Nineteen
Leah
W e spent a couple hours at the creek, and the time went by in a blink of an eye before we decided to head back. We were hungry, tired, and my ass was sore from that ground. I looked back over my shoulder once right before we left and, for a moment, I visualized a little boy sitting on that fallen tree, singing to a dazed little girl in a tattered dress.
I smiled softly, brokenly remembering the sad little kids we were.
I wanted to tell that little girl I was sorry for what was to come. When I caught Carter looking back, too, I wondered if he wanted to tell the little boy the same thing.
When we emerged from the bush, I stared around for a moment, confused. Carter had his hands on his hips, looking at the empty space in front of him with an equally empty expression.
For several seconds we didn’t say a word, and then, out of nowhere, Carter burst out laughing. “You’re fucking kidding me, right?” he said with a shake of his head. “This is unreal.”
“Your car’s been stolen,” I stated the obvious.
“You’re telling me.”
“I warned you.”
“You did.”
“I’m right.”
“Always.”
“This is awkward.”
“Very. I mean, they were fucking fast.”
I nodded. “Very impressive criminals. Unless you left the key behind.”
He pulled out the key from his pocket. “Nah, they fully stole it the impressive way.”
“Imagine if they put their genius to actual use. They could have solved world hunger.”
He laughed again and glanced down at his watch—a watch that wasn’t the size of a fist like Rome’s. It was mid-day. We’d been out for hours, and now we were stranded, letting the situation sink in.
What were the odds, really?
Clearly high.
Then again, this could have been fate’s intervening hand. It’d have been nice if the bitch had done something less evil than stranding us in a rough area, just far enough out of civilisation that anything could happen.
I hoped my sneakers weren’t going to be found on the side of the road.
I dug my phone out of my pocket. “Who should we call and grovel to? There’s Rome, and there’s Melanie. We can flip a coin if we’re unsure. Rome will be angrier at you, whereas Melanie will tear my ass a new one.”
He smirked. “Why would she tear your ass a new one?”
“She’s been warding me away from you.”
“Ah, that’s right. I’m the bad guy. That’s nice.”
“You’re not a bad guy.” I rolled my eyes.
“I’m going to forever be branded the asshole that hurt you, Leah. So, yeah, I’m definitely the bad guy.”
I sighed and turned to him. “Carter, it doesn’t matter what people think.”
“It matters what people think when they’re close to you ,” he replied sternly. “And I’ve been in the dark the last three years because nobody wants to let me know how you’ve been. It wasn’t easy being shut out like that. It especially wasn’t easy knowing you were avoiding me, too.”
“Hey,” I suddenly said, grabbing at his arm. “I’m here now, and that’s what matters. We just had an amazing day together. Let’s not ruin that, alright? Let’s keep this positive.”
He stared at me for a moment, sighing in defeat. “You’re right.”
“Forget Melanie. How about we just call Rome?”
He idly scratched his jaw, staring from one side of the road to the other. “How about we call neither?”
“Neither?”
“Yeah, let’s just walk and see where it takes us.” Turning to me, he added sheepishly, “I just don’t want this to end. The second we bring people we know into the mix, it’ll be like we’re back to the present, and I’m loving reliving the whole past thing and pretending it’s just us again. Right here and now, I’m just Carter and you’re my Leah.”
You’re my Leah.
Fuck. I was fucked.
My body warmed. “I’d like that,” I quietly agreed.
“Good. Let’s go on our little adventure.”
*
The adventure sucked. I’m not even going to lie.
It was a miserable walk.
The humid air was stifling, and it felt like any moment the skies were going to finally burst with rain. Lord knew I needed that rain! I felt my thighs rub together uncomfortably as I got covered head to toe in sweat. All those nights on the couch had resulted in a body that couldn’t hack a bit of walking. I needed to hit the gym.
Regardless, I wouldn’t have traded it for the world. There wasn’t one moment of silence between Carter and me. We fell into a never-ending conversation. It really was as though we’d been plucked from the present and thrown into the past.
We didn’t pay attention to where we were going. We didn’t care, either. At one point, Carter took his hat off and put it over my head, wanting to shade me from the sun’s bite.
“You look adorable like that,” he complimented me. “All flushed cheeks and a trucker hat. It’s giving me a new fantasy.”
I blushed and looked away, trying to downplay that. “Yeah? What does that fantasy involve?”
“You might not like hearing it.”
“Why?”
“It’s pretty graphic, and after last night, it might overstep our boundaries.”
I laughed and glanced at him briefly, taking in his heated look as I replied, “I thought we were going down memory lane. Last night’s events doesn’t apply. It’s just you and me without all that bullshit between us. So, involve me in your fantasy.”
He scanned me up and down slowly, and I felt like every inch of me was a goddamn bullseye.
“You’d be riding me naked with nothing but that trucker hat on you,” he told me quietly, without one drip of humour. “I’d be holding your hips, squeezing them as you moved, sucking on your beautiful tits as you went. I’d let you take complete control until every sexy bit of you was satiated. Then I’d pound the hell out of you and fuck you ‘til you came again.”
Despite the godawful heat, goosebumps broke out of me. I felt a shiver run through my being, tickling me in places I secretly wanted him to explore again.
“You’re blunt,” I muttered. “I missed that.”
He smiled widely. “You can have my bluntness anytime you want.”
I looked down at the asphalt as we walked for a few moments in silence. I kicked a small rock, replaying his words in my mind.
Jesus, the images were branded in me.
“I like your fantasy,” I admitted.
“There’s plenty more there for you.”
I fought against a goofy smile just as a car came bounding down the road, disrupting the tension between us.
“You guys alright?” asked a male driver, slowing down beside us. He was only young, in his twenties, driving a truck with two round stacks of hay bale in the back. A farmer. Or maybe an axe murderer disguised as a farmer, although unlikely.
Carter looked down at his feet to keep the man from seeing his face. “Yeah,” he answered. “Perfectly okay.”
“You just look stranded, that’s all,” the driver continued, looking over at me. “You okay too, Miss? There’s a motel some kilometres away if you wanted a lift someplace close.”
I looked over at Carter. “Should we get a lift?”
He shook his head, whispering to me, “Nah, we don’t know who he is. You never know around here.”
“No, but thanks anyway,” I told the driver.
He stared at Carter for a beat longer before nodding. “Take care,” he told us, before taking off down the road.
Despite him being right, I was a little bummed. I could have used a lift. My legs were a little sore and I was seriously thirsty. It was nearing the evening, and daylight was beginning to dim. Regardless, I sucked it up, and we treaded a couple more kilometres before the motel came into view. By this point, the sky had finally opened up. Drops of rain lightly scattered all around us, instantly cooling down my flushed skin.
I smiled up at the Vacancy sign of the motel before giving Carter a nudge. “This is the motel we ran off to.”
He chuckled, following my line of sight. “Yes, it is.”
“You broke into a car in that parking spot exactly.” I pointed to the parking lot and at a particular space a small little hatchback was sitting on. “This is like the ultimate trip down memory lane.”
“No, busting into a car would be.”
I laughed. “Let’s omit that part.”
Studying the motel for a moment, he turned to me and said, “Let’s do it then.”
“What?”
“Let’s spend the night here. It’ll be like coming full circle again.”
“But what about Rome and…?” My voice trailed off as we came to a stop right in front of the sign.
“What about ‘em?” Carter asked on a shrug. “It’s just you and me. Forget the rest of the world for a moment. What do you want to do? Go back to your apartment, stalk me online and go to sleep, regretting not being with me? Or buy a night at this shit-house motel, eat nasty vending machine snacks, and spend the night talking? It’s up to you.”
The drops came down a little harder now, and I glanced around the barren streets, unsure of what to do. I knew what my heart wanted, and for once my brain wasn’t spouting its stupid logical drivel.
It didn’t need to.
I wasn’t slipping, I suddenly realized.
I knew I was strong enough to pull my phone out and call Melanie. I was sure I could be away from him; that I could be in my bed in a matter of hours if that was truly what I wanted. And that was the first time I actually admired myself because I didn’t feel consumed enough in someone that it was out of my control.
I was in control, and I could decide to stay or go. Just like how I’d decided not to see him yesterday. I’d grown enough to be okay with either.
That Carter-induced haze had cleared.
I stared up at him, saw the rain pelting him, sticking parts of his hair to his beautiful, chiselled face. His plump lips were soaked, his eyelashes coated with water drops, his t-shirt pressed against every inch of his torso, giving me a glorious view of those abs.
In all seriousness, would any girl walk away from this?
“Okay,” I finally said on a firm nod. “Let’s do this.”