Chapter 14
Xiah
“Are we going to talk about that?” My mother startled me.
When I called Kove, I snuck out of the kitchen to my bedroom, assuming she was occupied with the grilled corn orzo salad with dill dressing she was currently preparing in my kitchen.
My father was having poker night at the house and she didn’t want to hang around.
She also wanted to object to his night with the guys but he pressed that he had been a dutiful husband by engaging in all the things she signed him up for to keep him out of the house so she could have her alone time.
She had no argument, so for poker night, I opened my apartment for her to hang out.
Handing over my place meant a bonus meal would be stashed away in my refrigerator waiting for me to enjoy.
My mother also got to avoid cigars, liquor, and guy talk.
After ordering them greasy, fattening foods, she set everything up then drove straight to me. Now I was stuck having to decide if I wanted to give her intel on the call she overheard.
“Don’t you have corn to grill?” I locked my phone and tossed it on the bed, heading to the bathroom.
I had my braids removed earlier in the day and was sporting my natural hair which had grown at least six inches after a year of protective styles.
The silk press looked cute and the layered, loose waves she styled for me had me feeling myself.
“Xiah Mo’rae Darden…” The look she paired with the deliverance of my full government name and the use of my maiden name instead of Perry brought a smile to my face.
“What would you like to know?”
“Whatever you want to share. I don’t want to impose.” She walked right in my room, sat on the footstool at the foot of my bed, crossed one leg over the other, and leaned back, settling in for a conversation.
I circled my finger in her direction. “This feels very much like an imposition.”
She shrugged nonchalantly. “It is, now tell me about this man who wants you to strip for him.”
My mouth dropped open and I grinned, rolling my eyes.
She had listened to my entire call. She and I were truly best friends and I told her pretty much everything.
My mother had a lot of insider information about my life, not as much as Koa, but not because I didn’t feel like I could tell her those things.
I simply believed some stuff needed to remain in the friend vault.
“The man I sold the million dollar house to.” I sighed, taking a seat next to her and turning my face toward hers.
“The basketball player?” She frowned slightly and I nodded.
“Please don’t judge. I know what it looks like and…”
Her hand dropped to where mine were clasped in my lap and she covered them to stop me. “Sweetheart, I would never judge you.”
“The look you just gave me felt undeniably judgy,” I admitted and she sighed.
“That wasn’t from judgment. It was more of a reservation about who this man is. You mentioned he just signed a contract with the Royals. That’s a huge commitment and I’m sure he’s going to invest a lot of time getting settled into that role which means…”
“We’re not dating…” I blurted and she offered an amused look which had me doubling down. “We’re not.”
“You’re my child, Xiah. I know your smiles, your frowns, your tones, your postures. All the simple things that speak to me when you don’t. I can read you just from your eyes.”
“Okay, so…”
Before she said what was on her mind, I knew I was being stubborn. I was trying hard not to verbalize what I was feeling because that meant admitting something I didn’t believe possible or wasn’t confident about.
“Even if you’re not dating this man, you want to. That concerns me for a lot of reasons. Is this thing one sided? Has he expressed that he’s not interested in anything more than the two of you stripping for each other and you’re hanging on to hope that you can change his mind…”
“No…” I shook my head. “It’s not that.”
“Then what is it?”
“I haven’t talked to him about how I feel or what I want. I’m just kinda goin’ with the flow. I like the flow.” I shrugged and she grinned.
“I’ve seen the man you’re flowing with. There’s a lot to like.”
“Mom…” I warned and she laughed.
“He’s handsome, Xiah. You don’t expect me to not acknowledge that, do you?”
“I don’t expect you to do anything when it comes to him. Did you look him up?”
“No, your father did. He’s really excited about this young man being added to the Royals roster.
Apparently he’s really talented and good friends with another player your father likes on the Royals.
Tyriq Hill. The two of them played together at CFU.
I don’t know his name but your father does and you know how that man is about his sports. ” She rolled her eyes.
I grinned. My mother and I were the same.
We didn’t hate sports but didn’t seek them out.
I had no clue how she’d married a man who was obsessed with them but they worked.
I really thought my life would mirror theirs when I married Kaden so maybe part of our failed marriage was on me too. I saw what I wanted to see.
Nope, not doing that. I refuse to blame myself. He’s still an evil narcissistic asshole.
“Does he know about your debacle of a marriage? Is that why you haven’t discussed what you’re doing and just going with the flow?”
“He doesn’t know but that doesn’t have anything to do with it.
I messed that up. I believed he was something he wasn’t and I don’t want to do that again.
I’m just enjoying this for what it is and I’m also still married.
So I don’t have the right to have relationship conversations.
No future plans and no commitments until I figure all this out. ”
“With how things played out, I assumed we’d end up here.
I’ve been prepared to have this talk, so here it goes.
” She turned to me. “Your marriage, although legal, isn’t real.
You didn’t fail, he failed you. I hate that we didn’t see it but life happens.
You can move on with your life. You don’t have to penalize yourself and not entertain the potential for happiness because of that man.
You have it figured out, Xiah. He wronged you and you’re ready for the next chapter in your life.
If it’s this man, then I support whatever is next.
Now your father…” she smiled smugly, “Good luck with this one getting his approval and a chance at your heart.”
I groaned, already knowing. “I know.”
“But that’s only because we witnessed how your heart was crushed and your dreams were shattered.
Your father loves you, Xiah, and he feels like he failed you because of how things with Kaden worked out.
He can’t carry the blame any more than you can.
All of that belongs with the person who wronged you but I’m very aware that you both feel responsible. Don’t. Okay?”
“Okay.”
“I mean it.”
I huffed. “I know.”
“But please tell this young man. He deserves to know what he’s dealing with. Have the conversation with him. If he wants more than stripping, he needs to have all the insight on the woman he’s falling for.”
“He’s not falling for me.”
“He is, sweetheart.” She smiled smugly.
“You don’t know that. You’ve never even met him.”
“I don’t have to. I know the woman he’s falling for. I raised her and there’s no way in hell he doesn’t know that you’re the best decision he will ever make in his life.”
I rolled my eyes. “I’m pretty sure that multi-million dollar contract is the best decision he’s ever made in his life.”
“Honey, he can make all the money in the world and still not feel whole. He can be broke and homeless and feel like he has the world in the palm of his hand. You know what the key to both is?”
“Having or not having the love of a woman…”
I’d heard my mother say this too many times.
“Exactly. If he has the right one in his corner, he’s king of the world, no matter what his finances are.” She leaned toward me and kissed my cheek. “He’s picking you up tonight?”
Oh God no, she absolutely cannot meet him…
“He is but I don’t want to make this weird.”
“Fine, I’ll stay in your room when he gets here but you have to promise we get to meet him sooner rather than later.”
“I don’t think we’re going to be a ‘meet the parents’ kind of thing.”
“Mhm.” She lifted and headed to the door. “I’m going to make this pasta and drink some of your wine. The good one from Divine Vines as a thank you for my advice.”
“You were going to drink it anyway,” I yelled after her.
“I was but now I feel justified.”
My mother was right. I needed to have the conversation with Kove about my husband, and if he decided to end things, I would have to accept his decision.
I would be devastated but there wasn’t much I could do about it.
I had a few hours before I needed to start getting ready, so for now, I decided to join my mother while she enjoyed the use of my kitchen and my wine.
After I eased the diamond studs into my ears, I raked my fingers through my hair and smiled at my reflection in the mirror.
Okay Xi, do your thing, girl…
I turned from side to side, admiring how good I looked.
The black silk and tulle dress looked good against my skin which was glowing and shimmering from the sparkle body butter I used after I showered.
The dress had sheer, long sleeves, a low cut V in the front, sexy but tasteful, and a ruffled tulle skirt that was short in the front and layered to be longer in the back.
Simple black heels were on my feet that buckled at the ankle.
I wore the diamond pendant that matched my earrings and a set of stacked gold rings on my index finger, electing to skip bracelets and a watch.
Simple, cute, and still making a statement.
I reached for my phone and snapped a few pictures of myself in the mirror then made a short video that I planned on uploading on my story.
Before I could, Koa was on my line with a video call.
I noticed she was in her car as soon as I swiped my screen to accept. She pouted, looking frantic.
“Friend, I’m sorry. I’m leaving now and should be there in like forty minutes. Is it too late? What time is he coming?”
“Aren’t you driving? Stop looking at the phone, Koa.”
“I can look at the camera. I’m currently in traffic and my forty minutes just turned to fifty-five. Please tell me you’re not leaving like right now.”
“Not right now but in like fifteen minutes. Stop stressing. I survived getting ready without you.”
She was pouting again. “Bitch, that doesn’t make me feel better. I was supposed to be there. This date is important.”
“Not a date and it’s not a big deal. It’s a plus one to a business thing.”
“Girl, if you don’t stop trying to speak that lie into existence.
This is an ‘I’m addicted to your pussy and want you to see what life looks like being my permanent plus one so I can keep digging in them guts’ kinda date.
That man knows what he’s doing. If it was just business, he would have let them folks he pays to manage his life set him up with someone.
He wants you there, he wants to show you off and he wants you to be a part of his world, Xi. Now let me see.”
“I’m going to ignore all that, because yeah, let me just show you my final look.”
“What the fuck ever. Denial is a real thing, booski, but denial doesn’t change facts.”
I rolled my eyes and walked to my dresser, attaching my phone to the tripod selfie stick I kept for times like these. Once my phone attached to the magnet, I stepped back so Koa could see the full look.
“Hoe, you’re getting smacked up, flipped, and rubbed the fuck down tonight. You look so damn good, Xi. I approve, friend. I told you that dress was the one. I’m glad you listened.”
I grinned. “Actually, he picked. I showed him both and he chose this one.”
“Hoe, I picked first, and again, you’re proving my point. He chose the dress that has you looking like a whole entrée for what, some business thing? Girl…” she paused and began to sing Silk, “Let me freak you…you, you, you, youuuuu. All of you.”
“Koa, stop.”
“Alright, I’ll let you live in denial. I’m so damn pissed that I couldn’t be there.”
“What happened?”
She rolled her eyes. “Mediation ran late. They literally argued over who paid for the damn harness for the dog to decide which one of them gets to keep it. I wanted to chop both of their asses in the throat. Shit was annoying as fuck.”
“Dog leashes?”
“Dog leashes, friend. That’s how goofy these mediations can be.”
“So that’s what I have to look forward to?” My brows pinched as I thought about how things would play out when I finally tracked Kaden down.
“First of all, no the fuck you don’t. When we find that bitch made nigga, he’s signing over whatever you ask for with no argument, and secondly, we’re not ruining your night with talk about his stupid ass.
You’re about to flex while looking fly on the arm of a sexy man who wants to show you off to his business associates then knock them walls down as a thank you for being his plus one.
Stay on task, boo. We’re not discussing pussy ass men tonight. ”
“I love you, friend.”
“Yes you do and I love you too. You sure you can’t wait for me to get there? Stall.”
“I can’t do that but I promise I’ll make it up to you.”
“Fine, love you, have fun, take lots of pictures hugged up with your new man and post them all over your page, and before you say you can’t do that, your ex-husband has his ugly ass baby mama and that big headed child they share on his page.
He fired the first shot, but with a baby ass twenty-two, we’re coming with a Draco and emptying clips. ”
I laughed because Koa was so damn extra. “Okay, okay, I’m pulling out the big guns tonight.”
“Yes, friend, you are. Now let me go before I have to represent myself in a road rage case because these people are driving like they don’t have any damn sense.”
“Koa, play nice.”
“I am.” She smiled sweetly and I shook my head.
“Bye, friend. Call if you need bail money.” I said knowing that was a possibility because Koa seriously had issues with road rage.
She blew me a kiss and ended the video call. I grabbed my clutch and headed to the living room to wait after checking the time, realizing it was six fifty-four. Kove would be here soon and I planned on enjoying him and my night with no remorse or regrets.