CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
Rori put her notebook into her Bible cover and zipped it up. She had spent time reading the Bible and praying that morning after she woke up. But now it was time to get ready for church.
That week had been weird for her. She and Lee might not have ended their relationship, but things were far from normal for them. He’d returned to full days at work, and he didn’t look as haggard and exhausted as he had the previous week. However, he was still subdued, and she often caught him spacing out, like he was somewhere else in his mind.
And he probably was.
The news he’d learned had changed a lot for him, and Rori knew he was still struggling to cope with the information. Thankfully, while he might not be back to normal, he was back to talking to her every day.
She really missed his smile. But more than that, she wished that she could spare Lee from the pain that plagued him. It hurt her that he was hurting. Especially because there was nothing at all she could do beyond praying for him.
After she ate a bit of breakfast, Rori got dressed, then curled her hair and put on a little makeup. She hoped Lee would be at church that day. He hadn’t attended since he’d learned about his past. But if he was back to working full time, perhaps he’d be back to attending church, too.
She hadn’t asked, however, because she hadn’t wanted to pressure him to do something he wasn’t up to yet.
After she was ready, Rori gathered her things and headed out the door. Rather than walk through the gloomy basement hallway to the back entrance, she decided to head out the front door and then walk around the building to the small lot where her car was parked.
A sunny day greeted her as she stepped out of the building. Rori blinked a few times as she looked up at the clear blue sky. It was going to be a perfect day to go to the park, but she hadn’t decided if she’d join the others or not.
She probably should go, since she was building friendships with Carisa, Charli, and Janessa apart from her relationship with Lee. He didn’t need to be there in order for her to spend time with them.
She’d see how she felt following church.
Movement caught her eye, and she looked over to see Lee leaning against his car, watching her. Her heart-rate sped up as she stepped onto the grass and headed toward him.
“Hey!” She smiled as she neared him. “What are you doing here?”
“I wanted to see you,” Lee said as he straightened. “I know I could have called, but I decided to just take a chance that you were leaving at our normal time.”
“So you’ve come to drive me to church?”
Lee nodded. “If you’d like a ride.”
Rori’s smile grew. “I would very much like that. I’ve missed you.”
After a brief hesitation, he stepped closer to her and held out his arms. The tightness in her chest loosened as Rori moved into his embrace. Something finally settled within her as he held her close.
Emotion choked Rori as she leaned into him, so grateful to feel the security of his arms around her. She had really missed him. Had missed them.
When ROri felt Lee inhale deeply, then exhale slowly, she wondered if he had felt the loss of their connection like she had.
“I guess we’d better go so we’re not late,” Lee said as he slowly moved his arms from around her.
Though Rori would have liked to just stand there with him, relishing the moment, she knew he was right.
He turned and opened the passenger door for her, and she slid into the seat, feeling like they’d just taken an important step in the right direction of things returning to normal.
The drive to the church was quiet, but Rori refused to let that discourage her. His radio was tuned to a Christian station which played worship songs. It gave Rori hope that, although Lee was feeling shaken in his life, he wasn’t giving up on his faith.
After he parked the car, they crossed the parking lot to the doors of the church, hand in hand.
“Hey, you two,” Carisa said when she spotted them in the foyer. Jackson was at her side, as the two of them had become inseparable lately.
“Hi.” Rori accepted the hug Carisa gave her.
After going through most of her life with hardly anyone ever hugging her, Rori would take all the hugs she could get. As long as they were offered by people she felt comfortable with. Carisa and Lee were her top huggers, and she was fine with that.
“Are you feeling better, Lee?” Carisa asked. “That bug seemed to really wipe you out.”
“I am feeling better,” Lee said. “Still getting back to normal, though.”
Carisa smiled at him. “I’m so glad to hear that.”
Prior to their dating, Rori would have had a struggle with feeling jealous of Carisa’s interaction with Lee. But even with everything going on, she still trusted that Lee’s feelings for her were genuine.
Though he was struggling with a lot, she didn’t think he was questioning how he felt about her. It gave Rori the confidence and the strength to continue to embrace him and their relationship.
Life might be rough right then, but she prayed that they would be able to get through it with their relationship intact.
“Are you going to the park after the service?” Jackson asked.
Lee glanced at Rori. “Probably. If Rori wants to.”
“We’ll talk about it,” Rori said, needing to make sure that it was really what he wanted.
Since the service was starting soon, they all went into the sanctuary to find seats. Rori ended up sitting between Lee, on the end, and Carisa, who had Jackson on her other side.
Following the preliminaries, the pastor got up with his Bible in hand and took his place behind the podium. Rori opened her Bible and the notebook that was quickly filling with her thoughts and the notes she took each Sunday. She was going to have to get another one soon.
She would be forever grateful to Essie for the references of the Bible passages she thought would be important for Rori. It seemed each verse had been meaningful for one situation or another that she’d faced since becoming a Christian.
Lee held her Bible, finding the verses the pastor gave them while she took notes. It was a small thing, but she liked that it was them doing something together.
Following the service, Lee led her away from the rest of the group. “Do you want to go to the park with the others?”
From the way he asked, Rori thought that perhaps that wasn’t what he wanted, though he’d probably go along with whatever she preferred. “I’m happy to go, if that’s what you want, but if you’d rather not, I’m good with that, too.”
“I’d rather not,” Lee said.
He still didn’t have his usual spark, so his response didn’t surprise Rori. It was a bit disappointing because she’d hoped to spend more time with him. But she knew that she needed to adjust to Lee’s new normal and be grateful that he’d picked her up for church that day, so they’d been able to spend a little time together.
Lee greeted a few people as they walked through the foyer, but he didn’t stop to chat with anyone. Rori was fine with that. She still didn’t know a lot of people there, so most Sundays, she mainly chatted with Lee’s family and Essie and Al.
After they were in his car, he said, “I’ll swing by your place so you can change.”
“Change?” Rori turned in her seat to stare at him. “I thought we weren’t going to the park.”
“We’re not, but I thought we could go to that spot where we went on our first date.”
“Oh.” Rori smiled as she comprehended what he wanted. “I’d like that.”
“I’ve missed you,” he said. “So I’d rather have some time with just the two of us.”
“I’m definitely on board with that.”
The smile Lee gave her was small, but a smile was a smile. “Good. Once you’ve changed, we can swing by the store to pick up some food for lunch.”
Rori didn’t really care what they did, as long as she was doing it with Lee. He wasn’t pushing her away anymore, and for that she was extremely grateful.
“I’ll be right back,” she said when they pulled up to her building.
“I’ll be waiting.”
She grinned at him, then opened the door and got out. After hurrying inside, she quickly changed out of her church clothes into a pair of black shorts and a T-shirt. It was nothing fancy, but she would be comfortable.
Her camera bag was under the daybed, and she looked at it for a moment before deciding not to take it. She wanted to just relax and be present with Lee. There would be lots of other opportunities to take pictures.
It felt important to focus on Lee after everything that had transpired over the past couple of weeks.
When she got back to the car, Lee was waiting to open the car door for her. “No camera?”
“Not today,” she said as she slid into the passenger seat. Lee closed her door, then strode around to get behind the wheel.
It didn’t take them long to get to the store, where they picked up a cart and made their way to the food department.
Everything felt so normal as they debated over the type of bread, cheese and deli meat they wanted. Thankfully, their tastes were very similar, so they didn’t have to buy a bunch of different things. After picking up chips, drinks, and some brownies, they headed to the checkout.
Rori wanted to offer to pay, but they’d had a discussion about it shortly after they’d made their dating relationship official. Lee had said he’d welcome any treats from her—like the cookies—but since he was in a position to earn more, he felt it only fair that he pay for anything they bought while together.
Society would probably say that she should insist on at least paying her share, but it truly seemed to please him to do that for her.
That day wasn’t any different. He didn’t hesitate to pull out his wallet once everything had been rung through. After he’d paid, Lee handed her the bag with the chips and the bread while he carried the other two bags.
It was a sunny day, but it wasn’t super hot. Just nice and warm. Perfect for spending time out of doors.
“Did you let the others know we weren’t joining them?” she asked as he drove out of the parking lot. “Or should I text Charli?”
“I texted her while I was waiting for you to change. She was disappointed that we weren’t joining them, but she understood.”
“Have you told anyone besides your parents and Gareth what’s been going on?”
Lee sighed. “I haven’t. It’s hard to know what to do. I don’t like keeping such a big secret, but the more people that know, the bigger the chance that word of my survival would get out.”
“You don’t trust them to keep your secret?”
“Some of them I do, without question,” Lee said. “Like Gareth. But I still have some siblings who are young that might not be as discreet as they should be.”
“I suppose it’s unique enough that they’d want to talk about it with their friends.”
“Exactly. So I have no issue with the siblings here knowing, but the ones living away from Serenity… I don’t know.”
“They’ve gone this long without knowing,” Rori said as she watched the scenery change with their departure from Serenity. “Though I’m sure Charli, Jay, Janessa, and Kayleigh would like to support you.”
“Yeah. I’m still coming to terms with all of that, including the fact that my parents knew.”
He’d called her after he’d met with his mom and dad and shared what they’d told him. Rori had gotten the feeling that learning that his grandmothers had had a hand in hiding the fact that he was still alive had made Lee feel a little less disconnected from his biological family.
They had loved him enough to want to hide him away, giving up their chance to have a relationship with him so that he could live a normal life. He may have had the worst sort of parents imaginable, but now he knew he’d also had some very loving family as well.
When they reached the place where they’d been on their first date, Lee parked in the small clearing. They gathered up their bags and set off down the path. After they reached the clearing, they walked to one of the picnic tables, since they didn’t have a blanket with them.
Together they worked to set out all the food, then Lee chuckled when he realized they hadn’t brought paper plates.
“I’ve got paper towels in the car,” he said. “I’ll be right back.”
He jogged down the path, disappearing around a bend in the path. Rori sat down on the bench, taking a minute to just enjoy the peaceful surroundings. The only sound was from the rustling leaves and the birds chirping.
There was none of the noise she’d gotten used to in Denver. Even at the park nearest where she’d lived, there was always some sort of noise, usually the rumble of car engines or motorcycles.
It was rare that there was a complete absence of man-made noise, and Rori found she really loved it. Especially when she was sharing the experience with the man she loved.
When Lee reappeared, Rori watched him walk toward her, his long stride eating up the distance between them. He hadn’t changed, choosing to stay in the dark blue jeans and polo shirt he’d worn for church. Thankfully, since they were sitting in the shade, he shouldn’t be too hot. That, combined with the breeze, should mean he’d be comfortable.
“Picnic dining at its finest,” he said with a slight smile as he placed a roll of paper towels on the table.
“I think the food will taste just as good,” Rori reassured him. “I’m not worried about it.”
Lee swung his leg over the bench and settled across from her. “I’m glad. I feel like I’m forgetting a lot of things these days.”
“You have a lot on your mind,” Rori said. “I’m not sure what my excuse is.”
Reaching across the table, he laid both his hands palms up. Rori smiled as she placed hers in his.
She expected him to pray right away, but instead, he said, “Thank you. Thank you for sticking by me as I’ve dealt with all of this.”
“It wouldn’t be much of a relationship if I bailed at the first sign of trouble. I’d like to think you’d stick it out with me, too. Had the roles been reversed.”
Lee nodded. “One of the things I told myself when we started to date was that I’d be there for you in a way no one else ever had been.”
“So let me be there for you. This is a two-way street. I know you were trying to protect me, but I’ve been taking care of myself for a long time,” Rori told him. “I know when it’s okay for me to take a risk and when it’s necessary to protect myself. Just like how I know when it’s necessary to stand up for myself and when to let others get their jabs in and walk away.”
Lee smiled at her as his fingers tightened, and for the first time in two weeks, Rori saw his features truly relax. He looked like the old Lee.
“When I first got to know you, I thought you needed help and protection, but you’ve proven me wrong on both counts. You’re strong and able to stand on your own. I’m blessed that you’ve chosen to use your strength for me. For us.”
“There was no way I couldn’t,” Rori told him as she clung to his hands. “I love you too much not to fight for you.”
“God knew that you were the woman I needed in my life. I can’t imagine living out this new life I’ve discovered I have with anyone else but you. It’s you and me,” Lee said, his love for her glowing in his eyes. “Forever. If that’s what you want.”
Rori’s breath caught in her chest as the meaning of his words sank into her. Forever? No one had ever wanted her forever. They hadn’t even wanted her for the moment.
“Forever?” she asked. “Like married?”
“I’m not asking just yet, but it’s what I want to happen one day.”
“I want that too.” Please, God, let this be what our future holds.
Lee lifted her hand and pressed a kiss to the back of it. “I love you so much, Rori, and I’m ready to fight for us with you. Whatever lies ahead.”
He got to his feet, drawing Rori up to hers, then he leaned across the table. Rori met him halfway, pressing her lips to his with a smile. It was a brief kiss, but it was full of hope and love.
But mostly it was full of the promise of forever.