Chapter 10
Ten
ALEX
I come to, to the feeling of something poking me in the forehead. When I open my eyes, Grace is standing by the bed with her finger hovering over my face.
“Psst, wake up.” She starts to poke me again before I grab her hand.
“Why are you poking me, and what time is it?” I look around for my phone. When I grab it, the display says it’s only a little after seven. “Don’t kids usually sleep in when they aren’t in school?”
“I want pancakes,” she huffs and rocks back on her heels.
“Okay, what do you want me to do about that?” I ask, amused.
“You’re going to get up and make pancakes with me.” She crosses her arms and sticks her bottom lip out.
“Do you always barge in on people when they’re sleeping to ask for pancakes? Do you not know how to knock?” I let out a yawn and rub the sleep from my eyes.
“Knocking would wake mom up and I don’t want her to get up yet.” Putting her hands on her hips she stares at me expectantly.
“All right, fine, give me five minutes.” I pull the covers back and shoo her out of the room.
I can’t express how I feel after last night. Somehow, I feel more rested than I ever have in my life despite waking up in a strange bed in a house I’d never been in before. After being on the run for so long I still can’t go anywhere without a duffle bag filled with several changes of clothing and basic hygiene necessities. That definitely came in handy last night—I grab my toiletry case out of my go-bag and head to the bathroom
I’m finishing brushing my teeth when Grace comes up the stairs. I take one last look at myself in the mirror and smile. I hardly recognize the man staring back at me. Have I ever looked this happy? When I step out and into the hallway, Grace is tapping her foot impatiently with her arms folded.
“It’s been more than five minutes.” She uncrosses her arm and grabs my hand, pulling me toward the stairs. “Come on, we have to do it before Mom gets up and ruins our fun.”
When we get to the kitchen, I immediately find the coffee maker and put on a pot of coffee. This is not my home. So why do I feel more at home here than I do there?
Maybe because you’re still in love with Marissa and being here with her and Grace is exactly where you’ve always belonged. I push the nagging voice out of my head and look for ingredients.
“I don’t think you have any pancake mix,” I say as I open the last cabinet.
“Do you really need a mix? Can’t you just use what we have?”
“Well, I guess I could go get my phone and look up a recipe.” I start to head back to my room, but Grace stops me.
“Or we could just ask Jake.” She looks at me like it’s the most obvious thing in the world.
“Who’s Jake?” I find myself suddenly wondering if there’s another person who lives here that I have somehow missed. Marissa said she wasn’t seeing anyone, but she also ran away and hid the fact that I have a daughter for years, so I’m not sure I can really trust her.
“Hello! I am Jake. I’m a virtual assistant smart speaker that can help you with many tasks. I can help you with timers and schedules, tell you the weather or news, help you find recipes, or call for help in an emergency,” says an automated voice from somewhere in the room.
“Why did your mom name the smart speaker Jake ?”
“Umm, because she’s weird, you should know that.” She shrugs like she’s just told me the most natural thing in the world. “Jake, find me a recipe for pancakes?”
The smart speaker rattles off a recipe that seems easy, so I start getting the ingredients out of the cabinets. I lay the flour, baking powder, baking soda, and sugar on the counter. Grace gets a bowl and measuring cups. I recite Jake’s instructions on how much flour is needed before grabbing the eggs and milk out of the fridge.
When I turn back around, there is very little flour in the bowl. Most of it is on the counter and on Grace. “How did you manage to get it everywhere?” I laugh.
“It just kind of exploded, okay.” She rolls her eyes, but when she notices I’m laughing, she slings a handful toward me.
“Oh, so it’s going to be like that? Okay.” I set the eggs and milk on the counter, stick my hand in the flour bowl, and then leave a big white handprint on her cheek.
The next few minutes are full of laughter and squealing as we chase each other around the kitchen, throwing flour.
“What the hell is going on?” Marissa yells, making us both jump.
“He did it!”
“She did it!” Grace and I say at the same time, pointing to each other.
“Really, Alex, how old are you?” She rolls her eyes and leans against the door frame. Her hair is pulled into a bun and I can’t help but smile at her cat pajamas that have don’t stress meowt written across the shirt.
“Umm…” Playfully, I pretend to think about it. “Thirty-seven.”
“More like seven.” Her eyes crinkle around the edges as she lets out a genuine laugh before pushing herself off of the door. “Do I even want to know what you guys were doing?
“Well, what happened was Gracie woke me up saying she wanted pancakes, and I wasn’t entirely sure how to make pancakes so?—”
“Pancakes? You destroyed my kitchen over pancakes?” She cuts me off.
“It would appear that way, but I promise it’s not entirely our fault that the flour just kind of exploded on its own.”
“Oh really?” She walks over to the sink and wets two dishcloths. “I guess it can clean itself, too, right?” Tossing one to each of us, she leans back against the sink, watching.
Grace wipes one end of the counter, and I do the other. She looks up at me, and I motion with my head to the bowl of flour before darting my eyes to Marissa. Once she realizes what I am trying to say she smiles the widest grin I’ve ever seen. Casually, she walks around the counter, grabs the bowl, and tosses the remaining flour on Marissa before sauntering back over and giving me a high-five.
“Wow, you really just went there, didn’t you?” Her stoic expression is not giving me any hint as to whether she’s actually mad or not.
I open my mouth to defend Grace, but before I can say anything, Marissa grabs the retractable sprayer from the sink and turns it on both of us. Grace squeals and jumps behind me. Stalking over to the sink, my only intention is to take the sprayer from her, but my body has a mind of its own.
I lean down and place my hands on the sink on either side of Marissa, effectively caging her in. With my body pressed right against hers, her strawberry shampoo is so strong that it’s intoxicating. It pulls me in until I’m so close our noses are practically touching. She looks up at me defiantly, and all I can think about is kissing her. “That wasn’t very nice, Red.” The nickname slips out without even a second thought.
“Oh really? Neither was destroying my kitchen and getting your daughter to throw flour at me.” Her smirk makes my heart flutter.
“Oh, so she’s my daughter when she’s in trouble?”
“Yes.” She nods and leans in closer, our lips almost touching when she speaks. “My daughter is a perfect angel; yours is an absolute terror.” She looks at me like she can read my mind, knowing exactly what I want to do, and is daring me to do it.
“Oh, is that so?” I reach up, brush a strand of her red hair out of her face, and tuck it behind her ear. I cup her neck, and just as our lips are about to touch, a blast of cold water hits us both in the side of the face, breaking the spell.
Shrieking, I jump away from Marissa who hides behind me to avoid the spray of water. “I don’t think so.” I turn and wrap my arms around her, pulling her in front of me. Reveling in the feeling of having her pressed against me, burying her face in my chest as Grace soaks her from the back of her head down to the back of her thighs. She squirms, trying to get away, but I hold her tighter. “You started this,” I whisper in her ear.
“No, Gracie started it,” she squeals and tries to pull away again, but I don’t let her.
“And she gets to finish it.” As soon as the words leave my mouth, A jet of icy water hits me right in the face. “Okay, enough.” I use the best dad voice I can muster, and Grace drops the sprayer.
“Well, I was going to offer to cook breakfast while you two got cleaned up, but now I need a shower.” Marissa pulls herself out of my arms, and reluctantly, I let her.
“Go take a shower. We’ll clean up our mess.”
Just as Marissa gets to the top of the stairs I turn to Grace. “All right, leave the mess in here to me and go clean yourself up.”
While Grace is upstairs, I clean the kitchen. I mop up the water and make sure there is no trace of flour left on the counter. When the kitchen is back as it should be, I follow the recipe the smart speaker gave us, mixing up the pancake batter much faster than before. I find some sausage and eggs in the fridge, and as I am closing it, I notice the pictures spread across it. There are many I recognize from the scrapbooks but a few I don’t. There’s one of Grace as a baby playing in a swimming pool. Another one of her on her first day of school. I stare at one of Marissa, her sister, and a boy in a high school graduation gown holding a young Grace, who is wearing the matching cap and a black and white polka dot dress.
“That’s my cousin Dave.” Grace walks in, sits at the center island, leans her elbows on the counter, and props her head up with her hands. “He’s a pain in the butt, but I miss him sometimes.”
“Oh, really? Where is he?” I set the bacon and sausage on the counter and heat the griddle.
“He’s in med school in New York. He is going to be a surgeon.”
“My sister Annie went to school in New York. That’s actually where she met her husband. They have two girls a few years younger than you.” I toss the sausage and bacon in the skillet.
“Do they still live in New York?” Her face lights up. “Maybe I can meet them next time we go see Dave.”
“No, they moved back to Germany once they graduated.” Her face falls instantly. “Don’t worry, I’m sure you will get to meet them sometime.”
“Why does Germany have to be so far away? Does all your family live there? You still haven’t told me much about them,” she sighs.
“My mom passed away not long before I met your mother. None of us really have anything to do with my father. I’ve met him a few times, but we don’t have a relationship. So for me, family is just me and my sisters. And now, you.” I point my spatula at her.
“Have you told them about me? Do they want to meet me too?” She taps her fingers on the counter.
“I haven’t spoken to Annie recently, but I did tell Free—nothing is a secret for too long with her. I’m going back home to visit this week.”
She perks up at that. “Can I come?”
“I don’t think your mom would be okay with that, plus I’m not sure you’re ready. Don’t you want to get to know me a little more first?” I lift the meat off of the griddle and start fixing the pancakes.
“I see you figured out how to make pancakes after all,” Marissa says, leaning on the counter beside Grace.
“Yes, as it turns out it’s not that hard. You know when the ingredients cooperate.” I laugh.
“Hmm, I guess so.” She reaches over, grabs a piece of bacon, and pops it into her mouth. “Not bad, it’s actually edible.”
Smiling, I finish the pancakes, quickly scramble some eggs, and carry it over to the table. “Come on, let’s eat.” I motion for them to sit at the table. It already feels like this is my home.
“Well, if you insist.” Marissa gets plates out of the cabinet. They both join me at the table.
“Actually, I’m going to grab my phone and get out of this wet shirt, real quick.”
She nods and I rush up stairs, pull off my wet shirt over my head and quickly pull a dry one on. I grab my phone and notice an email from the school. Holding my breath, I press the button and quickly skim until I see the words I have been waiting for. I have been hired for the full-time teaching position at East View. I let out a sigh of relief before rushing back to the kitchen.
“Did you know I have cousins in Germany?” Grace excitedly asks Marissa as I’m coming down the stairs.
“I do. Alex told me about them a few weeks ago.” Marissa takes a drink of her water and gives me a sideways glance.
I sit at the table and begin to fix my plate.
“I want to meet them sometime.” Grace shovels a large spoonful of eggs into her mouth.
“I think that would be nice at some point in the future,” Marissa says between bites.
“Dad is going back to visit this week. Can I please go with him? Pleeaassee.”
“Absolutely not. I haven’t had any time with you this summer. You spent the last five weeks in East View, and now that you’re back you expect me to just get you a plane ticket to Germany so you can leave again?”
“I don’t expect you to just let her go, but if you do, you’re welcome to come as well.” I cut off a bit of the pancake and take a bite. Not bad for my first effort.
Her whole-body tenses up. “I have work. I can’t just take off with such short notice,” she scoffs and slams her glass of water on the table.
“It’s okay if you can’t. There will be other opportunities for you both to come.” My phone beeps, and I look at the screen. “Speak of the devil.” I swipe the phone and answer it. “Hey, Freedom.”
“So, how was your visit?” She says in a sing-songy voice.
“I’m still here. Grace wanted me to spend the night. Actually, let me put you on speaker.” I lay the phone down on the counter and press the button, hoping Freedom doesn’t say anything too bad. “Okay, everyone can hear you.”
“Hello, Isa,” she says flatly, and Marissa instantly cringes.
“It’s Marissa,” I correct her.
“Hello, Freedom.” Marissa matches Free’s tone—this is going to be awkward.
“Hey, Freedom! We were just talking about you,” Grace shouts excitedly into the phone.
“You must be Little Freedom! I can’t wait to meet you.”
“We were just trying to talk Mom into letting me come to visit with Dad this week.”
“Oh, that would be perfect! Jennifer is going to be in town this week, too.”
“Who’s Jennifer?” Grace asks, confused.
“She was the other best friend your mother abandoned.” Freedom gasps like she didn’t mean to say that out loud. Freedom has a bit of an issue with self-control when it comes to speaking what is on her mind and this is exactly what I was afraid of. “I’m sorry, Marissa, I shouldn’t have said that.”
“It’s fine. I deserved it. I’ll see if I’m able to get off work, but I can’t make any promises.”
“All right, well, I just wanted to see how things went. I’ll let you go.”
“Bye, Freedom!” Grace and I say in unison, and I hang up the phone.
“Oh, so, I’ve got good news.” I pause, waiting until I have both of their attention. I’m a little nervous about what I have to say. “I got the permanent teaching position at East View.”
“I’m happy you get to stay close, Alex. Congratulations!”
“Yay! We’re moving to East View!” Grace shouts out, causing both Marissa and I to look very confused.
“Absolutely not. Just because Alex lives there does not mean we are moving there,” Marissa scolds her.
“But you moved here from East View. You can move back! Plus, you have Grandma there, too,” she protests.
“Gracie, it’s not the same. I wasn’t really leaving anything behind when I moved here.”
“Yeah, nothing important,” I mumble under my breath, trying not to be bothered by the fact that she just admitted I wasn’t important.
“Fuck,” she sighs. “Alex, I didn’t mean it like that.”
“No, I get it.” I wave her off.
“When I moved here, I had an apartment with a lease that was almost up and a job I didn’t care about. Here, you have school, I have not one but two jobs I love, and we have this house. It’s not as easy to just up and move now. You will still get to spend time with Alex. He can come every weekend if he wants, and we can go visit him,” she says, and I realize I know very little about her life now. I don’t even what she does for a living.
“It’s only three hours. How about I move here and just commute to school?” I reassure Grace. “Or maybe I can get a place in the middle. That way, I’m not driving so far here or to the school.”
“Alex, that’s six hours a day. You can’t do that.” Marissa reaches out to grab my hand and then pulls back, leaving me wishing she hadn’t. “I have no intentions of keeping Gracie from you, so please don’t feel like you have to be right here to be in her life,”
“I know, but I’ve missed so much… I don’t want to miss anymore.” I turn to Grace. “I’ll start looking for a place as soon as we get back from Ewigherz. Maybe you can even help me pick it out.”
“We?” She raises an eyebrow. “Are you really that confident we will be joining you?
“I can only hope.” I wink at her.
As much as I want them to come back to Germany with me, I know pushing Marissa to go before she is ready is going to backfire. It’s not like she can hide from me now so there will always be other opportunities.