8. Chapter Seven
Chapter Seven
Lisette
“B londie?”
I turn on my heels and lock eyes with Erin.
“Houdini?”
A smile grows on her face as she looks between me and Bay. “Of course, you’re friends with Bay. She has a thing for damaged goods.” She teases before hugging Bay who laughs.
“ She’s damaged goods, you’re just damaged,” Bay counters, pulling a laugh out of us both.
I’ve known Bay for nearly eight years now; we met in college and she knows me better than most people, so it feels good knowing she thinks I’m damaged goods and not just damaged. Joke or not.
When Erin pulls away, she nods for the donut table. “It’s not sandwich day.” She brings up our conversation when we met at the bar.
“It’s been a long day, but if there’s not at least one good donut in that pile, we all get to drink tonight.”
Erin lets out a quiet laugh, and the man beside her glances between us, his brows pulled together.
“Winter lets us have a cheat day,” I whisper and he only looks more concerned. “Oh, are you not at that stage?” He’s clearly new here and this is too good to pass up.
“She’s joking.” Winter shoves my back before coming beside me and giving me a look. She tucks her white hair behind her ear before serving a donut on a napkin and handing it to the guy. “I love to see new faces, please”—she gestures to the circle of chairs—“Sit wherever you’d like.”
He walks off after thanking her and she turns to me accusingly, but I offer a smile in return. “Hello there, December.”
She rolls her eyes playfully as she turns to make a cup of coffee. “You don’t usually come in today.” She peeks at me before turning to add sugar to her cup. “Should I be worried?”
“Of course, you should,” I say with as much enthusiasm as I can, and a smile she’s clearly fighting appears on her face.
“You’re always the light of my day, Lisette.” She stirs her drink with a small smile, the wrinkles near her eyes more prominent.
“I’m glad someone is benefiting from my crippling depression.” I tap her shoulder twice and head over to the circle with Bay and Erin before she can respond.
I turn to Bay as she takes her seat. “Since I already gave you the recap in the car, do I have to share?”
“You don’t have to. If you just needed to be in this space, then you know you can sit silently and soak it up.” She shrugs before a smile touches her lips. “If you don’t share, at least talk to Winter at the end. I think it’ll be good for you to hear whatever advice she has to give.”
I nod in return as Winter makes her way over to start the meeting. There are a few familiar faces and they look worse than I’m feeling, which makes me feel better.
I know that sounds bad, but nothing is worse than coming to a meeting and everyone is doing good. It’s rare, but I came in hung over once and had the courage to share first. Everyone after me spoke about how their life was getting better. I drank again once I left.
“Hello everyone,” Winter starts with a bright smile. “I see a lot of new faces which makes me so happy. If you’re up for it, I’d love for you all to introduce yourselves.”
The newbies share their names and sad stories as my anxiety begins to eat at me. I zone out and my call with Ana is on a loop in my mind. I slip my hand into my pocket and hold onto the bottle of liquor, letting myself feel good about not being hungover like she thought I was.
When I hear sniffing, I look up and Bay is fighting back tears. I feel my brows furrow as I look around the room, but one of the new guys is still sharing and he’s just talking about being from Washington.
I lean into Bay as I whisper, “Remind me not to take you to Seattle.”
A smile appears on her face as she looks up to the ceiling and blinks away her tears. “Sorry, I know you don’t like feelings.” She faces forward again, her eyes still glassy.
“I’m not going to hold your hand or hug you, but don’t let me stop you from crying.” I shrug and her smile grows as she wipes a tear.
Winter notices her struggling, but waits for the new people to finish before focusing on her again. “Bay,” she starts, her somber smile on her. “What’s going on, dear?”
Bay takes in a deep breath before smiling over at Winter, but she’s still fighting back tears. “I feel like ever since my abortion, I’ve been seeing so many things that remind me of it. I don’t think I made a mistake, but it hurts, and seeing pregnant women, or baby bottles in the chip aisle because people don’t put shit back where they found them in Walmart, isn’t helping.”
She starts crying again and a laugh escapes me. “I’m sorry.” I cover my mouth with my hand when a few people look at me. “I laugh when I’m uncomfortable,” I clarify.
“I hate you.” Bay lets out a laugh that mixes with a cry. “Ugh!” She looks up at the ceiling and wipes her tears. “Okay, I don’t want to cry anymore, so Lisette needs to share, and since she interrupted, we can all laugh at her together. I promise it’s good.”
The group lets out a laugh, and I smile around the room as they give me a minute to collect my thoughts. “I have a little sister,” I start. “Two of them.” My eyes fall to my hand as I pick at my nails.
“My birth parents were both addicts and absent when I was a kid. The boy next door also had a shitty mom, and we became best friends,” I say, not wanting to say Sire’s name. “Then we met these twins at school, and they had a perfect life.”
I shake my head as images of August and Sage’s huge childhood home come to mind. I thought they were royalty when I first went to their house.
“They became my family, and we called their parents mom and dad. Then they adopted the boy next door, but couldn’t adopt me since my parents had rights and shit, and they couldn’t take my sisters.” I feel myself getting bitter, but not at the Hales, it’s the reminder of my birth parents that puts the sour feeling in me.
“Although they didn’t adopt me, they were still my family and I practically lived with them, but as the years went by, I started using drugs in middle school, and Ana, my bio sister, hated me for becoming my parents. She treated me like shit and I couldn’t face her, so I officially moved in with my other family.”
I feel everyone watching me as I continue. “My relationship with her was never good, but I went to her for money after not seeing her in years, and that was the nail in the coffin for us.”
My throat tightens at the reminder of one of my lowest points.
“Ana just has so much resentment for me because I moved out of that house. She thinks I abandoned her, but I was a kid too. Why is it my fault for not giving up my childhood to raise them? Yes, I feel like shit about it, but they had their grandma who was basically raising them and refused to take me in. I had no one but the Hales.”
I look over at Winter for an answer and she nods in understanding.
“It wasn’t your job to raise your sisters. Don’t burn yourself for your parents’ sins.”
Her words lift every guilty feeling off of my shoulders.
“Ana is great for raising her little sister, but she has no right to belittle you because she resents her parents for making her feel like she needed to step up and be the parent. I think she’s jealous that you escaped. It’s completely fine to be angry, but to blame you? What they endured wasn’t your fault and your presence wouldn’t have made much of a difference because you were a child .”
I nod in return as I blink my tears away, refusing to cry because of Ana, of all people.
Beside me, Bay shoves my arm. “Tell them about how you told your seventeen-year-old sister to buy sex toys and lube.”
“Oh my god.” I look up at the ceiling as I let out a laugh.
“She’s bonding with her younger sister,” Bay tells the group and I shove her as they laugh at us.
Turning to the group, I defend myself. “She’s looking for male validation, as I once did. I told her she doesn’t need a useless man for an orgasm, and Ana thinks I told her to go become a damn pornstar.” I roll my eyes at the reminder and the entire group seems to appreciate the lighter mood before the rest of the sob stories begin.
Naps after a meeting are the best, but being awoken by someone knocking on your door isn’t. A yawn escapes me as I open the door. When I see Jackson, I blink a few times to make sure my eyes aren’t playing a trick on me.
“Hey,” he starts softly. I take a minute to take him in, but it only adds to my confusion. He’s in a navy blue suit and I’m realizing he’s almost always in a suit.
“I needed to go into the office,” he says, and I’m going to assume that explains the outfit. “These are for you.” He holds up a bouquet of flowers and I squint my eyes, trying to make sense of what’s happening.
“What are you doing here?” I finally say.
“I’m on my way to pick up Isabelle.”
I wait for him to add more, but he takes too long, so I say, “Okay? This isn’t Sire’s house.”
A smile appears on his face and my eyes land on his one dimple. “I’m aware. It was obvious you weren’t okay when I asked earlier, so I got you feel-better flowers.” He holds them out to me, but I don’t take them.
“How did you get my address?” I cross my arms as I look up at him.
“I asked August for it.” He shakes his head now. “He told Sire, who threatened to tell my daughter the Tooth Fairy isn’t real if I flirted with you or entered your house so”—he pushes the flowers further to me—“I am here strictly ‘to give you these feel better flowers and state that I am not interested in you.’” He mimics Sire’s voice and I let out a quiet laugh as I shake my head at how annoying my brother is.
I take the flowers from him, and by some chance, he got my least favorite ones.
“Sire told me irises were your favorite.”
I let out a scoff as I examine the blue irises and white lilies. “Of course, he did.”
“Do you not like them?” He looks between the bouquet and me, his brows pulled together.
“I don’t like things that don’t last.”
He studies me for a beat before glancing back at the flowers. “That’s the beauty in them though. We learn to appreciate them while they’re here.”
I shake my head at his words. “I’d rather not get attached to things that are just going to die.”
He goes still.
“But thank you,” I voice, trying not to sound completely ungrateful and pessimistic.
I can see his mind running with different thoughts, but he instead changes the topic.
“When I went to pick up Belle today, her teacher told me she did really well during popcorn reading.”
My eyes meet his and he looks as grateful as he sounds.
“They’re ‘thank you’ flowers and ‘ please keep tutoring my kid because I’m desperate’ flowers.”
I shake my head at him as I lean against the door frame. “So they’re feel better flowers, thank you flowers, and a bribe? The math isn’t making sense, Jackson Jones. One bouquet equals one reason. I’m afraid I can only accept one, and since I feel like shit, these are my feel-better flowers.” I shrug.
He smirks down at me. “Fair enough.”
I nod in return. “Find another tutor and find another way to say thank you.”
His smirk grows into a smile. “I’ll get you another bouquet as my bribe and find another way to say thank you,” he counters.
His eyes search mine and slowly, his smile fades. “Your brother wouldn’t tell me what upset you, but I hope the flowers make you feel better.”
I nod in return as I take a deep breath of the bouquet. I plaster a smile on my face as I let out a relieved breath. “Ahhh, I can already feel the sadness seeping out of me. These are great.”
He laughs softly before turning more serious. “I don’t like burning bridges with people my daughter likes, so I’m sorry I kept pressing you about it earlier and upsetting you.”
I shake my head at him. “ I’m sorry for being a bitch.”
He quickly counters. “It was none of my business, I should’ve left you alone.”
“Yeah, but you care and I appreciate that. My brothers have good friends.”
A smile touches his lips.
“I told Belle you’ll get her ice cream if she passed her spelling test. Don’t make me look like a liar.” I point at him.
“We wouldn’t want that.” Before turning away he adds, “Thanks again, not Demeter Lissy.”
A laugh escapes me, and I close the door on him. I rest the bouquet on my table and shake my head at the sight of the irises before grabbing my phone.
The first ring barely goes through before Sire answers the FaceTime and I can’t help but smile. “Sitting around and waiting for me to call, huh?”
He rolls his eyes at me, but I can see the smile he’s biting back. “Talk to me.”
I flop onto my couch as I give in. “Harmony and I have been hanging out.”
His brows furrow. “Harmony as in—”
“As in my baby sister.”
He nods slowly as his gears start turning and I catch him up on the last few months of my life I’ve been keeping from him. He looks shocked by the end of it and I know it’s because I usually tell him everything. When I add what happened today with Ana, I can see his annoyance growing.
“I still hate them.” He rolls his eyes and I hold back a smile.
It truly makes me feel good knowing I’m not the only one who still holds resentment towards them, but it makes me feel even better because he gets it. His bio mom is worse than mine, so he understands every loathing ounce within.
“I know Harmony was a baby when we moved in with the twins but if bonding with her is causing this much commotion, just leave.”
I shake my head at him, knowing he would say that. “She’s a kid, Sire. When we moved in with the Hales, I didn’t know any better. Now I do and she’s the one who wants to be in my life. Ana is a bitter bitch, and her mom is still using. I can’t shut her out.”
He gives me a knowing look. “If it’s costing you your mental health and sobriety, yes you can.”
“Harmony is not the problem,” I counter. “I know what I’m doing. Plus, I like her. She’s like a mini-me.”
He rolls his eyes now. “So she’s an annoying brat? Love her already.”
I stifle a laugh at him. “It’s weird because she’s the youngest and I know I’m technically the oldest to them, but with our family, I’m the youngest so she really is just like me. She looks like me too, it’s weird.”
A smile grows on his face as he watches me. “You like her,” he voices as if he’s just realizing.
“She’s cool, I guess.” I brush him off but the truth is, I can totally see myself being an older sister to Harmony.
At the sound of princess music and Isabelle singing along, I change the topic. “You told Jackson not to flirt with me?”
Sire watches me carefully before asking, “Did he?”
I roll my eyes at him. “Why would he, you weirdo? We barely know each other since we only speak for two seconds when he picks up and drops off his kid.”
Sire thinks about it before nodding. “True, but I don’t care. I already have to suffer through someone I hate dating Sage,” he mentions Liam, his rival, who our sister is madly in love with. “I don’t need my best friend with my other sister.” He rolls his eyes, but I know deep down, he’s happy our sister is happy.
Per usual, I decide to mess with him. “Well, if it bothers you so much I’ll be sure to add him to my to-do list.”
“Lisette,” he warns and I offer him a smile before setting my phone up so he can see me write on the paper in front of me.
“Fuck Sire’s DILF best friend.” I add an exclamation point, and when I look back at Sire, he doesn’t look amused. “Put his offspring on the phone,” I say with a laugh.
Sire rises from the table before walking to the living room, and when I hear the movie playing, I know they didn’t read at all. He hands her the phone and she smiles when she sees me.
“Hi, Lissy. Are you feeling better?”
I smile at her. “Yes, I am,” I answer honestly.
She nods before a guilty look covers her face. “We didn’t work today.”
I shake my head and she bites back a smile. “If your dad asks, just blame it on Uncle Sigh.”
She quickly agrees and laughs at something Sire says.
“I heard your popcorn reading went well. I’m proud of you, kid.”
She quickly gets comfortable as she tells me about it. “I kinda cheated.” She giggles and a smile touches my lips. “I counted how many people was in front of me, then I counted the lines and practiced mine in my head, so when it was my turn, I read it fast.”
I let out a laugh and when she throws her head back and holds her stomach as she laughs with me, I laugh harder.