Chapter 17
Nathan kept catching himself smiling for no apparent reason at all, except for the fact that he felt happier than he had in a very long time.
He could have tried to convince himself that the look on his face was down to the fact that the bare bones of the kitchen construction had now been completed, or because he and Will had just signed on the dotted line to work with Rowan’s father on another very lucrative contract for the conversion of five farm buildings on the outskirts of Port Tremellien into executive homes, which would start in the spring.
But those things would have been a lie. The reason he was smiling was Rowan.
Nathan would never have believed they’d get this second chance after so many years, or that it would turn out that his feelings for her would never really have gone away, just been buried in an attempt not to compare every other woman he met to the girl he’d been in love with but had never had the chance to tell.
It scared him a bit, because he knew there was a possibility of history repeating itself and getting over her might be impossible this time around.
It had been hard enough the first time and even after she’d left Port Agnes with Katrina and Dean he’d held on to the hope that they might be able to pick up where they left off, but she’d ghosted him long before it was even a thing.
Their kiss hadn’t been his first, but it had meant more to him than any of the others and he hadn’t been lying when he’d told her that he’d thought about it for a long time afterwards.
By the time she’d come back to Port Agnes to stay with her dad he’d moved on, telling himself that the only reason he still thought about her from time to time was because of how abruptly it had ended.
If it hadn’t been for Leo and Theo’s friendship they might never have got to know each other again in any meaningful way, but watching Rowan with her children was like getting to know her on a deeper level.
She loved them fiercely and she would do whatever it took to make sure they had fun, even if it meant making a fool of herself by falling off a surfboard over and over again until Theo was laughing so much that he stopped being afraid to try it.
At first, he was more than happy just to have her friendship.
There was no denying that Theo’s presence brought joy to his nephew’s life, but spending time with Rowan had brought it to his too.
After Nicole had left him, he hadn’t been interested in anything serious.
Women either seemed to want him to live up to some kind of bad boy fantasy that just wasn’t him, or they suddenly viewed him as fundamentally untrustworthy when they discovered his past. He supposed it made sense in a way, but their assumption that he’d cheat on them because he’d been convicted of a crime was wrong.
He’d never been unfaithful and, even in more casual relationships, he’d never dated two women at the same time.
Maybe his certainty that Rowan would never date him was what had allowed them to get to know each other properly.
He’d just enjoyed hanging out with her and, even when they’d kissed again, he hadn’t been sure it would go anywhere.
He’d half expected her to pull out of agreeing to go on a date, but then it had happened and things seemed to take on a momentum all of their own.
Spending the night together could have been a huge disappointment, but that couldn’t have been further from the truth and he was as certain as he could be that she’d felt the same way.
If it had been just a way of getting her husband out of her system, she wouldn’t have asked him to stay the night, or been the one to reach out for him again the next morning.
She made Nathan feel wanted in a way he would have found it hard to describe.
Afterwards Rowan had made them breakfast, like they were a proper couple, and he hadn’t been able to stop himself from saying what was on his mind.
‘This has been incredible and I know there are all sorts of rules we’re supposed to live by in the dating world, but I’m horribly out of touch with them. So I’m just going to have to come out and ask if you’ve thought about what happens next?’
‘A fourth date?’ She’d grinned then, standing in her kitchen wearing an oversized T-shirt, her tousled hair looking so different from when she put it up for work, and he’d had to force himself not to reach out for her again, because they needed to have this conversation.
Suddenly she looked shy. ‘Does this make me easy, spending the night with you so soon?’
‘If you’re easy then so am I, but we’ve waited more than twenty years and if you count all the times we’ve been out together since you got back, it’s at least fifteen.’
‘That sounds far more respectable.’ She laughed, but he hadn’t been able to join in.
‘Does being respectable matter to you?’
‘It has to in my job.’ Shrugging, she reached for his hand. ‘But I want to do this again, because it really has been amazing.’
He couldn’t ask her for any more than that, and he’d understood when she’d suggested continuing to keep it just between them, ‘at least for now, so we don’t confuse the children.’
It was early days and he respected that Rowan’s children came first. There’d been a couple more dates and some get-togethers with the children, none of which had done anything to diminish how strongly he felt about her.
Quite the opposite in fact. Now it was the end of October and half term week, and they had a series of things planned to do together in the first few days, before James arrived to see Bella and Theo, after which they were hoping to grab the chance for more time on their own.
It might be way too soon to tell anyone that he and Rowan were more than friends, but if he couldn’t keep this stupid smile from spreading across his face every five minutes, it was going to give him away long before he had the chance to tell anyone anything.
Shutting the door to the byre, he set off to the main house to pick up Leo.
They were going to the cinema again with Rowan and her children and all he had to do was stop his face from revealing just how much he was looking forward to seeing her.
‘Is there something you’re not telling me?’ Will gave him an appraising stare the moment he walked into the kitchen.
‘What about?’ Nathan did his best to attempt wide-eyed innocence.
‘Whatever it is that’s making you grin like a half-wit every time I look at you.
’ Will peered at him again. ‘It’s the same expression you used to get when you’d set me up for something and you couldn’t wait for the pay off.
Like the time you sprayed Deep Heat into my swimming trunks.
When I got to the beach and put them on I couldn’t get out of the sea for about half an hour, until my balls had stopped burning. ’
‘That was a classic, you’ve got to admit.’ Nathan couldn’t help laughing. The two of them had spent most of their teenage years thinking up pranks to play on one another. It must have driven their parents mad, but it had bonded the two of them even closer together.
‘Stop trying to sideline the conversation, I need to know what you keep smirking at, because if you’re thinking of trying the Deep Heat trick again, just be warned that I’m fully prepared to wax your new handmade kitchen units with fish oil in retaliation.
’ Despite his threat, Will was laughing too and part of Nathan was desperate to tell his brother the truth.
‘I promise I’m not up to anything. Life is just good at the moment and who wouldn’t be smiling knowing they get to spend the day with Leo?’ Nathan winked at his nephew as he came into the room.
‘Is the film really going to be in 3D?’ The little boy’s excitement was written all over his face. ‘The dragons are going to look so cool in 3D.’
‘They really are and I got you and Theo one of these each, so you can look the part.’ Nathan handed Leo a sweatshirt depicting a scene from the movie they were going to see.
‘Thanks, Uncle Nathan!’ His nephew’s smile was broader than ever as he turned towards Will. ‘Look, Dad, it’s got my favourite dragon on it. Theo’s going to have one the same so everyone knows we’re best friends.’
‘That’s brilliant, darling. I’ll help you get it on, but I’m just wondering why your Uncle Nathan hasn’t got one for him and his best friend?’ Will raised his eyebrows, his lips twitching in the corners, even before Leo responded.
‘Do you mean Theo’s mum? Because she’s definitely Uncle Nathan’s best friend, he wants to sit next to her all the time.’
‘Oh, does he now?’ Will looked at his brother and laughed. ‘I suppose that solves one mystery; now let’s get you into this sweatshirt, Leo, so that you can both get off to meet your best buddies.’
Nathan didn’t even try to protest. It wasn’t a conversation he wanted to have in front of Leo and his face would probably just have given him away anyway.
Instead he started to gather his nephew’s things together and he’d just picked up the little boy’s jacket when his phone pinged with the arrival of a text from Rowan.
I’m so sorry, but we’re not going to make it to the cinema today.
James has turned up at the cottage in a terrible state and I can’t leave him.
I don’t know how it’s going to affect our plans for the rest of the week, but I’ll let you know when I do.
Please tell Leo I’m sorry and that I’ll make it up to him xx