Chapter Eleven #2
Liam smothers a laugh behind his wine glass and I give him a dirty look.
Even if I have no hope of finishing it, the spaghetti is outstanding. I’ve never had handmade noodles before and they’re definitely a step above boxed pasta. The sauce is tangy and the meatballs are dense, but tender and perfectly seasoned. Every time I take a bite, Viv gives me an approving nod.
“I expect this weather is very different from Atlanta.” Viv says, wiping the side of her mouth with her napkin.
I nod. “It’s probably more like autumn in Atlanta right now. Definitely more humid. The temperatures will dip next month, but it won’t be anything like here.”
“Do you prefer the weather there?” she asks.
I shake my head. “No, I prefer the weather here. I like the snow and the cold temperatures. Maybe that’s weird, considering I was born in Florida and lived in Georgia for so long. But it’s the truth.”
“That’s great.” She smiles. “Then maybe you’ll stay in Golden Peak.”
I return her smile, but I don’t comment. I have no idea what the future holds.
“How did you get into law enforcement?” Marco asks.
“It probably sounds lame, but I like helping people.”
Liam laughs. “Which is funny because he doesn’t really like people.”
I frown at him. “It’s a little more complicated than that.”
Liam seems to catch himself and his smile fades. “Yeah, I know. Sorry.”
Viv tops off my wine glass. “You don’t act like someone who hates people.” Her tone is warm. Conversational. “Why would Liam say that?”
It’s probably the wine loosening me up, but I decide I don’t mind sharing some stuff with Liam’s family. “It’s more I don’t trust people.”
Marco grunts. “Your line of work won’t help with that.”
I meet his gaze. “That’s probably true. Cops don’t see the best of people. We tend to stumble on them when they’re having a bad day.”
“Was your dad a cop?” Viv asks.
“No.” I can’t help laughing at the idea of that. “He spent a lot of time with cops though.”
In the back of their squad cars.
“Did he?” Viv looks confused.
Liam smiles, meeting my eyes. “I think Jude is making a joke.”
“Were you?” Viv laughs. “Sorry. It went over my head.”
I grimace. “My dad had anger issues and a drinking problem.” I clear my throat. “He got arrested a lot.”
“Oh.” Viv’s gaze is empathetic. “I’m sorry.”
I shrug. “It’s okay. I probably shouldn’t joke about it.”
Liam bumps my elbow with his. “Hey, if that’s how you handle it, that’s fine.”
I smile weakly. “Better than crying, right?”
Viv reaches across the table and squeezes my hand briefly. Her fingers are warm and comforting. The gesture is so simple, so maternal, it hurts my heart. What must have it been like growing up with a mother like her? I can’t remember a time when my own mom tried to comfort me. How sad is that?
“Well,” Viv says, going back to eating. “You’ve got people who care about you now.” She laughs gruffly. “Whether you like it or not.”
After dinner, she refuses to let anyone help clean up, which means Liam and I end up in the living room with Marco. The fire is low, casting warm shadows across the room. Marco settles into his recliner and Liam drops onto the couch next to me.
Marco asks me about the differences between policing in Atlanta versus Golden Peak.
The question is genuine, and I find myself talking more than I usually would.
When I describe some of the challenges of working in a big city, he nods in ways that tell me he understands, even if his career was spent on a mountain.
“Small-town policing has its own problems,” he says. “You know everybody. That makes it harder sometimes, not easier. Especially when we’re mostly all pack.”
“I’m starting to see that,” I say, meeting Liam’s gaze. I’ve seen Liam struggle with how to handle certain people in town. I know it’s because he knows them personally. He knows their history. Their situation. He doesn’t want to make their life worse than it might already be.
“Of course,” Liam says, “They also trust us more because they know us. The job is more personal in a small town.”
“Yes. I sometimes wished we could have done more community policing in Atlanta, but it just wasn’t how the department was run. Too many people to deal with.” If I’m honest, that’s why I went easy on Marcus Dougherty that fateful night. I wanted to handle him like a community cop might.
And David Kim ended up dead because of that decision.
Maybe Liam sees something in my expression because he frowns.
I’ve never told him about what happened back in Atlanta.
I’m too ashamed. Too afraid he might judge me for that decision.
Part of me wants to tell him because it would be nice to hear his take on the situation.
But I’m too scared to face his disappointment.
Liam’s mom joins us, carrying a plate of freshly baked oatmeal cookies and coffee.
Once she’s made sure we all have what we need, she sits on the arm of Marco’s recliner.
He puts his hand on her knee without thinking about it.
The gesture is automatic. Decades of love revealed with that one small touch.
My gaze shifts to Liam. I’ll probably never have a love like that.
The one man I can picture it with is already taken.
And even if he wasn’t, he’s not into men.
If I had any real survival instincts, I’d move out of his home soon.
Staying is painful. Knowing I’ll never have him is sometimes torture.
I tell myself his friendship is enough, but I’m lying to myself.
No wonder Kara hates me.
Around 10:00 p.m. we say our goodnights. The drive home is quiet. The roads are dark and the snow has stopped, the sky clear and full of stars. I enjoyed the visit way more than I thought I would. Liam’s parents are warm and kind.
When we walk into the house, Liam asks, “What would you think about going for a run?” He slips out of his coat. “I feel restless.”
“Do you?” After all the wine and food we had, I assumed he’d just want to crash.
“Yeah.” He avoids my gaze, rubbing his shoulder agitatedly. “I’m not ready for sleep yet.”
I unzip my jacket. “Oh, uh, sure. We can do that.”
“I thought it might be a nice way to end the evening.” He studies me, his eyes glittering. “But if you don’t want to, that’s okay. I can go alone.”
“No,” I say quickly. “I’d love a run with you.”
He nods his approval and heads toward the back door. “Then let’s do it. We’ll probably both sleep better if we burn off energy.”
We strip on the back porch like usual, the freezing air raising goosebumps across my skin.
I try not to look at Liam, and mostly succeed.
Mostly. It’s hard not to take at least a peek.
He’s got a gorgeous body. Lean, but muscular.
My mouth goes dry just looking at sinewy thighs and firm ass.
But I make sure he doesn’t catch me looking.
The shift comes on fast. Bones cracking, muscles reshaping, fur penetrating through skin. The pain is brief and then the world erupts into scent and sound. Liam shifts beside me, his black fur gleaming in the moonlight. He shakes himself once, and then takes off into the trees.
I follow.
We run hard tonight. Harder than usual. Through the dense forest and up along the ridgeline, our paws pounding the icy ground.
The cold burns in my lungs and the wind pulls at my fur.
Liam is fast, seemingly restless tonight.
I do my best to match his pace stride for stride.
It’s not easy because he has longer legs, but I don’t like being left behind.
We don’t play tonight. There’s an intensity to the run that feels different, charged with a buzzing energy.
At the ridge, we stop. The valley stretches below us, Golden Peak glittering in the distance.
Our breath mists and mingles in the frozen air.
Liam presses his nose into my neck as if scenting me.
I allow it and lean into him, feeling the heat of his body through our fur.
For a long moment we just stand there, under the vast starry sky.
As if we’re the only two wolves in the world.
Then he grunts and turns, heading back toward home, and I follow.
We shift into human form on the back porch. The cold bites my bare skin harshly, but my blood is still pulsing hot from the run. “That felt good,” I breathe, reaching for my clothes. “I needed that more than I realized.”
The memory of his hot breath warming the fur of my neck still lingers, but I don’t mention the intimate moment we shared.
He wouldn’t like it if I did. Liam prefers to pretend that what we do in wolf form means nothing once we shift back.
Since I want to keep running with him, I honor his need to keep the two worlds separate.
But I can sense his heartbeat still, and it’s beating faster than usual.
I turn, about to begin dressing, but I’m surprised to find he’s right there.
Closer than I realized. His dark eyes glitter with something wild.
He’s shifted back into his human form, but it’s as if his wolf still has a hold on him.
The primal look in his eyes makes my heart rate pick up, and my dick warms and hardens in response.
We just stare at each other, then he moves forward and I instinctively take a step back.
My nostrils fill with his scent, a mixture of wolf, man, sweat, and pine.
As I study him, I’m surprised to see his wolf is right there on the surface.
It’s bristling in his eyes, and in the way his muscles are coiled, and in the low rough sound of his breathing.
“Liam,” I whisper, a question in my voice.