Chapter 31 Give Me Your Word
~ YILAN ~
I’d been pacing Melek’s chambers when Diadre finally appeared, face pale, and eyes pinched with concern.
Melek cursed and whirled, startled by her appearance. She raised a hand in apology, but linked with me.
‘Shroud Melek. Get him over to Jann’s apartment. The others are all preparing for the hunt. No one will suspect Melek is so close. It’s the safest place. The hounds are barred from the Advisor’s chambers.’
I wasn’t so sure, but immediately reached for Melek’s mind.
He stood to the side, watching us, waiting impatiently for me to fill him in, because we couldn’t make any sound in here.
‘She says I’m to take you to Jann’s apartments.
It’ll be barred from the hounds, and no one will suspect you of staying so close. ’
Outside, the rumble of the city rose and we all instinctively looked, though there was nothing but a wall to see. Since Gall’s announcement, the sound had come in waves, the city plunged into celebration, peppered with panic.
‘You two go. I’ll stay here. The hounds won’t come for me even if they scent me.’
I snarled at him. ‘We’re the ones they won’t come for—we can shadow walk. They won’t even know we’re present!’
Melek took a step towards me, his face contorting in hot anger. ‘The hounds don’t hunt by sight, but by scent of the soul! They will take you the moment they cross your path!’
‘You still question yourself as soulless, Melek?’ I roared back in the link. ‘How many Nephilim carry green eyes because of your example now? How many—’
‘Yilan, we have to go,’ Diadre interrupted. ‘Time is short. Jann’s afraid they might release the hounds early, because it’s the kind of sick shit they do.’
I shook my head, my eyes never leaving Melek’s. But I passed on to him what she’d said and he nodded.
‘She’s right. Go.’
‘I’m not going without you!’
‘You have no choice—I have to warn the army. We’ll need to blockade the tunnels in case the hounds run outside the city walls.’
‘Well, we need to warn the women we’ve been speaking to! With the messages we’ve been sending through them, I’m certain the Golden Eyes will target them—’
‘You don’t step one fucking foot outside Jann’s chamber, Yilan,’ Melek growled. ‘Once I’ve warned the troops, I’ll circle back and find Istral and Gall—’
Diadre looked back and forth between us as I stormed to his toes.
‘Do not ask me to sit on my heels while you try to save everyone alone—’
‘You can’t be out there with the hounds!’
‘Neither can you!’
‘Of course I can—but regardless, we have no choice! We can’t let this go any further—’
Diadre sucked in a breath and turned, half-disappearing into the shadow before solidifying again. When I looked at her, she stared with a pleading apology in her eyes. ‘Lucifer has ordered them all to bring their slaves and women. Jann has to take me to the hunt,’ she sent, her voice broken.
‘What?! But the hounds—’
‘Lucifer is saying he’ll make certain they don’t hurt us, but Jann’s not sure. He’s terrified…’
‘Go,’ I urged her. ‘Melek can show me the way to Jann’s apartments. But the moment he’s gone, I’m leaving too—I’m going to find my sister, and warn as many of the women as I can.’
‘What about the hounds?’ Diadre asked, carefully not looking at Melek—I could have hugged her for not challenging my defiance of his orders.
‘That’s what shadow walking is for,’ I said grimly, turning from her to Melek to tell him that he’d have to show me the way to Jann’s rooms.
There was no way I was staying there all night. No fucking way.
The following hour was a blur, and it wasn’t until I’d shrouded Melek all the way to Jann’s apartment that we realized… he couldn’t leave the palace without me. At least, not invisibly.
Another silent argument had ensued—surely this was just more evidence that I needed to be out there and working?—until Melek and I were toe to toe, snarling and screaming in our minds, both of us frantic and angry.
Then my mate froze.
I tensed immediately, whipping my head left and right, looking for the threat. Then jerked back to face Melek when his hand landed on my arm.
His gaze was intense, his emerald eyes pinched with worry.
‘What’s wrong? What happened?’ I asked quickly.
‘If this is the last time we speak, I don’t want it to be an argument,’ he sent quietly, his voice rough with emotion.
I bristled. ‘This isn’t going to be the last time—’
‘Yilan… we are stranded in the city while every citizen hunts every enemy—which is us. Our allies are gathered in one place, sitting ducks for the hounds if they find the caverns. I have to warn them. But warning them means leaving you and—’
‘You can’t get out of here unseen without me.’
‘So, I go disguised. I’ll wear one of the merchant cloaks’
‘But—’
“Yilan, there’s no time.” He spoke the words so softly, yet they penetrated through my skin, my ribs, right to my heart. Right through my anger.
He stood over me, his chest rising and falling too quickly, his expression pained. “There’s no time, and no way to make more time. I have to go, and we both know it.”
I stared at him, the words so do I, on the tip of my tongue. But he looked so frightened—not for himself, but for me—that I swallowed them back.
I could go find the women and return faster than he would. He wouldn’t even know I’d been gone. He didn’t need to worry about that on top of everything else.
Blowing out a breath, I stepped up to press myself into his chest, nodding. ‘Go.’
‘Yilan… you know that I love you more than—’
‘I know. Me too. This isn’t goodbye, Melek. We’re just on another mission. One that takes us in different directions for a matter of hours. That’s all. Go. I’ll be here when you return.’
He cupped my face and lifted my chin, searching my eyes. ‘Make sure that you are—please. Yilan… if I lost you…’
Suddenly swallowing the pinch of tears, I shook my head and gripped his waist. ‘You aren’t losing me, and I’m not losing you.
You’re going to warn our friends—and later, when the hounds are back in their cages, and our enemies have been lulled into a false sense of security, when you and I are back together, we’re going to lead our allies against these sick men—and we’re going to win. ’
He nodded his head. ‘We can only do that if you stay safe. Here.’
I stroked his chest and face. ‘I’m—’
‘No, Yilan… I need you to give me your word that you won’t leave here unless the danger has descended and you’re fleeing it. I need you to promise me that you’ll leave Gall and Istral to me, and the other women… that you’ll stay here and pray. Because—’
‘Melek, please. You can’t ask me to—’
‘Because if you don’t, I can’t leave—and that means thousands of our allies could die before they’ve even met battle.’
I drew up sharp. ‘What?! What are you saying?’
Melek’s gaze was pained. He gripped my face.
I gripped his wrists. ‘Yilan, don’t you get it—you’re the other half of my heart.
I know you. You think you can go. You think you can shadow walk.
You think you can warn the women and find your sister—and you think you’ll get back here before I do, so I won’t know.
But I do know, and I can’t let it happen.
I can’t lose you. We can’t lose you for the sake of some spiritualist who’s lost her business.
It isn’t fair, but it also doesn’t change.
You are a queen, and my mate—Neither of us will survive this without the other. Yilan, you have to stay here.’
I gaped at him, my mouth opening and closing.
He wanted me to stay here, alone, while all three of them were out there, taking action?!
‘Yes. Because sometimes the most important action to take, is keeping yourself safe.’
I gaped. ‘What about you?!’
‘I can fly,’ he growled. ‘And the hounds won’t come for me.
I have to warn our army, then I will return to you—hopefully with my son and your sister right alongside me.
Even if they aren’t… I’m coming back for you, Yilan.
I’m not risking my life. I know the difference between a strategic necessity, and avoiding heartache.
It’s a terrible truth of war that we have to choose who to save.
Today I’m choosing you—our queen—and the army at our backs.
Now, please. I have to go. Please… give me your word, Yilan.
Say it plainly. Say you’ll stay here unless it’s a matter of life and death for us. ’
Tears welled, blurring my vision. This was so unfair! Since I’d lied to him once before, measured my words and kept him in the dark about my plans—and got him and Gall safely out of the grip of these fucking bloodthirsty Neph!—he’d made me promise never to shroud my intentions again.
I spent a few, fruitless seconds searching for a way out of this, but it didn’t exist—because my mate did know me, and I knew exactly what he asked. Giving him anything less would be nothing short of betrayal.
My heart deflated, tears sliding over my lashes for the poor women left undefended in the city, but I nodded. ‘You have my word, Melek.’
‘Tell me.’
I swallowed, and shot him a glare, but I could feel the love washing from him in the bond.
Knew the fear he felt at the thought of me being out there.
Knew his bullshit plan was to take all the risk himself because he valued me more than his own life.
Even though I hated it, and even though my skin was going to blister every moment that I had to sit here, safe, while the others did the real work. I nodded.
‘I give you my word—I won’t leave here unless it’s a matter of life and death for me, or you. Or Jann or Diadre—or Gall and Istral,’ I added hurriedly.
Melek’s lips thinned, but he nodded. ‘Thank you.’
‘Melek—’
‘I have to go, Yilan. There’s no more time.
’ He pulled me up onto my toes and kissed me.
Panic screamed through me and I clawed at him, my tears coming thicker and faster.
Then he broke away, stroked my face, whispered his love, then marched straight to one of the rooms off Jann’s sitting area and was back moments later, swathed from head to toe in a merchant’s hooded cloak, with a moneybelt at his waist, and gloves on his hands.
His eyes caught mine, and a rush of love and fear reached me through the bond, but he walked straight to the doors that opened onto the balcony. ‘I love you. To my soul.’
‘I love you too. Even to death, Melek.’
His steps stuttered, but he kept moving. Then moments later the door closed behind him, and he was gone from sight.
I hurried to the window and watched him manifest his wings, mutter something to himself, then launch from the balcony like an arrow from a bow.
Then he was gone, and I was left there in silence. Alone. Impotent. Scared.
And fucking furious.