Chapter 2
two
Xenia
Serena glances back at me in the rear-view mirror for the hundredth time. “Are you sure this is what you want? After you ride out your heat, I can take you somewhere away from his family. We can keep you safe. You never have to hurt again.”
I’m lying on my side in the back seat of the car.
My cramps have subsided, but I know that my heat is approaching.
It’s in the clamminess of my palms, the desire that churns forcefully in my gut, my emotions that split and fray, a swarm of wasps attempting to escape.
Trying to form a cohesive thought, I swallow down the sand that has filled my throat.
Inside my pocket, my phone begins to ring. It isn’t the first time, and I know exactly who is calling.
“He’s going to track this,” I choke out, digging into my pants. Finding the heat-blockers first, I throw them into my bag.
I might need these…after.
Serena growls in the front seat, her hazelnut scent turning harsh, nearly burning my nostrils as she weaves in and out of traffic.
Sitting up, I roll down the window. The fresh air is a necessary reprieve from the alpha who is also my best friend.
“I’m sorry, I can’t help it. You have been my best friend since I met you in that facility.
The thought of everything you have gone through.
That Vinny is trying to push your boundaries.
You were his brother’s mate for fuck’s sake, he should know better.
” Her tone is surprisingly soothing as she clips the words out, but there is also an off-putting undertone to her words.
As if there is more to them than she is saying.
Pushing that aside, I recall the facility.
The one my foster family threw me into when my designation made itself known at the ripe age of eighteen. The one Serena volunteered at. Where she was the only friend I ever made until Tony took me from it.
Digging back into my pocket, I find the phone. It’s ringing again. With only one last minor hesitation, I answer, “Vinny.”
“Xenia, where is Serena taking you? I came to your apartment, and you were gone.”
Ice forms along my spine. There’s only one way he would know I am with Serena. “So you have been watching me.” The words come out before I can swallow them down.
“Of course I have. You are a Rossi. It is my duty.”
I want more than anything to laugh, to berate him. But Vinny Rossi is not a man to cross. It is better if I play innocent. Dumb.
“Of course,” I murmur. “I am staying with Serena’s family this week. I needed to get out of my apartment.”
He is silent for so long that my heart begins to beat faster with anxiety.
The pitter patter is loud; it drowns out everything. “I miss Tony. I just, I have to heal if I’m ever going to get past this.”
The words have the desired effect. “Of course.”
Creeeaakuh!
My hold on the phone tightens. The creak in the background is distinctive.
I recognize it.
It’s from inside my apartment. Just in front of the fridge, there is a spot the landlord never got around to fixing.
My breathing picks up and I know with certainty that I have to get off of this call. I can’t keep pretending this is normal. That Vinny’s obsession doesn’t exist.
How much longer do I have until he forces his bite on me? His knot into me?
Serena must recognize my panic because she leans back and plucks the phone from my hands. Somehow, in the process, she manages not to swerve the car at all. “Hey Vinny, this is Serena.”
I can’t hear what he says, but a low growl leaves her chest.
“Do not make me bring our past or my father into this. After everything, she deserves to choose. She’s going to stay with me as long as she wants.
If that’s a weekend, a week, or a month.
You will not show up. And you will keep your mouth shut.
” She doesn’t wait for an answer, choosing to end the call instead.
Their past? Confusion hits my temple.
Her father? But then I guess it makes sense.
Serena’s father is the head of the Omega’s Rights Advocacy. He’s why First Chapter Clinic and those like it exist. Maybe she is threatening him. The ORA is the reason heat clinics are accessible and affordable. It is what prevents Vinny from taking me as his omega.
Well at least he can’t take me legally. But what’s to stop him? Does he even care about legalities?
I don’t know the full extent of the Rossi family but I know that Tony did all he could to stay clear of it.
And I know that the Rossis and the Stellars were the families in this town to avoid.
Their bitter rivalry stemming from an encounter between the two families that left one dead and the other catatonic.
But I didn’t know much more than that.
Due to Tony’s dislike of the Rossis, I had only really met Vinny and that was after Tony died.
My grief floods me. The dam bursting as thoughts of Tony circulate. My impending heat had distracted me, but now with the pain gone, I am forced to remember why I am heading to a clinic.
My alpha is dead.
“I’m turning your phone off and I’ll keep it with me after I take you to the clinic. It will be safer that way,” Serena cuts through my spiraling. “We’re almost there. You’re going to make it through this and then you take the time you need to truly heal and decide what you want.”
I don’t respond, I can’t. Her words come from a place of concern, and I don’t want to hurt her. She is already doing so much for me.
The car is silent, save for my open window. The fresh air is keeping my head clear, but I know it won’t be much longer until another wave hits. Until I am begging for my alpha’s knot.
My alpha who won’t come. He can’t.
As if she is a mind reader, Serena once more cuts through my intrusive thoughts. “Tony loved you. He wouldn’t want you to live the rest of your life alone. He wouldn’t want you to suffer on his behalf.” Her tone is void, but her words are intentional.
“We made vows. I promised him.” My voice is weaker than I intend and I bring my knees up under my chin, wrapping my arms around them. My attention goes to my bag next to me, I want more than anything to pull out his shirt, to wrap myself in his scent. But I don’t.
It would be my undoing.
“You owe him nothing! He was ostensibly kind! And if for whatever reason you think you do, the vows were until death do you part. He has parted, Xenia. You don’t have to move on, but you have to take care of yourself.
And the first step is getting out of this town.
Away from Vinny. He’s not a good guy.” Her eyes meet mine in the window.
They confirm what I already know. She is aware of just how bad he is.
“But you can’t do that until after your heat.” I don’t think she means to but her words are edged on the cusp of a bark.
The car slows and she pulls around the back of a building I recognize.
First Chapter Clinic.
It is the only one in our town that specializes in omegas’ wishes. In allowing them to ride out their heat in peace without the threat of attachments.
My anxiety hits two-fold, but it is outmatched by another flash of warmth shooting out across my body. I perfume into the car, filling up the space, and Serena chokes, slamming the car into park and jumping from it.
I watch through the open window as she marches quickly inside.
My gaze turns upwards, towards the setting sun.
There are a million places I would rather be than here.
But unfortunately, I don’t have much of a choice.
Pushing off my heat for nearly a year wasn’t safe or recommended, but I did it anyway.
I knew that it would return. Knew that I wouldn’t be able to use toys to ride it out.
Knew that the pain, the betrayal, and agony would be nearly impossible to overcome. But I’m going to do it.
I have to. Even if it breaks my heart in the process.
My hand goes up to the mark on my neck and I trace over it as I harden my shoulders. My resolve solidifies.
I’m going to ride out my heat with an unknown alpha and then I am going to leave, once and for all.
I’m sorry, Tony.