3. Rowan
3
ROWAN
B eing near him seems to calm me.
I don’t know why that surprises me, but it does.
He is the father of my baby, after all.
In the elevator, I let him hold me, let myself get swept up in the idea that we might be more than just an employee and his boss.
Fantasies.
Dreams I can’t have.
It wouldn’t be right.
Pushing them aside, I say nothing as we make our way to the appointment.
Deciding to stay with Zion as my doctor had been an easy choice, I trusted him to keep me safe and deliver my baby—just like he had with Bell’s little one.
Since he was also friends with Bell and their friend Shiloh, I’d gotten to know him a little better outside of his clinic.
Did I enjoy the trek across town for my scans and check-up?
No, but at least the clinic was nice, relaxing almost, with its pastel hues and comfortable furniture.
Sitting in the waiting room, I try not to soften as I see Gideon picking up leaflets and reading them intently before sliding them into his pocket for later.
I suppose they’ll come in handy when he has his own family one day.
Mine.
A wave of nausea washes over me.
This was his family.
I was keeping it away from him.
I try to tell myself I’m doing the right thing, that this is what’s best for everyone involved, but as he strikes up a conversation with a younger expectant omega woman over feeding schedules, my chest aches.
Finally, we’re shown in by a smiling nurse who directs me to lie on the bed and wait for the doctor.
I hand my satchel and coat to Gideon and climb up, getting comfy as I lay back and stoke my growing belly while we wait.
It was hard to believe we were just over half-way through the pregnancy already.
The baby lets me know they are wide awake and excited for the scan as they move around, kicking me under my ribs.
I must make a noise or something, because Gideon places his hand near mine and grins when he feels the restless baby too.
I hadn’t even paused to consider the fact that my boss had followed me into the appointment room and was by my side.
While I’m wondering whether I should ask him to leave, Zion strolls in and grins.
Gideon tenses beside me at the presence of another alpha and I lay there, my gaze ping-ponging between the two.
“So,” Zion says with a mischievous grin, as he sits on a little stool with wheels beside the bed and flips through my patient notes.
“This must be the baby’s father.”
I sigh, rolling my eyes.
“No, he’s?—”
“Yes.” Gideon cuts me off as Zion raises a brow.
“I am. So, doctor, how’s our little jellybean doing?”
Zion gives me a look before motioning for me to roll up my shirt.
Grabbing the bottle of gel from a warmer, he squirts it liberally on my stretched stomach.
Moving the little handheld attachment over my bump, he brings up a grainy image on the screen and a fast, fluttery noise fills the silence.
Gideon’s hand is warm on my shoulder as he gives me a comforting squeeze.
I should just tell him.
He must know that I never intended to trap him—that I wasn't a gold digger. I wouldn’t expect anything from him…but he should know.
“Nice strong heartbeat.” Zion nods as he continues to check the screen. “Did you want to know the gender?”
I arch my brow at Gideon, since apparently, we were here together, and he was speaking for us.
“Yes, please.” He grins, his smile wide and there are creases by his eyes as he takes my hand in his and brings it to his lips. It was all too natural. Too gentle. Too loving. Ignoring the emotions surging up inside me, I turn back to the fuzzy shapes on the screen.
“Okay. Well, dads, your little boy is doing fantastically. He’s right on target for weight and growth, and the scan isn’t picking up any abnormalities.” Zion clicks the roller mouse a few times, and behind him I can hear a printer.
“We’re having a little boy,” Gideon leans in and whispers in my ear before kissing the top of my head. I know it was pretend, him just keeping up appearances in front of the doctor, but it was making me feel tired and worn out.
Zion notices, as he hands me a wipe for the gel. “I know you Rowan, so make sure you’re resting, eating well and not working too hard.”
Wiping away the stickiness, I right my clothing and swing my legs over the edge of the bed to sit near the end. I’d been trying to take better care of myself, but it was becoming more difficult to make sure I was still performing at my best at work. Baby brain was a genuine thing, and so were the rampant hormones that made me want to cry at least four times a day. I’d been deadly serious when I told Gideon a baby wasn’t going to affect anything up until it was time for me to fully hand everything over to Henry. I’d just underestimated how hard that was proving to be.
Zion hands me the printed images in a cute little envelope. “I also want to stress that you may notice an increase and instability in your pheromones during this trimester. Regular infusions of alphas pheromones and ejaculate should help to balance that out.”
What? Did he just…say what I think he said?
“Any questions?”
Questions? I was still processing the need for cum to calm the hormones!
Gideon offers me my coat and bag, sounding entirely too interested as he asks, “Isn’t sex dangerous for the baby?”
With a humming noise and a quick look in a drawer, Zion produces a leaflet about sex during pregnancy, handing it to Gideon with another one of his smug smiles. “No, as long as you aren't trying anything too adventurous. In fact, we recommend regular sex unless you experience any discomfort or pain. And be careful when knotting, it can be great for stretching the muscles ahead of birth, but don’t go overboard.”
Stretching the muscles ahead of birth? Goddess, was he trying to make my brain explode? I was already hormonal and horny, and now he was placing temptation in my path.
“Zion…” I warn, tugging on my coat, struggling a little to do it up around my expanding waist. Gideon has wandered ahead, back into the waiting room, reading the leaflet as he leads the way.
“Yes?”
I raise a brow and nudge the doctor. “What are you playing at?”
“He’s the father, isn’t he?” His eyes twinkle mischievously. “I’m advising you the same way I would any of my patients.”
When Gideon’s driver doesn’t return us back to the office, I’m confused but secretly relieved. When he then follows me up to my second-floor apartment and joins me inside, confusion is only one emotion at play.
The appointment had taken it out of me. I’d loved seeing our baby, seeing him happy and healthy on the screen and hearing his heartbeat, but my guilt and indecision over telling Gideon was tarnishing the whole thing. I was almost too tired to protest at his presence. But he was still my boss, and it was time to re-draw some boundaries.
Helping me peel off my coat, Gideon hangs it up and places my satchel on the small table by the door. As if he lives here with me, he slides his shoes off and adds them to the rack next to mine before gently guiding me into the living room and onto the sofa.
“Woah, what are you doing?”
“The doctor said you need to rest,” he warns me in a serious tone. I feel like I'm living in another world or tripping off my balls as I watch Gideon Carrington, millionaire business tycoon, potter around my kitchen, making me herbal tea in his socks.
“Okay, and I will.” I slide forward, intending to push to my feet, but it takes a little more maneuvering than usual. “Gideon, get out of my kitchen—you’re my boss.”
“No. Right now, I’m just Gideon.” He comes back and hands me an apple he’s taken from my fruit bowl. “Your friend. And one time lover. Eat this while I order some groceries. Why is your fridge empty?”
“It was technically more than one time…” I quip as a blush spreads across my skin as I bite into the fruit. Gideon taps out something on his phone while rummaging around my cupboards. “And I haven’t been to the store yet.”
“What was that?” he asks with a smile as he returns with the herbal tea in hand. He’s removed his tie, tucking it into his pocket and undone a few of the buttons on his shirt. His jacket is draped over one of my chairs.
“Nothing.” I grumble as I swap the apple core for the steaming mug. Why does he look so good in my apartment, like he belongs here?
“Let me take care of you. For my peace of mind.”