Chapter 50
JACK
Jessi leads me to her bathroom and directs me to the toilet lid. After sitting down, I watch her unravel bandages and open packets of gauze. She meticulously sets out all of her supplies.
I underestimated her. I should’ve listened to her more, trusted her, thought of her more as a woman than a kid.
She comes at me with Neosporin and hydrogen peroxide. “This might burn,” she says with a wince.
“It’s fine,” I tell her, though when she dabs my skin, I shift a little.
Jessi wraps some bandages around me then inspects every cut on my face and hands. When I breathe her in, she smells like lilacs. I take a big inhale of her, savoring the scent.
Her eyes fly to my face. “Are you okay. Need a break?”
I smile, embarrassed that she caught me smelling her like a creeper. “No, it doesn’t hurt. You smell good.”
She peers at me sweetly. “Well, thank you.”
My hands find the backs of her thighs and curl around them. She’s so small that my fingers wrap halfway around her leg. She rests her hands on my shoulders, our eyes never leaving each other.
I squeeze her thighs. “Thank you for taking care of me. No one has done that before.”
She pales. “I’m sorry that I had to. It’s my fault you were hurt, but you’re welcome.”
I tighten my grip on her and shift her closer.
“I would go to battle for you one hundred times, and then one hundred times more if it meant keeping you safe. I feel this overwhelming need to protect you.” She runs her hands through my hair and tugs me by the nape of my neck before kissing my forehead.
“Are you tired?” she asks.
“No. I need to burn off some of this adrenaline. I’m gonna grab a spare piece of wood to secure the door for now and clean up. I should give Mike a call. He’ll need a heads-up if they want to bust up the club next.”
“You think they would do that?” Fear clouds Jessi’s eyes.
“I’m not sure, but it’s better to be safe than sorry.”
“I’m going to go to bed. I’m a walking zombie.”
She pivots to the door, but before she leaves, I grab her hand and thread my fingers through hers.
I’m unsure what to say, and how this will change things for us, but I don’t care.
I want her safe. “Will you sleep in my room? I can take the floor, if you’d like.
I’d feel better with you by me, in case they come back. ”
She bites her lip. Her eyes dart all around the room, likely a million thoughts racing through her pretty little head, before she says, “Um, sure. Let me change.”
“Hold on,” I say. I march to my dresser drawer and toss her a fresh shirt. She smiles, and it takes my breath away. All I want to do is make her smile like that forever.
I lay my pillow and some blankets on the floor closest to the door. I don’t want her to think that I expect anything from her.
When she walks in wearing only my T-shirt, I do a double take. Ugh. I must love torture, because I’m not sure how I’ll sleep knowing she’s in my bed dressed in nothing but my shirt.
“What are you doing?” she asks, her expression horrified.
“I wanted to lay the blankets out before you fell asleep, so I didn’t wake you.”
“Jack, we’ve slept next to each other on the couch more than once. I think it’ll be fine sharing a bed.”
My pulse quickens at the image of us in my bed together. “I wasn’t sure how you felt given everything that’s happened. I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable and risk you not wanting to stay here.”
“Don’t be ridiculous. You’ve been in two fights today, both because of me, and you think I’d make you sleep on the floor?” She crosses her arms and arches an eyebrow.
“Well, if you insist. I wasn’t looking forward to a night on the floor, to be honest.” Relief fills me as I pick up the blankets and she tosses my pillow on the bed.
“Do you want to watch a movie in here? You said you weren’t tired.”
She’s so damn cute. How can I deny her? “Sure. Put something on.”
“Fix the door and give Mike a call first, and then we can watch a movie.”
I call Mike and let him know what’s going on.
“Man, I told you she’d be trouble,” Mike says. “I hope this doesn’t blow back to the club and fuck up our deal with Tim. I’ll put someone on lookout. You get rest.”
After we hang up, I secure the door and sweep the glass littering the floor.
Thirty minutes later, I return to the bedroom. Jessi is fast asleep, her hair draped over my pillow. I shut off the TV and climb into bed. The mattress dips as I sink into it, and I become painfully aware of every inch of Jessi taking over my bed.
“You can keep it on,” she says with a yawn.
“Nah. I’m tired too,” I reply and hit the power button on the remote.
Jessi snuggles closer to me. We’ve fallen asleep together a few times, but this is different.
More intimate, more heightened. My heart aches at the sight of her so close.
I want my bed to smell like lilacs whenever I crawl into it.
I want her to be mine. To stay in my bed.
To kiss whenever I want. To slide into whenever I want.
I flip over. What am I thinking? Does she want me?
I have no doubt that she’s attracted to me, but she’s so young.
And a damned virgin. I’ve been around the block quite a few times.
What if she wants to do the same? I can’t imagine her with another man.
The thought of it makes my blood run cold.
If I had her, she’d be mine, and there would be no going back.
Then it hits me. Her dream. She wants to be a wife and a mother. She was upfront and honest about that, and I was too about not wanting kids. Then this has no potential to go anywhere, and maybe that’s her plan. I’m for now, not forever.
Fuck that. Some other man’s baby growing inside of her? No fucking way.
I study her, fast asleep. I need to keep her. For her to be mine. For the first time in my life, I wonder what it would be like to have kids—with her. Could I do that to make her happy? Learn how to be a parent with her? I like the sound of that.
I draw her close and decide to enjoy her in my bed. Right now, I’ll breathe her in and hold her. The big decisions can wait another day.