Chapter 14 Meanwhile…
~ DIADRE ~
“I’m sorry to intrude on your time off, but it’s the only time I’ll be alone,” I murmured to the servant woman that Caelan had recommended.
From what I gathered, she had an extensive knowledge of herbs, and acted as something between an apothecary and a midwife for the servants and slaves in and around the palace.
Caelan claimed she’d proven her discretion time and again.
I hoped she was right. These people all knew me and knew who I belonged to, but it still felt risky, somehow, to speak of truly personal things. As if my mask might slip.
None of the women here knew I was a Fetch, except Caelan.
This woman’s name was Teen. Her shoulder-length brown hair, which was just beginning to gray at the temples, swayed as she waved off my apology. Her eyes were kind… and tired.
A low, distant rumble raised my head—was it thunder? The air groaned. Teen winced, and looked out the small, high window in her dark chamber, though night had fallen, so the only light came from her candles and a lantern in the corner.
“The Neph are celebrating,” she said, her brow furrowed.
“That’s them?!” I blinked—the Coliseum was a mile away as the crow flies. A mile of city. To hear them all this way…
Teen tore her eyes from the window and nodded, then gave me a kind smile. “We’ll hear everything when they return. For now, let’s make use of our time. How can I help you?”
It took me a moment longer to shift my attention from what must be happening out there. My jaw clenched.
When Jann insisted that I stay behind—that none of the Advisors were bringing their slaves, so it would be odd if he brought me—I was pissed. Especially when I learned Melek was taking Yilan.
But Jann was still so tense and attentive, and I’d been looking for a way to safely meet this woman… I’d put my anger aside to make use of the time.
Now, I wasn’t so sure.
What was happening? What was I missing?
“Diadre?”
I blinked and made myself focus. “Sorry, I just… sorry.”
“How can I help you? Caelan said you… had a question?” Her tone was kind and warm, inviting confidence. And utterly certain that she knew exactly why I was there.
I sighed. “Caelan told me that you had a… a test? A way to find out if I’m pregnant?”
She nodded and smiled, not surprised in the least. “I do. Have you had water recently? Do you think you can urinate for me?”
She walked to the end of the small chamber and opened a door to a closet, lifting the lantern from its shelf in the corner, and placing it inside while she explained that I needed to squat over the wide bowl on the stone in there.
When she was sure that I understood, she ushered me inside and left me alone.
A short time later, after she’d entered the closet behind me and remained for a few minutes, she returned to the room and spoke quietly while washing her hands.
“I’ll be able to tell you tomorrow, or the following morning at the latest.”
I was surprised. “How would you know so quickly?” Our midwives would conjecture sooner, but never confirmed a pregnancy until a second bleed had been skipped, and there were other symptoms as well.
If I was pregnant, it had to have happened recently. How could she know so soon?
Teen smiled proudly. “There is a species of frog here in Ebonreach—they are tiny creatures—who respond when a pregnant women’s urine is added to their water. Their skins change color, and they begin to produce eggs.”
I grimaced. “You make them swim in—”
“No, no!” she laughed, and patted my arm. “Just a small amount of urine added to a terrarium where I have them in the garden. Don’t worry. I don’t bathe them in it,” she chuckled.
Relieved, and a bit sheepish, I smiled. “Oh, okay. Well, thank you.”
“If you aren’t pregnant, it will take two days to be certain. Either way, I’ll send a message through Caelan. We’ll use words we agree upon ourselves so that others won’t understand. Then, no one will know before you.”
I had no idea where we would be, or what we’d be doing by then. Caelan already knew that Lucifer had declared me pregnant—all of the Golden Eyes did. So, it seemed silly to be nervous about others learning of this. Yet, I suddenly felt very fragile.
I swallowed hard. “That… that would be good.” Why did my throat pinch? Why did I have to blink rapidly to keep my eyes clear?
Teen gave a soft smile and placed a clean, cool hand on my arm, but her eyes grew compassionate.
“I know it’s frightening—the Neph’s size is…
intimidating. And there is great risk—but over the years, we’ve learned ways for you to move, particularly late in the pregnancy, that will help position the babe for the best likelihood of a safe delivery.
We should meet every week so I can help you, and after the baby is born, I have herbs that can stop another—”
I raised my hands, leaning away from her. “I don’t even know if I’m pregnant yet! I’m only checking because… because the Fallen…” I shook my head. “I was taking herbs. I don’t think there’s a baby. But I wanted to be sure.”
Teen kept smiling, but her eyes grew a little sad.
“Dee, the Neph are incredibly fertile. Is there any chance you skipped your herbs for a day or two?”
I shrugged. But nerves twisted in my chest. Of course there was a chance. I’d been on a mission. Travelling. Fighting. Flying.
When I didn’t answer, Teen squeezed my arm. “I should tell you… it’s rare that a woman comes to me for this test, and the frogs don’t reveal it,” she said sympathetically. “Perhaps… perhaps it would be best to prepare yourself for that?”
The shock rattled me to my bones. Which made no sense.
Lucifer had told us. Jann believed this from the very first moment.
He already treated me as if it were a given.
I’d half-believed it myself. I’d been more tired than usual—though, no wonder why!
My appetite was strangely changeable. I expected her to tell me I was pregnant…
So why did those words hit me like a punch to the face?
I just stared at her as she rubbed my arm, and kept her voice low and warm. “If you’re lucky, you won’t be ill. But your body will be weary. Growing a Neph baby is… consuming. It requires all of your body’s reserves, and then some.”
She didn’t mention the fact that most women died.
Either during pregnancy, or when they attempted to deliver.
I knew that. I thought I’d made my peace with it.
But as I tried to stammer out a response to her—an assurance that I would deal with whatever came—my mind failed me and my tongue tripped on every word.
Teen took pity on me, and decided not to press.
“Whether it’s a babe or not, if you’re weary, eating fruits and vegetables and dark meats will help.
Every day, for every meal. Not the dried meats—the fat, succulent kind.
Tell your male that you’re likely pregnant.
He’ll gladly feed you well. Make yourself eat even when you’re tired.
Small meals, often, if you’re suffering sickness.
Do as little physical work as possible—though of course, we can’t always control that.
Telling your Neph will help. Has he claimed you? ”
That was when I was reminded that everyone here thought I was a slave. A possession of Jann’s. My skin crawled.
“Y-yes.” I forced myself to leave it at that. To not lecture her on the fact that I wasn’t a chattel, I was a human being—and she was too!
But she only looked relieved. “That’s much better,” she said, nodding. “You’ll be much safer that way. Make certain he knows when it’s confirmed. He’ll protect you—but he’ll also brag. You’ll gain more attention from the others. So, stick close to him.”
As she went on, mostly telling me things I already knew—because Jann had fiercely and darkly explained how the Neph regarded women, and those who were able to provide offspring—my head reeled, and my throat pinched.
I didn’t know why, but I needed her to stop talking about how many men here would try to steal me.
“How did you come to be here?” I blurted. “You’re obviously an educated woman and… and very kind. How did you end up here? Were you stolen from Meyrath?”
Teen took a breath, and looked away from me for a moment. At some point, we’d settled on either end of her only couch. She folded her hands in her lap, then turned back to me.
“I was raised in a home where the men were… violent. But also weak in their minds—you understand?”
I did, and I nodded, hoping my expression spoke of the sympathy I felt for her.
“I fled when my father threatened to marry me off to one of his friends. I had nothing. I didn’t have the fortitude for prostitution, and I wasn’t refined enough to be a lady’s maid.
I’d always heard the legends of the Nephilim, but living outside the city as we did, I’d never seen them up close.
Only flying overhead. They were very handsome and…
well, I was young, desperate, and a little bit silly.
I told myself that I was used to violent men.
That their strength would keep me safe, and their wealth and power was worth the exchange of my freedom.
I went to the city and got word to a slave trader.
I… volunteered,” she said with a sad shrug.
“Of course, I learned quickly that my romantic ideals were na?ve.” Her eyes grew distant, and her expression faltered.
When I reached for her hand, she gave it a squeeze, then let go and waved me off.
“It was many years ago now. I’ve found my place.
I’m no longer at risk—I can’t have children, you see.
So I have learned other ways to become valuable to them. They mostly leave me alone now.”
Mostly? I wasn’t sure whether to ask.