Chapter Nine
Bernard
Friday, April 24
BERNARD AND SARAH pulled into her driveway on Friday evening. He’d brought a change of clothes, so he didn’t have to go home.
Sarah and John lived in a two-story home in Oakwood Estates. Each home came with a well-manicured lawn, a two-car garage, four bedrooms, three baths, and garbage collection included. John was a real estate agent and got their home with a low interest.
“Honey, we’re home,” she called out.
“Hi, dear,” John said.
He walked into the living room with an apron on and kissed her.
“Hey, John,” Bernard said.
“Hey, Bernard.” He hugged Bernard. John had limited boundaries. He loved to hug, fully confident in himself. Bernard respected him for it. It could be off-putting to others, but Bernard didn’t mind.
“Can I use your bathroom to change?” Bernard held up his overnight bag.
“Of course,” Sarah said.
Bernard undressed and looked at himself in their full-body mirror. He didn’t have a full-body mirror. They’d always made him uneasy. He rubbed his hands over the hair on his chest and belly.
I like men who look like me. Why can’t I like myself?
Taking Sarah’s advice, Bernard searched his image for things he liked about himself. He smiled as he saw his soft brown eyes looking back at him. Eyes that cared. Eyes he loved.
He pulled on jeans and a polo for dinner, stuffed the rest of his clothes in his bag, and opened the door.
Kelly stood on the other side.
“Oh, sorry, Bernard.” He backed away. “I didn’t know you were in here.”
“I’m done. It’s all yours.”
They skirted around each other in the hall, and he made his way to the dining room.
When Kelly rejoined them, John put out plates of roasted garlic chicken, roasted potatoes, and steamed veggies. He gave everyone except Bernard a glass of red wine, instead placing a glass of water and soda in front of him.
Bernard took in the combined aroma of all the food. His mouth watered. John always cooked everything to perfection.
“John, this looks amazing,” Bernard said.
“It is my specialty.” John smiled.
“He doesn’t make it often,” Sarah said. “But when he does, it’s always fantastic.”
“Remember when we were kids, we’d sneak into the kitchen to cook something?” Kelly asked with a chuckle.
“We got into so much trouble.” John shook his head fondly.
“We also made nothing that tasted good.” The men laughed. Kelly had a pleasant laugh. Genuine.
Bernard savored each bite of the meal. The chicken melted in his mouth. He inhaled the scent of the potatoes. John covered everything in fresh Gilroy garlic. Although John came from Washington, he’d acclimatized to the Gilroy way. The garlic capital of the world. Each summer the town held its garlic festival. Bernard’s family attended every year when he was a kid. He hadn’t gone since he was a teenager. It wasn’t the same without his mother.
“Kelly, do you want to share your good news?” John said.
“Huh,” Kelly said. “Oh, yeah. John helped me find a house today.”
“That’s great,” Sarah said. “Where is it?”
“It’s down on Newport Ave, next to Wish Street,” Kelly said.
“That’s just a few blocks from me,” Bernard said.
“Great. I’ll know someone in the neighborhood.”
“It’s a nice, quiet neighborhood. I’d be happy to introduce you to the people I know.”
“That’d be nice,” Kelly said.
Bernard caught Sarah’s eyes. She smiled at him and nodded toward Kelly. Bernard shook his head and mouthed “no”. She just grinned at him and took another bite.
Bernard shifted to face John, who averted his eyes. Sarah had pulled John into her scheme. John found the perfect house for Kelly near him. John had multiple listings as a real estate agent. Bernard paused. John didn’t sell houses in his neighborhood. Did John give up a commission to help find Kelly a house near his? They were going through a lot of trouble to set him and Kelly up.
John cleared the plates and brought out his bread pudding. Bernard took in the decadent cinnamon and custard. He dug in as soon as the food hit his plate. Delicious.
“Will you need help?” John asked.
“Yeah, most of my stuff is in storage. I should be able to move in the first week of June,” Kelly said.
“We can plan a weekend to move your stuff,” Sarah said. “I’m sure Bernard would love to help.”
“Of course, I’d be happy to help,” Bernard said. “I have a truck. It’s small, but I can haul a few things.”
Bernard looked over at Sarah. She smiled and winked at him. He didn’t like her plans. He’d made it clear what he wanted, but Sarah wouldn’t give up. Bernard was happy now. He’d reunited with Rory, reconnected with Sean, and just met Kelly. He didn’t need to muck up the waters by dating any of them.
“I’m going to go wash up the dishes and get everything put away,” Sarah said.
“Would you like help?” Bernard asked.
“No, you gentlemen can go into the living room and have a pleasant conversation,” she said. “And I’ll bring some drinks.”
“I insist.” Bernard stood and followed her into the kitchen.
Bernard helped Sarah put the leftovers into containers and get them into the fridge. She ran the water and rinsed off the food. She handed the dishes to Bernard to put in the dishwasher.
“So, what are you up to?” Bernard asked.
“Not much. John and I might head to the tennis courts tomorrow.”
“Not what I’m talking about. I mean, with me and Kelly?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“I met him accidentally last week, then John got him a house in my neighborhood where I know he doesn’t work, and you asked me to help him move? I agreed to make friends with him, but this seems like you’re trying to get us to be more.”
“I just thought you guys could become friends,” Sarah said. “You said you wanted more friends.”
“Sarah, I know you’re trying to help me,” Bernard said, “but I need time. I don’t want to rush into anything, especially with someone so close to friends of mine.”
“Fine, I’ll tell you why I’m going about it this way,” she said. “Kelly is extremely shy, has a past I won’t get into, and from what John has said, has trouble making friends now. I just want to help him. It has nothing to do with dating him, although that’s what it might look like. I promise.”
“That makes sense,” Bernard said. “I’ll do my best to be friends with him. However, I don’t know if I’d date him. He’s too close to you, and if it didn’t work out…”
“Bernard.” She put her hand on his shoulder. “It’s been seven years since, well, you know. You need to move forward. I know it’s scary.”
“How do you even know I’m his type?”
“I don’t,” she said, “but I know he likes husky men. I may have seen one of his videos while I was changing his bed linens.”
“You snooped?”
“No, I just opened the drawer, and there it was.”
“Okay.”
“And the cover had men that look like you. I don’t remember the title, but I think the word bear was there.”
Kelly watched bear porn? Bernard’s heartbeat increased. Kelly, lying on his bed naked, jerking off to porn. Damn, that would be hot.
“Okay, so he’s attracted to guys like me,” he said. “Physical attraction is only part of it. How do you know we’ll hit it off?”
“Well, I only met Kelly a few times when we went to visit John’s parents. He didn’t make it to the wedding…”
“Why’d you stop?”
“I can’t say why, I promised,” she said. “Anyway. John talks about him a lot. So, from what I’ve gathered, you might make a good pair. He’s so sweet.”
“I need you to trust me to know when I’m ready,” Bernard said.
“Okay, I’ll stop pushing.” She hugged him.
“I know you want to help,” Bernard said, “and he is attractive.”
“Right,” she said.
They rejoined John and Kelly in the living room. John cued up an episode of Unsolved Mysteries.
“Oh, I love this show,” Bernard said.
“Me too,” Kelly said.
They sat through the episode. Sarah, John, and Kelly enjoyed a glass of wine while Bernard drank his soda. He loved how Sarah and John never pressured him to drink. He found it hard at first. Seeing others around him drink while he had soda or water. Kelly didn’t mention him not drinking. How much had Sarah and John had told Kelly about his past? He didn’t want to think about what Kelly would think of him if he knew.
After the show, Bernard said his goodbyes. He hugged John and Sarah. Kelly held out a hand to shake, and Bernard took it.
“Thank you for a wonderful evening,” Bernard said. “I had a lot of fun.”
He walked to his car when Kelly called out his name. Bernard closed his eyes. What did Sarah tell him?
“What’s up, Kelly?” He turned around.
“I know what Sarah and John are trying to do,” he said.
“Ah, I thought you’d figure it out,” Bernard said. Sarah and John were not subtle.
“I chose the house because it was perfect for me,” he said. “I didn’t even know it was near you.”
“I’m not blaming you for anything. Sarah has done this before,” Bernard said. “Her heart’s in the right place. I’m just not in the right place.”
“Then we agree.”
Bernard stared into his hazel eyes. Kelly smiled.
“I’m not looking to date,” he said. “I had…” He wrapped his right arm around his left. His eyes shifted downward.
“You don’t have to talk about anything that you’re not comfortable with.”
“Thank you,” Kelly said. “I don’t think I’m ready to talk about it yet.”
“If you ever want to hang out, let me know.”
“I will.”
They shook hands and Bernard headed home.
Bernard walked to his backyard. One of the neighborhood teens came by once a week to mow his front and backyard for twenty bucks. The greenhouse sat, unused. It came with the house, but Bernard hadn’t done anything with it.
He thought it might be time to put that greenhouse to good use. He’d always wanted to learn to grow vegetables. No time like the present.