Chapter Nine
Jude
Living with Liam is easier than it should be.
And it’s troublesome. I don’t want to get overly attached, but I fear it’s already too late.
I not only crave him physically, but I also truly like him as a person.
He might be the first real friend I’ve ever had.
I’ve definitely never felt this connected to another shifter. Ever.
Two weeks in, we’ve fallen into a rhythm that feels disturbingly natural.
At least once a week we shift and run together at night.
It doesn’t seem to matter how tired we are or how brutal the shift was, we still find ourselves out there in the dark, paws on frozen ground, breath misting in the cold air.
Each time we run together, our unspoken connection grows.
During our runs is the only time I truly let loose and give into my need to be by his side.
Through dense stands of pine where the branches hang low and heavy with snow, he leads and I follow, trusting him completely.
We explore along ridgelines where the valley opens up below us, silver under the moon.
Sometimes we run hard, pushing each other until our lungs burn and our muscles ache.
Other times we move slow, winding through the quiet forest, pausing to drink from an icy creek or track a scent on the breeze.
We never talk about the night runs. I’m afraid to bring them up in case I spook Liam and he stops going with me. I’d hate that. It’s the only time it’s just us like that, our wolves set free, nothing held back. So I keep my mouth shut, and Liam never brings them up either.
In the morning, Liam usually wakes first. Most days I come downstairs and the coffee is already brewed and the kitchen smells like whatever he’s decided to make for breakfast. When I lived on my own, I was lucky if I had the time or energy to open a ready-to-drink protein shake.
But on most work days, unless we grab a breakfast sandwich at Happy Grounds, Liam cooks real food.
Scrambled eggs with chives one morning. French toast with cinnamon the next.
Pancakes and bacon on another day. He’s a domestic marvel.
My contributions to the mornings are less impressive.
Should I sometimes get up before Liam, I do make the coffee.
But I don’t try and cook us breakfast. I’m not even a little domestic.
Scrambled eggs are a challenge for me, I wouldn’t dare attempt French toast. But I do make a point of doing the breakfast dishes before Liam can get to them.
In fact, I do the dishes whenever Liam cooks.
I also keep the guest room spotless and stay out of his way when Kara comes over.
I’m determined not to create issues between the two of them.
I already know she’s not thrilled about me living with Liam.
She’s perfectly polite to me when she comes over, but I catch the troubled glances.
She doesn’t like me. I don’t think she even knows why, but something about me makes her uneasy.
This morning, I’m at the breakfast bar eating a bowl of cereal when Liam comes downstairs in his flannel pajamas.
He slept later than usual, and his dark hair is rumpled and his warm skin smells of the woodsy cologne he wears.
He’s hard to ignore because underneath the crisp cologne is the deep, earthy base note that’s uniquely him.
His scent pulls at something primal in me, which I try to ignore by shoving a spoonful of cereal into my mouth.
“Cold cereal?” He eyes my bowl with disdain as he passes behind me. “Didn’t we talk about this?”
“I don’t remember a talk exactly. I vaguely remember you lecturing me about nutrition and me ignoring you.”
His sigh is exaggerated. “There are eggs in the fridge. And bacon.”
“I don’t want eggs and bacon. I want Frosted Flakes.” That isn’t exactly true. I’d kill for bacon and eggs, but I’m too lazy and intimidated to try making them.
He shakes his head, like I’ve personally wounded him, and starts making his own breakfast. Within minutes, the kitchen smells like butter and sautéed onions. He’s making an omelet and it smells amazing.
“Show off,” I mutter, staring down at my soggy cereal.
He grins over his shoulder. “Don’t worry, I made it big enough to share.”
I brighten, shoving my cereal bowl away. “Yeah?”
“Of course,” he says softly. “Looking out for you is becoming a habit.”
He’s not wrong. He watches out for me constantly.
At first, I bristled when he hovered and did things for me.
Now I accept it’s just who Liam is. He can’t help himself.
He cares about everyone, including me. I’m not used to anyone caring, and instinctively, I feel like I shouldn’t like it.
But I do. I like it because it’s Liam. I’ll never tell him that, though.
I don’t want him to catch on that I’m attracted to him, drawn to him in a way I’ve never been to another shifter.
Today is the first day off we’ve had in thirteen days. In fact, we get today and tomorrow off. I’m almost giddy at the prospect. The last two weeks have been a relentless grind. Twelve-hour shifts, back-to-back calls, the ski resort churning out problem after problem.
Today, though, we have nowhere to be.
Liam splits the omelet between two plates and drops onto the stool beside me.
His knee bumps mine as he sets one of the plates in front of me, with a fork.
The contact is small, meaningless for him, I’m sure.
But the touch of his leg lights me up inside, the warmth of him sinking into me even through two layers of fabric.
“So,” he says between bites. “What are your plans for today?”
“I don’t have any plans other than maybe doing laundry.”
“Good. Me neither.” He chews and stares into space. “We should do something.”
Frowning, I glance at him. “Aren’t you seeing Kara?”
He shakes his head. “Tomorrow.”
I laugh gruffly. “I’d have thought she’d claim both your days off.” Kara hasn’t been subtle about feeling neglected. “Is she busy or something?”
“No.” He shrugs. “She tried to get both of my days off.” His lips twitch. “But I reserved one for you.”
My eyes widen and my gut tenses. “Wait. What? I… I didn’t say I wanted to hang out with you. She’s going to hate me even more now. You should call her up and tell her you’re free today.”
He scowls and meets my gaze. His eyes are a warm, dark brown with flecks of gold.
They might be the most beautiful eyes I’ve ever seen.
When I look into them, my entire body aches for something I know I’ll never have with him.
He loves Kara, and even if he didn’t, he likes women.
I know all of that logically, yet my heart still foolishly yearns for him.
Knock it off, idiot.
“If I wanted to hang out with Kara today, I’d have arranged that.” He sounds grumpy as he studies me. “Do you not want to hang out with me?”
I grimace. “It’s not that.”
“Then what is it?”
I look at him like he’s dense. “Kara will resent me if you don’t spend both days with her. I already have to tiptoe around her so she’s not upset. You’re making problems for me.” I take a big bite of omelet, but I don’t really taste it. I’ve lost my appetite because now I’m stressed.
He sets his fork down and it clatters against his plate. “Jude, I’m allowed to spend the day with you. Kara’s not my mother. Jesus, what’s the big deal?” He narrows his eyes. “If you don’t want to spend the day with me, just say so. I’m not going to kick you out or anything.”
“I know that,” I grumble. “I just don’t want any trouble with Kara.”
He sighs. “Well, I want to spend some time with you where we’re not chasing down drunks and belligerent asshole people. I thought we were friends, not just work partners.”
“We are.” I can’t deny the blip of excitement that shoots through me. But I try to tamp it down. Spending the day with me doesn’t mean to him what it does to me. I need to remember that. “Don’t you think we spend more than enough time together already?”
He swivels in his chair, his leg brushing mine.
“I want to have some fun with you. Off the clock. I want to just hang out with you, a dude, and enjoy our time together. Maybe we get shitfaced, scratch our balls, and watch sports. I want to do something other than be with Kara, is that okay with you?”
I can’t help laughing because what he’s saying makes me happy. I know I can’t read too much into it, but the fact he wants to spend today with me means a lot. “Okay, okay. I just don’t want Kara mad at me.”
“She has no business being mad at you. It’s my choice to spend the day with you.” He lets out a breath and gives a sheepish smile. “Sorry. I’m upset, in case you couldn’t tell. I’ve seen how you walk on eggshells around Kara, and to be honest, it’s pissing me off.”
I frown. “She’s your girlfriend, Liam. I’m trying to be respectful.”
He groans. “I’m not annoyed at you, I’m annoyed at her.” He turns back to his food and starts shoveling it in.
“Oh.” I go back to eating too. I’m not sure what to say. I appreciate he’s noticed that I’m trying hard not to upset Kara, but I don’t want him to get in a fight with her over me. That would only make my relationship with Kara worse.
After a few minutes, he says, “You like hockey, right?”
“Yes.” I meet his gaze. “I love hockey.”
He looks pleased. “The Miners are playing Calgary tonight. The game’s at 7:00 p.m. Wanna watch it with me here?”
I hesitate, but then say, “Sure.” I already expressed my worries about Kara. If he’s determined to spend time with me today, I’m not going to reject him. He’s a grown man. If he doesn’t mind upsetting Kara, that’s his call.
His face lights up. “Really?”
I shrug. “I was going to watch the game anyway. It… it’ll be more fun with you.”