Chapter 185
Christmas
Kalen
Hey, Hey, Hey!!! It’s me, your favourite Knox brother, the one and only Monster Dick, Kalen! (Wait, does that read right?!)
Christmas is here, which means it’s my time to shine brighter than the star on top of the tree – or at least, it would be, if Onyx hadn’t banned me from decorating this year after last year’s “incident.” (I still think glitter is festive, not hazardous.)
Yesterday morning started off with a bang – literally – when I set off the surprise confetti cannons in the training zone.
I thought Amelie would appreciate the snowstorm of paper stars cascading down, but judging by her death glare, I may have miscalculated.
Onyx muttered something about me not surviving until Boxing Day, but hey, what’s Christmas without a little risk?
I’ve spent weeks planning the festive celebrations, and I’m proud to report that I’ve outdone myself.
There’s a gingerbread house-building competition in the mess hall (I rigged mine with candy cane turrets and marshmallow battlements), a secret Santa gift exchange (Sawyer’s getting socks again because he’s no fun), and the pièce de resistance – a life-size snow globe filled with fake snow that I convinced Baxter to climb into for “photo ops.”
(He called me unhinged, but Amelie laughed when I locked him inside it for twenty minutes and turned on the fan, so I call that a win.)
Of course, the highlight of the day will be the annual Knox family Christmas dinner tomorrow.
I managed to sneak some mistletoe over Amelie’s chair, because what’s more romantic than a mandatory kiss under a sprig of plastic leaves?
Onyx might grumble, but I’m all about spreading the love – and if it embarrasses my brothers in the process, even better.
And because it’s me, I’ve got a special surprise planned for after dinner: a Christmas karaoke showdown.
Slate already claimed “All I Want for Christmas Is You,” but I’m betting he’ll chicken out halfway through.
Don’t worry, though – I’ve got a backup performance ready that’ll blow everyone’s elf-themed socks off.
To everyone celebrating, Merry Christmas! And to everyone not celebrating, Merry Kalen Day – you’re welcome. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to find my Santa suit before Onyx hides it again.
Let the chaos commence!