12. Good Morning
12
GOOD MORNING
Magnus
Something tickles my nose, and before I can grasp who, what, when, how, a huge sneeze jolts me out of my contented sleep. I grab and squeeze my nose tightly, aiming to stop a second blast from happening.
As I process where I am — a small cabin on the large cruise ship — memories of last night flood back.
Gabriel. The incredible hand job. The deep and restful sleep on his chest.
Only now, I’m alone in bed. Even with my eyes still closed, I can tell. In fact, I'm sure Gabriel isn't even in the room. How do I know that? I don't know. But it's as if something — his presence — is missing. He hasn’t switched to his own bed sometime during the night to get some distance from the cuddle monster — aka me — he's just gone.
I open my eyes, and they confirm what I already knew.
How did I not wake up when Gabriel left the bed … and then the room? Normally I'm a light sleeper. Or maybe he had a crisis in the middle of the night and ran off after all.
My conscience gnaws at me. I should have insisted we talk through any issues he might have had last night. Although no amount of talking could guarantee he wouldn’t wake up with a panic attack. I slap my hands to my face and groan. The whole situation is a massive disaster.
Magnus, why couldn’t you keep your hands anywhere other than on the sexy hockey player Susan put in your room? I mentally yell. Before another groan rips from my throat.
Susan!
What will my best friend think about me jerking off her big brother?
Although during the conversation we had yesterday, I kind of got the impression that she’d set this up on purpose.
Oh, this family! A sister who can't keep her nose out of other people's lives, and a brother who’s an ace on the ice, has the hottest body I’ve ever seen, and a personality to match …
Sixteen more days! Sixteen days onboard this ship with both of them. Sixteen days with Gabriel in this tiny cabin. How the hell am I going to survive?
Without looking, I run my hand over the nightstand to find my cell phone I put there last night. But instead of cold metal, I feel a scrap of paper. Astonished, I sit up and reach for my cell phone and the piece of paper lying on top of it. The ship’s letterhead sits at the top of the page—it’s from the notebook on the small desk across the cabin. It takes me a moment to decipher the scrawled letters on it.
Gone to the gym.
Breakfast at 9?
Next to the writing is a giant hand-drawn smiley.
Gabriel
I return to our cabin at 8:45 a.m. after a great workout.
I woke up just after six a.m., and every fiber in my body screamed for exercise. After all of yesterday’s confusion, coupled with my poor sleep the night before, and the pleasant post-orgasm fatigue, I skipped my second workout. Today, my body demanded more.
Am I less confused? Not really. But I've come to terms with everything. I find Magnus pretty damn attractive, jerking him off was fun, and I enjoy spending time with him. And anyway ... a little vacay fling never hurt anyone.
When I unlock the door to our cabin, Magnus isn’t there. It shouldn’t be a surprise. I got the impression yesterday that he’s not a late riser. He's probably already in the breakfast room, or maybe at the pool, or somewhere with Susan and Klaus. It’s just I can't wait to see him again — which is a bit ridiculous, since I only left his bed a few hours ago.
I shower quickly and get dressed for breakfast and the dance class that follows.
As I'm drying off, I hear my cell phone beep. I left it in my pants pocket, so clad only in a towel, I go back into the cabin to fish it out from the pocket.
Maybe Magnus is messaging me, I think eagerly before realizing he doesn't have my number.
Daniel: Congratulations on winning the championship!
The text is from my old friend and fellow hockey player Daniel Miller. Just a few months ago we played on the Terengian national team at the Olympics and went on to win silver. So, despite the disappointment that it’s not Magnus messaging me, a smile creeps onto my face. The successes of the past season have almost been eclipsed by the past few days. That's how it should be on vacation — but this time there are other reasons beside simple holiday bliss.
As Daniel has no idea what’s going on, my response is basic:
Me: Thank you!
Daniel: You were really awesome — just like in the Olympics!
This message arouses my suspicions. Daniel isn’t the type to lay on the compliments usually. So, I decide to josh him a little.
Me: Shame your season wasn’t as successful as mine ...
A middle finger emoji is what I expect and what I get. I chuckle.
Daniel's team, the L.A. Kings, had unbelievably bad luck. In the second round of the playoffs, several players were injured. Despite this, they carried on. The all-important seventh game went into overtime, and a defenseman from the opposing team shot wildly at goal from the blue line — at an angle no one could have expected to land on target — and found the back of the goal. Daniel's team was out.
Ribbing him about it won’t make him really mad at me, and while I'm still looking at the screen, the three dots flicker again — he's typing something else.
Daniel: What are you up to?
Me: I'm on a cruise.
I’m not about to mention the tango course, my hot roomie, or the jumble of feelings in my head. Daniel is one of my oldest friends, but we hardly ever talk about anything other than ice hockey.
Daniel’s answer is an emoji that implies he’s jealous. If he only knew ...
Me: What are your plans for the summer?
Daniel: Not much. Nico moved to L.A. a few weeks ago.
This is news to me. Nico Hovenberg had been playing for the Toronto Marlies, and I had no clue he was transferring to an L.A. team. I’m happy for him! Although I have to admit that I’m a tiny bit jealous too. Another Terengian playing making it to the NHL, the famous hockey league, while I’m stuck in Sweden. Not that I don't love playing there, but ...
Me: Wish him good luck on the transfer from me!
An emoji that is laughing so hard, that tears are coming out of its eyes immediately appears on my screen followed by another message.
Daniel: Nope! Nico’s hanging up his skates.
What the hell? Why? He played brilliantly at the Olympics!
Anyway, if he’s not playing anymore, why is he moving to L.A.?
Then I remember …. And for a moment, I have no idea how to reply.
Of course, I’d noticed the “thing” Daniel and Nico had at our training camp for the Olympics, which I’m certain continued during our time in Beijing. But I didn't know it was serious. Before that, I didn't even know Daniel was gay, and I didn't know Nico well enough to assume he was either.
Me: Since when have you been gay?
Another laughing tears emoji comes through. And a little too late, I realize that my message was insensitive and rude.
Daniel: There are a few more letters in LGBTQIA+ ...
Okay ...
Me: You’re a lesbian?
Daniel: Ha ha!
Me: Bi?
Daniel: Full points. And to answer your original question … always.
This time his message is accompanied by an upside-down emoji.
My stomach immediately cramps at the questions this throws up for me — could I be bi? How do you know something like that for sure? And is that something I can ask Daniel?
Me: You never said anything.
I hold my breath as he types a response.
Daniel: You never seemed interested.
He’s added a winking emoji at the end of the message to reassure me, but the statement’s loaded. If he’s suggesting I’m not interested in him as a friend, he’s wrong. But if he’s suggesting I wasn't into him sexually, he's right, I’m not! Or is he suggesting I’m not interested in men? I wasn’t! But then a few days ago Magnus danced into my life, literally, and turned my world upside down.
Can I run this past Daniel? But what would I say exactly?
The seconds tick by and I wonder if I’ve got the guts to ask his advice before I miss my window. What should I do?
Magnus
After I read Gabriel's message, my mood instantly lightens, even though it annoys me to admit it. I find people whose mood is entirely dependent on their partner's mood a bit pathetic — not that Gabriel is my partner.
Lying in bed isn’t really my thing, so I get up even though it’s not yet seven a.m. and I have no idea what to do until I meet Gabriel in two hours’ time. The large pool on the main deck is tempting. But unlike yesterday morning, I remember to take swimming gear with me.
After a refreshing dip, a few lanes, and a little nap in the morning sun, I’m startled awake by loud children's laughter.
My cell phone reads 8:55 a.m. Damn! I'm supposed to meet Gabriel for breakfast in five minutes and I look like a scarecrow. I grab my towel and hurry back to our cabin.
When I open the door, I’m greeted by an unexpected sight. Gabriel is standing virtually naked in the middle of the room with only a small towel wrapped around his hips. He looks good enough to eat! His damp hair hangs over his face, and I follow the path of a droplet that falls from a strand onto his chest and trickles down over his sexy, sculpted muscles.
I have to suppress a groan as the moisture still clinging to him emphasizes the grooves of Gabriel's six-pack. Then I realize something. Gabriel hasn’t reacted to my presence — apparently he hasn't even heard me open the door. His posture is odd too. He’s standing slightly stooped over the cell phone in his hand.
I close the door behind me and move towards him. My first instinct is to take him in my arms, but I hesitate. Would he want that? I decide to compromise. I put my hand on Gabriel's shoulder just like I would with one of the guys. He jumps in surprise and stares at me, adding a stunned gasp for good measure.
I can’t help wondering what had him so many miles away, but I stop myself from asking. Instead, I ask a much more neutral question, a question I already asked him a few hours ago.
"Are you okay?"
"Yes, yes." Gabriel’s words are hasty and he snaps off his cell phone rather suspiciously.
Is he hiding something from me? Not that I have any right to know what he’s up to.
Argh! This whole situation is driving me nuts!
But then Gabriel tries to put his cell phone in his pants pocket — a completely automatic action — and because he doesn't have any pants on, the phone clatters to the floor. I can’t help laughing and all my worries fly from my head.
Gabriel shakes his head as if he’s just waking up from a dream, and his eyes take on a gleam as he joins in my laughter. His hand wanders to my cheek, seemingly of its own accord, and he gently strokes my stubble with the back of his fingers.
"I haven't really said hello to you this morning," he whispers.
A soft kiss brushes my lips making me melt.
"Good morning," Gabriel's soft words are like another kiss as the gentle flow of his breath caresses my cheek.
Only when I sigh contentedly do I realize how pent up I was. Luckily, Gabriel doesn't tease me. Instead, his mouth lands on mine again. And this time, it’s not the gentle good morning kiss of moments ago. This time, it's so much more.