I’ve seen him since bonding with Pack Lupine, and honestly, I’m nervous.
It’s one thing for him to be theoretically okay with me bonding with his brother. It’s another thing to hike up the leg of my jeans and show him the bite that’s on my ankle and hope he’s happy for us.
I sip the basil latte, which I didn’t order because it smells like Sebass, because that would be insane Omega behavior, as I wait for my best friend to arrive. Eventually, he plops down across from me with a giant iced coffee that looks like more sugar than anything else.
He raises an eyebrow at my arm, where Sebass and Charles’s marks are visible. “You’ve got yourself some new accessories, I see.”
“I did, yeah.”
“Which one is my brother’s?” His voice is a little tense, and I know this is as awkward for him as it is for me.
I prop my foot up on one of the empty chairs and show him. “This one.”
“Weird place for a bite, but please don’t tell me why or how, thanks. I don’t want to picture you with him any more than I already have.”
I drop my leg with a chuckle. “Understood.”
An uncomfortable silence stretches between us. Eventually, Will sighs heavily and reaches across the table, placing his hand over mine. “I’ll get used to it eventually, Atlas. It’s not like either of you asked for this. It’s going to be weird sharing you with him. Do you… love him?”
None of my feelings for any of the guys have progressed to love yet, but that’s okay. I am sure they can and will someday. I know I love Athena, and that she loves me, even if she hasn’t said it yet.
My pack’s bonds twirl lazily together in my chest. All of them are happy and content right now, which fills me with a beautiful calm that I’ve always craved but never thought I would find.
“I could, one day, I think.”
Will pushes some of his long hair behind his ear before taking a noisy sip of his iced coffee. “So it’s romantic, at least?”
I buy myself time before answering by taking a sip of my coffee. “Yeah. Not with Charles, though. He feels like my brother. But the others, yeah. I don’t know how long it’ll take, or what the path will look like for us, but I can see myself loving them.”
He slouches a little in his chair before smiling. “Good.”
“Good?”
“Wyatt deserves to be loved. You do too, of course, but I had to make sure that you would take care of my brother.” He sucks down another large sip of his drink, nearly draining it. “I’m jealous, dude.”
“You’re looking for a pack?” That’s news to me. Last I heard, he was avoiding any functions where packs were looking for Omegas.
“I didn’t think I was, but if you, of all people, can be a pack’s Omega, I think I could too.
” I throw a balled-up napkin at him, which he dodges with a laugh.
“I don’t mean it as an insult! You’re obviously not a typical Omega, and I’m not either.
I thought the shit I went through would make a pack reject me. That I’d be too much work.”
I reach out and grab his hand. “Anyone who thinks you’re too much work doesn’t deserve you.”
“I know. I didn’t think there was someone out there for me, but if you and Athena, after going through so much, could find your pack, why can’t I?”
“Got your eye on anyone?”
He shakes his head. “Nah, not yet.”
“Well, when you do, I’ll have to make sure they’re good enough for you. Scare ‘em a little.”
My best friend rolls his eyes, but doesn’t deny me the opportunity.
I may be an Omega now, but I will still kick the ass of anyone who hurts the people I love.
The doorbell rings, and Athena jumps to her feet. Icarus and Jordan Knight are waiting on the doorstep, the Omega holding a bottle of wine.
“Icky!” Athena says, throwing herself into his arms. She’s in a good mood today. I bet it’s because we’re getting closer to the sting to get Tyler and putting all of this behind us.
He kisses her on the cheek, and Jordan pulls me in for a hug. “Hey, Atlas. Congrats on the bonds.”
My face heats. “Thanks, Jordan. Good to see you again.”
We head to the dining room, where Charles is putting a salad bowl in the middle of the table while Sebass puts out plates and silverware. “Hey, Knights,” Sebass says, giving a small wave.
“Dinner’s ready,” Charles says, putting a large pan of lasagna on the table. “Can you get Harvey?” he asks me.
“Yeah, ‘course.” I find Harvey in the garage with Wyatt, the two of them drinking beers as they stare at a bike Harvey has in pieces.
“Atlas!” Wyatt exclaims when he notices me, moving in front of the bike. “What’s up?”
I look curiously between the two shifty Alphas, but let it go. “Dinner is ready. Icarus and Jordan are here.”
“Right, right, okay.” Wyatt tosses a rag on the workbench after shooting Harvey a weird look out of the corner of his eye, and they both follow me back inside.
In the dining room, Athena sits sandwiched between Sebass and Charles, with her brother and his Omega directly across from her. Charles is an incredible cook, and dinner is fun and light as we chat about everything.
It’s weird to think that my family has grown so much. Icarus’s pack is now part of my extended family. I’m going to have to make the effort to meet them and apologize to the one I snapped at when we were first rescued.
Shit, there are six of us. My family isn’t in my life, but I think everyone else’s is.
That’s a lot of Christmas presents to buy.
After dinner, Charles sets us up with tea, coffee, and a pound cake. Icarus takes one sip of his tea before setting the mug on the tabletop with a heavy sigh.
“I got your second round blood results back,” he says, cutting off all other conversation.
Two days ago, after Icarus provided us with paperwork for being late in presenting Omegas, we had to go to his office at the Design Clinic to get blood taken.
It was awful.
I don’t know if getting blood taken or being hooked up to IVs is ever going to do anything other than cause panic attacks in both of us.
Luckily, we had our pack there to support us, but if I never have to get blood work done again, it’ll be too soon.
Icarus was mortified that his old lab assistant was the one who had done this to us, but he turned over all the projects Joshua had worked on, along with his employment file, to Clicks and Sebass.
The more information we have about both him and McIntosh, the better.
I figured Dr. Knight would be a stickler for the rule of law, but he also set up a backdoor for Sebastian and his friend Blaine to access the Design Center’s servers and pull as much information as they could on McIntosh.
If the Hawks and Clicks are going to make those two disappear, they need everything they can find on them.
“Okay, so?” Athena says, leaning on her elbows. “What’s wrong, Icky?”
He looks at his Omega, who squeezes his shoulder. It immediately puts me on edge, and I feel my packmates’ tension through our bonds.
Whatever he has to tell us, it isn’t good.
“So, your hormone levels are back to normal now that you’ve had your heat.
I’m unsure if your heats will fall into a regular rhythm, but I imagine they will all be as mild as this one was, relatively speaking.
As mild as a heat can be, anyway. Which is interesting, because there is not much research done on the severity of heats and what causes some Omegas to be completely lost to their hindbrain and others to stay vaguely lucid, as you two did. ”
Jordan smiles at her Alpha as if he is the most interesting person in the world, as Athena makes an expression only a long-suffering younger sibling can. “Icky.”
“Right, sorry.” He closes his eyes, and it hits me that, at least this time, his rambling was a way of delaying the inevitable of this conversation. I’m on my feet and standing behind Athena, my hands on her shoulders, before he opens his mouth again.
“Your blood results show that the experimentation has rendered you both infertile.”
Every bond in my chest goes silent.
There are no emotions from anyone, and I realize we must all be blocking our feelings as best as we can.
“Are… are you sure?” Athena asks in a small voice.
“Quite. I’m sorry, Athena. Your pituitary gland produces luteinizing hormone.
In females, it triggers ovulation, and in males, it helps with sperm production.
I can’t pinpoint exactly which genetic component is responsible, but one of the Omega genes has removed both of your ability to produce luteinizing hormone.
” He looks at both of us, eyes shiny and genuine sympathy on his face.
“I know this isn’t what you wanted to hear. ”
I don’t know how to feel about the information he just gave us.
I never gave much thought to having kids. At least, not yet. When he told me I couldn’t get pregnant, that was fine and made sense.
But this is different.
I don’t care that I can’t produce sperm. There are five of us; my swimmers aren’t important.
Athena can’t get pregnant.
Pregnancy isn’t the only way to have kids, of course. It isn’t the only way to make a family.
“Are her eggs okay?” Charles asks. “Could we do artificial insemination at the Design Clinic?”
Icarus winces, clearly prepared for this question but not looking forward to answering it.
“I’m sorry, no. Because of her stage in her cycle when I took the blood, I was able to run tests for anti-Müllerian hormones, follicle-stimulating hormones, and estradiol. These three help us determine a person’s ovarian reserve. The results were not favorable.”
“I have to go.” Athena pushes back from the table and leaves the room, her movements stiff and deliberate. Icarus watches her leave before turning his attention back to us.
“Go. Be with her. Call me if you have any additional questions.”
We don’t wait. The five of us follow the path our Omega took to the nest.