Chapter Thirty-Five - Thalia
I GOT BACK late enough last night that I went straight to bed. The jet lag knocked me flat on my ass because I slept through when Sebastian and Owen left for morning workouts.
My cup of coffee is almost done when the front door unlocks, and the guys come shuffling in. Sebastian walks past to his room as Owen surprisingly pulls me into a hug, which isn’t the welcome back I thought I’d be receiving. I thought Owen would come out the gate yelling at me for not telling him I was leaving the country until it was already happening.
He ruffles my hair, smiling as he scans me to ensure I’m okay, before pointing to one of the bar stools. “Sit.” This is kind of scary. Owen is smiling, but the tone of his voice does not match it. Yeah, here comes the lecture I was expecting. I move sluggishly to the stool, realizing only as I sit that I left my coffee on the counter next to Owen. I could grab it, but I’m a little afraid of the lecture he’s about to give.
Instead, he leans against the counter, watching me carefully. This is weird. Owen is just staring at me, and I don’t want to stare back, but I don’t know where else to look.
Sebastian’s door opens, and he comes into the kitchen, giving me a questioning look as to why Owen and I are sitting here silently. “Sit,” Owen directs at Bash too.
“What? I have to get ready for class,” Sebastian says, grabbing his protein mix off the counter.
“Bash, sit your ass down on one of those stools and shut the fuck up,” my brother instructs, still smiling.
Oh fuck. I think we broke him.
This time, Sebastian listens, sitting on one of the stools.
Owen crosses his arms over his chest. “Consider this an intervention. I love both of you, but enough is enough. I have tried to let you dumbasses figure it out on your own, but I am sick of being stuck in the middle of it. I don’t care what you say or how long we have to sit here, but you two will talk and figure out if you’re together or not. Thalia, you just ran off to France without telling anyone after looking like shit for weeks. Sebastian, you’re letting whatever the hell is going on affect you at football. I’m sick of the guys getting onto me for you acting like a tyrant. So, now I get to babysit you both, and you’re not getting up until I say you can.”
Okay, yeah. This isn’t the lecture I planned on getting today. “You knew?” I ask carefully. It’s a stupid question since he obviously just said he knew, but I don’t know what to say.
“Of course I knew!” Owen scoffs, validating the stupidity of my question. “I know you guys think I’m an idiot or something, but my room shares a wall with Sebastian’s, and I’ve heard more than I care to. There are always flowers in the trash can; I’m not blind! You’re normally better at hiding shit, Bash, but you look at my sister like she’s the only person in the room.”
Sebastian tenses. “Look, Owen—”
Owen waves him off, not finished with his tirade. “Yeah, you suck. Thalia, you suck too. I mean, what the hell? You start fucking my best friend in the apartment we all live in and then don’t say anything to me?”
“It wasn’t just sex,” I correct his assumptions, sighing. “Owen, we were going to tell you after my birthday, and then we broke up because of Vera. I was mad—wait, did you know they hooked up over the summer?”
“I knew Vera’s always had a thing for him.” Owen shrugs as if this was the most obvious thing ever. “You were a surprise when I saw you two kissing at that party our sophomore year. You denied it, then you guys fought, you left, and he never said anything after that. I didn’t know they hooked up until your party.”
Sebastian chokes in surprise. “I’m sorry, you’ve known since sophomore year?”
Owen glares at him, clearly pissed at his best friend. “Yeah. I wasn’t happy then, and I’m not exactly happy now, but I’ll try to keep our friendship separate from you guys if you do the same. I don’t want to find a new best friend because I can’t send my sister back,” he says, and I realize how much I’ve underestimated my brother. I can’t believe he’s known this entire time. “Can we move on from this whole I knew the entire time to get to why I’ve put you both in time-out? Do you want to be together or not?”
I look at Sebastian only to find that he’s already looking at me. “Lia, you know where I stand. I want to be with you, but I’m not perfect. You need to trust me that I couldn’t care less about other girls, including Vera. I want you and only you.”
“I know,” I say immediately. Sebastian has been clear in his intentions, and now it’s my turn. “I feel horrible for how we left things. I’m afraid of letting you in because the last time I let a guy in…well, you know how that turned out. I thought the space would help me sort through the chaos of my mind, but all it did was show me how much I miss you. I want to be together despite how scary it might be.”
Owen clears his throat, interrupting the moment. Some babysitter Owen is if he’s already interfering with the progress we’re making. He could just pretend he’s not here. “Perfect. Glad we sorted that out. Don’t overthink it; you two are making this way harder than it should be. Congratulations, you can admit you care about each other! Now, find a way to make it work without making everyone else miserable. Just let me know if you need me to leave.” He shudders, walking past us to the bedrooms.
Sebastian looks at me, shell shocked. I feel the same way. “That all happened, right?”
“I think it did.” I cover my mouth to stifle my laugh, and Bash shakes his head.
“Do you think we should tell him we were already going to sit down and talk today?”
“Owen still would have made us sit here,” I say, grinning, and he chuckles.
“Yeah, probably.”
I look at Sebastian, analyzing every detail about him. It’s really good to be in the same room as him again. “So you were a tyrant when I was gone?” I ask, and he shrugs, looking away.I know that’s what Chris claimed, but I hoped he was exaggerating.
“That appears to be the consensus.” He sighs, getting up to finish making his shake.
I twist my hands in my lap, regretting not calling Bash again after he didn’t answer the first time. “I’m sorry for how I left. I didn’t mean to hurt you, but I also didn’t want to say something I would regret.”
Bash looks at me openly, his dark eyes fixated intensely on me. “I know you didn’t. I’m sorry for asking you to stay and letting Vera into the apartment. I should have known better.”
“It’s okay. You were being a kind person, and she took advantage of that. Your kindness is one of my favorite things about you,” I say, smiling reassuringly. Sebastian has many qualities I admire. “If it’s still on the table…I’d like to be with you and to give us a shot. I want us to have a fresh start.”
Sebastian puts his hands behind his head. Whatever he’s thinking is making me anxious. “Can I explain something first?”
It’s going to be okay. Whatever he says won’t change anything.I want everything that comes with being with Sebastian.
“Last June, I went to visit Mimi. It was awful; she didn’t know who I was at all. I’d never seen her that bad before, and it scared me because it became real that I was losing the last bit of family I had left. Mimi just kept screaming at me to leave her alone. She thought I was going to hurt her.” The raw pain on his face makes me want to hug him and never let go. Having Mimi not recognize me was awful, but Mimi didn’t raise me.
I can’t imagine being in Bash’s shoes. No one has ever mentioned family other than Mimi, but I hadn’t put together he’s basically alone. It puts more perspective on what Sebastian risked when he told me how he felt. I should have considered that my family is also his.
“I was in a shitty mood after I left. When I returned to the house, Vera was swimming in the pool because I’d told her she could use it. I started drinking, and Vera did too. We talked and swam, and I can’t remember how much I drank. I know it was a lot. I kissed Vera. I didn’t know she had feelings for me, or I never would have done it.” He shakes his head with regret. “It gets a little hazy after that, but I initiated it. I just wanted to forget how Mimi acted toward me that day, but I never should have gone there with Vera.”
Why am I sitting here? I stand up immediately, walking closer to him. I know I can’t take the pain away from him, but I can listen. I wrap my arms around Sebastian tightly. “I’m sorry.”
“Lia, I didn’t tell you so you would feel sorry for me,” he says, tucking his arms around me.I’ve really missed this feeling.
I lift my head to look up at him. “I don’t feel sorry for you. I’m sorry I didn’t listen before now. I should have, but I promise I’m listening now.”
The tight coil of his body pressed against mine relaxes. Sebastian cups my face in his hands. “A fresh start? Do you mean that?” he asks, and I nod the best I can with him holding my face.
His soft lips are on mine in an instant. I clutch Sebastian, pulling him closer to me as if we aren’t already plastered together. I can’t help but smile because I’m so glad my idiot brother forced us to be in the same room, even if we were already planning on talking, regardless of his intervention. Bash pulls away, murmuring, “Lia, if you smile, then I can’t kiss you the way I’ve been dying to kiss you.” Yes, please.
“We have plenty of time for that,” I say, unraveling myself to rest my hands on his chest. I can feel his heartbeat quicken underneath my touch, but if I don’t stop us now, I’m afraid we really will be giving my brother something to complain about. “Don’t you have a class to get to?”
His hands fall to rest on my hips. “Screw class. It’s the last week before Thanksgiving break; we’re not doing anything but reviewing today before our test on Friday. I missed you too damn much.”
I lean up to kiss him again against my better judgment. It’s unfortunately short lived. My brother interrupts, calling out down the hallway, reminding us of his presence. “I hate to interrupt, but Sebastian and I have classes to get to. If I could get past the two of you without seeing you kiss, that’d be great. I’d like not to have to burn my eyeballs. Bash, you’re my ride, so I hope you know skipping class to do whatever with Thalia is off the table, so let’s go!”
Bash groans and steps away, my body immediately yearning to feel his touch again. “Cock block!” He laughs as Owen walks out, waving his arms dramatically in the air to make his presence known.
“Say that again, I dare you,” Owen threatens, his backpack slung over one shoulder. “Don’t forget Thalia is still my sister.”
“Trust me, I won’t forget it,” Bash says, winks at me, and my heart races. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, and I have a feeling we won’t struggle to make up for lost time.
Owen groans, gagging dramatically. “Man, I can’t believe I’m okay with this. You idiots better stay together this time. You’re going to give me whiplash if this current cycle continues.”
“I guess I am going to class,” Sebastian relents, reluctantly grabbing his backpack from where he’d left it on the couch.
“Have fun.” I smile as Bash takes a few steps toward me with a purpose, leaning down to kiss my cheek gently. His stubble tickles my face, causing me to giggle softly. Apparently, one isn’t enough for Sebastian, who kisses me deeply on the mouth this time, despite Owen being in the same room as us. When he pulls away, I’m breathless. “We’re not going to be an almost. On va être un toujours.” I know he can’t understand what I’m saying, but Sebastian smiles anyway.
This time will be different.
There’s honesty and acceptance.
We’re going to be an always.